Tickling forum "pm" manners.....

[chode]

I am curious. Many people have told me that once they have begun to contact a person on the forum through pm, and then through yahoo or aol messenger, that the person sometimes just totaly ignores them. Say...they wont hear fromthem for like a month when other people do? So knowing several people are talking to someone right now, that is ignoring you, does that make for bad manners? You didnt make them mad, and you have no clue why they dont respond.

Im really not asking for myself. I dont pm anyone usually, only if they send me one first. But i am curious about what all of you think about that one. Sorry if it isnt clear enough, i can make it more understandable if its requested.

 

[TMF Jeff]

Personally I think it's bad manners to pursue contact if you've been ignored. Nobody can force anyone else to want to talk to them, and you have to give them the space to decide for themselves what they want to do. People could have a million possible reasons for why they choose not to follow up, and it might not be anybody else's business but their own. Pursuing it after one contact has been ignored or refused seems really pushy to me, and inappropriate.

 

[chode]

Actually, thats the exact advice i gave to a friend. They still think its down right rude. I say, why waste your time on someone who obviously doesnt want to talk to you.

 

[Mitchell]

I agree with both Jeff and Yg on this one. If I PM someone, and they ignore me, I leave well enough alone. From that reaction I conclude that the person either might not check their PM's, doesnt answer PM's in general, or doesnt want to talk to me, for whatever reason. Even if I dont like the reaction, and may think it is rude to ignore a PM, that is their right, and I dont persue it with a second contact for two reasons. A. I think repeated PM's of someone who doesnt want to be contacted is harrassment, and, B. That person probably isnt worth my time, and I move on to others who are. Contact needs to be a two way street, and with so many members of the forum, Iam certain to find those members who want to talk to me.
One contact is enough for me, unless the person replies, and we get into a dialouge that results in multiple contacts. Having been a forum member for as long as I have, no one person is worth repeated contacts or reprimands by the mods for harrassment if they dont respond. One contact, yes, is acceptable, and after that, it is the receipient's choice whether to reply or not.

Mitch

 

[chode]

" That person probably isnt worth my time, and I move on to others who are."


Well said.

 

[vampirecult]

I have had that happend to me before just like what you described yjgfn. Not really so much through this website yet (but through other forums online that i post at). But i don't really try to let silly things like that get to me. After all it's online and for right now i don't any attention on meeting anybody online in Real Life. So i move on to the next person or pm the next person etc..... If the person doesn't like me for who i am or what i'm into then they can f*ck off thier not worth my time.

 

[Sultrybrunette]

I think it is completely rude and uncalled for. Let me put it this way. Say a guy contacts me, chats with me, asks for my yahoo IM, chats with me on there. That tells me that he has interest in me. Why go through all that trouble to then turn around and ignore me? I HATE people that play games. If I am not interested in talking to you at any point I will not ask in the first place. Its common sense which obviously quit a few people on here seem to be lacking. If I get ignored I sure would like to know why? Why would you act all interested in me then all of a sudden ignore me? Is it ok do that in real life or just the internet? What ever happened to manners and thinking about how your actions affect the other person??? Obviously they left a long time ago.

 

[chode]

Seems like the internet has different rules.

 

[RChello]

hmmm myabe you shouldn't...

ask if they have a ticklish anus via pm....kidddddding🙂

 

[vampirecult]

Some people online are just stupid and don't use there brain that often. If hardly ever.

 

[dtrell]

I think it is completely rude and uncalled for. Let me put it this way. Say a guy contacts me, chats with me, asks for my yahoo IM, chats with me on there. That tells me that he has interest in me. Why go through all that trouble to then turn around and ignore me? I HATE people that play games. If I am not interested in talking to you at any point I will not ask in the first place. Its common sense which obviously quit a few people on here seem to be lacking. If I get ignored I sure would like to know why? Why would you act all interested in me then all of a sudden ignore me? Is it ok do that in real life or just the internet? What ever happened to manners and thinking about how your actions affect the other person??? Obviously they left a long time ago.

VERY well said SB...

