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England put in to bat by the sheep stealers.......

R

red indian

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.....and we score 407 runs on the first day! bring it on you convicts!!!
 
Usually many runs scored at Edgbaston
Interesting to note that the Aussies' main strike bowler is now injured
 
drunkenmstr13 said:
how the hell do you play cricket
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A bunch of limeys stand around tossing their balls at each other.

It's considered quite civilized in the UK.

Cheers.
 
Dr. Bill Kobb said:
Cricket?

Hell, I thought he was talking about prison sex... :wow:
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Yeah, that whole "tossing balls at each other" thing kind of threw me off.
 
Well yeah. That and the whole 'convicts' thing. And the 'put in to bat', and the 'sheep-stealers'. I figured they might be new terms inmates used for horrible acts.

I've been scarred ever since I learned what 'salad-tossing' meant... :xlime:
 
yeah yeah ok wise guys.....

....next you will be telling me, Base Ball is a totally rational and simple ball game.
 
What exactly do you mean by the terms Base Ball and Ball Game? Are these some sort of bathhouse code for deviant sex acts?

Okay already, I'll stop with that nonsense. I don't even watch any sports with any regularity. There's no time to, anymore.

If I was going to tune in, though, it'd have to be something reaallllyy interesting, like Human Tetherball, or Sewerpipe Spelunking, or Frisbee-Tag With Claymore Mines or Naked Iceskating Derby(it'd be like the rollerskating women's teams they used to have in the wee hours in the early 70's, `cept on ice, naked, with spankings...).

I am literally incapable of sitting through an inning of any given baseball game, let alone the commercial-breaks. The dullest sport (next to golf and bowling), with the dullest ads.
 
.....and we score 407 runs on the first day! bring it on you convicts!!!
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And only 182 on the second day... that ain't so fantastic.

Then again, its now stumps and we have to get 107 with 2 wickets to spare... it doesn't look all that great I guess.

Still, theres 3 more matches to go....

That means theres heaps of time for you whinging pommies to crash and burn yet. 😛
 
What I want to know is, where the smeg did the sixth test match go? For decades home Ashes series always had six tests: one each at Trent Bridge, Lords, Headingley, Edgebaston, Old Trafford and The Oval. Now with this mania for getting in as many matches against as many opponents as possible we've had to drop it to five.

The TCCB take arseing, smegging, buggering, sporking note! Ashes summers are holy and sacred! Ditch whoever else the opposition is considered for that summer and let us and the convicts do our thing with no interruptions!

Dr. Bill Kobb said:
Well yeah. That and the whole 'convicts' thing. And the 'put in to bat', and the 'sheep-stealers'. I figured they might be new terms inmates used for horrible acts.

I've been scarred ever since I learned what 'salad-tossing' meant... :xlime:
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"Sheep stealers" and "convicts" being English nicknames for the Aussies, because 99% of the white population of Australia are descendants of people who were forcibly transported to Australia in the days when it was the British Empire's main prison colony. Sort of the Gitmo of it's day.

As for salad tossing, wellthat ain't always Caesar dressing you can see there. :wow:

The Pianist said:
And only 182 on the second day... that ain't so fantastic.

Then again, its now stumps and we have to get 107 with 2 wickets to spare... it doesn't look all that great I guess.

Still, theres 3 more matches to go....

That means theres heaps of time for you whinging pommies to crash and burn yet. 😛
Click to expand...

We always lose at Lords anyway, especially against you gits. It's a given. All-square and three matches to go promises a good series to come. Providing they don't bring Giles back on to bowl at Shane Warne of course. That happens and the crows will all be suffering with stiff necks.
 
BigJim said:
"Sheep stealers" and "convicts" being English nicknames for the Aussies, because 99% of the white population of Australia are descendants of people who were forcibly transported to Australia in the days when it was the British Empire's main prison colony. Sort of the Gitmo of it's day.

As for salad tossing, wellthat ain't always Caesar dressing you can see there. :wow:
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Ha Ha! I know, BigJim! I was just being a prick. :devil2:
 
Hey Bill!..........

....dont talk yourself down so much, you do it better than anyone.
 
red indian said:
....dont talk yourself down so much, you do it better than anyone.
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I only really hate you when you're right...

...which just happens to be quite often. :disgust:
 
😱

THAT... is called Luck.

England wins by two runs. Thats only after failing to get out two tail enders for a good hundred runs.

You were almost beaten by two guys that arn't supposed to be able to bat.



But yeah, you won, so well done I guess...
 
Considering your top six batted like colts I reckon Lee and Kaspy deserved that last fling. And I don't feel a moment's guilt over that last wicket being really not out because you smeggers had two caught behind's yesterday that made me wonder if Rudi Kirtchen has been taking lessons in umpiring from Shakoor Rana.
 
The Sheep Stealers.........

.....are happy to take victories over us any way they can get them, so should we.

What a great advert for the game this test series is turning out to be though! come on lads! you can do it, lets send them home to finish their sentances in defeat!
 
Eighteen years without the Ashes has been long enough, hasn't it?
 
Damn!

There sure are alotta Brits on this board!

I thought you blokes went in for the corporal punishment stuff more than the tickling. Are there any British tickling fetish producers? I'd like to see their take on our favorite fetish. :xpulcy:
 
I guess there is one good thing about it all which one of my friends brought up...

It did mean that we did get 3 days worth of what could've been 1 day cricket. It was fantastic to watch regardless of whether we lost or not.
 
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