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Tickling and Mental Health

I'd be more surprised if I ever attracted a woman that even tolerated this kink let alone finding it romantic.
So, let's fix a few.

To me, "romantic" is a word like "nice"; if you have to say it, you're probably not very.

Partners that I had been with usually had some big ulterior motive for picking a partner, namely, if you look like "dad material", which I guess I did resemble. When I put together the pieces like how we met, who I met (important), how we found things connecting, the duration of the relationship, it makes sense that they didn't pass the year marker, etc. because it was clear that I didn't follow their implicit plan so they got rid of me. What that says is they basically set themselves up for disappointment.

I'm a guy; what do I care about the meaning of the word romantic? I'm not exactly in the best of positions, and that word yields itself to others like "alimony," "childcare," and others.

Relationships should really be more about having a friendship that benefits two people to want to be close.

But my exposure hasn't really observed people who would've really been committed outside of some ploy for social standing like being married.
 
So, let's fix a few.

To me, "romantic" is a word like "nice"; if you have to say it, you're probably not very.

Partners that I had been with usually had some big ulterior motive for picking a partner, namely, if you look like "dad material", which I guess I did resemble. When I put together the pieces like how we met, who I met (important), how we found things connecting, the duration of the relationship, it makes sense that they didn't pass the year marker, etc. because it was clear that I didn't follow their implicit plan so they got rid of me. What that says is they basically set themselves up for disappointment.

I'm a guy; what do I care about the meaning of the word romantic? I'm not exactly in the best of positions, and that word yields itself to others like "alimony," "childcare," and others.

Relationships should really be more about having a friendship that benefits two people to want to be close.

But my exposure hasn't really observed people who would've really been committed outside of some ploy for social standing like being married.
Right, I'm not meaning to get into semantics. I'm just trying to understand your pov, but I'm not sure I'm there yet.

Partners that I had been with usually had some big ulterior motive for picking a partner, namely, if you look like "dad material", which I guess I did resemble.

To me, this is exactly what I'd expect from a woman. It doesn't seem like an ulterior motive to me, but just something a lot of women actually want on a deep, biological level. I totally get wanting a woman to accept you for your kinks and all, but when it comes down to it, a lot of women are ultimately looking for a good partner to father their children, to make them feel safe and secure, etc., and not just someone to share a kink with, which is something most of them would maybe even rather do without? So I guess what I'm saying is, even if they're into it, it's probably way down on their priority list of things they're looking for in a relationship even if it might be at the top for you. Hopefully that makes sense.
 
To me, this is exactly what I'd expect from a woman. It doesn't seem like an ulterior motive to me, but just something a lot of women actually want on a deep, biological level. I totally get wanting a woman to accept you for your kinks and all, but when it comes down to it, a lot of women are ultimately looking for a good partner to father their children, to make them feel safe and secure, etc., and not just someone to share a kink with, which is something most of them would maybe even rather do without? So I guess what I'm saying is, even if they're into it, it's probably way down on their priority list of things they're looking for in a relationship even if it might be at the top for you. Hopefully that makes sense.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested in semantics either.

I just can't really get on board with "just" wanting kids/starting a family and not wanting much to do with the "pleasure" side of meeting someone and developing a bond.

Since tickling fetish has a "coincidental" relationship with "the autism spectrum" (I've heard about it and it makes me think about it more because I don't have something mainstream) the combination of trying to date, discovering these factors in the "scene", having my so-called affliction, looking at the "fet scene" and back just kind of makes me feel like I've been trolled.

I wasn't good enough for sex.

I wasn't good enough for a committed relationship.

So now (or back then/in reference to back then) I'm hearing that I should be "grateful" that someone who "just wants to get married" would "settle" for me?

Call me a bit offended.

So while I get that those that don't follow the conventional agendas set themselves up for "failure" I guess I'll admit I fail to see the proverbial forest for the trees.
 
Very interesting thread. Thanks for starting it and asking the question,@rambophat31 , and to everyone who has responded. Want to write more, but in a time crunch on a Monday morning here in California where I live. Just wanted to say real quick, these highs and lows people are explaining around tickling and experiencing tickling sound alot to me like just our everyday experiences as humans. We are always cycling through a myriad of emotions as we go thru our day to day. I am someone that has had and continues to have (and I suspect will always have) depression and anxiety issues. Finding buddhist teachings and books and meditations and podcasts where people are sharing their depressive and anxious and scary thoughts always seems to help me get thru my depressive and anxious episodes. I really like Dan Harris’s 10% Happier podcast. It’s helped me immensely. Will write more later, just had to chime in quickly on a Monday morning. Thanks all, have a wondeful day🙏
 
I actually agree - lighter tickling can be really good for my mental health under the right circumstances.

