Looking for a friendly advice

[just_ashes]

Ok, these kind of things are not usually a problem in my head, I think i know all the possible answers, and in general, I know it shouldn't be an issue at all. :blush But every now and then (lately specialy) I have these thoughts and just for the sake of having some empaty from people that share my likeness, i would like to read, in case someone has an advice to share, or a similar experience to mine. :huh

Im in a relationship for a couple of years. Everything is fine between us. He's a good man and to say it in few words, we're in love. :wub But the thing is that he is not into tickling or anything related! he's very much normal in what sex life goes. :lol So... i wonder, is this a problem? or would it be a problem if our thing gets serious? (and it's getting serious!) I know I cannot change him. He tries to please me and everything, but i would like him to be into the same things i am.

I don't know sometimes what to think. Anyone around have an advice? I would love to read any suggestion. Thanks in advance and im sorry if this is a common question you are all bored to read. :blush

 

[Volsung1]

I wouldn't think of it as "trying to change him". I would have a talk with him and tell him what you would like though. Is there something that he would like that you haven't considered? It's all about give and take basically.

For me, the fact that my partner wasn't "into it" wasn't a deal breaker. This you must decide for yourself.

No, it's an excellent question of some importance.
Enjoy your relationship!

 

[just_ashes]

I wouldn't think of it as "trying to change him". I would have a talk with him and tell him what you would like though. Is there something that he would like that you haven't considered? It's all about give and take basically.

For me, the fact that my partner wasn't "into it" wasn't a deal breaker. This you must decide for yourself.

No, it's an excellent question of some importance.
Enjoy your relationship!

Thank you for your words.It's indeed a personal decision. Just, sometimes it looks like it's easier to make it. Sometimes the answer is clear adn some other times... well, anyways, it's good to know that im not the only one with that issue.

Let me as you something? If your girlfriend/partner was not into tickling at all (i mean she rejects it) would you stay with her?

 

[MaxDragon]

I have tried to find out how women feel about tickling as early as possible in the relationship so I can end it quickly and with as little pain on either side as possible.

That being said, is he willing to go through the motions for you? Perhaps he will learn to like it when he sees how turned on you get from it.

My wife, who is ticklish and lets me tickle her, enjoys other things as well, and has suggested that I watch some porn and learn a thing or two. I have become interested in whatever turns her on. Perhaps, if he were willing, you could have him watch some tickle vids that can give him ideas.

If he is not willing to try then let him go. Your unfullfillment will only grow and you will eventually end it anyway, or cheat.

 

[just_ashes]

That's when the questions comes: Is he trying to please me or genuinely trying to get inot it? I know this might a superficial aspect of a relationship, but it makes me question if we're lacking of honesty at some things between us.

I apreciate the answers. thank you.

 

[tff69]

When I married my ex wife, she wasn't into it. I found that I was unfulfilled with my sex life. I don't need to tickle every time, but once in a while was fine for me. She would be the ler for me but I could never reciprocate because she wasn't into it. When I opened up to her about my fetish, she didn't like that at all. I told her I was still exploring the idea with tickling in my sexual life. She told me she wasn't into it and she hated doing that to me even because she never got anything out of it. So with that and a bunch of other things, we ended our marriage. I swore from then on, I would be open about my fetish. It took me a while but I found my perfect partner. She is great. Being open is the best policy. Even if it means to break off a good relationship, remember, a better one will come along.

 

[TKLVR181]

That's when the questions comes: Is he trying to please me or genuinely trying to get inot it? I know this might a superficial aspect of a relationship, but it makes me question if we're lacking of honesty at some things between us.

My advice would be to just be honest with him and ask up front. Tell him that it's bothering you! If this is the guy you might be spending the rest of your life with, total honesty is absolutely the best policy. It can be hard, it can hurt, and it can be scary as all hell. But if he's the person who deserves to be with you for the rest of his life, he'll thank you for your openness about an issue that's incredibly personal and important to you.

For the record, I do not think you're being stupid at all. My fetish life is deeply important to me too--not just sexually, but in a cathartic way too.

