Things I've Learned in Six Months as a Father...

[Dave2112]

Well, our little Viktor is six months old and in that time I've learned a few things. Of course, the first thing you learn is that all that fluffy bullshit about unconditional love and such...is actually all true. 😀 Our little guy, affectionately nicknamed "Boog", is a true treasure in every sense of the word.

But, there are more specific things I've learned about fatherhood that I thought I'd share with those expecting...and those who have been there.

- A baby's ability to sleep is in direct opposed correlation to a couple's desire to have sex.

- Only a puppy can even begin to rival a baby's ability to turn a grown man into a goofy, babbling idiot.

- Strained peas are actually pretty fuckin' good.

- Poopy diapers are kinda cute...for the first three months. After that, processed uranium is a more desirable clean-up project.

- After all these years, Sesame Street is still awesome and Barney still sucks.

- Fairly OddParents is brilliant.

- Grandparents know everything. Which would have been nice when they were parents...

- Dad Tip from Dave...Throw shit out so you can go to the store and buy more. It's the only break you'll get. 😉

- Sleep is a commodity rivaled only by oxygen and porn.

- When an adult pees on you, it's Golden Shower Night at The Vault. When your baby does it...it's Tuesday.

Happy parenting!!!

 

[Bothersome]

Well, as terrifying as that sounds, I'm sure it's worth it. You sound like you're doing a fantastic job as a dad; I'm sure the little guy will appreciate it... in twenty years or so.

To me, that sounds like an absolutely frightening job that I would fail at miserably.

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

Fairly Oddparents is a fantastic show.

...and so is Yo Gabba Gabba. Don't judge. Just watch, and imagine you have a tenth of the mental facilities you do now; then you'll get it.

 

[jaba]

Congratulations, Dave. Great thread.

Treasure every day of the most awesome and humbling experience in a lifetime....fatherhood.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

You so make me want to have kids.

(not being sarcastic)

 

[venray]

It just gets better and better from here Bro.....the problems become more serious, but the rewards far outweigh them....My boy is 12....we have recently watched all of the bond films and are into the Matrix trilogy....It is amazing to see them again through fresh eyes....

Just wait til yours is old enough for Star Wars.....You will be in Heaven...

 

[Dave2112]

Fairly Oddparents is a fantastic show.

...and so is Yo Gabba Gabba. Don't judge. Just watch, and imagine you have a tenth of the mental facilities you do now; then you'll get it.

Oh, he's totally into Yo Gabba Gabba...and I have a new appreciation for those who'll devote themselves to children's entertainment. It's actually pretty well done if you look at all the specifics they put into it.

 

[Dave2112]

It just gets better and better from here Bro.....the problems become more serious, but the rewards far outweigh them....My boy is 12....we have recently watched all of the bond films and are into the Matrix trilogy....It is amazing to see them again through fresh eyes....

Just wait til yours is old enough for Star Wars.....You will be in Heaven...

Yeah, we have so much to do when he's old enough...Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, etc. Not to mention teaching him to play music. We got him the Baby Einstein series and he's already in love with classical music and loves sitting on my lap and watching rock videos on Youtube.

He actually has seen a few Star Wars movies with Dad while I had it on in the background...he seems to like the lightsaber fights...all bright and colorful and what-not.