How do I cope with less TMF?

[cj22]

I just took the huge step of moving in with my girlfriend. While I'm still struggling internally whether this was the correct move to make, I find I have to sneak in my visits to the TMF. Not to mention being wary of any clips I may want to download, etc. since we'll be sharing this computer now. I know that there are more important things in life than the TMF, but I went about a week without it and now I find myself sneaking around to get on and at least look at clips if nothing else. Its like an addicition. So I ask you all, how do I deal with my addiction to tickling and the TMF when I live with someone that doesn't know about it? Any advice is appreciated!

 

[CrystalLight]

Have you thought about saving the clips to your hard-drive?

You can create a ghost folder with a different name, and then access the clips that way?

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

Not to put pressure on you to do something you may not be ready to do, but have you thought about telling your gf? For me, what pushed me to tell Michael was when we were engaged. I sat myself down and just figured that if this was a man I was going to marry, I owed it to myself and to him to be 100% open and honest with him. It wasn't easy, but it was the push I needed to tell him, and I'm so glad I did!

Maybe moving in together is the push you need to tell your gf? But, if you're 2nd guessing moving in together in the 1st place, maybe not. Your call. Just my 2 cents

Good luck!!

 

[cj22]

Have you thought about saving the clips to your hard-drive?

You can create a ghost folder with a different name, and then access the clips that way?

Yeah I think I am going to do that. What sucks is I'm on a new laptop now and all my clips and stuff are on my old desktop that isn't working now. That just adds to the problem since I'd have to get my old PC repaired to save the clips on there, but I really don't need the computer since I have the laptop. It sucks!

 

[cj22]

Not to put pressure on you to do something you may not be ready to do, but have you thought about telling your gf? For me, what pushed me to tell Michael was when we were engaged. I sat myself down and just figured that if this was a man I was going to marry, I owed it to myself and to him to be 100% open and honest with him. It wasn't easy, but it was the push I needed to tell him, and I'm so glad I did!

Maybe moving in together is the push you need to tell your gf? But, if you're 2nd guessing moving in together in the 1st place, maybe not. Your call. Just my 2 cents

Good luck!!

I've considered doing this, but I don't think I'm ready yet. I don't think she would have a problem with the tickling thing itself, I think she would feel hurt that I have to come on here to get my fix of it. I have a feeling she would expect me to just tickle her and be completely satisfied and while that's an important component of it, it doesn't fulfill everything I enjoy such as the clips and discussion with other "ticklephiles".

 

[baldadonis]

I've considered doing this, but I don't think I'm ready yet. I don't think she would have a problem with the tickling thing itself, I think she would feel hurt that I have to come on here to get my fix of it. I have a feeling she would expect me to just tickle her and be completely satisfied and while that's an important component of it, it doesn't fulfill everything I enjoy such as the clips and discussion with other "ticklephiles".

I agree with Skippy that I think your best course is to just tell your gf. You have already moved in so clearly things are serious. It's not going to get any easier to tell her by waiting and you don't want to have to keep this aspect of your life hidden from her in the long run. Just be cool with her that you like this site because you can talk with other people like you. I wouldn't dwell too much on the clips; that is probably more likely to concern her than wanting to talk with other ticklephiles. You might be surprised that this may not be as big a deal to her as it seems to you.

 

[slap'n'ticklee]

I agree with Skippy that I think your best course is to just tell your gf. You have already moved in so clearly things are serious. It's not going to get any easier to tell her by waiting and you don't want to have to keep this aspect of your life hidden from her in the long run. Just be cool with her that you like this site because you can talk with other people like you. I wouldn't dwell too much on the clips; that is probably more likely to concern her than wanting to talk with other ticklephiles. You might be surprised that this may not be as big a deal to her as it seems to you.

I would've said the same

I will add that if you spend on planning your life with each other, it would be much easier now to tell her about this if you wish to be totally open with her as most relationships should be (in my opinion anyway), how can you keep a big side of you closed to someone you love. You never know she may even be up for it and if she loves you etc then she shouldn't shun you and should listen to what you have to say otherwise, I'm sorry but are you sure you wanna be with someone you can't be truthful with?

 

[ticklebunny 2]

I agree I know it is very tough and very difficult to even imagine or think about sharing this great love and passion for tickling with your gf but you must do this. She does have the right to know-you are living together and you both are very serious about each other. If this is going to be a long term relationship and you both are going to be together for a real long time-you need to be open and honest with her. It may not be as a big deal as you believe it will be.

It all depends on how you introduce and talk about the topic of your love for tickling. You do it in a lighthearted casual way-probably be fine, you don't make a big production out of it-likely things will go fine and smooth and be great. But if you make it a big production-or act like this love for tickling that you have is strange or weird-that is going to likely make her wonder and think the worst and freak out. Again it all depends on how you communicate your love for tickling w her.

