NEST experiences that weren't so great? (please read - i'm NOT slamming NEST)

[alchemy]

Simple logic

Ok, I hear what both sides are saying...and here's more rhetoric from me.

The reality is, when you have 50 some odd people in one place who are interacting with each other, sometimes you'll get along...sometimes you wont. It's as simple as that. Some personalities will gel, some will not. And since this is mostly an online based thing, some people you meet you'll feel comfortable around and some you wont.
Ok. Now, that being said, I personally had a great time at NEST, but more than that, I was not going to allow myself have a bad time at NEST. I mean, how could you? We're all adults, we can all get along with each other...and not only that, as I'm said many times (and will keep saying), everyone was really warm and cool to be around. I now look at all of you as kind of my extended family. It sounds corny, but it's the truth. If you are cool to people, they will be cool back to you. If someone is acting like a jerk, if someone is treating you badly...FUCK EM. Let them be miserable by themselves. Don't even give them the time of day. Remember, if life is too short to put up with bullshit, NEST is WAY to fucking short to put up with bullshit. Go mingle. Go have fun. Don't let one person ruin your good time.

 

[TickleChgo]

I do want to know if anyone has had any negative experiences at any NESTs.

The valet parking at a certain downtown Philly hotel SUCKS!!!!

 

[TickleChgo]

For me, NEST is just the a reaffirmation of bonds we share. But it's somewhat magical in how those bonds can be made. Whether it's been in posts on the TMF all year, other face to face meetings, different gatherings or venues. NEST is not just a few hours in a club on Sunday, it's hanging out in someone's room, sharing laughs even though you just met a couple of hours ago. It's seeing a loved one for the first time in months or years. It's world affairs conversations over breakfast. It's Monty Python tributes while on a mini road trip for pizza. It's getting lost in Philly. It's cursing motorists while trying to navigate the one way streets. It's silliness while shopping for supplies. It's sweating while lugging cases of food and water up perilous flights of stairs. It's the unasked back and foot rubs. It's unsolicited cuddles and hugs.

Well put, Terry, very well put. Couldn't have said it better, and I wholeheartedly agree.

 

[chicago]

The valet parking at a certain downtown Philly hotel SUCKS!!!!

Ha! This is true.

 

[AffectionateDan]

wow, talk about being on the outside looking in...judging by the words typed and the pics posted, sounds like this was a NEST that shouldn't have been missed. of course, like anyone that hasn't been, i have my reservations...but seeing as how it's so well maintained puts some of my nervousness at ease. i know it can't be 100% foolproof, nothing is, but i'm looking foward to being in philly next year.

Outfreakin'standing!

The valet parking at a certain downtown Philly hotel SUCKS!!!!

Bwahahahahahaha! Foolish mortal!

 

[tickleking]

The valet parking at a certain downtown Philly hotel SUCKS!!!!

Speaking of hotels, as I read this thread I am really curious as to the reaction attendees get from either other hotel patrons, or the hotel staff themselves. Does anyone ever get any questions like, "What the !@#$ is going on in there?!!!"

Thanks,

TK

 

[Knox The Hatter]

Sometimes I have heated discussions here on the TMF, that result in pissing people off. Sometimes I get pissed at people. However, when I go to NEST, I leave all of that behind. My policy is, "what goes at the TMF, stays at the TMF." None of that has any place at NEST. I've never had any difficulties at NEST with people with whom I've conflicted in the forums.

That said, I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later. This year, one person with whom I've debated rather intensely at times decided to bring her resentment of me to NEST. I wanted her to know there was no hard feelings from me, so I tried to strike up a friendly conversation, but she just rudely walked away, saying nothing. I just shook my head, chuckling, and went about my business of interacting with the others. There are far too many cool and interesting people at NEST to worry about such immaturity.

This is true. Drew and I have fought like cats and dogs over all this time, and man, have I gotten angry with him! Enough that I've said things to him that I usually reserve for the most reprehensible of my relatives. We SERIOUSLY don't share world views, as some of you are aware. However, when NEST rolls around, we get along fine, we have good conversations, we have a good time, we put aside the shit. That's what matters...

I'll probably wind up getting mad at Drew again in the future (less likely now, since I very, very rarely go to the P&R board anymore...call it 'burn out'), but nevertheless, we always have NEST to look forward to.

It's a very strange world...

 

[LeeAllure]

When we were wrapping things up

on Monday, there were a lot of people packed in to Jan's room.
The door was open for ventilation, and the sounds of laughter
were evident most of the hallway, despite her room being at
the end of the hall. A non-nest gentleman, just checking in,
was trying to open his room as I was leaving the room. He did
NOT seem too pleased with all the noise, as delightful as it
may have sounded to my ears!

