Jake......01/27/2003 to 02/01/2006....Gone

[lightninbug]

TTD / Ed, if I may call you Ed;

It's like trying to swallow a cement block or a bale of hay, isn't it?

It's ALL-YOU-CAN-DO-NOT-TO-THINK-ABOUT-IT...and it doesn't make any difference. Why does something like this happen to a harmless, Lovely little dog that was full of joy for all & never hurt a soul?

Not that it is going to help at all Ed, but you're going thru the 'grieving process' and you both will continue to go thru it for awhile yet. I'm STILL getting moist eyes, (I'm crying as I type this), thinking about Truman.

I live in a little part of a bigger city that was once it's own little town at one time...we're a pretty tight little community here. Anyway, Truman was the "Prince of the Neighborhood"; everyone saw me walking him twice a day for close to 9 years AND EVERYONE KNEW HIS NAME. Kids, adults, the Mail lady @ the PO, the Letter Carrier...Hell, he got loose & the Guy that reads the Gas meters not only caught him, he knew where to tie him up & left a note saying that "Truman" got Loose...he KNEW Him by name. As did the WHOLE Neighborhood....My name wasn't John, It was "TRUMAN'S OWNER"

After a tumor was removed from his neck & shoulder, we thought he was on the mend, then when he was vaccinated they had a "NEW SHOT w/ 3 yr. Distemper/Parvo Shot...3 weeks later he developed the 1st of MANY SEIZURES, Horrifying to watch, all the more so because he couldn't understand what was happening to him. This went on for close to a year & 3 months.

The evening of Nov. 28th @ 10pm he had a series of Progressively worsening Seisures that lasted from 10pm til 1:30pm the next day...I lost count after 13. I knew what I had to do; I had to HELP Him Die. The Vet's Office MADE A HOUSE CALL...along w/ 2 office staff That Knew & Loved Truman as we did. He was surrounded by those that knew him & was held throughout by the man who loved him. He got the "Pink Needle" @ 2:35 , Nov 29th...his Heart Stopped some 2 min. later and as Dr. Mary said this, a series of HOWLS went up outside... like the rest of the dogs in the neighborhood were saying Goodbye too.

My friend...THIS was close to 2 1/2 months ago and IT STILL HURTS.

You are in the process of honoring a memory & of saying a heartfelt Good Bye to a dear Friend that NEVER wanted you to HURT THIS BAD. It doesn't just go away...it just get a little less gut-wrenching is all. Sometime down the road you will be able to think of your friend w/out tears and maybe a smile will crease your face. You're not there yet but It will come to pass.

Many Love & admire you folks AND All wish you well.
Take courage / take care.
John
aka the lightninbug

 

[isabeau]

awww lightingbug i knew about your dog but not the extent of the suffering involved. pm me anytime also i have lost two pets in my past, to me they were my babies. gone but no way in hell forgotten, even if i do have my chelsea now.

isabeau

 

[desdemona]

Pet loss is such a hugely emotional topic. I'm sorry to say that I deal with it on such a frequent basis that I've almost become immune or numb to it. But there are still those that get to me...

Lightningbug -it's never an easy thing making the call to euthanize. No matter how old the pet or how justifiable, it's still the hardest call you'll ever make (and this comes two years after having to making that decision for my own cat). I dread the moments when I'm asked "how do I know when it's time" or "what would you do if it were your pet" - because we all judge things differently. I'm not the one who sees the pet day in/day out to know what the good days look like. Still, I count my blessings that we have the luxury of euthanasia available to us for our beloved pets. BTW, while I've heard of the new 3 year distemper, we aren't carrying it. We are going with our preferred manufacturer - who is giving us written guarantees of immunity lasting up to 3 years. The whole vaccination issue is just big confusing entity anyway - no way I'm going to only vaccinate a show dog or a breeding bitch every 3 years. I just don't believe in playing Russian roulette.

TTD -the shock factor will take time. To lose one so young and full of life is harder sometimes than losing a companion of 15+ years. Because it seems to senseless. But you know Jake wouldn't want you to mourn like this. I'll say two things - severe trauma like that he probably died instantaneously and without pain. And second, he died as he would have wanted - running and chasing something. Didn't matter what, and boarder collies seldom seem to worry or think about things like the outcome. They just run with abandonment and joy, never missing a step. It does suck that the driver never stopped or made an attempt to find the owner.

I will make this little "endorsement" - dogs that do like to run will. I do recommend having them implanted with a microchip (variety of them out there - go with whatever your vet recommends). My boss's dog - a boarder collie - used to get through his electric fence all the time (high pain tolerance in those dogs). So inevitably he'd get a call from down the street by someone who recognized him or called the clinic with the rabies tag number. But one time, he didn't get the call...and he was left upset and worried. That's about the time he decided if he found him, he was getting him chipped. Obviously, that can't prevent things like what happened to Jake. But what it hopefully accomplishes is that if your dog strays far beyond your neighborhood, even a good samaritan who picks him up will be able to have returned safely to you - best proof of ownership that there is. I reunited a dog with its family in Missouri once when I worked in Indiana - we found the chip when we were xraying the dog because it had heartworm disease. The woman had found it down there while visiting her parents and though she had made attempts to locate the dog's owners, she hadn't had it scanned. But we were able to reunite the dog and its family.

My heart goes out to all of you who have recently (or not so recently) lost a beloved companion.

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

Ed...

Allowing yourself time to grieve (on all of it's levels) is a good thing. We still grieve over Benji too. For us, getting a new furball has helped to relieve some of the emptiness we felt. But, as with you and Jake, we still keep picturing those final moments and wondering what we could have done to change things. I guess we want to think there was something we could have done. Maybe there was. Maybe there wasn't. But, we can't change things now.

We're totally hypervigilant about the new cats, though...being extra cautious about leaving things around that they could get hurt with or choke on, making sure they don't get out, etc. We're reminded of benji every time they do something like he did. And, sad to say, I do compare them to benji at times...esp. when they act up, which he never did. I'm sure there will always be some of that.

The things bug said are very true and well stated. Just give yourself whatever time you need. But, at the same time, don't deprive yourself of the love of a new companion out of fear of losing him/her. When the time is right, Jake will help you find a new friend.

Ann