Suffering from severe depression

[tickleteasing]

I have not posted in a while due to a problem with depression. I am in bed not able to get out, I am taking lexapro 40 mil so I tried abilify and even though it helped a little with the depression it made me want to eat everything in site so I got off of it. Now I am off of it again and I lost 15 pounds in a week.

 

[Bothersome]

Getting off of your antidepressant while you are still depressed is an unwise move.

I'm assuming by this point that you've already been to a doctor about this. If he recommended this medication, you should continue to take it. If he did not, then start taking medication that he does recommend.

Wanting to eat a lot sucks, but it's significantly better than being constantly depressed.

 

[ticklebunny 2]

Awww I am really sorry to hear this tickleteasing. 🙁 🙁 I really thought that your severe depression had been starting to fade out and go away for a little while. I thought the shows you were working on thefriendsnextdoor-had been helping you a great deal -helped you feel like you once again had real purpose and made you feel good doing the shows. I thought you were starting to feel a lot better. You seemed for a while to be smiling and it was so great to see you smile and hear you laugh again. I am sorry you are once again being dragged down big time by your severe depression. That sucks for sure. I am so sorry that this is happening to you. I know I have been there.

I have been depressed myself it is not fun, it is misery, never a picnic. 🙁 To be honest right now-I am sadly suffering through feeling really down and depressed myself also-lot lately. So many goals I want to happen in the present and in the future-tired of so many potential to be-very well could happen set backs-not that those set backs have yet happened-but could happen, it falls into that scary, sad future-yet unknown-yet sadly could happen-another potential hardship that is. Than again another potential future hardship may not happen-maybe for once the hardships will lessen and happier times ahead but yet-sadly it is the unknown-sad torture/fear of the unknown on what is going to happen. I am sure you know what I am talking about-never fun to wait for goals to happen and things you want to happen-to happen. Waiting is the roughest thing. It can feel like forever at times. It can really test your one's patience and one's spirit that is for sure.

I too am also fed up with the bad storms and personal hard times that have been/are upon me-yearn for happier times-more rainbows/less storms-no storms for a while. I am more than ready for joy and contentment-times of laughter and good times-I really do get that the storms /hardships in one's life-makes one stronger when it comes to learning how to show more kindness, empathy, and love-when it comes to strengthening one's character and integrity-helps a person become stronger because of the hardships. Yet I got to say- be honest-ready for happier times/fed up with sad miserable hardships.🙁

I just want to let you know I am here for you/always be here for you. I hope soon that the new meds help you recover/beat this depression for good/depression don't come back for a really long time and stays gone for a long time. You are such a great friend-a wonderful person-kind and with a big heart-sorry to see this dragging you down. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and close in my heart. I hope you feel better soon. I really miss you. May you get well soon and may you soon in time-reach/achieve your goals find what truly makes you feel at peace and feel happy/content. Sending hugs, *hugging you*

 

[Bugman]

Getting off of your antidepressant while you are still depressed is an unwise move.

I'll second that, and suggest you need to start seeing a psychologist, psychiatrist or some sort of mental health professional. I speak from experience here. Medication alone won't do the job for many people.

 

[tickleteasing]

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place I mean if I take the abilify it gets rid of the depression but it makes me eat like a horse if i am off of it I wind up in bed miserable

 

[Mitchell]

teasing, I'm very sorry to hear about your depression.

You probably need to have a doctor advise you to get off the medicine. Also, you mentioned the med making you eat. That sounds like a steroid. My mom has been on steroids during her cancer treatment, and they have given her eating binges. The Dr told us anyone on those meds have to be taken/weaned off them gradually.

I hope you can find a solution to resolve your depression. Good Luck.