Lee

 

[drew70]

This is true. Drew and I have fought like cats and dogs over all this time, and man, have I gotten angry with him! Enough that I've said things to him that I usually reserve for the most reprehensible of my relatives. We SERIOUSLY don't share world views, as some of you are aware. However, when NEST rolls around, we get along fine, we have good conversations, we have a good time, we put aside the shit. That's what matters...

I'll probably wind up getting mad at Drew again in the future (less likely now, since I very, very rarely go to the P&R board anymore...call it 'burn out'), but nevertheless, we always have NEST to look forward to.

It's a very strange world...

Perfect example. Knox and I both left our differences at home. At NEST we're a couple of long time pals who enjoy each other's company. There's something about the atmosphere at NEST that makes any previous arguments or differences trivial and insignificant. Knox, next year one of us will have to bring some FZ and a boom box!

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

Drew and I, nicknamed the energizer bunnies of tickling, get the occassional odd look from people. More often than not, we get a smile, often envious. When we were at the bar with some of the gang the other night, another couple was watching us tickling back and forth. After a while, the husband started poking the wife. It's contagious!

Actually, a funny tale to tell from this evening. We stopped into Pet Smart for more cat food after going to see X-Men. While we were in line checking out, we were poking back and forth a little. The gal in line behind Drew got this terrified look on her face and backed away a bit. Guess she's not one of us! lol

Ann

 

[lk70]

Perfect example. Knox and I both left our differences at home. At NEST we're a couple of long time pals who enjoy each other's company. There's something about the atmosphere at NEST that makes any previous arguments or differences trivial and insignificant. Knox, next year one of us will have to bring some FZ and a boom box!

I've had my differences with Drew as well. It was cool at NEST because I just took it out on him while he was strapped to the table 😀

 

[Italian_Touch]

how to talk him into thinking this isn't some sex orgy or that the police won't barge in is another thing all together..

Unfortunately, I fear that the stigma can be broken only if you take part to it.
Last night I risked to abruptly end up a deep friendship with a friend of mine, one of the very very few that has an idea of what I am into (I explained long time ago but I think that it ws not fully caught), after incautionally revealing where I have been. I had to call back 24 hours later trying to explain what NEST is NOT, and still this person claims to be "shocked" etc. etc.

I can relate bit keep the faith up and the attitude positive... sometimes the unexpected does happen.

 

[Italian_Touch]

Remember, if life is too short to put up with bullshit, NEST is WAY to fucking short to put up with bullshit.

Ditto, my friend! LOL

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

Wow! I wasn't expecting such a huge response 🙂 Thanks guys for helping put my mind at ease a little 🙂 I'm still nervous and who knows if I'll ever make it to a NEST? LOL But every step is a step forward! Thanks!

 

[DonnieBrasco]

In My humble opinion-lol

I'm still nervous and who knows if I'll ever make it to a NEST? LOL But every step is a step forward! Thanks!

Very True. I have lived my life to this day with the intention of never having to look back at my like and saying " I should have went there or should have tried this" No regrets my friend! Besides,you ever notice someone who reports on their first visit to an event like this usually say "I was wrong in not attending earlier" or "I should have done this long ago I had a blast"

$1.50 says you will be just like the rest of them and have a great time.

Just my three cents,
DB

Whoever has a quote from Danimal in trying to pull someone over, as a sig(whatever you call that thing below your name) had me rolling on the floor !friggin hilarious--now is that true or embellished ? Well, no matter still LMAO!

 

[drew70]

I've had my differences with Drew as well. It was cool at NEST because I just took it out on him while he was strapped to the table 😀

And the whole time, I kept thinking, "She was right...I was wrong...she was right....I was wrong..." 😛

 

[lk70]

And the whole time, I kept thinking, "She was right...I was wrong...she was right....I was wrong..." 😛

ROFLMAO!!!!

 

[AffectionateDan]

Whoever has a quote from Danimal in trying to pull someone over, as a sig(whatever you call that thing below your name) had me rolling on the floor !friggin hilarious--now is that true or embellished ? Well, no matter still LMAO!

LoL That would be Viper, quoting me as we're on our drive out to get that awesome pizza that night. Crappy drivers are a pet peeve of mine, and I can get rather.... creative when it comes to addressing the worst of them.

 

[Babbles]

A very minor point, to very very few....

I'll begin by saying this VERY minor "problem" is precisely what the incredibly considerate organizers of NEST worked so VERY hard to avoid (and succeeded) -- and had I said anything to them, *** they would've taken care of it immediately, but since it really wasn't too terrible I dealt with it myself, not a big deal,
it's just something I hope these very few guys recognize here so they won't make the same mistake in future gatherings, to the point where someone will need to talk to them...