 

[chode]

No way chello. Thats a face to face question for sure.

 

[marcusb]

I think if you're being ignored you should just let it go. At the same time, if you had active communication with someone and then they, for no apparent reason, stop talking to you then that's just plain rude.

IMO, if you don't want to talk to somone who you've been talking with in the past at least have the common courtesy to tell them so.

 

[chode]

I agree dude. Rude..............

 

[TikleBelly]

I'm ignoring you.

Yes, I'm still ignoring you.

 

[vampirecult]

Since we're talking about internet talk here

I also hate little pre-teen and teens being ALL horny and perverted online. Gosh i swear i just want to reach through the computer screen and slap every one of them..... All thier stupid horny sex talk all the time non stop.

I have alot of pet peeves about people. And that is one of them.

 

[chode]

Who you ignoring belly?

 

[tommytikl]

Here's a question...

How do you know you are being ignored?!
Just curious...

 

[vampirecult]

Here's a question...

How do you know you are being ignored?!
Just curious...

When the person NEVER IM's you back (if your using an instant messenger) or if the person NEVER e-mails you back again (if your using e-mail) or if a person STOPS replying back to your private messages that you send them


Once you stop hearing from that person forever. Then that is a good sign and bet that they never wanted to talk with you in the first place or they thought of you as boring or what have you. So they all of a sudden just stopped talking to you

ps. Also thier are some instant messenger programs that you can download to tell who Blocked you or if another person has Blocked you from thier buddy list

 

[Oddjob0226]

Maybe they are not ignoring you and there is something wrong with their computer service. That's been happing hear lately! Or they use an outrdated Imac, like I do at work, and can't navigate anywhere. Or a jealous creep on the other end is deleating PMs.

And what's so good about the ignorer that they can't tell the ignoree "No thank you?" once - and both sides leave it at that?

 

[chickles_:)]

Hiya
Okay, time for true confessions *gulp*

I do admit i need to be better at replying - as some of you know.
But i have to say one thing, and i know i'm not alone in this.

As much as i agree it's totally rude to engage people in contact especially e-mail and IM chat (it seems to me that the more comprehensive the contact becomes -such as giving out e-mail and IM addies- the greater the level of commitment to the contact one expresses, though it could be equally committed with just PMing) and then blow them off without so much as a "by your leave". If someone does decide that he or she doesn't want to continue it's the minimally decent thing to say as much.

But and here's my personal qualifier, the fact is that I, and i'm sure some others, have many other commitments and involvements besides this forum - wonderful as it is. I find that sometimes days can go by when i come home from work, or some outing and flop into bed sans energy to even download my e-mail!

If it's any consolation I do feel guilty about not getting back to all my PM friends. *nods nods*

I guess i just wanted to add that into the mix. 🙂 Maybe there are others who feel as i do.

Many blessings,
Chickles_🙂

 

[dtrell]

i agree with that chickles....but what if you have plenty of time to post on here for 3 or 4 hours a night, and still dont reply to any IMs or PMs or emails? i can understand if you were to have no computer time at all....

 

[dtrell]

Maybe they are not ignoring you and there is something wrong with their computer service. That's been happing hear lately! Or they use an outrdated Imac, like I do at work, and can't navigate anywhere. Or a jealous creep on the other end is deleating PMs.

And what's so good about the ignorer that they can't tell the ignoree "No thank you?" once - and both sides leave it at that?

youre absolutely right oddjob....if you are interested in the person, find 5 minutes a day to say hi....just because 5 million people PM or IM you, you have to have a priority list of who you are interested in at that immediate time...and give them a few minutes.......if youre not, then tell them just what you said, and dont string em along.

 

[chode]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 

[Ticklshchic03]

For me, I just dont have enough time to deal with my internet tickling stuff. I have alot going on in my normal life but what pisses me off about PM and IM is that I have said BLATENTLY in both profiles that I'm not interested in male yet every male seems to think that they are the exception to that rule... "Oh but i'm not like them" is something I hear all to often... its because of people like that, that I dont take internet friends too seriously.... plus there are alot of lyers out there....