"I am a Christian married to an Atheist."

[Tenebrae]

As an Atheist who cannot imagine marrying anything else than a fellow Atheist, I was very interested in this story. Also found it cute

https://www.yahoo.com/news/im-christian-married-atheist-heres-170000627.html

 

[The Internet]

When my mom got knocked up by my dad (who is half-jewish), she went to confession. They didn't give her a hard time for getting pregnant, quite the contrary, they were very understanding and sympathetic.

BUT WITH A JEW???!!! lol. That was the big deal. So funny. "You must stop seeing the Jew at once." lol. Disgusted, she stopped going to church and the whole time I knew her (my whole life!) she was agnostic/atheist. She did marry "the Jew" (half-Jew, actually, Father), though that might not have been a good thing either!

Anyways, here I am! See why we need abortion? lol.

 

[Tenebrae]

Leo I LOVE you! Now all the people who are sitting next to me in the subway are wondering why I am laughing so hard

 

[The Internet]

Leo I LOVE you! Now all the people who are sitting next to me in the subway are wondering why I am laughing so hard

You hear that, Ma? We're a hit! 🙂

 

[milagros317]

When my mom got knocked up by my dad (who is half-jewish), she went to confession. They didn't give her a hard time for getting pregnant, quite the contrary, they were very understanding and sympathetic.

BUT WITH A JEW???!!! lol. That was the big deal. So funny. "You must stop seeing the Jew at once." lol. Disgusted, she stopped going to church and the whole time I knew her (my whole life!) she was agnostic/atheist. She did marry "the Jew" (half-Jew, actually, Father), though that might not have been a good thing either!

Anyways, here I am! See why we need abortion? lol.

Religiously speaking, under Jewish law, there is no such thing as a half Jew. Your father was born Jewish if and only if his mother was Jewish.

Because your mother was not Jewish, you are not Jewish in any percentage under Jewish law.
Your genotype is another matter.

 

[The Internet]

Religiously speaking, under Jewish law, there is no such thing as a half Jew. Your father was born Jewish if and only if his mother was Jewish.

Because your mother was not Jewish, you are not Jewish in any percentage under Jewish law.
Your genotype is another matter.

You know that, Milagros, and I know that......but try telling that to them! 😀 Yeah, in Jewish law, I'm not a Jew. In 1968 Long Island Catholic church......they're not so sure. Like you said, I still have some of that "horrible Jewish blood" running through my veins.

My father's father was Jewish so I have a Jewish last name. She'd be taking the name of a Jew, Heavens to Betsy! Hitler would certainly see me as a Jew. Because of my name, I'm sometimes regarded as Jewish, if you know what I mean.

So yeah, try explaining that to the people who ask me on a regular basis, with a sideways look they don't even realize they're giving me, after they hear my name...."You Jewish?". Believe me, I get the drift, lol.

One time, I went to a wedding with my girlfriend. We needed a ride from the church to the reception and we hitched a ride with this nice older German couple. My girlfriend giggled and told me that they were friends of the family and when they were kids, they had been in the Hitler Youth. I say, "oh great". We get in the back seat. Right away - we haven't even pulled out of the parking lot yet - the guy, in a classic German accent, says my last name aloud, let's it hang there and finally asks (exactly how you'd imagine)...."are you, uh....Jewish?" lol. His eyes darting back to mine in the rearview mirror, lol. I'll bet he scrubbed the backseat of that car after I got out of it 😀

"No, I'm not" (that always sounds great when i say it, lol)

And then ALWAYS as if I didn't know - "because, you know.....that's a Jewish last name." lol. Then I get a look like.....maybe he's denying it or something. 😀 I can't win. If I explain it too much, I look like an anti-semite, if I am too vague, then surely a Jew is in their midst! 😀

It's hilarious, creepy and awkward all at the same time.

(shouldn't this be in the Religion forum?)

 

[mabus]

Since it's not a debate about religious doctrine, just surface level, I think it should stay here. Especially since only like, 10 people frequent the politics and religion forum and no one ever changes
their mind on anything.....

I say, it's no problem when two folks of different faiths marry, as long as both sides always respect the other person's belief.
...and realize, if they are "stupid" because they believe whatever, well, you married them, so you must be as stupid!

