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Favorite Movie Quotes

"Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate"

Pirates of the Carribean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
 
One of my favorite movies of all time is Real Genius starring Val Kilmer (when he used to be funny).

And still, my favorite quote of all time was in response to his friend asking him what he was doing...

<i>Chris Knight: Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "I drank what?"</i>

-----
Other noteworthy quotes from this gem of a flick include:
-----

Mitch: You know, um, something strange happened to me this morning...

Chris Knight: Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?

Mitch: No...

Chris Knight: Why am I the only one who has that dream?
-----

Chris Knight: So, if there's anything I can do for you, or, more to the point, to you, you just let me know.

Susan: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis?

Chris Knight: Not right now.

Susan: A girl's gotta have her standards.
 
Get your hand off your hip...you look like a Teapot.

From "IN and Out"
 
"Johnny, do you know how to fly?"

"No."

"I want you to keep that in mind whenever you look at her, because if your dick jumps out of your pants, you jump out of this plane."

Con Air
 
"You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together."

"Would someone mind telling me, who are you?"

"And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, 'as greedy as a pig'."

"Well, that's extrordinarily helpful. Now, if you don't mind, could you please tell me, who the fuck are ya, aside from someone who feeds people to pigs."

"Do you know what "nemesis" means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'orrible ****... me."

Snatch
 
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''Cuz' I think that people die sometimes when they don't wanna live no more.'' Rocky v
 
"Do not touch the glass. Do not approach the glass. You pass him nothing but soft paper - no pencils or pens. No staples or paperclips in his paper. Use the sliding food carrier, no exceptions. If he attempts to pass you anything, do not accept it. Do you understand me?"

"yes, sir."

"I am going to show you why we insist on such precautions. On the evening of July 8th, 1981, he complained of chest pains and was taken to the dispensary. His mouthpiece and restraints were removed for an EKG. When the nurse leaned over him, he did this to her. The doctors managed to reset her jaw more or less. Saved one of her eyes. His pulse never got above 85, even when he ate her tongue."

Silence of the Lambs
 
"Enough is enough! I've had it with these motherfuckin' snakes on this motherfuckin' plane!"

Snakes on a Plane.
 
"I hope yo' ass piss the bed with that weak-ass bladder of yours."

"If I do, then I'll put the sheets on you. How ya like that?"

Life.
 
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