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positive aspects of tickling

saratk

TMF Master
Joined
Oct 21, 2002
Messages
846
Points
18
as I work on self acceptance and embracing this part of myself...that I'm into tickling I'm trying to find things to embrace...Can you think of things about tickling or being into tickling that are positive/not to be judged? I know that's a pretty complicated question...Just looking for some things to put in the positive pile of having this interest.
 
Look, everything in life is judged, whether we want it to be or not.

Most of us, at some point, felt alone, or guarded, or that this vulnerable secret about us was too great a burden to bare. Will society look at us as freaks? What will make us be accepted?

The answer is not in the public, the people, or others, but yourself. I don't know about you, but tickling is a part of me that I wouldn't ever change.It's the air I breathe. The blood pumping in my veins. It informs my thoughts and fantasies. It makes me who I am. If you enjoy it, if you are passionate, it doesn't matter what others think. Tickling can be so many different things. It can be fun and intensive, thrilling and threatening. It drips closeness, it melds with the physical. You feast on sensation and reaction.

It's also, with the right touch, and with the right spice and passion, so easy to convert someone to.
 
Other than the fact that it feels good and doesn't hurt anyone (Ler or Lee). What helped me get over my shame was just joining the forum is that there are so many people on this forum. I'm not the only one who likes it fetish or not. I'm still not ready to tell people as in friends and family but I don't see the need to. I can have one thing that's just for me. I did tell one friend and sh said she already knew and it wasn't a big deal for her. I'm not sure if this helps but it's all I could come up with.
 
Here's my short answer: Identify the other positive aspects of yourself and add your love of tickling to that list, not because of any innate qualities but simply because it's a part of you.

No my long answer: I agree with everything said so far. I notice that you call it an interest which to me suggests that either it's not that strong a part of who you or that you're not completely comfortable in expressing this part of you. I'm going to assume that it's the latter. I can relate. In fact, I'm sure I've written many posts without even mentioning the word "tickling" because somehow the words flowed easier if I didn't mention "the word". I've been on the self-acceptance journey for a few years now. Expressing myself on this forum has helped me tremendously. Also, couples sex counseling helped me to understand who I am, how I got this way and to be more comfortable with it. I've said it here before; tickling is as much a part of my identity as my religion, ethnicity, cultural traits, etc...

I agree that people will judge. But they'll also judge you on those other aspects of your identity as well. The real problem is how they think and has nothing to do with you. You can openly express yourself or not. The choice is completely up to you. There is only a problem if not opening up causes you angst. I'm more comfortable now but that doesn't mean that I use it as a conversational ice breaker at cocktail parties. Tickling is part of my sexual identity and there's absolutely no obligation for me to have to share that part of me with anyone. For me to be happy, I need to accept it myself and be able to share it with my wife.

It's almost patronizing to just tell you to just be comfortable with yourself and move on. Fantastic if you can, but there are many influences in our lives that affect how we respond to social stigmas. I will always be on this journey. I wish you success.
 
Basing your feelings about yourself on others thoughts / reactions will never allow you to feel fully positive or confident.

You have to know, within yourself, that kink is nothing to be ashamed of, expect not everyone will be into it, but if they cant express that in a kind way, are they really someone you want around? Only you can allow others to make you feel ashamed of yourself.
 
Basing your feelings about yourself on others thoughts / reactions will never allow you to feel fully positive or confident.

You have to know, within yourself, that kink is nothing to be ashamed of, expect not everyone will be into it, but if they cant express that in a kind way, are they really someone you want around? Only you can allow others to make you feel ashamed of yourself.

That is definitely well put chi. Couldn't say it better myself.

On that notion I shall tell you my feelings about tickling. Now everyone doesn't know about my fetish,
only very close friends know about it. Alot of them seemed to be fine with it, but I have been judged
for it. Coming from a Christian background, tickling isn't always seen as much then it probably is around
those who aren't. In fact, when I was younger my parents would tell me to stop tickling the girls I use
to hang around. I would tickle women mostly because I had crushes on them. It was hard to keep under
wraps because some girls would tickle me so I instantly wanted to tickle back and they became annoyed.
I've had to hide my fetish and such for a long period of my life and couldn't express it until I found sites
like this one and others.

Now what do I like about tickling. Ticklish is a stress reliever. It also helps with depression and I believe
is a way to connect closely with alot of my friends. To tell stories, the teasing and feeling of no control,
and the ability to forget everything in the world just while i'm being tickled is what I love about it.
 
It sounds like you're more concerned about your own judgement of yourself, than worried about what others think, but I'll try to cover both with my thoughts. If you can be happy with having the fetish yourself, any worries over other people's judgement will fade


The things to help you (or others) see the fetish in a much more positive way:

- the production and sharing of laughter, which in turn is such a great stress-reliever and great exercise. It's a great way to just be silly!

- The use of tickling as a great way of flirting and establishing a playful and physical relationship with someone to whom you may have romantic intentions (so many people will have tickled others in this way without giving it a second thought)

- The use of tickling in your sex life with trusted partners - you can hold your head high knowing that you're trying something a bit different, a bit exciting and something that can open doors to your partner to try anything different they would like to try sexually. The satisfaction also that you're not suppressing something you have a strong desire for. Loads of couple try things in the bedroom, this is no different

- You've found a whole online community of people who share the same fetish and openly debate and discuss it in this forum alongside other normal day-to-day things - I often compare this to other interests/hobbies often thought of as weird, such a steam engines - something I am passionate about and people often frown on and mock without giving it a chance or bothering to find about more about the 'steam engine scene', yet I'm still able to enjoy and share this interest with friends online as well the few I share it with in real life.

Any other judgements would come from people who are either not worth the worry, or from decent people who may just need to get their head around it a bit for them to understand it and by explaining some of what I've said above, I think most decent people and friends would probably have no issue at all with it.

I think the only negatives about having this fetish, ie things that could justify you being harsh on yourself, or could justify someone else judging you, would be for you to mishandle the fetish - for example continuing to tickle someone when they say 'stop', or tickling a stranger without permission - or becoming obsessive with it to the point where you do these things, or where it's taking over your life in the wrong sort of way and causing you to miss out on other wonderful things in life because you're forever sat on tickle websites all day hoping to meet the special lee/ler

hope that helps

Cheers
TTG
 
At the risk of sounding naïve: What's even arguably negative about being into tickling?
 
My ex used to tickle me to cheer me up. That trick always works for me. :smilelove
 
It is the best fetish to have!
It is Not gross, dangerous, or involve expensive toys. Just think about how many fetishes are downright horrifying!...but not tickling 😉 it is something very easy to tell a significant other, as most think it is cute or fun.
Personally, i think being being tickled feels nice <3. There are some kinks out there that involve self mutilation. I understand that being a negative thing.... That is Another reason I am SO thankful I have this fetish. Nothing about It is shameful, or weird.
You should accept Knismolagnia as a positive trait
 
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