Non-Jokes!

[tickler118]

Okay I'll start and hopefully everyone gets the idea.

'A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic whose drinking problem is tearing his family apart.'

Another:

"Knock, knock"
"Who's there?"

"It's the police, your husband has died in an accident. We need you to come and identify the body."

You get the drill, make them so non-funny that they are funny!

 

[RobAce]

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. Then its firebombed by protesters.

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A young girl buys an ice cream cone. On the way home she walks into traffic and gets run over by a semi.

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A man and a woman were married for 50 years, then their son moves back in with them and kills them both.

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I am assuming I get the nature of the thread.

Rob

 

[Fluffie]

What do you call a dog crossed with an owl?

You don't, you know bird genes and dog genes could never cross in such a way to form offspring.

How do you drown a blonde?

Hold her head underwater until she stops breathing.

 

[RobAce]

A man is rushed to the emergency room with a nail in his penis. The doctor there makes a mistake and the man bleeds out and dies.
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A blonde and brunette go into a bakery. They are kidnapped and assaulted, then dropped off in the desert with no hope of rescue.
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A farmer goes out into the field because he sees a giant beanstalk. Then suddenly a tornado comes out of nowhere, sucks up the farmer and tosses him 2 miles on a roof where he dies slowly.
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Rob

 

[Fluffie]

A elderly couple's car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. They didn't have any family so no one came for them and they died.

A man is walking through the forest when he is approached by a talking rabbit. Assuming he's finally gone schizophrenic he shoots himself.

 

[Evil Dave]

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk in to a pub. Something happens and the outcome is humorous.

 

[Filthyweasel]

At the very bottom of a treasure chamber in darkest Arabia, a young boy finds a golden lamp. As he rubs it's beautiful surface, a booby trap opens beneath his feet and he is impaled on spikes.