Headsnap
1st Level Orange Feather
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2004
- Messages
- 2,185
- Points
- 0
Today I was out and about driving around the various shitty non-roads of Scotland delivering shite to people when a rabbit (or some form of small creature) jumped out in front of my van. Invariably the thing got squashed flat, and I would simply have carried on driving unperturbed if I hadn't heard a thud from the belly of the van which made me stop to check the stupid little beast's entrails hadn't flown up and damaged anything. A car pulled in behind me as I stopped and the driver, some southern English twat with the look of a university lecturer who reads various arcance tomes when he isn't lecturing or hill-walking approached me and asked me why I didn't brake to avoid killing the beast. I explained the situation to him; I was going 55mph, the thing appeared on the road two feet from the van as I came off a bend, and he was about two feet from the back of me. If I'd braked to avoid killing the rabbit/ weasel/ whatever that pile of hairy flesh used to be he and his ugly wife and their hyperactive child who looked as though his name was Tarquin or Forrest would probably have ended up as smushed as the poor creature was as their car rear-ended me at speed. Three humans > one rabbit-thing. He was unhappy with this rationale; apparently if I wasn't "speeding" I would have been able to brake and the rabbit would still be alive. At this point I got bored and told him to get back in the car and fuck right off, so he took the number from the side of my van and rang my boss who assured the by-now apopleptic man that disciplinary action would be taken against me. I laughed at him and he left, wagging his finger and shaking his head, and as the car left both him and his wife were yammering between themselves and taking turns to give me the Evil Eye as the kid sat nervously in the back. Then my mobile rang; it was the boss, surely ringing to inform me of my imminent dismissal for the heinous murder of a small woodland creature and the cold-blooded contempt I had shown to it's champion! Er, not quite. The conversation, pretty much as it happened:
Me - "Hello."
Boss - "I've just had a complaint from a Mark Somethingorother; he says you ran something over and swore at him."
Me - "I did, a rabbit, and I told him to fuck off because he moaned about it."
Boss - "Oh right. What a twat he is. Don't forget to pick up the black puddings in Inverness on the way back." *Click*
This little scenario has left me with a few profound queries. First of all, who gives a fuck about a rabbit to the extent they are willing to stop their car whilst obviously on their holidays and lambast a delivery driver for killing one? If he was some sort of Rabbit Protection Officer out on Rabbit Protection Patrol then fair enough, but he wasn't. He was obviously up in the Highlands on holiday, and thus wasted a good four or five minutes of his holiday moaning at me over absolutely nothing. Secondly what did he think the upshot of his confronting me was going to be? Did he think I was going to break down and scream to the skies for forgiveness over the death of the rabbit-pile? In a society where an 11-year old kid can be shot for wearing the wrong football colours what possible good did he hope to achieve by bothering me over something so fucking stupid? I don't blame him for ringing my boss to complain about me swearing at him (actually I do, I think anyone who is offended by collections of syllables and letters needs to get a grip of themselves, but I can empathise with that as a legitimate 'complaint') however he opened with "One of your drivers has just killed a rabbit, and not only does it not seem to bother him but...". Did he think my boss was going to care any more than I did?
What about you people; would YOU stop your car to moan at a delivery driver for killing a rabbit? And if you did, are any of you naive enough to expect anything but a mouthful of abuse? Was my response over-the-top, or is it right to give people short shrift if they bother you over trivial bullshit? Opinions welcome, sirs!
Me - "Hello."
Boss - "I've just had a complaint from a Mark Somethingorother; he says you ran something over and swore at him."
Me - "I did, a rabbit, and I told him to fuck off because he moaned about it."
Boss - "Oh right. What a twat he is. Don't forget to pick up the black puddings in Inverness on the way back." *Click*
This little scenario has left me with a few profound queries. First of all, who gives a fuck about a rabbit to the extent they are willing to stop their car whilst obviously on their holidays and lambast a delivery driver for killing one? If he was some sort of Rabbit Protection Officer out on Rabbit Protection Patrol then fair enough, but he wasn't. He was obviously up in the Highlands on holiday, and thus wasted a good four or five minutes of his holiday moaning at me over absolutely nothing. Secondly what did he think the upshot of his confronting me was going to be? Did he think I was going to break down and scream to the skies for forgiveness over the death of the rabbit-pile? In a society where an 11-year old kid can be shot for wearing the wrong football colours what possible good did he hope to achieve by bothering me over something so fucking stupid? I don't blame him for ringing my boss to complain about me swearing at him (actually I do, I think anyone who is offended by collections of syllables and letters needs to get a grip of themselves, but I can empathise with that as a legitimate 'complaint') however he opened with "One of your drivers has just killed a rabbit, and not only does it not seem to bother him but...". Did he think my boss was going to care any more than I did?
What about you people; would YOU stop your car to moan at a delivery driver for killing a rabbit? And if you did, are any of you naive enough to expect anything but a mouthful of abuse? Was my response over-the-top, or is it right to give people short shrift if they bother you over trivial bullshit? Opinions welcome, sirs!
to myself....the blood and guts you see make the pudding black...o ackkkkkkkkkk it's the meds it must be...