~K

 

[just_ashes]

When I married my ex wife, she wasn't into it. I found that I was unfulfilled with my sex life. I don't need to tickle every time, but once in a while was fine for me. She would be the ler for me but I could never reciprocate because she wasn't into it. When I opened up to her about my fetish, she didn't like that at all. I told her I was still exploring the idea with tickling in my sexual life. She told me she wasn't into it and she hated doing that to me even because she never got anything out of it. So with that and a bunch of other things, we ended our marriage. I swore from then on, I would be open about my fetish. It took me a while but I found my perfect partner. She is great. Being open is the best policy. Even if it means to break off a good relationship, remember, a better one will come along.

I am happy to read that you now have someone that makes you happy. But im sorry, it didnt work out at first. It's not that im not open about it, i'm just reseved because it's something only few people would understand. In this case, my partner knows it. Always being truth its the best, i agree with you.

It kind of scares know that a marriage can end because sex life incompatibility. I mean, it can happen very often, but we're talking about a one particular taste.

 

[just_ashes]

My advice would be to just be honest with him and ask up front. Tell him that it's bothering you! If this is the guy you might be spending the rest of your life with, total honesty is absolutely the best policy. It can be hard, it can hurt, and it can be scary as all hell. But if he's the person who deserves to be with you for the rest of his life, he'll thank you for your openness about an issue that's incredibly personal and important to you.

For the record, I do not think you're being stupid at all. My fetish life is deeply important to me too--not just sexually, but in a cathartic way too.

~K

:lol Thank you for your opinion. As I said before, my boyfriend know about my tickle interest and he tries to make it for me, but im sure he's not into it. My question, now that I read all the comments above, is: During a relationship you (the girl or the boy) always try to be perfect for each other and always try to accept, be tolerant, open and everything. How much would this last when things got serious, later?

It's good to feel support through this site. Thank you again!

 

[TKLVR181]

During a relationship you (the girl or the boy) always try to be perfect for each other and always try to accept, be tolerant, open and everything. How much would this last when things got serious, later?

If they're the right one, 100%. That's the thing about a relationship--it's just as much about finding compatibility as it is finding compromise.

 

[tff69]

I am happy to read that you now have someone that makes you happy. But im sorry, it didnt work out at first. It's not that im not open about it, i'm just reseved because it's something only few people would understand. In this case, my partner knows it. Always being truth its the best, i agree with you.

It kind of scares know that a marriage can end because sex life incompatibility. I mean, it can happen very often, but we're talking about a one particular taste.

Sadly yes, it can. God knows I tried though.

 

[just_ashes]

Sadly yes, it can. God knows I tried though.

But at the end, you have your reward, right? That's the good part. Thank you for sharing your experience with me. I appreciate it.

 

[tff69]

It's been a while since I was on this site. I returned to tell some of my stories. Thank you for reading!

 

[krev23321]

The real question: how important is your fetish to you? Can you live without it? If you share and he rejects you: is that the breaking point for you?

 

[just_ashes]

The real question: how important is your fetish to you? Can you live without it? If you share and he rejects you: is that the breaking point for you?

I don't think its a breaking point thing. After all, i cannot say this is something that controlls me and its beyond me. But, it was something that bothered me, que question of how can two opossite mind persons woulg get along in a serious relationship. And it was not only that, but there were other aspects to be thought.

But, after a long process, I can say its no longer something that worries me anymore. I found a difernt point of view with you guys in this forum. Thank you so much for your answers.

😉

 

[tff69]

Stay true to yourself! I hope you find or already found happiness!

 

[just_ashes]

Stay true to yourself! I hope you find or already found happiness!

I think I'm on the right direction, and feel much better about it. Thanks for all of your empty, I'll try to stay true.

 

[chicag0]

I can't be in a serious relationship with a person that's not cool with it on some level

 

[just_ashes]

I agree with that. It was something that concerned me. But now things are going much better. Communication is the key.

 

[Volsung1]

I tend to treat this web site as my little escape from reality... course I'm not really pressing the tickling aspect very much in real life.