Maybe I'm too laid back. I was very attracted to a girl once who was gorgeous, had gorgeous feet, looked great in pantyhose, and was an atheist.
My belief in God is....I HOPE their is a God, so I'm on this weird line inbetween everyone.

I never asked her out because, though good looking, she was a troll, thus not a nice person at all. She's nice enough in real life, the few times I've encountered her,
but online she's rude and ugly, and honestly, no man will ever be good enough for her, ...and then she always bitches about being single..... And if she ever finds a man, all his flaws will be
advertised on Facebook every day so she can get all the white knight sycophant sympathy.

If I found someone who loved me, and I was attracted to and accepted me, well, I'd happily marry a liberal, a Democrat, another religion, even a sports nut!
It's all in the mutual respect. (Half of my good friends think Trump is Hitler, so we just don't talk politics....🙂 )

Also, compatibility is more important than shared belief systems or even interests. If a Catholic guy who loves movies marries a Catholic girl who loves movies, you'd think that'd be a
match made in heaven. But if the Catholic guy has a raging pantyhose fetish, but the girl refuses to ever wear them and calls him a disgusting pervert who needs to go to
confession....(yes, those exist, I've met some that judgemental and more, trust me!) then that's a horrible relationship doomed to either failure, or a lifetime of misery and porn addiction.

On the other hand, if a guy who's Christian and loves movies meets an Atheist who loves sports, you'd think they'd be doomed to failure.
But if he had a raging pantyhose fetish and tickle fetish, and she HAPPILY wore pantyhose all the time for him, and even did her own research and bought her own,
and loved being tickled by him....that will probably end up a lifetime of happy marriage and hot sex.

(Same thing goes for girls in this equation - if the girl has a raging tickle fetish and finds a guy who loves being tickled by her, I doubt that marriage would end because
one of them went to church for an hour every Sunday....)

 

[chicago]

I grew up hardcore Irish Catholic, bf is Lutheran. Im respectful of most faiths though i identify as agnostic.

 

[milagros317]

You know that, Milagros, and I know that......but try telling that to them! 😀 Yeah, in Jewish law, I'm not a Jew. In 1968 Long Island Catholic church......they're not so sure. Like you said, I still have some of that "horrible Jewish blood" running through my veins.

My father's father was Jewish so I have a Jewish last name. She'd be taking the name of a Jew, Heavens to Betsy! Hitler would certainly see me as a JewBecause of my name, I'm sometimes regarded as Jewish, if you know what I mean.

So yeah, try explaining that to the people who ask me on a regular basis, with a sideways look they don't even realize they're giving me, after they hear my name...."You Jewish?". Believe me, I get the drift, lol. ...

Actually, under the 1935 Nuremberg laws, you would have been a "Mischling of the Second Degree." That would have meant restrictions on whom you could marry, restrictions on what schools you could attend, and it would have barred you from many professions, including journalism, teaching, performing arts, and civil service positions. Your father would have been a "Mischiling of the First Degree" with even worse restrictions.

But I do understand your dilemma when asked the question by people after your last name is revealed.

I have the opposite experience. All four my grandparents are Jewish, but Sephardic on my father's side, so my last name is not recognizable by 99.99% of Americans as Jewish. Thus, on occasion, I have been introduced to people with my full name and then heard them continue an anti-Semitic conversation.

 

[The Internet]

Actually, under the 1935 Nuremberg laws, you would have been a "Mischling of the Second Degree." That would have meant restrictions on whom you could marry, restrictions on what schools you could attend, and it would have barred you from many professions, including journalism, teaching, performing arts, and civil service positions.

Oh well that's not so bad, lol. See? I'm not a Jew! lol.

I have the opposite experience. All four my grandparents are Jewish, but Sephardic on my father's side, so my last name is not recognizable by 99.99% of Americans as Jewish. Thus, on occasion, I have been introduced to people with my full name and then heard them continue an anti-Semitic conversation.

It's completely creepy, Milagros, believe me, I am most definitely not one of those people who doubts the existence of rampant anti-semitism. I go through it all the time. And then of course there's the people who DO know I'm not Jewish....and so then feel like it's cool to air their jew-hating bullshit! Hell, even now, half the board is calling us k---es! Don't think they aren't! lol.

I actually never met my Jewish relatives. They disowned my father's father when he married a goy girl.

 

[milagros317]

...
I actually never met my Jewish relatives. They disowned my father's father when he married a goy girl.

