Tickling and relationships

[tickledorange]

I would NEVER stay in a relationship just because of tickling. Id drive that person insane after about a month or so! Nikalakalikalas (Nick) and i do lots of cool stuff together that has nothing to do with tickling (plus hes funny as hell), so theres a lot more things we have fun doing, tickling's just one of them.
Stacy

 

[tman1865]

You stole my idea, you *******. (In the voice of South Park)

Hello All, I'm T, and it's time for me to step out of the shadows. I've been thinking about this topic for about a month now, and was going to post it as my first post, but you beat me. Oh well, great minds and all - Kudos.

YES, I have noticed a STRONG Connection to tickling and relationships!

I'm in my 20's and neither looking to get married and settled down before supper time, nor do I really have a problem meeting girls, so my story is going to be a bit different from most of what I heard posted.

Man, I'm glad that so many people have found true lub here and thanks for sharing all of your Snow White and 7 Dwarves feelings with us (those ones that make us all picture animated birds and deer flocking to sit on our shoulders). I think most of you are still on the "Honeymoon" but good for you.

For me, Tickling is VITAL in a relationship. My Ex-Ex GF, lets call her ZENA, and I may have been engaged by now if she was into tickling, but she wasn't - in the worst way. She's a clinical nymphomaniac, and was willing to do anything that I asked of her sexually, as she'd often remind me, so naturally, I tied her up; and I tickled her; and it she was really ticklish. However, it SUCKED. Cause she hated being tickled so much, that she acted like I was literally torturing her. Like moaning and grunting, and never so much as a giggle that didn't come out through a muffled grunt. If that was my cup of tea, I'd be over at the BDSM Forum. So I dumped her. We're still "friends" though.

I wouldn't have thought that was a big deal, but about a month ago, I meet a girl, lets call her Ragedy Anne, and we hooked up and had GREAT SEX. This Girl has the most amazing body, and so much going for her, she's a real keeper. So we slow things down a bit and start dating, and OMG - it turns out that she's as ticklish as a sack of sand. I was SO DISGUSTED, I mean I lost like 90% of my desire to hook up with her, and this after some GREAT SEX. So I stopped pursuing her and let things fade away. (Yea, I broke it off with her too, so I'm sorry dude, that whole girls always end it theory is bust.)

Well, this back to back repeat experience got me THINKING. Just how important is tickling in my relationships, and how important is it in other ticklephile's relationships as well? (See, I'm so glad this post got posted.)

I asked, the same questions, and here are my answers:

Can I have a relationship without tickling? YES, I have had some GREAT SEX with women that had nothing to do with tickling.

Can I have a relationship based solely on tickling? NO, not really. I got this girl, lets call her the Stalker. She has made it BLATANTLY apparent that I can come stay at her place and have my way with her anytime I want, or don't want for that matter (she's called the stalker for a reason y'all). She's alright, but I'm not sexually attracted to her, but I do know that she's ticklish and I'm POSITIVE that she would let me do whatever I wanted to her. (That guy who talked about the pleasing the man thing was RIGHT ON THE MONEY), but I still don't go over there and tickle her. Now if we worked out something, where I could just tickle her, no strings attached, MAAAAAAAYBE? Tickling of adults is highly sexual to me, and I'm still not sure where I stand with tickling of people I'm not sexually attraced to.

Lastly, most importantly, and the question I'm here more to find an answer to than to answer, is could I marry someone that wasn't ticklish or some other way un-ticklable? WOW, I DON'T KNOW. I REALLY don't know. I believe in opposites attracting, and I believe in Destiny, but not Fate (i.e I believe that strange things happen for a reason, like meeting someone when you're totally lost and ending up married; but not in there being JUST ONE right person for you to marry.) I'd definitely have to give it SERIOUS thought before hand, and I'm being very serious about this. I'd either have to deny a part of myself, or cheat, or work out some kind of special deal; and even then I could never share in what I consider an important bond with "HER."

So, I guess my answer comes in two parts: in word, I don't know, but in action - nope, I tend to hold off and keep looking.

Well, sorry for the long prose here Y'all, but this is a topic close to my heart, and active in my life, and I'd love it if some more people would take some time to help shed some light on it with their personal views and experiences - especially for those ticklephiles who are dating non-ticklephiles of which I have heard none so far.

Peace and stay well, there's a nasty Flu going round.

T
PS - Weak Man (no offense meant), Old age and Treachery always beats out Youth and Strength. Next time you see her coming, hand cuff/slipknot tigh her, and tickle your fill out of her. The pain of the ass kicking to come is only temporary, but the echoes of her schreeching and begging will echo for an Eternity.

 

[Em Es]

Spoken like a true Jersey girl, njjen3953

Assuming the nj in njjen3953 stands for New Jersey, you are a true Garden State gal, saying it straight. I guess I was generalizing when I said the woman usually is the one who leaves. In terms of marriage, statistics show women overwhelmingly are the ones to first file for divorce. But in dating situations, I cannot back up my remark with a statistic. It is certainly true in my life - 95% of the girls I've dated got rid of me before I could get rid of them.

