News About My Mother-It's Not Good At All

[Mitchell]

One other thing I should clarify, that is breaking my heart into a million pieces.

As we all know, in cases of sick patients, and the caregiver, which will be me, and I guess, Hospice, to an extent, if God Forbid my mom becomes too ill to care for herself, things are said which aren't always right. Mom and I made an agreement when she first got this, that we arent going to hold grudges against one another if one of us says something the other doesnt like. I do know she hates when I talk about death, so I'll have to try not to.

However, to my point: Sorry. I asked her either Monday or yesterday "Mom, are you afraid to die?" (Terrible, I know, but as I said, I was crying, and emotional when I said it, so it wasnt intentional). Mom's answer just tore me up. She said "No, I'm not afraid to die. I want to live, as long as possible, but I'm not afraid to die. The thing I'm afraid of most, is saying goodbye to my boy". I know I'm not a "boy", being a man of 40, but you know parents. My grandmother used to say "Girls", when my mom and aunts were in their 40s and 50s, and older than me. When mom said that, I just lost it, and started crying hysterically. I'm welling up even typing it here now. She loves me so much, that the idea of leaving me, just breaks her heart. Whatever shit I've had with my father, etc, I'm so blessed to have a mother like my mom. I told her on this year's Mother's Day card that she was the greatest gift God has ever given me. It's the truth.

Anyhow, thanks again. I really appreciate everyone's support. I will post updates as warranted.

Mitch

 

[TangerineTicklee]

Holistic Links

- http://www.youtube.com/user/GaryNullTV#grid/user/D5D388C9205E1D8F
- http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=0BE4BF387031D40E&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&v=pjhT9282-Tw
- http://www.ted.com/talks/william_li.html
- www.mercola.com
- www.garynull.com

I'm here for you, Mitch. Hoping I can help, giving you support when you need it.


Your friend,

Tange

 

[BMoreTklr]

I'm so saddenned to hear this news. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Times are tough but try to remain strong for your mom and you can both fight this thing together.

 

[Mitchell]

Hi Tange,

Thanks for the links. I'll look into it.

Thank you for your good wishes, BMore. I know I have to be strong for my mom, and believe me, she and I will fight this thing together, no matter what happens.

Mitch

 

[TangerineTicklee]

Hi Tange,

Thanks for the links. I'll look into it.

Thank you for your good wishes, BMore. I know I have to be strong for my mom, and believe me, she and I will fight this thing together, no matter what happens.

Mitch

You are most certainly welcome.

 

[venray]

Yesterday I went with my mom for a visit to the cancer doctor. She had taken three tests in March, to determine the status, and course of treatment, of her non-small cell lung cancer, and the news we received was very grim.

My mother has metastsized cancer in both of her lungs, and a suspicious lump on her breast, that will need to be biopsyed. The doctor told us that lung surgery, which is usually his first course of treatment for his patients, is now not an option, because there are tumors in both lungs, and he only does surgery if the tumors are localized in one lung. He said the only option is chemotherapy, once a week, three hours a day. When my mom asked him if she was going to die, the Dr was kind, but honest. He said that about 85% of his patients die from mestastisized lung cancer within two years. He also said that she must have chemotherapy immediately, or she will be gone before the end of 2010. The Dr did say that if the chemo is successful in shrinking the lung tumors, he may be able to do surgery down the road.

Mom pledges that she is going to fight to the end. I'm emotionally preparing myself for the worst. Whatever happens, I just don't want her to suffer. Supposedly, the Dr told her that metastatic lung cancer, is not a "suffering cancer", whatever the heck that means.

As I've posted before, what makes this situation doubly difficult is my situation with my father. With each piece of terrible news my mom and I receive, it seems the news for him gets better, because, as I've posted before, he just can't wait for her to die, so he can best figure out how to spend her alimony check on his wife and himself. When I e-mailed him last night to tell him the terrible news we got from the Dr, he didn't even reply.

We plan to begin chemotherapy here, but my mom is also going to get a second opinion from a Dr in NJ who my aunt had seen on TV.

Right now, the situation looks very grim. Mom is devestated, I'm devestated, and we're both physcially and emotionally exhausted. The scary part is: She doesn't even seem sick. She's not coughing blood, and hasn't lost any weight, although the Dr did say the blood could start again at any time.

So, thats the story. She should make it through 2010 with chemo. 2011, we aren't so sure. I know we have to take life one day at a time.

Any support would be appreciated. Thank you to all those who have reached out to me so far.

Mitch

I am with you brother....you are both in our prayers.....Keep the faith...

 

[Mitchell]

Thanks, pal. I appreciate the thoughts.

Mitch

 

[giantfan121262]

Mitch. I am so sorry to hear this about your mother. I am glad she is getting a second opinion. I recall bugman made a comment about Sloan Kettering. They ARE the best. My mom was there a year ago and the whole staff was fantastic. It might be worth your while to check them out. I live close by if you want some support

 

[Mitchell]

Thanks, giantfan. I appreciate the support. I'll discuss with my mom about looking into Sloan Kettering.

Mitch