Ever wait for an opportunity to tell someone your secret?

waitin2btkled · Oct 19, 2009

Some people come right out with it. I wait for the right time given who the person is, vibes, how well you know them ect.......

Lately, I've been noticing a lot of random people whether jokingly or Stories they heard, bring up bondage, foot fetish or some kink.

I usually jump on those opportunities and tell them how common it is to have a kink. I would usually steer the conversation towards tickling with whatever comes to mind.

When i am asked if i have a kink, i always admit loving bondage and tell them I'm like a big kid, i love tickling. I find that way works best for me lately with mostly positive responses.

My biggest problem isn't so much telling friends or strangers, it is more knowing the average doesn't know what it means to have a fetish. Plus fetish being associated with a negative connotation.

What are your thoughts? Do you wait for the right moment? What conversations work best for you?

texastickler · Oct 19, 2009

I certainly wait until i know someone well. I will only bring it up to others if the bring up some kind of fetish. I am not afraid to talk about my likes though because it is part of who I am. It is complicated but I will tell whoever I can whenever i can. There is a right time for everything in life though. Good post and question.

ticklemepls · Oct 19, 2009

see, im not the same way-

my family and friends actually dont know.... (ok well one of my friends knows about bondage but thats it)... I dont tell them- its better they not know...

Ive seen too much judgement from other things in my life to add insult to injury sort to speak. Its something not everyone understands and wants to understand for that matter- I did tell one person before, and it took me a good 2 years to do it...

Maybe its just me (since I am a chicken!) but I tend to shy away from telling people who are close to me...

Canadian_Eh · Oct 19, 2009

ticklemepls said:
see, im not the same way-

my family and friends actually dont know.... (ok well one of my friends knows about bondage but thats it)... I dont tell them- its better they not know...

Ive seen too much judgement from other things in my life to add insult to injury sort to speak. Its something not everyone understands and wants to understand for that matter- I did tell one person before, and it took me a good 2 years to do it...

Maybe its just me (since I am a chicken!) but I tend to shy away from telling people who are close to me...

I'm the same way! - The only person that "knows" is Daniel. I don't have the guts to tell anyone else, nor do I think they need to know!

red devil · Oct 19, 2009

Apart from my wife I have only told one person. She is an ex work friend and we both said we liked tickle fights and I have texted her and told her I would love to tickle her, I guess she could work it out from that. It was easyer than I though to tell her too but not sure I could tell anyone else.

c7_assassin · Oct 19, 2009

Haven't told anyone, really not comfortable with anyone knowing. I'm not that forthcoming about my personal life anyway. It's no one's business who I'm with or what we do. I like keeping my secrets.

ticklemepls · Oct 19, 2009

Canadian_Eh said:
I'm the same way! - The only person that "knows" is Daniel. I don't have the guts to tell anyone else, nor do I think they need to know!

we share a brain T--- thats why I <3 you!

evilwomanhehe · Oct 19, 2009

Yes. I'm still waiting. I'm generally impatient--except in this matter.

waitin2btkled · Oct 20, 2009

evilwomanhehe said:
Yes. I'm still waiting. I'm generally impatient--except in this matter.

I've known that feeling all to well.

Interesting responses. We help each other out and keep moving forward.

Canadian_Eh · Oct 20, 2009

ticklemepls said:
we share a brain T--- thats why I <3 you!

I <3 you too! 😛 Wow, two of us... NOW people have a reason to be scared 😛

leafstk · Oct 20, 2009

Canadian_Eh said:
I <3 you too! 😛 Wow, two of us... NOW people have a reason to be scared 😛

Quite!

Like most here, I certainly don't pounce on an opportunity to share this "secret". I'm perfectly happy sharing it with the woman I'm dating, if and when it is appropriate to do so... I'm not certain its something my friends and family need to know 🙂

ticklemepls · Oct 20, 2009

leafstk Quite! :scared:

well now ... i wouldnt say that 🙂 T and I .... eh we're harmless 🙂

Marquis De Sade · Oct 20, 2009

waitin2btkled said:
Plus fetish being associated with a negative connotation.

What are your thoughts? Do you wait for the right moment? What conversations work best for you?

Then don't use that particular word. Fetish I mean. Maaaaybe..."kink"? "Your thing"? It's how you say it really, I suppose.

As for the right moment, I've never told anyone I'm not in a sexual relationship with because, well...why? And I don't really say it/tell them. I introduce it as foreplay and gauge whether or not she's reacting to it positively. If she is then that's awesome. If not, there's a whole bunch of other stuff to try. I consider myself lucky that I don't NEED it in order to function.

Coup de Grace · Oct 20, 2009

Ha ha! My secret? Sounds like an episode of Smallville. I've only told one person outside the internet that I have a toe fetish... and I didn't call it a fetish. I said "I have an extreme appreciation for women that take good care of their feet because crusty heels and toes are repulsive." I've never even told my fiance about my fetish although I do let her know when I notice women with French Pedicures.