That is what the Orthodox will still do, disown them and never speak to them again. 100 years ago they might have mourned for a week as though the intermarrying son or daughter had died.

 

[Flatfoot]

I'm Catholic, and my wife is an atheist. I keep my relationship with God personal. I never liked the idea of trying to "sell" Christianity. She doesn't give me shit about my beliefs, and I don't try to force-feed her my beliefs.

Even though I grew up Catholic, I can't accept without question that the Bible is the Christian technical manual. I wasn't there when it was written. I have no idea if what is written in those books is what God really wants. I regularly pray, but my prayers are very conversational. I figure if God wants me to do something, or behave a certain way, He/She/It will communicate it to me. I don't mean that God will outright speak to me in English, but I do feel that God has communicated to me through past events--things too perfectly-timed to be coincidence. This is how I feel a relationship with God should be--established through personal connection. If my wife doesn't have a personal connection in that capacity, I can't force that, and should never try.

 

[BlasterMaster]

I belong to the church of Optimus Prime. 😀

 

[Tenebrae]

Wow, thank you guys for these replies! I had no idea you would take the discussion into so many different yet interesting directions! It is naturally debatable whether this belongs to the General Discussion or the P&R, but when I created this thread I wanted to be as open as possible and decided to put it here. Some people like my pal Leo are banned there, so there are fewer people. Plus, this thread does not discuss religion per se, but rather its impact on one's personal life, a General topic if any.

Milagros & Leo: The topic of antisemitism deserves its own thread because it is so vast! You are very right about Nuremberg and the criminal little guy with a mustache. The tragedy of the Jewish people is that no matter how hard they tried to assimilate in a given society, even going as far as abandoning their religion and taking Christian names (even converting to Catholicism), there would always be someone to label them an enemy because of their origin. A lot of French and Italians of Jewish origin wrongly assumed that they would be safe following the Wehrmacht invasion of these countries...

My best friend is a Jewish woman. She does not consider herself Jewish, though, even the slightest. She was born to mixed parents (her mother is Jewish, her father Catholic-agnostic), her first name is a Christian one, not a Hebrew or Yiddish one, and her last name very French. She is an Atheist like me, and does not follow any of the regulations, like Shabbat or the Kashrut. Contrary to me, she is very skeptical about Israel and its current policies, but does not meddle because, I quote: "It is not [my] country: I am French, not Israeli." However, she once told me that she keeps in mind that, to some hateful people, she will always be "the Jew", and will be the first to be in danger if said hateful people ever seize power in our country. Sad? Nay, tragic...

Leo: A special thanks for your sense of humor

Flatfoot: I was raised a Catholic, and attended a Jesuit school from the age of 3 to 17. Although I became a staunch Atheist at the age of 12 and have remained such ever since, it is definitely part of my culture and education. I approve your approach of the Bible, which allows for much respect of others' beliefs. But I'd like to ask you a question: how do you reconcile this with your sacred duty to save your fellow man's soul? I mean, Catholics generally believe that they need to actively seek others' conversion. Without forcing anyone of course, but nevertheless they need to act as an agent of God, because allowing others to sin is detrimental to their (the others') afterlife. A man who does not care for another man's soul lacks compassion, and therefore is not worthy of being called a Catholic. Katholikos in Greek = universal. At least that's the way I was taught. As I said, I turned away completely from the faith, for deep reasons that no one here is interested to hear, so I do not judge nor do I seek to challenge you. I am just curious to hear what's your take on this.

ILuvDebonairDamsels: Now that's a church I would like to join! 😛 Where do I sign? Are ex-catholic French Atheists eligible, or do I need to apply for US citizenship first?

 

[Flatfoot]

Well, the best thing I can say in regards to that is that I'll never claim to be a very good Catholic! lol 😉 I'm confirmed, but I haven't been to church since about 2007. I'm not opposed to going, and this is gonna sound silly, but as a parent, my desire to attend Sunday Mass feels selfish when I should be staying home helping with the kids. This is one reason I keep my relationship with God personal.

