just for the girls (sorry guys!) ;)

[steph]

I shave my legs,

I sit down to pee.

And I can justify any shopping spree.

Don't go to a barber, but a beauty salon.

I can get a massage without a hard-on.

I can balance the checkbook,

I can pump my own gas.

Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass.

My beauty's a masterpiece and yes, it takes long.

At least I can admit to others when I'm wrong.

I don't drive in circles, at any cost.

And I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost.

I never forget an important date.

You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late.

I don't watch movies with lots of gore.

Don't need instant replay to remember the score.

I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch.

And just cause I'm assertive, Don't call me a bitch.

Don't say to your friends, Oh yeah, I can get her.

In your dreams, my dear, I can do better!

Flowers are okay,

But jewelry's best.

Look at me you idiot...

Not at my chest????

I don't have a problem,

With Expressing my feelings.

I know when you're lying,

You look at the ceiling.

DON'T call me a GIRL ,

a BABE or a CHICK .

I am a WOMAN.

Get it?, you DICK!?!

Now,

you must forward this

to at least 4 FEMALES

or you will have a

HORRIBLE streak of bad love life. Plus it's funny, and all ladies should see this
XOXO

 

[Limeoutsider]

At least I can admit to others when I'm wrong.


And I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost.


You just gotta deal with it, I'm usually late.

I don't watch movies with lots of gore.

Guess I dont fit the description! Very cutem thanks Steph!

 

[steph]

Welcome babe!😛

XOXO

 

[StephanieLocke]

Dear Steph,

Every now and then it's good to have a Girls only moment...


Much appreciated,

Stephanie

 

[steph]

I do agree hon! I hope the Goddess catches it~maybe I'll send it to her! 😛

XOXO

 

[His Divine Shadow]

At least I can admit to others when I'm wrong.

And I don't have a problem admitting I'm lost.

I never forget an important date.

*Cough* I know more women than men with those qualities.😀

Nice find, Steph.😛

 

[steph]

FOR GIRLS HDS!!!!

😉 😛 But thanks!
XOXO

 

[His Divine Shadow]

You obviously haven't seen how many "Just for Girls, Girls Only, Boys Go Far, Far Away" online quizzes I have taken over the years. Girls only means nothing nowadays.😀 😛

 

[natural tickler]

FOR GIRLS HDS!!!!

😉 😛 But thanks!
XOXO

darn sexists..... 😛

 

[steph]

naughty boyz!

 

[ticklkitten]

This is so wonderful! Honestly though, guys DO need to understand that we work very hard to be the pretty eye candy that they adore...

 

[HappyHands]

To all babes, chicks, & girls

So don't shave your legs

Or sit down to pee.

Shop all you want... with your own money

I don't care about check book's

Or pumping of Gas.

Go moe the lawn, and get off your ass.

Beautyies a scam and it's only skin deep.

When I'm watching sports don't utter a peep.

You make fun of hair loss and dare mock jock itch

That line alone would make you a bitch.

I've got no problems expressing my feeling's

It's your sence of timing thats got me realing.

You can do better, that's realy funny

When you find your value by spending his money!

You wouldn't write this poem if you realy were hot,

You'd be out with your man, that you have not.

So stop hating on guys and go look in the mirrior.

The Cause of your problems will become much clearer.

Truth be told Steph, in this day and age, women are there own worst nightmare. They demand to be treated the same, and then get pissed because a guy doesn't pull out there chair. The complain about the skinny models, but there the ones who buy the magazines. The hate that all the actress's have slim waists and big boobs, but would pick Drew Carrie over Brad Pitt as a romantic lead NOOOO! That by the way is what those last two lines are referring to.

Don't hate on all of us just because you've dated losers in the past. Chances are you've had a realy nice guy right in front of you and didn't even give him the time of day. The poem was not Assertive it was BITCHY, and sexist. This all guys start out nice and then become jerks doesn't cut it with me either. Maybe we just don't like you GIRLS always trying to chainge us. If you don't like how we are, then go fined some wimp who'll kiss your ass and hold your purse whil you take 3 hours to fined what you want to were.

Women like you have driven me to give up dating, any desire for marage (and I was actualy hopping to do so one day) or ever having kid. So how do you like that BABE ?

One last thing, you say "don't call me a girl a babe or a chick." yet this very thread is called "For the girls" explain that one.

 

[HappyHands]

I guess I showed them 🙂

 

[steph]

Wow...(wipes away the blood) It was meant in jest, hon. If anything, I love men too much. Anyone from here who knows me in real life knows a) I'm a total kidder and b)I ADORE all the men in my life~I don't give a rat's what they look like or how much money they make, blah, blah, blah. 🙄 In fact, the guy I actually ended up marrying was unemployed when we first started going out 14 years ago. That's how shallow I am.
Feel any better, Major Issues? (Salutes) Find yourself a good therapist, sounds like you need one. And don't worry, I won't waste my time awaiting the apology you owe me for being so HORRENDOUSLY wrong about me~I'm off to polish my favorite Golden Girls action figures...