The gentle, playful kind (soft nails, feathers, slow tracing) gives my brain something to focus on without overwhelming it. It pulls me out of overthinking spirals and gives me that nice dopamine hit from laughing and squirming.

Intense sessions are more “release valve” for me, but the lighter stuff feels genuinely therapeutic — like a reset button for my brain.

Anyone else notice this? Especially ADHD folks?
 
I actually agree - lighter tickling can be really good for my mental health under the right circumstances.

The gentle, playful kind (soft nails, feathers, slow tracing) gives my brain something to focus on without overwhelming it. It pulls me out of overthinking spirals and gives me that nice dopamine hit from laughing and squirming.

Intense sessions are more “release valve” for me, but the lighter stuff feels genuinely therapeutic — like a reset button for my brain.

Anyone else notice this? Especially ADHD folks?
The ADHD side of me loves this but the Autistic side of me hates being touched gently its almost painful. Having both ADHD and Autism is like a double edged sword because ADHD is so chaotic and out there while Autism is controlled and reserved so I'm very forgetful with a brain always going 100mph but I have to have a plan, routine and generally don't enjoy trying new things. It's a bummer 😕. Tickling for me helps my mental health because it makes me happy in ways nothing else can. If that makes sense. It's also cool to meet someone else on here also from Florida. 😀
 
Very interesting thread. Thanks for starting it and asking the question,@rambophat31 , and to everyone who has responded. Want to write more, but in a time crunch on a Monday morning here in California where I live. Just wanted to say real quick, these highs and lows people are explaining around tickling and experiencing tickling sound alot to me like just our everyday experiences as humans. We are always cycling through a myriad of emotions as we go thru our day to day. I am someone that has had and continues to have (and I suspect will always have) depression and anxiety issues. Finding buddhist teachings and books and meditations and podcasts where people are sharing their depressive and anxious and scary thoughts always seems to help me get thru my depressive and anxious episodes. I really like Dan Harris’s 10% Happier podcast. It’s helped me immensely. Will write more later, just had to chime in quickly on a Monday morning. Thanks all, have a wondeful day🙏
Thank you for sharing as well. Depression and Anxiety are tough to deal with. Especially those diagnosed with it. I'm glad that you found ways to help you with it and I look forward to hearing more from you, here.
 
Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested in semantics either.

I just can't really get on board with "just" wanting kids/starting a family and not wanting much to do with the "pleasure" side of meeting someone and developing a bond.

Since tickling fetish has a "coincidental" relationship with "the autism spectrum" (I've heard about it and it makes me think about it more because I don't have something mainstream) the combination of trying to date, discovering these factors in the "scene", having my so-called affliction, looking at the "fet scene" and back just kind of makes me feel like I've been trolled.

I wasn't good enough for sex.

I wasn't good enough for a committed relationship.

So now (or back then/in reference to back then) I'm hearing that I should be "grateful" that someone who "just wants to get married" would "settle" for me?

Call me a bit offended.

So while I get that those that don't follow the conventional agendas set themselves up for "failure" I guess I'll admit I fail to see the proverbial forest for the trees.
I don't think you should get on board with something you don't want, but I'd say the same thing goes for the other person as well - that is, they shouldn't get on board with something they don't really want either. It's not that I think things are the way they should be or the way I'd want them either, but I'm just saying what I think about the way the world actually works - and you're right, the right person won't just settle for you - your attractions and values will actually line up and it should feel natural, but unfortunately, many of us don't get to experience this. It's not a matter of being good enough, but a matter of connecting with the right people. The more idiosyncrasies and quirks we have, the more the odds will feel stacked against us!

I didn't know there was any association between Autism and tickling, so that's news to me. I've never sought help and always found ways to manage just enough to get by, so I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I've struggled with depression and anxiety my entire life, always sensing something was wrong with me but never quite sure what it was. If I did seek treatment, I'd probably be diagnosed with either ADHD or Autism, or possibly both. I self-medicated with alcohol for about a decade before finally kicking that vice, and every phase of my life has left me feeling like I'm at least a decade or two behind where I should be in life.
 
I don't think you should get on board with something you don't want, but I'd say the same thing goes for the other person as well - that is, they shouldn't get on board with something they don't really want either. It's not that I think things are the way they should be or the way I'd want them either, but I'm just saying what I think about the way the world actually works - and you're right, the right person won't just settle for you - your attractions and values will actually line up and it should feel natural, but unfortunately, many of us don't get to experience this. It's not a matter of being good enough, but a matter of connecting with the right people. The more idiosyncrasies and quirks we have, the more the odds will feel stacked against us!

