When seeking gainful employment in the tumultuous chaos that is today's Corporate America, it's important to properly interpret corporate jargon. Here are some of the most frequently tossed out clichés and what they really mean:
Competitive Salary
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
Join Our Fast Paced Company
We have no time to train you.
Casual Work Atmosphere
We don't pay enough to expect that you will dress up.
Must be Deadline Oriented
You will be six months behind schedule on your first day.
Some Overtime Required
Some time each night, some time each weekend.
Duties will Vary
Anyone in the office can boss you around.
Must have an Eye for Detail
We have no quality control.
Seeking Candidates with a Wide Variety of Experience
You will need to replace three people who just left.
Problem Solving Skills a Must
You are walking into a company in perpetual chaos. We haven't heard a word from anyone out there. Your first task is to find out what's going on.
Competitive Salary
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
Join Our Fast Paced Company
We have no time to train you.
Casual Work Atmosphere
We don't pay enough to expect that you will dress up.
Must be Deadline Oriented
You will be six months behind schedule on your first day.
Some Overtime Required
Some time each night, some time each weekend.
Duties will Vary
Anyone in the office can boss you around.
Must have an Eye for Detail
We have no quality control.
Seeking Candidates with a Wide Variety of Experience
You will need to replace three people who just left.
Problem Solving Skills a Must
You are walking into a company in perpetual chaos. We haven't heard a word from anyone out there. Your first task is to find out what's going on.
