Okcupid.com is where I found her!!

[leaf001]

Yes as the title states I found a good intelligent women on okcupid. And she likes being tickled....during sex.....BAZINGA!!!! Sad part is I am in a relationship with another women, both know nothing of the other. I don't know what to do about this haha!

 

[Candygirl]

I'd say you are a true catch, and that either woman would be lucky to have you.

HAHA Joking aside, yeah first of all, how about, not look for women on Okcupid while you're in a relationship??!!
The fact that you referred to "being in a relationship already" as a sad thing, makes me think that you aren't happy in said relationship anyhow. I'd say pick one, and ditch the other. Plain and simple. You obviously aren't happy with the first one, hence why you refer to it as "sad" and are looking for others in the first place. It sickens me, but such is life, and unfortunately, such are men like you. I do hope that whatever decision you make works out well for you. I'm sure that stringing them both along will go extremely well and you'll never have either of them find out about the other as nearly every other guy who has tried the same thing. But good luck

 

[Jagermeistered]

So, the girl you were with before Okcupid.com, is doing nothin' for you? Umm, break it off with that girl, NOW! Unless, they are both bisexual... But, I doubt that is the case, right? Do not try to fake monogamy with a partner who thinks the two of you are exclusive. Is the first girl wealthy, and your with her for the money?

Give us more details...

 

[leaf001]

Its a tough one, and this is the first time I've ever done something like this. I used to feel the same as you " Candygirl" when I'd hear about such things, but what am I to do if my current G/F and I haven't had sex in almost two years....or it will be come November.

 

[Jagermeistered]

I'd say you are a true catch, and that either woman would be lucky to have you.

HAHA Joking aside, yeah first of all, how about, not look for women on Okcupid while you're in a relationship??!!
The fact that you referred to "being in a relationship already" as a sad thing, makes me think that you aren't happy in said relationship anyhow. I'd say pick one, and ditch the other. Plain and simple. You obviously aren't happy with the first one, hence why you refer to it as "sad" and are looking for others in the first place. It sickens me, but such is life, and unfortunately, such are men like you. I do hope that whatever decision you make works out well for you. I'm sure that stringing them both along will go extremely well and you'll never have either of them find out about the other as nearly every other guy who has tried the same thing. But good luck

We are on the same chapter, Skirts. Why are you wearing pants though 😛

 

[Jagermeistered]

Its a tough one, and this is the first time I've ever done something like this. I used to feel the same as you " Candygirl" when I'd hear about such things, but what am I to do if my current G/F and I haven't had sex in almost two years....or it will be come November.

A girlfriend for two years, and your not happy? Waiting for November?

What about July, August, September, October?

Well, at least your not married...

 

[Candygirl]

We are on the same chapter, Skirts. Why are you wearing pants though 😛

Glad to see we can agree on some things 😛 And you haven't returned my skirt yet, sissy boy.

But yeah, you haven't had sex for almost 2 years...and you're upset about it. You have 2 options. You obviously aren't happy. So either 1) Keep stringing her along until she finds out about "OKCupid girl and leaves YOU once she finds out the kind of guy you are...or I'm sorry, have become. Or 2) Talk to her. Straight up. "Hey, babe. I don't know if you have noticed, but we haven't had sex in like forever. Is there a reason for this?"

I think honestly though, you are trolling us or intentionally leaving out some key information about girl 1 here. You have been together longer than 2 years, are not married, and not having sex anymore. Are you sure she's still into you?

 

[leaf001]

HAHA! I've said too much already, she's also moving back home and understands that I don't want make the move, which would end our relationship. In a relationship sex is a big part of it, we just don't do it anymore, almost as if its normal? I have needs so I did what any guy would do I assume.

 

[Candygirl]

HAHA! I've said too much already, she's also moving back home and understands that I don't want make the move, which would end our relationship. In a relationship sex is a big part of it, we just don't do it anymore, almost as if its normal? I have needs so I did what any guy would do I assume.

I would actually have to agree with some of that. That would be a deal breaker with the move, and sex IS a big part of a relationship, however, and of course I can't speak for men because I am not one, but I do NOT agree that any guy would do the same. If they cared for her and wanted to continue the relationship, they'd talk to her about it, not try to find some side piece. And if they didn't see the relationship going anywhere, they'd end it. At least, smart and honest guys would anyhow.