Mitch

 

[ticklebunny 2]

I really do feel for you tickleteasing. I know what you are saying. I mean granted I have never really been technically really been diagnosed with severe clinical depression. However I got to say I am not a stranger to feeling sad and depressed -not foreign to me -know what you are saying when you say you tend to look/see things negatively-hate that you do that-see the glass half empty but you can't really prevent/can't stop doing this-seeing the glass half empty, not see the glass half full. Like I said in the past and also for the longest time lately-sadly been feeling really down and depressed myself. It is not a fun place to be. I am sorry you feel like you are between a rock and a hard place-that is being if you take the abilify-it gets rid of the depression for a while-but sadly it causes you to eat like a horse-eating like crazy-that is really too bad, so sorry to hear that. That sucks really it does.🙁 If you end up getting off your abilify than you wind up in bed miserable. That is really rough, I imagine also not just in bed miserable but also wiped out physically energy wise, super tired I imagine. I really do hope your psychiatrist can help you real soon-get weaned off this abilify and help you find the meds that will help you not only stop the depression-help get rid of the depression-so don't come back for a long time-but also-med that would not cause you to eat like crazy-help you not feel miserable and completely tired/wiped out. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Hope this can get figured out really soon for you. It is really hard to to see you feeling so miserable-hate to see you going through this terrible anxiety/depression-emotional torture.

Get well soon. Just know I am here for you. Really wish there was something I could do that would help you. I feel so helpless-just wish your depression would leave, never come back-it pains my heart to see you enduring/going through this miserable torture. Well got to go-deliver papers-thanks for giving a update letting me know-get well soon. Night *Hugging you*

 

[BellybTickler]

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place I mean if I take the abilify it gets rid of the depression but it makes me eat like a horse if i am off of it I wind up in bed miserable

Unfortunately, chronic depression isn't something that is gotten 'rid' of. Depression is both a physical and mental condition, it requires both medication and therapy to beat. You're eating because it's a comfort in place of the medication, tell this to your doctor and perhaps switch medications. Secondly, talk to your doctor about various types of therapy; I know the one type that did wonders for me was Occupational Group Therapy.

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

I actually suffered from crippling depression for about six months a few years ago, similar to your situation; I didn't leave my bed except for the occasional shower or meal. I had been collecting unemployment at the moment, and I pretty much festered for months on end.

I can't say I really "pulled" myself out of it, but it gradually lifted over a period of two years... and the entire experience scared the shit out of me, to know how far one can fall. Sometimes it felt like I was circling a drain.

The only thing I can tell you is keep hope alive, and try all sorts of things (exercise being foremost!) in addition to any regimen your doc has you on... it usually gets better.

 

[ZenTickling]

Have you tried any other medications? You might find something else that works just as well without the side effects.

You could also increase your intake of water, protein, and fruits/veggies. Those will make you less hungry. Get rid of any kind of junk food so if you have to eat, you'll have a healthy snack.

 

[ZenTickling]

Exercise also kills appetite (for me at least). After 40 minutes of yoga all I want is water.. I don't even want to think of eating.

 

[Bothersome]

Exercise is absolutely wonderful when you're feeling shitty. Nothing worked better for me than going out on a small walk during the night. I could get the blood flowing without running into a bunch of fucking annoying people.

 

[Soda Bobinski]

The only thing I can tell you is keep hope alive, and try all sorts of things (exercise being foremost!) in addition to any regimen your doc has you on... it usually gets better.

Exercise also kills appetite (for me at least). After 40 minutes of yoga all I want is water.. I don't even want to think of eating.

Exercise is absolutely wonderful when you're feeling shitty. Nothing worked better for me than going out on a small walk during the night. I could get the blood flowing without running into a bunch of fucking annoying people.

I agree & can attest to the mental & emotional benefits of exercising.

It's sometimes difficult to get started & "make" yourself do it , but you feel like a fucking BOSS when you're done & ya can't help but feel good about yourself. Totally worth it just for that reason alone.


Best of luck to ya , tickleteasing.

 

[BritTickler]

Exercise is definitely a good idea - although I must add most people find it incredibly hard to get motivated for that kind of thing, let alone those who are depressed! Although on the other hand the positive experience you should get out of it will hopefully be all the motivation you need!

Above all you want to get your meds and maybe some professional therapy sorted though. Depression is a disease.

