Despite the ills of mankind and the troubles which plague so many people the world over, I am freaking out over an ingrown toenail. I will be going to a podiatrist tomorrow (September 16th) to have it surgically removed.
Now, I am no stranger to pain. My threshold for pain is incredibly high. When I decided that I wanted to call a doctor, I knew that the pain was bad. I can tolerate a lot of pain... This I couldn't tolerate. (Hell, I've been hit squarely in the face with a baseball bat! It hurt.. but I was ok!)
Naturally, my "friends" all offered horror stories about how terrible a procedure it is, and how painful the recovery will be. A few told me that the pain I am in now is far worse than anything I'll be feeling tomorrow. That made me feel a little better.
I have had more severe surgical procedures performed on me than severe ticklings! (sadly, much more) So the trepidation I'm feeling isn't over the procedure. I pretty much know what it will entail, and I also know that I will be in no danger during this simple outpatient procedure. The thing that worries me that most is the fucking needle! As I said, I can tolerate pain, and I don't complain when I'm uncomfortable, but I have a terrible phobia of needles. At the dentist, I never get novocaine. I just changed dentists, and the new guy wanted to give me a filling, so he took out his drill, and took out his needle. I told him no needle, just drill. Well, he looked at me like I had lost my mind. But, he said that if I refused novocaine, he had to honor that request. He drilled the hell out of me, all the while wondering what I was feeling. I was feeling intense pain, but I could handle it. I couldn't handle that needle.
Now, this foot surgery will require local anathaesia. I know this. I won't be able to endure the toe torture without it, but that damn needle is just going to be unpleasant. Just do me a favor and think kind things for me at 3:30 tomorrow.
Now, I know what some of you are thinking: Jeez, kid, mellow out! It's just an ingrown toenail! There are people suffering out there, and you're freaking out over a little needle. To that metaphorical slam, I say: "tough".
Anyway, Phatteus will soon be up and active again. I can only hope that the recovery is as quick as I think it will be. That, and I can hope that there will be a beautiful nurse to - er - prep my feet.
Trepidatiously yours:
-Phatteus
Now, I am no stranger to pain. My threshold for pain is incredibly high. When I decided that I wanted to call a doctor, I knew that the pain was bad. I can tolerate a lot of pain... This I couldn't tolerate. (Hell, I've been hit squarely in the face with a baseball bat! It hurt.. but I was ok!)
Naturally, my "friends" all offered horror stories about how terrible a procedure it is, and how painful the recovery will be. A few told me that the pain I am in now is far worse than anything I'll be feeling tomorrow. That made me feel a little better.
I have had more severe surgical procedures performed on me than severe ticklings! (sadly, much more) So the trepidation I'm feeling isn't over the procedure. I pretty much know what it will entail, and I also know that I will be in no danger during this simple outpatient procedure. The thing that worries me that most is the fucking needle! As I said, I can tolerate pain, and I don't complain when I'm uncomfortable, but I have a terrible phobia of needles. At the dentist, I never get novocaine. I just changed dentists, and the new guy wanted to give me a filling, so he took out his drill, and took out his needle. I told him no needle, just drill. Well, he looked at me like I had lost my mind. But, he said that if I refused novocaine, he had to honor that request. He drilled the hell out of me, all the while wondering what I was feeling. I was feeling intense pain, but I could handle it. I couldn't handle that needle.
Now, this foot surgery will require local anathaesia. I know this. I won't be able to endure the toe torture without it, but that damn needle is just going to be unpleasant. Just do me a favor and think kind things for me at 3:30 tomorrow.
Now, I know what some of you are thinking: Jeez, kid, mellow out! It's just an ingrown toenail! There are people suffering out there, and you're freaking out over a little needle. To that metaphorical slam, I say: "tough".
Anyway, Phatteus will soon be up and active again. I can only hope that the recovery is as quick as I think it will be. That, and I can hope that there will be a beautiful nurse to - er - prep my feet.
Trepidatiously yours:
-Phatteus