I can't at all believe that most guys would go without sex for two years, and still be with the girl, or pretending to be as you still are. And FYI genius, "A guy has needs" is never a valid point to argue when you're cheating on your girlfriend. As "most guys" I'd hope would agree.

 

[TJDoom]

I can't speak for most guys as I can only account for one but, yeah, communication is essential regardless of circumstances. If this is misleading bait to stir people or completely true, trying to stick it to someone behind their back is unbecoming. How could you expect a new relationship to go swimmingly if you let things go so long when it's clearly not on the up and up?

 

[leaf001]

I don't agree, after two years it would be hard for any man to stay with a women without sex in the relationship. I don't think one's intelligence had anything to do with it. Honesty yes, but mind you the "pretending" only started a month ago, around the time she mentioned leaving. Which she will do in the middle of July. Actually I don't feel bad anymore, she's leaving, no sex for two years, and I found someone that excites me again....she should understand how I feel not the other way around, I've done my part. If I am looked at as an asshole then that's what I am I'll rep it.

 

[Jagermeistered]

I don't agree, after two years it would be hard for any man to stay with a women without sex in the relationship. I don't think one's intelligence had anything to do with it. Honesty yes, but mind you the "pretending" only started a month ago, around the time she mentioned leaving. Which she will do in the middle of July. Actually I don't feel bad anymore, she's leaving, no sex for two years, and I found someone that excites me again....she should understand how I feel not the other way around, I've done my part. If I am looked at as an asshole then that's what I am I'll rep it.

So, you two were just living together for money, and not because you were in a relationship? Why not just think of her as a roommate?

 

[Candygirl]

She SHOULD understand how you feel. But you'd have to actually be a real man and tell her first, and therein lies the problem. I'm happy for you that you found someone. And the intelligence I was referring to earlier was saying that a smart man, if not happy in his current relationship, would either talk to her as to why, or he'd end it.

So then my question is, you seem to have it all figured out. So why post the thread in the first place saying that you didn't know what to do, when you clearly already had your mind made up?

 

[TJDoom]

I think any advice being given to you is for the future. A union works when you're open. I dunno about you, sir, but something is wrong a lot longer than a month if no relations are had for two years. That takes a duo to accomplish so you both could've done something more. Been more honest. So doesn't it make sense to learn from that and be more upfront? If you put it all on someone else and repeat the same mistakes expecting a different result, someone once said that is classic insanity.

I do hope the new path goes better.

 

[ticklishbod20]

Commented on wrong thread ... Disregard.

 

[FLBowler]

Personally regardless of the points you've said up to now. You are in a relationship. You'll lose both girls so quick once they find out. You bring up no sex as a reason, but later on you state that it started once she said she was moving. So either you're making it sound like you're right based off reactions or just keep piling things on. Break up with the current girl and stArt working on the new girl. It's great you guys can share the tickling, but if after 2 years of "settling" you can't justify cheating and wrong doing two girls because she wouldn't have sex with you or as you stated is moving. Even if the second girl didnt exist it's silly for both of you to continue this dying relationship until the literal day she leaves.

 

[FootballGuy]

I feel for you Leaf.

It's difficult to explain how hard it is for guys with this fetish. I'm not saying that the girls don't have their own issues but for every girl into tickling there are like 7829718 guys (slight exaggeration 🙂). If by some miracle we actually find a girl who 1) is into tickling and 2) likes us, it's like hitting the lottery and being struck by lightning all at once.

It's sort of tough to ignore that kind of good fortune.

I don't blame Leaf for at least pursuing the girl from OkCupid but CandyGirl is right, you have to tell your current girlfriend that it's over. It seems like that should be pretty easy to do based on what you've said.

 

[Candygirl]

You girls will never truly understand how hard it is for guys with this fetish. I'm not saying you don't have your own issues but for every girl into tickling there are like 7829718 guys (slight exaggeration 🙂). If by some miracle we actually find a girl who 1) is into tickling and 2) likes us, it's like hitting the lottery and being struck by lightning all at once.