 

[trepak]

I have to say 'TMAN 1865'

It seems that you've got a second fetish. You are definately into women with weird names 😀


(I wonder if there's any video-producers working on that - could be some new chance for Jeff, TIB and the others.....maybe you should think about this)

 

[trepak]

And to Mr. EM ES........

Your problem is very easy to cure:
Just get faster. You only have to get rid of your girlfriend as long as your relationship is in perfect harmony - so there won't be a chance for her to beat you.
I'm glad I could help - no need to thank me........🙂

 

[Knox The Hatter]

95% of the time the girl leaves you first! Good grief, that's terrible, and very telling. You're gonna have to turn those numbers around! If Barry Bonds had numbers like that, he'd be punching lottery tickets at Cumberland Farms...🙂 😀 😛

 

[njjen3953]

Re: Spoken like a true Jersey girl, njjen3953

Assuming the nj in njjen3953 stands for New Jersey, you are a true Garden State gal, saying it straight. It is certainly true in my life - 95% of the girls I've dated got rid of me before I could get rid of them.

Yes. I am originally from NJ and I usually say what is on my mind.

I am not going to assume that you actually want a lasting relationship, but if you do, perhaps thinking of how to keep them rather than get rid of them is the 1st step.

Remember, what you did to get the the girl, you need to keep doing to keep her. 😉

 

[terorizer]

I did meet a woman over the internet due to our love of tickling. We also shared a love of love and time would reveal, we shared little else. In the end, when the relationship dissolved, not having the person who shared the love of tickling was not as hard as not having the bond with that person who shared the love of love.

I've never broken up with anyone because of a lack of tickling in the relationship, nor have I stayed too long because of tickling alone. The latter would be virtually impossible for me, because in an intimate relationship, tickling is one way I convey the depth of my feeling, and if those feelings were lacking, so would the desire to tickle.

It's all kinda curious and convoluted for me though. What I mean is, those of you who are single or have been single understand that there are times when you have urges and desires and the short of it is, it REALLY sucks to be single! LOL But the funny thing is, I think it might suck even more to be single and tickleeless, when THOSE urges and desires manifest themselves. :- ) Casual sex has never appealed to me, but because non-sexual tickling is almost as much fun for me, I wonder if there were a platonic relationship with tickling in it, how would that go? Ahh, things to ponder.

 

[kis123]

Dear terorizer;

Let me know when you find that platonic tickling relationship, then send the clone to Ohio!!!😀 I'm not into casual relationships either and have been pretty much to myself for a long time. It gets very lonely sometimes. I have work, school, and my kids only on the weekends (for reasons I don't care to share presently), but still find myself lonely sometimes.

I enjoy reading everyone's posts (even the ones I don't necessarily agree with) because I've found a group of people that I don't feel wierd around. No one in my circle of family or friends knows about my love of tickling, and I probably will never tell. Too straight-laced to understand. They'd just rather remain cold and detached.

Until I fininsh school (sep 04) I really don't need to get involved with anyone else. It takes time to cultivate a good relationship and it wouldn't be fair to take up someone else's time when I don't have the time to give. In the meantime, a good tickle buddy wouldn't be such a bad idea😉 ...........

 

[terorizer]

Dear terorizer;

Let me know when you find that platonic tickling relationship, then send the clone to Ohio!!!😀 I'm not into casual relationships either and have been pretty much to myself for a long time.

I'll tell you what Kis123, if a ticklephile who lives near me and we develop a relationship that allows us to hang out regularly, enjoy each other's company and tickling and not fall in love and become more than just friends... (not that it's impossible, because I think I've met a couple who happen to not live near me).. but if she should appear, then there are a couple of things I have to do before cloning, namely, going to the bank, then to Reno, Tahoe, Vegas and the local quickie mart for a lotto ticket, cuz that would be some luck! lol

 

[kis123]

Well terorizer,

Take all the tickling time you need prior to cloning. Then send your clones to the Ohio area. We could use some fun in this stuffy state!😀

 

[kis123]

Terorizer, I see your point and this is why I'm by myself right now! That type of relationship would be pure nirvana for me. I had a relationship that ended two years ago. I filled that empty time with school, friends, kids. Although I miss that person and could rekindle that relationship with a phone call, I know that in the end, it would not be best for me or him.

But I still like my cloning idea😀 !

 

[terorizer]

Well terorizer,

Take all the tickling time you need prior to cloning. Then send your clones to the Ohio area. We could use some fun in this stuffy state!😀

Ohio??? Some of my favorite fun people are there! Shucks, maybe I could just clone you all!?!?!?

 

[TicklishSinner]

I can't say that i have had a realtionship based on just tickling, but i have had a few boyfriends who didnt mind it..but if tickling is the whole reason your together you wont last...but if thats how it starts off then you gain more knowledge of your common interests you are lucky! But like i said before just a common fetish interest thats like saying hey i like tickling everyone on the forum date me..it doesnt work that well (dont take me littereally just me being stupid) in my opinion i cant see having a relationship work solely..hehe..on an interest in tickling.

 

[chrisheaven]

It's just one aspect of one's character really.

