Polish politician fumes over "gay" elephant in zoo

[Gothika]

now this is realy messed up crap



WARSAW - A Polish politician has criticised his local zoo for acquiring a "gay" elephant named Ninio who prefers male companions and will probably not procreate, local media reported on Friday.

"We didn't pay 37 million zlotys (7.6 million pounds) for the largest elephant house in Europe to have a gay elephant live there," Michal Grzes, a conservative councillor in the city of Poznan in western Poland, was quoted as saying.

"We were supposed to have a herd, but as Ninio prefers male friends over females how will he produce offspring?" said Grzes, who is from the right-wing opposition Law and Justice party.

The head of the Poznan zoo said 10-year-old Ninio may be too young to decide whether he prefers males or females as elephants only reach sexual maturity at 14.

 

[Adam]

Hehe... is it a pink elephant? 😀

 

[SepicChick]

Hahaha WTF??

That guy is stupid. Why does it matter if the elephant is gay?

 

[Marquis De Sade]

Hahaha WTF??

That guy is stupid. Why does it matter if the elephant is gay?

Maybe he feels intimidated.

 

[Artoo]

Hahaha WTF??

That guy is stupid. Why does it matter if the elephant is gay?

It matters because, as he said, they paid out several million just to house it - it's not a particularly solid investment if it's gonna die in a few years with no offspring.
I can't help but feel that the fact that it's gay is not the issue - this guy would have the same problems with the deal if the elephant had a sperm deficiency.

 

[Marquis De Sade]

It matters because, as he said, they paid out several million just to house it - it's not a particularly solid investment if it's gonna die in a few years with no offspring.
I can't help but feel that the fact that it's gay is not the issue - this guy would have the same problems with the deal if the elephant had a sperm deficiency.

Yeeeeah. Good point but that's not funny. 😛

 

[sasaxrah]

Can't they just use the elephant sperm to impregnate a female elephant?

 

[Artoo]

Yeeeeah. Good point but that's not funny. 😛

What can I say? I'm a very down-to-earth sort of guy.

 

[slacker2114]

It matters because, as he said, they paid out several million just to house it - it's not a particularly solid investment if it's gonna die in a few years with no offspring.
I can't help but feel that the fact that it's gay is not the issue - this guy would have the same problems with the deal if the elephant had a sperm deficiency.

The average life span of an elephant is 70 years. He'll be around for quite awhile as he's only 10.

Can't they just use the elephant sperm to impregnate a female elephant?

I pity whoever the person is they choose to ...erm, extract the sperm.

 

[sasaxrah]

I pity whoever the person is they choose to ...erm, extract the sperm.

Sounds like we have a willing volunteer!

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

Animals can be gay?

Can't they just use the elephant sperm to impregnate a female elephant?

Is it wrong that I now have a sincere desire to watch someone jerk off an elephant? I mean, how would they do it? Do they have jerk-off machines like they have cow-milking machines? Or would someone have to climb that shit like a tree and just keep sliding down, climbing up and sliding down, until the job's done?

 

[slacker2114]

Is it wrong that I now have a sincere desire to watch someone jerk off an elephant? I mean, how would they do it? Do they have jerk-off machines like they have cow-milking machines? Or would someone have to climb that shit like a tree and just keep sliding down, climbing up and sliding down, until the job's done?

And that right there, Sarah, has just told you who your willing volunteer should be.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

And that right there, Sarah, has just told you who your willing volunteer should be.

Watch! Watch! I want to WATCH!!

 

[Sanhael]

It matters because, as he said, they paid out several million just to house it - it's not a particularly solid investment if it's gonna die in a few years with no offspring.

Not that this was the primary point or anything but, if the elephant is currently 10 years old, he's potentially got 50+ more years ahead of him.

 

[Artoo]

Is it wrong that I now have a sincere desire to watch someone jerk off an elephant? I mean, how would they do it? Do they have jerk-off machines like they have cow-milking machines? Or would someone have to climb that shit like a tree and just keep sliding down, climbing up and sliding down, until the job's done?

...



'the hell is wrong with you?

😀

 

[desdemona]

Um...ok, I can chime in (my thesis was on elephant reproduction). Sorry if it kills the humor.
They use electroejaculation like they do in bulls along with an artificial vagina to collect the elephant's sperm. I know several zoo keepers from Indianapolis who traveled to Africa to collect sperm from tranquilized animals - this increases the genetic pool available rather than limiting it to those animals in captivity.

African bull elephants are not ideal to keep around past sexual maturity (you'll notice most circus elephants are of the Asian variety and female...there IS a reason). Once they reach sexual maturity, they go through periods of "musth" - basically, when testosterone runs through their veins, they start secreting pheromones letting females in the area know they are on the prowl 😉 They also become EXTREMELY aggressive - you know, like the stories you hear about elephant trampling villagers and running amok in some Asian city? That would be the males. So I'd say that zoo better 1) have a good insurance plan 2) have educated their handlers on how to deal with this condition.

BTW, my special area of interest is theriogenology (google it). My clients don't call me "hot hands McArthur" for nothing 😉

 

[Artoo]

Watch! Watch! I want to WATCH!!

Feel free to watch;

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Nbh-FcyjWws&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Nbh-FcyjWws&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

And;

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FX9Fc2aZSkc&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FX9Fc2aZSkc&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

 

[Korastus]

Honestly?
The funniest part about all of this is imagining some politician yelling angrily about gay elephants.

 

[Aimee]

Poor elephant ... 🙁

 

[Saeria]

But the real question is.. would it be legal for this elephant to engage in a gay marriage in Poland? If he could, I for one would attend with heartfelt cheer. Go you brave, sweet elephant soul. Don't be afraid to express yourself!

One final thought....

..wait for it..

elephant reach-around...
the end.
Mr. Patel and his gay elephant.
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dB3UTuCzTPg&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dB3UTuCzTPg&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

 

[WorkInProgress]

I personally wouldn't complain if they abolished zoos completely and left the animals alone. How would you like to live in a cage in a climate foreign and uncomfortable for a bunch of screaming aliens to stroll by and look at you all day long?

 

[desdemona]

Many would agree with you. I'd say great answer, but until we stop killing those in the wild and wiping out their habitats, sadly, I'd say zoos at least allow them a chance of survival. Or improving their odds.

 

[slacker2114]

I personally wouldn't complain if they abolished zoos completely and left the animals alone. How would you like to live in a cage in a climate foreign and uncomfortable for a bunch of screaming aliens to stroll by and look at you all day long?

Depends....how's the food? And will I still have Internet access?

 

[desdemona]

Depends....how's the food? And will I still have Internet access?

Compared to your own cooking? Probably an improvement......

But hey, this isn't jail... not many elephants can type. And they are all too afraid of the mouse 😛

 

[MrMacphisto]

A gay elephant? Isn't that like another way of saying Log Cabin Republican?