As far as not trying to convert others, it ties back to how I feel about not wanting to "cross-sell Jesus". Also, I think about how I was taught not to provide "unsolicited" help. If people don't want to be "saved", why become a target of resentment by spending energy trying to sell someone on Christianity? In my mind, salvation kinda sells itself, but I don't feel that I can make another person adopt that mindset. They have to come to those terms on their own. Trying to convert an atheist seems fruitless, because I can't argue the logic many exhibit when denying the existence of a divine entity. I simply choose to have faith in the absence of definitive evidence. What have I got to lose?

 

[Sandisk444]

Perhaps it's because I'm agnostic, but I couldn't give a single fuck about the religious beliefs of my partner as long as it's not affecting our relationship at all. I could date a Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, follower of the flying spaghetti monster woman and be fine with it as long as they respect my stance on the matter and keep me out of it. If it were to come down to "what would we teach the children?" discussion I wouldn't care if we exposed them to religion but I would be for letting them make their own decisions on the matter rather than forcing them do anything, that's how I was brought up and my family was Roman Catholic.

I don't care how you want to teach your children how to not be assholes; whether it be the teachings of a deity, prophet or science fiction novel, just make sure they don't grow up to be assholes. You have literally one job... I guess that's actually two since you have to make sure they survive "growing up" as well.

 

[Tenebrae]

Well, the best thing I can say in regards to that is that I'll never claim to be a very good Catholic! lol 😉 I'm confirmed, but I haven't been to church since about 2007. I'm not opposed to going, and this is gonna sound silly, but as a parent, my desire to attend Sunday Mass feels selfish when I should be staying home helping with the kids. This is one reason I keep my relationship with God personal.

As far as not trying to convert others, it ties back to how I feel about not wanting to "cross-sell Jesus". Also, I think about how I was taught not to provide "unsolicited" help. If people don't want to be "saved", why become a target of resentment by spending energy trying to sell someone on Christianity? In my mind, salvation kinda sells itself, but I don't feel that I can make another person adopt that mindset. They have to come to those terms on their own. Trying to convert an atheist seems fruitless, because I can't argue the logic many exhibit when denying the existence of a divine entity. I simply choose to have faith in the absence of definitive evidence. What have I got to lose?

Well, let me first say that your modesty is truly humbling. Especially for a guy like me who is too often too sure of himself 😛

If you do not mind me saying, I do not think that God has any complaints with you spending time with your children. On the contrary, taking care of one's family is a cardinal virtue, even if it is not said as such in the Gospel (the first Christians were actually encouraged to break from them parents if there was a conflict of faiths). In my view, you are doing a very honorable work by dedicating your time to them instead of dragging them to church. I know many priests who would approve; even the current Pope said he had more respect for those Catholics who take action than those who basically show up to church "once a week and do nothing else the rest of the time".

And I completely agree with your rational view on faith! It is very Pascalian; do you know Pascal? He was that French philosopher who once tried to apply rationality to the question of faith. To him, it was like a bet; I am quoting from memory here, the translation might not be exact: "If God does not exist, then believing in him is of no importance; at the very least it is not harmful. But if he does exist, then believing in Him is of the utmost importance. So either way, I do not lose anything by believing in him, and I may gain a lot, even [eternal life]!". I have a feeling you and him are not in disagreement 😉

"Cross-selling Christ", by the way, I shall use that term again ^_^ The Church actually committed many atrocities in the name of compassion for their fellow man's soul. People got burned, literally. In my view, you are very wise to stay away from such endeavors.

It was a pleasure reading you!

 

[Bohemianne]

^ If I try to relate, I'm in a very incurable stage. 😉

 

[BlasterMaster]

ILuvDebonairDamsels: Now that's a church I would like to join! 😛 Where do I sign? Are ex-catholic French Atheists eligible, or do I need to apply for US citizenship first?

As long as you believe that freedom belongs to all sentient beings and are prepared to aid the autobots in their battle to destroy the evil forces of the decepticons then it doesn't matter what ethnicity, belief, or citizenship you have. TILL ALL ARE ONE! 😀

 

[Sandisk444]

^ If I try to relate, I'm in a very incurable stage. 😉

Well this is going to be stuck in my head all day... thanks for that 😛

 

[Tenebrae]

As long as you believe that freedom belongs to all sentient beings and are prepared to aid the autobots in their battle to destroy the evil forces of the decepticons then it doesn't matter what ethnicity, belief, or citizenship you have. TILL ALL ARE ONE! 😀

Then count me in, bro! <high five> What a delightful throwback to my childhood! 😉