 

[metalgod]

I am sorry that you feel so low most of the time 🙁

I truly believe, however, that you can learn something greater from the depression. In a sense, you are very GOOD at being depressed...not that that in itself that is a good thing, but it shows your mind has a lot of power. If you can turn that same power around in the positive direction, you could be that good at being happy, too.

Stay strong 🙂 Depression and other bad moods are like a marathon...and sometimes they certainly feel that way. But, like with physical exercise, I think that working through it instead of letting the pain get to you will make you stronger. The progress lies when you work beyond the pain.

My advice...try to remember times when you were happiest, and think about what elements in those experiences made you happy. Then, find ways to implement those elements into your life again. Whether its for good or bad, people make associations with things that are good and things that are not. Try to think about what elements make you happy and find ways to include them in your life. Then, you'll have more things around you that you associate with happiness. Sometimes we miss the happy times we used to have, and that makes us feel worse. But, don't try to include the happy memories, just include the happy elements so you can have new, happy experiences.

I wish you the best 🙂

 

[ticklemepls]

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place I mean if I take the abilify it gets rid of the depression but it makes me eat like a horse if i am off of it I wind up in bed miserable

ok well, unwise for us to be giving you medical advice, but there are lots of anit-depressant drugs out there... however, drugs alone are meant to HELP with the depression, not cure it. They're an aid- you cannot rely solely (no pun intended foot people) on the pills. Find a way to channel the rest of the energy, be it counseling, turn it into anger and join martial arts- find SOMETHING that gives you a purpose...

 

[ticklebunny 2]

Right now the best thing you can do for yourself is to try to stay/be kind and be good to yourself. Try really hard not to be hard on yourself tickleteasing. You are going through severe depression-now is not the time to get upset with yourself-not to get aggravated w yourself for not feeling better/not getting well sooner. This is not your fault in no way, no shape, and in no form -this is not your fault. Take it easy, try to keep the stress to a very bare minimum/try not to do too much all at once-like for example might be a good idea to slow down/take it easy-pace yourself to a slow but steady pace-when it comes to work, working on getting your shows started back up again-steady and slow-pace yourself/ pace yourself when it comes to your online businesses you work on-try not to do all this at once. Besides resting, seeing your psychiatrist-taking the meds/anti-depressants he gives you-maybe also including therapy to help you with your severe depression-might be a good idea-to rest, sleep more when you can-might help to catch up on taking naps, try to slowly build up energy once again to take walks when you are feeling much better-not so tired/not so physically/miserable in general. Besides, rest/naps/sleep, trying to eat bannanas/bit of a balanced good diet that might help give back your energy and might help your depression lessen in intensity/maybe keep depression away for a while. Besides rest/naps and sleep-medium balance of work on online businesses of yours-working on trying to get the shows back up again-best thing-find/make time also additionally for the things you fidn that you still truly enjoy-watch your funny you tube clips or look over/or read your numerology books, or watch your Rocky movies, or basically do find make time when you have worked on/accomplished some moderate work goals/or show goals-make time to enjoy whatever hobbies or things that help you relax and de-stress-do things you enjoy more than vs trying to try to do too much at once too soon-vs mentally /physically energy-wise overexerting yourself too much. Hope this helps.

I really hope things start to turn around once again for you-get well soon. Oh and remember you got friends you can turn to and talk to-that will listen be there also for you-don't try to be tough and go through this alone tickleteasing-we all have had our dark scary and sad times. Don't be afraid to tell/let others be there for you-if you need a friend, need something-voice that, whatever you do try not to battle this alone-try not to isolate yourself. I know it is super tough,I have been there-sadly I have gone through it so I know how painful, scary, and tough it can be. I know how difficult it can be but try to avoid isolating yourself for that will only make you feel even more truly alone-feel even sadder-make the depression feel that much worse/stronger/more miserable-more intense.:* Hugging you* Hoping and praying for you to get well soon. Miss you.

 

[ticklebunny 2]

I hope that you are doing alright-really hope soon your medications can get figured out and fixed correctly. Really miss you friend-🙁 hope soon to hear a update when you get a chance to post a recent update. Good luck with working on/pursuing your online businesses and also on your shows on you tube. Sending hugs to you. Get well soon.