I didn't know there was any association between Autism and tickling, so that's news to me. I've never sought help and always found ways to manage just enough to get by, so I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I've struggled with depression and anxiety my entire life, always sensing something was wrong with me but never quite sure what it was. If I did seek treatment, I'd probably be diagnosed with either ADHD or Autism, or possibly both. I self-medicated with alcohol for about a decade before finally kicking that vice, and every phase of my life has left me feeling like I'm at least a decade or two behind where I should be in life.
Frankly, I've found that your conversation with @duderino84 has moved into a rather deep level, which even includes a few nuances.

A nuance concerns partnership/marriage. This nuance is not directly relevant to the theme of this thread, but kinda related.
It's definitely important for us to have the potential partners who can not only understand but also embrace our tickle fetish/kink. Such a potential matters our mental health.
However, we need to keep in our minds that the gratification of fetish/kink can hardly be the fundamental part of partnership/marriage. When it comes to partnership/marriage, most ppl definitely have most concern about the fundamental things, which are having family & parenting child(ren) for most ppl.
Therefore, as ppl with tickle fetish/kink, we can hardly expect our potential partners to prioritise gratifying our fetish/kink instead of concerning the fundamental things.

The 2nd nuance is the potential relation between tickle fetish/kink & ADHD/Autism.
I'm a somewhat Autistic ppl with tickle fetish/kink. However, I can hardly find strong validity about the relation above, since most ppl on this site do not seem to have ADHD/Autism...
On the other hand, I'm also curious about the opinions from @rambophat31 and @nayfeliciano. Have you really met some other ppl with ADHD/Autism who are also into tickling?

The 3rd nuance concerns therapy, which has the highest relevance to the theme of this thread.
I'm glad that some ppl here, such as @Leeshy and @MikeMenace , have really had better mental health or at least better handlings of your tickle fetish/kink through your therapies!
However, I still wonder if such therapies are relatively effective for those who can be lees? As a pure ler, I can hardly think about any potential therapy that helps me to handle my fetish fantasy...
And advice for this?
 
The 2nd nuance is the potential relation between tickle fetish/kink & ADHD/Autism.
I'm a somewhat Autistic ppl with tickle fetish/kink. However, I can hardly find strong validity about the relation above, since most ppl on this site do not seem to have ADHD/Autism...
On the other hand, I'm also curious about the opinions from @rambophat31 and @nayfeliciano. Have you really met some other ppl with ADHD/Autism who are also into tickling?

The relationship between neurodivergence and tickling is primarily defined by Predictive Coding, Sensory Gating, and Neural Adaptation.
## 1. Predictive Coding (The "Self-Tickle" Mechanism)
This is the most precise scientific link. It involves the Cerebellum and the Somatosensory Cortex.
* The Neurotypical Model: When the brain initiates a movement (e.g., reaching to touch one's own side), it sends a "Forward Model." This signal predicts the sensation before it happens and cancels out the "surprise." This is why most people cannot tickle themselves; the brain has already muted the sensory feedback.
* The Neurodivergent Variance: In many individuals on the spectrum, this "cancellation" signal is weaker. The brain treats self-generated touch as if it were an external, unexpected stimulus. Consequently, the sensation remains intense, "tickly," or even overwhelming, regardless of who is causing it.
## 2. Sensory Gating (The "Volume Control" Problem)
This relates to how the central nervous system filters out irrelevant environmental data.
* Failure to Inhibit: Most nervous systems perform "sensory gating," which automatically drops the "volume" on repetitive or constant stimuli (like the feeling of a chair or a light breeze).
* The Correlation: In ASD and ADHD, this gating mechanism is often less efficient. A light touch—which is the physical basis of a "tickle"—is not filtered out as "noise." Instead, the brain maintains it as a "high-priority signal." This results in Hyper-reactivity, where a minor tactile input is perceived with a intensity that is disproportionate to the physical stimulus.
## 3. Sensory Adaptation vs. Sensitization
This explains the "persistence" of the sensation over time.
* Neurotypical Adaptation: Usually, if a stimulus is constant, the neurons stop firing as frequently (you "forget" the sensation).
* Neurodivergent Sensitization: Rather than the sensation fading, the nervous system can become more sensitive to it over time. A light, ticklish sensation that starts as a minor distraction can escalate into a "pain-adjacent" or "electrically" uncomfortable experience because the neurons continue to fire at a high rate without hitting a refractory period.
## Summary of Clinical Correlations
| Mechanism | Description | Correlation |
|---|---|---|
| Attenuation | The dampening of self-touch. | Lower in ASD; leads to "Self-Tickling." |
| Nociceptive Overlap | The brain's tendency to process light touch as "threat/pain." | High in ASD/ADHD; causes "Tactile Defensiveness." |
| Signal Priority | The brain's inability to ignore background tactile data. | Core of DSM-5 Criterion B.4 (Hyper-reactivity). |

Just a conversation with Gemini discussing some of the struggles that neurotypicals will have that will make us prone to liking tickling.
 