XOXO

 

[Iggy pop]

What happened to a sense of humor?

 

[steph]

Beats me Igg~especially with one like mine (little hard to miss, eh?) 😛
Sayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...maybe it died with his old screen identity....🙄

XOXO

 

[fttickler]

Ok.. Male here....

First.. I know Stephs humor and love it. Second. After the 4th or 5th mistype or spelling I could not read anymore of Happy's revenge poem. Both were a little funny but I have to make an obvious correction. Happy, based on your nick I assumed you gave up dating and marriage and kid ideas long ago. ( anyone get the joke )

Just my 2.4 cents

 

[steph]

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...Adam, I thank you honey. Really though, with an attitude like THAT, I'm soooooooooooooo shocked he's single. (LYING)
And he wants ME to look in the mirror? (Sneers) Where are his pictures? 🙄

XOXO

 

[fttickler]

Seen yours Honey ( not babe )

and have chatted with you.... You are ALL woman

 

[steph]

Ooooooooooooooo and look at how NOT hot I am...27340 views to pics of just my FEET? Please honey (sniff, sniff) hand me some cheese to go with my WHINE...😀

XOXO

 

[HappyHands]

Apolagize, for what ?

First off the reason I have trouble spelling is because I have a mild case of dislecsia. This causes me to read slower, and (obviously) have trouble with spelling. Next, it suprised me, at first, when some of the guys came to your defence. Then I remebered my own words "...go find some wimp who will kiss your ass, and hold your purse for three hours...". I guess we know who that is now.

As for my "need of a shrink", if I do need one it's because of women who write man bashing poems, and then are suprised when someone lays into them about it. Or maybe it was becuase I was the "nice guy" who spent years hearing girls, babes, chicks, and even women, going on about what jerks there boy friends were/are but wouldn't give a guy like me a second thought.

What it all boils down to Steph is that if a white guy whent out and did a Chris Rock rutien he'd be called a racist for using the N-word, if a gentile goes out and uses some of Woody Allen's old Jew jokes hed be Antisymetic. Were a man to have written the Male to Femal equivalent of what you wrote in your poem he'd be masaganistic.

Now I realise that alot of people will bash my spelling, and polatics on this thread. Wars were fought and people died so you could do so. I am willing to take on the entire TMF if need be, but I will stand by what I have written here today, and what I started in yesterdays post.

 

[steph]

I am dyslexic as well, but it doesn't prevent me from using spell check.

Why would it surprise you that my guy friends came to my defense? I think I'm one of the more liked characters on the board and one of the nicest people I know (I do say that without an ounce of conceit, BTW, I say it because I know it's true and that most people here who meet me, and there are many, know the same thing.) Above all else, they defended me because they knew a) I was goofing around with this post and b) you were wrong~NONE of what you said about me was the truth and if you'd EVER bothered to read any of my posts you'd know that already instead of randomly attacking a total stranger who you've never had one shred of contact with.

And I for one adore nice guys, but you came across as nothing but bitter.

 

[HappyHands]

Ya ok...

If you say so Steph. Maybe I'm bitter because of the double standared with humore on the forum. I am a nice guy, in fact I almost got tossed off the forum for a flame war with a guy named Baron becuase he was dumping on the entir concept of Women tickling Men. All I knew was I read a post that sounded like man bashing, so I stood up for what I thought was right. Had it been the other way around, I'm sure lots of women would have taken the same action.

Why can't I fined you picture on the forum's Members Photo's ?

"When I'm assertive don't call me a bitch." remeber that line in YOUR poem. Don't call me bitter just because I stood up for my own. Plus I can't fuguer out how to use the spell check on the forum.

I'will tip my hat to you for giving a guy a chance when he was down on his luck, I do respect that. I will not oppolgize for rebutting to your poem.

 

[steph]

I frequently post dumb blonde jokes (I'm blonde) and women-bashing jokes as often as I get sent good ones~that's just my twisted sense of humor and all my friends here know it by now. I don't discriminate.

I'm not in members section but there are 3 galleries of me at Ray and Tracy's, which is down temporarily for improvements.

And for the record, I didn't write the poem. It was sent to me by a MALE friend who knows what a clown I am in real life. The point was to be funny, not to upset anyone. So far, you're the only one who found it offensive.

 

[HappyHands]

Are you sure ?

Maybe I'm just the only one who's said anything.