Well, SINCE you're going there, the same can be said by both genders. And we understand that only too well. You are right about the ratio, though. So on the opposite side, for every girl into tickling, there's 7,829,718 guys (stealing your own exaggeration 😛 ) who treat us just like that. "ZOMG SHE LIKES BEING TICKLED!??? " And only focus on that one aspect and act like we are some fetish playtoy instead of taking the time to get to know us in the first place. Now, while I completely understand that most guys are most likely just here to get a few fetish rocks off before work, the ones who are on here looking for a connection have it rough because the rest of the guys who act like what I just mentioned, make it hard for them. At least that's what I have noticed. I have to weed through 100 or so douche bags and jack asses who approach me in the chat room to even find one that I wouldn't mind talking to again. It's NOT that difficult really if you guys take a minute to breath and collect yourselves before you talk to us. And I am not at all saying you have to spend hours "getting to know each other and your feelings" or all that bullshit just to have a conversation about tickling, but talking to us like we are a real person would be a great help. And I'm speaking of the men folk in general around here, not you or anyone particular.

 

[chicago]

To be fair, just because the ratio of males to females are highly skewed here, doesn't mean that's necessarily the case in real life.

I have never met a dude that was into tickling the way I am anywhere aside from within this community. Not like tickling fetishes are a dime a dozen. Not like vanilla dudes really "get it" even if they are willing to indulge.

No matter who you are, getting what you want out of life takes work. The things that are worthwhile are the ones that AREN'T easy.

Hurting your current girl because you don't have the balls to tell her straight up "I don't feel satisfied in this relationship. I met someone else," is really shitty, selfish, and cowardly. There's nothing wrong with how you feel right now, but be a man. Do the right thing. You'll feel better about yourself in the long run.

And if you don't? Expect shit to blow up in your face. What goes around comes around and all that.

 

[maniactickler]

Have your cake and eat it to!

 

[GQguy]

I'm curious. How did you find this girl on OkCupid?

 

[CuteJill143]

Look, you can't have your cake and eat it too. You might feel comfortable with your girlfriend now since you've been with her for 2 years, which might make things sad. If you have a girlfriend and also on a dating site, how happy are you really in your relationship with her? I am sure you must care for her very much but you probably feel that there's something missing. Sometimes we have the habit of staying in a relationship with what is familiar and comfortable to us. You need to ask yourself what is best for YOU and what will make YOU happy. Our opinions on the forum might guide you but the final decision is up to you. You need to ask yourself what you want to do. If you go with both of these women lying to both them, you will lose both of their trust and have no girlfriend, only a matter of time before the truth comes out. It's not nice to start over.

I am not one to talk though. I have been guilty of being on sites looking for people into tickling while in relationships but it was because I wasn't happy dating vanillas.

 

[CuteJill143]

Its a tough one, and this is the first time I've ever done something like this. I used to feel the same as you " Candygirl" when I'd hear about such things, but what am I to do if my current G/F and I haven't had sex in almost two years....or it will be come November.

No sex in 2 years? No wonder you are on dating sites.

 

[CuteJill143]

Sex is very important in a relationship. I love this quote from a TV show that I love.

"How do you sustain a relationship without the zsa zsa zsu?" Sex and the City.

 

[FootballGuy]

So on the opposite side, for every girl into tickling, there's 7,829,718 guys (stealing your own exaggeration 😛 ) who treat us just like that. "ZOMG SHE LIKES BEING TICKLED!??? " And only focus on that one aspect and act like we are some fetish playtoy instead of taking the time to get to know us in the first place.

Ah so true and excellent point! (oh and nice steal on the exaggeration for extra effect 😀)

Now, while I completely understand that most guys are most likely just here to get a few fetish rocks off before work, the ones who are on here looking for a connection have it rough because the rest of the guys who act like what I just mentioned, make it hard for them. At least that's what I have noticed. I have to weed through 100 or so douche bags and jack asses who approach me in the chat room to even find one that I wouldn't mind talking to again. It's NOT that difficult really if you guys take a minute to breath and collect yourselves before you talk to us. And I am not at all saying you have to spend hours "getting to know each other and your feelings" or all that bullshit just to have a conversation about tickling, but talking to us like we are a real person would be a great help. And I'm speaking of the men folk in general around here, not you or anyone particular.

Yeah we have it really rough because we normal dudes have to differentiate ourselves from the weirdos who think it's perfectly normal to send PMs like: "Me like u plz send pics of feet and how ticklsh they r thx".

And like you said, half the battle is just getting your PM read.

As one example, a girl on here told me to PM her so I did but I never heard back so I resent it several days later (and only because she had asked... don't get any ideas guys lol) and she was like "oh what took you so long?" lol. Her inbox was so full of garbage, she never even got to read the first PM.