The relationship between neurodivergence and tickling is primarily defined by Predictive Coding, Sensory Gating, and Neural Adaptation.
## 1. Predictive Coding (The "Self-Tickle" Mechanism)
This is the most precise scientific link. It involves the Cerebellum and the Somatosensory Cortex.
* The Neurotypical Model: When the brain initiates a movement (e.g., reaching to touch one's own side), it sends a "Forward Model." This signal predicts the sensation before it happens and cancels out the "surprise." This is why most people cannot tickle themselves; the brain has already muted the sensory feedback.
* The Neurodivergent Variance: In many individuals on the spectrum, this "cancellation" signal is weaker. The brain treats self-generated touch as if it were an external, unexpected stimulus. Consequently, the sensation remains intense, "tickly," or even overwhelming, regardless of who is causing it.
## 2. Sensory Gating (The "Volume Control" Problem)
This relates to how the central nervous system filters out irrelevant environmental data.
* Failure to Inhibit: Most nervous systems perform "sensory gating," which automatically drops the "volume" on repetitive or constant stimuli (like the feeling of a chair or a light breeze).
* The Correlation: In ASD and ADHD, this gating mechanism is often less efficient. A light touch—which is the physical basis of a "tickle"—is not filtered out as "noise." Instead, the brain maintains it as a "high-priority signal." This results in Hyper-reactivity, where a minor tactile input is perceived with a intensity that is disproportionate to the physical stimulus.
## 3. Sensory Adaptation vs. Sensitization
This explains the "persistence" of the sensation over time.
* Neurotypical Adaptation: Usually, if a stimulus is constant, the neurons stop firing as frequently (you "forget" the sensation).
* Neurodivergent Sensitization: Rather than the sensation fading, the nervous system can become more sensitive to it over time. A light, ticklish sensation that starts as a minor distraction can escalate into a "pain-adjacent" or "electrically" uncomfortable experience because the neurons continue to fire at a high rate without hitting a refractory period.
## Summary of Clinical Correlations
| Mechanism | Description | Correlation |
|---|---|---|
| Attenuation | The dampening of self-touch. | Lower in ASD; leads to "Self-Tickling." |
| Nociceptive Overlap | The brain's tendency to process light touch as "threat/pain." | High in ASD/ADHD; causes "Tactile Defensiveness." |
| Signal Priority | The brain's inability to ignore background tactile data. | Core of DSM-5 Criterion B.4 (Hyper-reactivity). |

Just a conversation with Gemini discussing some of the struggles that neurotypicals will have that will make us prone to liking tickling.
Thank you for presenting the extensive information!
According to the information, the neurodivergent ppl tend to easily get self tickled & have lower capability of resisting tickling.
However, as a person with ASD, I'm definitely better at resisting tickling than average ppl, though I easily feel offensive by some slight touches🤔
 
Thank you for presenting the extensive information!
According to the information, the neurodivergent ppl tend to easily get self tickled & have lower capability of resisting tickling.
However, as a person with ASD, I'm definitely better at resisting tickling than average ppl, though I easily feel offensive by some slight touches🤔
Yea i just thought it was interesting. ...a lot of posting in a couple years about "tickle fetish folk seem strikingly autistic" discussion just made me worry it might be something along the delays, and no, it's just the focusing on or around tickling as a sensory stimulation that we're more likely to experience.
 
Does anyone believe tickling affects mental health. In either negative and/or positive ways. As someone with AuDHD i feel like it helps my mental health. Under the right circumstances, of course. I was just wondering if anyone else felt like it helps or impacts their mental health in good or bad way

Does anyone believe tickling affects mental health. In either negative and/or positive ways. As someone with AuDHD i feel like it helps my mental health. Under the right circumstances, of course. I was just wondering if anyone else felt like it helps or impacts their mental health in good or bad ways.
embracing what you love in general, especially kink... can definitely be great for your mental health. but too much of it can mess with your mental health. a break is always good to balance it out, IMO. 🙏🏽
 
embracing what you love in general, especially kink... can definitely be great for your mental health. but too much of it can mess with your mental health. a break is always good to balance it out, IMO. 🙏🏽
I agree 100%, also you're one of the greats in this community so thanks for commenting.
 
So very interesting topic here and I’d love to weigh in

I’ve sessioned with people before who wanted to try it for the purpose of laughing during or after a difficult time in their lives like losing a loved one or going through a type of depression or just down on their luck and wanted to vent aka tickle someone.

I truly feel tickling/ being tickled in my opinion has shown great leaps of improvement in someone’s mental health whether it be short term or in some cases long term

I think just laughter and the release of endorphins really helps people out and then someone stressed etc and having them tickling someone I feel has helped ppl out too.

Interested to hear others input
 
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