 

[lrtk36]

reply

i have been married 30 years to my wife, who has no intrest whatsoever in tickling, she hates it, in any way shape or form, i love it, in all shapes and forms, but, we're still here and still married because of our mutual intrests and love for each other, so the answer to the wuestion is no haven't broken up just because she's not into it.

 

[tman1865]

A liitle more detail please.

After all of the wonderful responses, nearly everyone agrees that Love is necessary for every truly meaningful relationship.

Now, lets get to the SOLE of the issue. For those of you in relationships with partners who aren't into tickling, HOW DO YOU MAKE IT WORK?

Do you just confine your lusts to Cyber-tickling here?
Do your mates make like sacrifices and give you "priveleges" over them? Or better yet, do they allow you to seek RL priveleges outside of your relationship for the express purpose of feeding your need?
Or scariest of all, do you just endlessly thurst for the rest of your life?

I'd really like to hear some of this valuable insider experience from our resident experts like MR. 30 year marriage. (not picking on you, you're just the only one I recall.)

And from our single people - you're not really looking for tickling, your looking for LOVE." GREAT. I hear ya, I wish you all the fireworks that Niagra Falls has to offer when you find it, but how do you expect to deal with no more tickling if your mate isn't into it or isn't ticklish? Do you plan to just secretly keep on looking? To Cyber? To Cheat? To Beg? What?

I'm sure that love will conquer all just like in the movies, but HOW do you foresee this happening? I'm looking for a little more insight, thought, and detail if you all can, please.

Thanks, I look forward to reading your answers.

T

 

[Knox The Hatter]

She thinks I'm nuts, but she loves me anyway.

 

[Mimi]

I, also, am about to echo many of the posts made here by fellow TMFers who met their love-interests online via their love for tickling.

Lazarus and I met online due to our love for tickling, and after meeting in person and discovering how many other things we had in common as well, we have now developed a serious relationship (engaged, and planning to marry in 2005).

We BOTH came from long term relationships (11 year marriage for me, 7 year marriage for him), where tickling was tolerated, but not a shared interest. In my case, my husband willingly obliged me in my fetish, but his lack of genuine interest in it made it difficult for me to be completely open about it, and prevented me from participating in it as much as I would have liked. I never felt 100% comfortable with it while with him. In Lazarus's case, his wife was eagerly a willing ticklee for him during their courtship. Once they were married though, she made it clear that she hated it, and from that point forward, expected him to refrain from ever tickling her again.

Both of us stayed in these relationships despite our lack of shared tickling interest with our spouses. Eventually, it was not only the lack of shared tickling, but the lack of other shared interests as well as the lack of love in our relationships that drove us to the door.

Both of us would have likely stayed in our marriages if other aspects aside from tickling were strong. It was a matter of both of us being with the wrong person, on many different levels that brought things to a halt.

When we found one another, it was based on a shared interest in tickling, and only began as a planned tickling session. It grew to much more than that, after the first weekend alone. Sharing our love for tickling was wonderful, but upon discovering we had virtually every NON-tickling related opinion and interest in common pushed us down a path of no looking back. We each managed to find that one special someone that inhabits every single little detail you desire in a hopeful special someone. Even if tickling was void from our relationship, we would still be very happy with one another. Tickling is merely the icing on the cake for us.

So, in short, you CAN have a relationship void of tickling, and still be very happy. It just takes a shared love of other, equally important aspects, to make it work.

A relationship based on tickling alone, however, in my opinion, has no chance of survival.

Mimi

 

[tman1865]

Thanks Mimi

Now that's what I'm talking about. 😀

 

[terorizer]

Re: A liitle more detail please.

And from our single people - you're not really looking for tickling, your looking for LOVE." GREAT. I hear ya, I wish you all the fireworks that Niagra Falls has to offer when you find it, but how do you expect to deal with no more tickling if your mate isn't into it or isn't ticklish? Do you plan to just secretly keep on looking? To Cyber? To Cheat? To Beg? What?

I'm sure that love will conquer all just like in the movies, but HOW do you foresee this happening? I'm looking for a little more insight, thought, and detail if you all can, please.

Thanks, I look forward to reading your answers.

T

I've been single for a while now and I must admit this is something that I've thought about from time to time. Since my last relationship was with "one of us" and I experienced a level of intimacy and openess I had previously not thought possible, I sometimes wonder if I could be "satisfied" without that level of intimacy and openess. Mind you, the physical tickling and play isn't an issue for me, because I have a broad definition of what tickling is, and I'm positive I couldn't be in love with a woman who doesn't like touching and laughter. For me it's more a matter of her understanding that tickling is another way of communicating my feelings, my love, my thoughts, etc. Sure she may be ticklish...sure she may enjoy being tickled on some level, great or small... but without feeling it herself, how could she know what a tickle from me conveys?

Ultimately, though tickling is a big part of me, there's much more to me than just the love of it and I feel if I felt fufilled in enough other ways, I could be content. I'm not the cheating type and again I doubt I could ever end up with a woman who couldn't enjoy tickling on some level, so I don't worry or lament this at all, but it does make me wonder.