 

[tickleteasing]

I feel like I am dying

 

[kopfhorer]

Man, that's ultra-rough. I definitely feel your pain.

Coincidentally, I'm listening to an audio book by CBS news anchor Mike Wallace, and I'm up to the part where he talks about getting treatment for his own severe depression (he got through it OK).

Abilify is an "atypical antipsychotic" which is also used to treat depression. Word is that especially when combined with other meds it can synergize and ratchet up the effectiveness. The downside of antipsychotics of any kind is that they can make you gain weight. I second the idea of phasing out junky, sugary or fatty foods. Pigging out on dense but low-calorie foods will probably minimize the damage. Wheat products (like say, bagels) are reportedly more fattening than candy bars.

I'm going to go out on a limb here. Have you ever had a sleep study? Sleep apnea can aggravate depression like nothing else will. In any case, keep on keepin' on. We're here for you.

 

[ticklebunny 2]

Really sorry to hear this tickleteasing. I just seen your recent post to this thread tonight just now. Hopefully it has not become as miserable/severe as all that. I feel so helpless/so powerless-really wish there was something that I could do to help you-really wish this depression would go away and your depression would leave you alone and it never would come back. So saddens my heart to hear this. 🙁 🙁 🙁 Really hope soon you can beat this depression and you can feel better real soon. So sorry this is happening to you-just keep your focus on getting well and take it easy-be good to yourself. *Hugging you* just know I will always be here for you.

 

[kis123]

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place I mean if I take the abilify it gets rid of the depression but it makes me eat like a horse if i am off of it I wind up in bed miserable

I'm truly sorry for the side effects, but if it weren't for abilify, my son would probably be dead or somewhere wishing he was. It was the only thing that worked for him in his teens and he's still on it (now age 26). It is a good med for mood disorders but it does have some side effects.

Many have said exercise helps, and they're right; but it's hard to even consider exercise when you literally have to will yourself out of bed to even go to the bathroom. I personally have been there and done that. I'm currently not on meds, but know when those times come when all I want to do is be left alone or get angry with the world or God because I can't seem to get control of whatever "it" is. But I work myself through it with regaining control of those thoughts that if left unchecked, would overtake and consume me. I spent years in that hole and have taken a prescription pad full of meds. But if things got really bad, I wouldn't hesitate to take whatever medication would help pull me out that hole of darkness.

Sometimes, you have to fight your way through things that seem so simple like bathing on a regular basis, or going outside to get some fresh air. Seems so simple right? Well for those who struggle with severe depression, it's almost impossible.

Someone mentioned your mind being strong; he is right. You have been so focused on the depression that it has completely consumed you. I am NOT saying that what you're going through isn't very real, I am saying that if you consider slowly and deliberately work on your thought life, eventually your thinking will begin to clear and you'll actually start to feel a little better. Those things that seem so impossible today will become tolerable and eventually natural for you again.

There is hope and sometimes that's all we have to work with. My hope is that you read this and consider what your life would look like if you started to see with a different set of eyes and a more hopeful and eventually positive perspective.

You can always lose weight once the side effects dissipate; but if the medicine helps you to think more clearly and feel just a little of your old self, I wouldn't take it away. Once you start feeling better and regain control of your thought life, you can take walks and eventually get to the gym and deal with any weight issues. The side effects won't last forever but if you don't take your meds, you're setting yourself up for some misery that will make your current state look like a walk in the park.

Please reconsider your decision and focus on relief and remedy as much as you can. I truly wish you well and bid you peace and hope for a complete recovery.

 

[evilwomanhehe]

I'm sorry to hear about your depression, Tickleteasing. Please, it is not wise to get off of a controlled substance. You have to get off of it gradually--not in an instance. I take Klonopan for my anxiety and had to get off of it for a couple of weeks because my doctor is in east bumblefuck. I was a complete MESS because I got off of it so quick. Please, visit your doctor and tell him about your situation. You can't do what you are doing--it is not healthy for you.

~Victoria