I'm in a committed relationship with a girl I love very much. She is ticklish, and enjoys when I tickle her so our physical relationship is just about perfect for both of us. The thing is, it isn't a fetish for her, so she doesn't view it the same way. I joined this site because I wanted to talk to like-minded people, but I feel like it's cheating to even read posts. Can anyone offer some opinions?
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Opinions please?
- Thread starter goalie34
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2001
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- 14,285
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I'll start with the easy part.
You have a partner who is willing to indulge your fetish as part of sex play. No, it is not a turn on for her like it is for you. But she IS enjoying the fact that she is pleasing you.
This is a perfect example of a working healthy sexual relationship. You do things for each other that might not be at the top of your own turn on lists because your partner likes and enjoys it. I'm sure there are some things that you do for her that are not bulls-eyes to you, but you enjoy seeing her enjoy herself. Right?
The second part is a bit harder.
You want to talk with folks that share your likes, in short to communicate with folks who are like minded. As this is an aspect of your sexuality, you seem to be feeling that sharing it with anyone other then your partner is a breach of the relationship. This is also normal. (Both the desire to communicate with people like you, and the guilt)
How to best address that guilt is more complicated and depends on a lot, starting with how your GF feels about outside sexual media and such.
Myriads
You have a partner who is willing to indulge your fetish as part of sex play. No, it is not a turn on for her like it is for you. But she IS enjoying the fact that she is pleasing you.
This is a perfect example of a working healthy sexual relationship. You do things for each other that might not be at the top of your own turn on lists because your partner likes and enjoys it. I'm sure there are some things that you do for her that are not bulls-eyes to you, but you enjoy seeing her enjoy herself. Right?
The second part is a bit harder.
You want to talk with folks that share your likes, in short to communicate with folks who are like minded. As this is an aspect of your sexuality, you seem to be feeling that sharing it with anyone other then your partner is a breach of the relationship. This is also normal. (Both the desire to communicate with people like you, and the guilt)
How to best address that guilt is more complicated and depends on a lot, starting with how your GF feels about outside sexual media and such.
Myriads
Thanks for the reply, it was very helpful. I think I'll talk to her about it, as she's very understanding and would know that I'm not looking to meet anyone in person, or even get into any online "sex." All I want is to garner opinions, and enjoy conversation with people who share my own opinions.
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2001
- Messages
- 14,285
- Points
- 48
If you feel she will be fine with it, then openly talking about being on the forum (and even showing her the sort of discussions you want to have via older threads) is an excellent choice.
Mostly you don't want to feel alone in your likes. And the forum is a place that helps one beat that.
Myriads
Mostly you don't want to feel alone in your likes. And the forum is a place that helps one beat that.
Myriads