If someone has made it clear they're "just looking" or "observing" please do not ask the person more than 1-2ce to participate rather than just watch.... The point of that label the second day was to avoid hurting anyone's feelings, so it was understood there was nothing personal in any refusal, no rejection whatsoever (not that I anticipated too many offers, but it just made life easier!! 🙄 ) Admittedly when asked only once or twice the thought was appreciated, and yes it was tempting a few times,

but 5-20 requests from the same 3 or 4 guys (only 3 - 4 out of 71? not bad -- & who will absolutely remain unnamed) who either also stood or sat too closely when there was plenty of room (rather than inviting me to do so as others more considerate did) or who followed persistently when I was trying to make a graceful (escape...), hinted repeatedly and/or then made a minor move,
will not only *NOT change my or anyone else's mind, but will most likely simply *ensure that that person will really never be comfortable enough to "play" with you if it appears you don't understand when to quit.

(and I NEVER felt threatened or worried at NEST, btw, and certainly not in organized group settings.)

No means no, leave it at that and don't take it personally!! 🙄 I went due to curiosity, perhaps to meet a very few people, and am simply not into public displays at all -- even private "play" is quite limited, normally to a relationship -- So that's my loss, not yours --

And it was a FANTASTIC gathering otherwise, my other posts are more accurate in terms of overall tone, this was quite a positive, safe experience, even for a single woman travelling alone, don't misunderstand, a warmer group I seriously haven't met!!

(providing one has the "common sense" of course, not to travel outside the hotel alone with no pre-arranged plans, as others have said, or even to allow a stranger into your hotel room -- Never a good idea, though I'm instinctively sure most of the guys I met by far are quite trustworthy -- That's just not something anyone would recommend I'm sure, which is why there are so many group parties in one or two designated rooms...)

I hope that was constructive criticism for the few who (I hope) will see themselves in this message -- Again, for someone a bit neurotic I never felt unsafe, there was SUCH care taken by the fabulous organizers & others that I was always aware there was support if I asked for it --

Just the few who tried to bend or get around the clearly (& repeatedly) stated rules of considerate interaction
need to be a bit more objective about their own behavior, which is never an easy thing
(or I'll just bring a small frying pan next year if I go 😀 )

and btw if I offended anyone myself please PM me! This does also go both ways....
Perhaps I also should've been more direct with these very few guys, with whom I otherwise had some pleasant conversations.


Thanks again to everyone who took such pains to make this quite an overall positive, comfortable, and eventually relaxing gathering of friendly people.

 

[Babbles]

(Ok, I learned ---)

I REALLY hope that last entry hasn't made all the incredibly nice guys I had conversations with self-conscious -- it just figures the many, many, many considerate ones, who either didn't ask at all, or just once or twice,
would read that and be worried... 🙄 when this was just a minor suggestion to a few, and not a big deal to worry about at all

---Next time such a scenario arises, if it does, I'll know to simply be quietly direct with the very few persistent buggers, sorry about that!

Thanks again for a wonderful, safe gathering!

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

I wouldn't feel bad, Babs. It's a good message to put out there. Sometimes people just get into auto-pilot mode and don't think. An occassional reminder is a good thing...even if it does make others check themselves at times. Having enough respect for one another to re-check boundaries on occassion is a good thing. It helps us to grow and reminds those who haven't experienced it yet that safety and comfort are primary.

Ann

 

[drew70]

(Ok, I learned ---)

I REALLY hope that last entry hasn't made all the incredibly nice guys I had conversations with self-conscious -- it just figures the many, many, many considerate ones, who either didn't ask at all, or just once or twice,
would read that and be worried... 🙄 when this was just a minor suggestion to a few, and not a big deal to worry about at all

---Next time such a scenario arises, if it does, I'll know to simply be quietly direct with the very few persistent buggers, sorry about that!

Thanks again for a wonderful, safe gathering!

I remember chatting with a very pleasant woman with the word "Observer" on her nametag. Was that you? Personally, I had no trouble understanding what that meant, and I thought it was a cool way to not have to repeat yourself 40 or 50 times.

 

[Babbles]

Thanks!

Ann & Drew,

Thanks so much for the generous feedback!!
At least one DM has also commented I should've told him/them,
but I really should have done those *very few pushy guys more of a favor by being blunt with them initially, as you're probably right, Ann, they most likely really didn't realize it was a bit much, not thinking...
and I'm sure everyone else is objectively aware they're *anything but obnoxious (!!) 😀

And thanks for the kind comment regarding the effectiveness of that label, Drew; you're right, 98% of the time it worked!! Thanks for making me feel much less

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

Thanks for making me feel much less

Wow, Babs! You look so different standing on your head! Just watch those toes. Too many pods around here. heehee

Ann

 

[Babbles]

Re: toes

Wow, Babs! You look so different standing on your head! Just watch those toes. Too many pods around here. heehee

Ann

Thanks Ann! 😀 Solid advice as usual, though I found out they're really quite safe with this group!! (At least in person... These guys post "dangerously" online, but then all the other talk I've read is true,
they're a bunch of Mushes in reality...)