I also agree with what some other members said most definitely it would be good and in your best interest to be honest and share with her your love for tickling and having friendships w other forum members. But I would definitely hold off and wait quite a long while before I would ever show her tickle clips, just see how she takes your love for tickling first and go from there. Hope that this helps. Also make sure to let her know that are those that find tickling casual and platonic not just erotic, a wide range-that the tickling that is done is consentual and nothing against the will-guidelines and rules to it-make sure to mention this later on -if ever there is talk about what tickling entails and what gatherings are and so on...when in doubt-also many forum members that can answer your questions and help you along in helping you share your love for tickling-what is appropriate at first to share and what might be too much to reveal and share with your gf at first. Like I said hope this helps. Have a great day.

 

[slacker2114]

If you're not ready to tell her, wait until you are. However, if you try to be sneaky about it, like clicking it off as soon as she walks in the room, it's going to make her suspicious and she'll know you're hiding something. Best bet, if she walks in while on the TMF, just be non-chalant about it. If she asks, tell her about it. BUT don't make it seem as if you're all about pics and vids. Tell her about the other areas of the forum too. Increase your post count in GD, P&R, Sports forum, etc. Tell her you just enjoy chatting with like-minded people, men and women. It'll increase your interaction with the forum itself AND let her know you're willing to be open and honest with her.

As I was typing this, my own girlfriend came home and I put the question to her. She is not really into tickling, but she'll occasionally indulge me. When we moved in together, she knew nothing about my fetish.

Anyway, when I put the question to her, she said it would have to be a trust issue. If she is the jealous type, most likely she'll think you're trying to pick up on someone. However, if she trusts you and you show her trust and are honest with her, she'll have no reason to freak about it. Unless of course, you act suspiciously. My girl couldn't care less who I talk to on here because we have a trust like that. You should work on doing the same.

Not sure if that helps at all, but I can guarentee you if you act weird about it, she's going to have a problem with it. So just be cool about it. And good luck.

 

[Adam]

I say try to work up the courage to tell her, which I know is difficult. Perhaps even see how she feels about checking out the TMF and joining in so she doesn't feel excluded. Since you have moved in together, I see it as something she may well stumble upon anyway. Better to get it out of the way now instead of dealing with uncomfortable questions later, in my opinion. Whatever you choose to do, good luck.

 

[Bugman]

I say try to work up the courage to tell her, which I know is difficult. Perhaps even see how she feels about checking out the TMF and joining in so she doesn't feel excluded. Since you have moved in together, I see it as something she may well stumble upon anyway. Better to get it out of the way now instead of dealing with uncomfortable questions later, in my opinion. Whatever you choose to do, good luck.

Adam makes an excellent point.If she saw this as a place that is about much more then tickling i'm sure it would at least help to put her mind at ease.And who knows,she might just make some friends here.

 

[cj22]

Adam makes an excellent point.If she saw this as a place that is about much more then tickling i'm sure it would at least help to put her mind at ease.And who knows,she might just make some friends here.

Are you trying to pick up my girlfriend? lol just kidding. Thanks everyone for your responses. I'm sure I'll work something out eventually!

 

[Bugman]

Are you trying to pick up my girlfriend? lol just kidding. Thanks everyone for your responses. I'm sure I'll work something out eventually!

No my friend,i'm not a poacher. I do hope you can work things out.

 

[Deadsea7777]

I just took the huge step of moving in with my girlfriend. While I'm still struggling internally whether this was the correct move to make, I find I have to sneak in my visits to the TMF. Not to mention being wary of any clips I may want to download, etc. since we'll be sharing this computer now. I know that there are more important things in life than the TMF, but I went about a week without it and now I find myself sneaking around to get on and at least look at clips if nothing else. Its like an addicition. So I ask you all, how do I deal with my addiction to tickling and the TMF when I live with someone that doesn't know about it? Any advice is appreciated!

Sooner or later she will find out, your taste for this little fetish is probably an integral part of you so either she embraces it together with you or she let you going on your own with your fetish. I do not know how open minded your beloved is, but is going to find about your fetish eventually, specially if you cannot live without the TMF.

 

[Mitchell]

The way I see it, honesty is the best policy. You are apparently very serious with this girl, if you've moved in with her. While one not might be able to tell their partner every little thing, it seems to me as if you are in worse shape, if she ever found out you were on here, and she didnt know about it, then if you just told her straight out. Maybe I'm more open minded, but if I lived with a girl, and she told me: "Mitch, I have X (whatever) fetish." My reaction would be the following: "Okay, honey, thats fine, how can I help, and what do you need from me?" That is called open communication. If, however, I was completely oblivious to her fetish, and I went to the computer one day, and found she had been surfing sex fetish websites that I didnt know about, that would make me upset. Two things would cross my mind. One, why didnt you tell me you have a fetish? Didnt you love and trust me enough to think I can handle it? And two, why do you need to surf a sex fetish website to satisfy your urge? If its something sexual, even a fetish, I'm your partner, your supposed to ask me, and I'm supposed to give it to you, to be compromising, and make you happy"

This is just how I see it. I hope you decide to tell her. Good Luck if you do.

Mitch

 

[Texas_Tickle]

Have you thought about saving the clips to your hard-drive?

You can create a ghost folder with a different name, and then access the clips that way?

Or even burning them to a CD?