Somewhat tasteless Humor (The best kind)

[Prime]

These two guys meet after not having seen each other for
many many years. First guy asks the second guy, "How have
things been going?"

The second guy speaking very s..l..o..w..l..y.. tells the
first guy, "I w..a..s.. a..l..m..o..s..t
m..a..r..r.. i..e..d."

The first guy says in amazement, "Hey; you don't stutter
any more."

The answer comes, " Y..e..s, I w..e..n..t t..o a
d..o..c..t..o..r.. a..n..d h..e t..o..l..d m..e
t..h..a..t i..f I s..p..e..a..k.. s..l..o..w..l..y
I w..i..l..l n..o..t s..t..u..t..t..e..r.

"The first friend congratulates him and than asks again
about how he was almost married."

W..e..l..l m..y f..i..a..n..c..e..e a..n..d I
w..e..r..e s..i...t..t..i..n..g.. o..n h..e..r
p..o...r..c..h a..n..d t..h..e d..o..g w..a..s
s..c..r..a..t..c..h..i..n..g h..i..s b..a..c..k
a..n..d I t..o..l..d h..e..r t..h..a..t w..h..e..n
w..e a..r..e m..a..r..r..i..e..d s..h..e c..a..n
d..o t..h..a..t f..o..r m..e a..n..d s..h..e
t..h..r..e..w t..h..e r..i..n..g i..n m..y
f..a..c..e.."

"Why should she throw the ring in your face for that?"
asks the first friend."

W..e..l..l I s..p..e..a..k s..o s..l..o..w..l..y,
t..h..a..t b..y t..h..e t..i..m..e s..h..e
l..o..o..k..e..d.. a..t t..h..e d..o..g, h..e
w..a..s l..i..c..k..i..n..g h..i..s b..a..l..l..s."

 

[amk714]

Apparently she did not like oral sex (performing it, anyway)

 

[duo_maxwell]

how can you call that joke tasteless? It left a godawful taste in my mouth (j/k)

nice one Prime

 

[Scooby112211]

well he could always just use the dog...it seems to know what it's doing.

 

[amk714]

Yuck Scooby!

Since I have two dogs, I should be offended, but I'll let this one go I don't even let them lick me on the lips (face is OK)

 

[Dave2112]

Two hobos are stumbling down an alleyway when they come across a mangy dog licking his balls. One bum says to the other, "Gee, I wish I could do that!"

The other says "Well, you can give it a shot...but I think he might bite you."

 

[amk714]

Better, Dave...

Though still rather gross

 

[BigJim]

A guy is walking down the street on his way to get his Social Seurity cheque from the Unemployment Office. On the way he sees a sign on the wall of a house saying "MAN WANTED---------MUST HAVE VERY GOOD SENSE OF SMELL".

He knocks on the door and a guy answers wearing stocking, suspenders and a french maid's outfit. The guy takes a step backwards but decides to press on anyway.
"You've got a sign on the wall asking for a man with a very good sense of smell" he says.
"Oh come in lovie!" says the guy in drag. The walks into the man's living room and asks what he has to do.
"Well first I've got to test you" the drag-queen says, putting a blindfold on him.

He holds something under his nose and asks what it is.
"It's a bit of apple isn't it?" the unemployed guy asks.
"Oh, bloody marvellous, you're amazing, says the drag queen, and holds something else there.
"A bit of banana?" the guy asks.
"Oh this is amazing lovey!" exclaims the drag queen. "Okay, last one in the test".

The unemployed guy takes one sniff at the third thing and passes out cold. He wakes up two hours later lying on the floor with the blindfold removed.
"What the bloody hell was that?" he asks.
"Chloroform lovey" replies the drag queen."Makes your ass sore doesn't it?"

 

[venray]

Prime.....

Scooby....

Dave......

BigJim....

Jim sure knows how to bring a thread to an abrupt halt!LOL...

 

[BigJim]

RAY!!!!!!!! Where did you get that pic of me in my Saturday-night outfit???????

 

[venray]

RAY!!!!!!!! Where did you get that pic of me in my Saturday-night outfit???????

I have me sources, mate......be very careful.... ..or I will have to post a pic of you in your Friday-night one as well...(and you WOULDN't want that Mr. Hulk)

Ray

 

[BigJim]

http://photos.groups.yahoo.com/grou...ktickleloversgang/lst?&.dir=/&.src=gr&.view=t


This one you mean?

 

[venray]

Yup, that would be the one! LOL

 

[BigJim]

Yup, that would be the one! LOL

Bugger! I actually tried to post that pic, but only the URL came up. Thought it would give everyone a good laugh.

 

[venray]

Bugger! I actually tried to post that pic, but only the URL came up. Thought it would give everyone a good laugh.

No Problem!

BigJim on Friday nights


Ven

 

[BigJim]

No Problem!

BigJim on Friday nights


Ven

Thanks Ray, you obvously have much more technical know-how than I do. I would like to add for all the TMF members who just had heart attacks seeing this, that the hair, forehead and nose you see in that pic are NOT mine. They were prosthetically added in the make-up room. The things I do for fancy dress arties eh?

 

[BigJim]

Ray, can yuo pleasepleaasepleasepleasepleaseplease tell me who that girl in your sig gif is?

 

[venray]

First of all to everyone....you should see him WITHOUT the fake hair, nose, an forehead!!!!

Jim..I have no idea who she is..I believe it's one of solepatrol's real life pics he posted on his site a few years back... He always had some GREAT shots....I merely took two shots and animated and resized them........


Ray

 

[venray]

Hey Jim! If you want any more posted, just let me know........


Ray

 

[amk714]

Really, Ven? I thought it was one of footpatrol's pics (if you don't know who he is, he's just like solepatrol, only he does his taping in NYC's parks) Pity there isn't one of her being tickled But I love the way she invites me to your playroom!

P.S. BigJim, you should've been cast to play the leading role in the upcoming Incredible Hulk movie

 

[venray]

THAT'S it AMK! Footpatrol...I have been wracking my little brain trying to remember that name....T/Y....Do you know whether or not his site still exists?

Ven

 

[BigJim]

P.S. BigJim, you should've been cast to play the leading role in the upcoming Incredible Hulk movie

Hey man, I offered but they had more faith in their CG graphics. You can't see it very well in those photos, but my eyes are white too, a'la David Banner. Those bloody contacts itched like buggery, but the sacrifices we make for our art, eh?

 

[BigJim]

By the way Ven and AMK, I like the idea behind this Sole Patrol and Foot Patrol premise. Where can I find some other stuff on the web like this?

 

[amk714]

Y/W!

Yes, go to http://members.tripod.com/~candidsoles/

It's got some pics from his tapes, plus links to his Yahoo! group and some of his old stuff

Also found a Yahoo! group by solepatrol (I think it's the same person): http://groups.yahoo.com/group/solepatrolsworld/

 

[venray]

Thanks AMK...you rule! I have been looking for that site for a long time now! Muchas Gracias....

Ven