When & How did you tell your partner about your tickling fetish?

[oxoforgotso]

I just started seeing a girl and I was wondering if there was a recommended way to tell her about my tickling/foot fetish? I feel like coming out about the tickling fetish would be easier because I know most girls (that aren't into this) from what I know, tend to find tickling weird and feet, gross. Especially there own.

Any stories or advice would be appreicated! 🙂

Not entirely related but last night on the phone she said out right that she loved back tickles. And I quote: "Give me all the tickles." Plus she has the cutest giggle too.

 

[TigerChick22]

I am a girl, and I told my S/O about 6 months ago. I was SO completely nervous because I hadn't told anyone, but I just told him that I had a secret, and that it was a fetish. He started basically playing 20 questions, guessing until he got it. It was the best secret I've ever admitted. Couldn't have imagined a better reaction! If this girl is cool, open, and genuine, I see no harm done with just coming out with it during a nightly chat. Good luck!! Keep us posted!!

 

[porcelaindoll2]

I met my now fiancee at a local play party and off of FetLife. The first play party I ever saw him at we hardly spoke to each other. He said later that he wanted too, but I was busy playing, I played almost non-stop the whole night with a group of people, and he didn't want to interrupt my scene(Plus he was also afraid to jump in since we didn't know each other.). I can't remember if he wrote me or I wrote him after the first party, but I do remember writing him saying that I was interested in sounding after I had watched him do a demo on himself the first party I saw him. We started chatting and at the next play party we went to(They were held once a month) we hung out and played. It was at that play party I told him I was into tickling. Later on in the night after he had sounded me he put me in a hogtie via an attachment he had for his leather cuffs while I was naked and tickled me. He told me afterwords he thought it was hot, he was into snesation play, and he was a bit of a service top. I didn't tell him about my foot fetish because I had already felt he'd be against worshiping my feet. The next times we met I met him at the house he was renting at the time. Him and I pretty much had lust/love at first sight and we had sex the first time I was over at his place. During one time we were having sex where my legs were up in the air with my feet near his face he began to suck on my toes. I came really fast and hard. Afterwords he even point blank asked me why I didn't ask him to do that? He said he done some research on my profile and he could tell I had a huge foot fetish. I told him that every guy I had played/dated in the area were completely against the idea of foot stuff, so I assumed he was like the rest. Plus I had researched his profile as well and saw nothing foot related. I am so glad I found him!

 

[ElFewja]

Don't be nervous because this is who you are. If you're nervous then I think you don't accept it yourself, or at least worry about society's standards of normal.

Don't mentally use the words fetish or obsession. This is something you like, this interests you. This is what you like to do, right? That's it.

Do you care -- honestly care -- what people think about you? You can't change them, they're always going to be judgmental, right? Doesn't matter what you are, who you are, they'll judge you, so don't give a fuck about their opinions. Be who you are. I think a lot of people have confidence issues because they're concerned about being accepted, but really, that shouldn't matter at all. Whether or not you are by society. Fuck 'em.

Now I say all these brave and bold things here but man, the last time I told a girl (been like 8 years granted) I was nervous as shit and backed out like twice lol. I think I can handle it better now -- going to find out in a few weeks -- but yeah, handle it simply. This is an interest. I like this. Tickling is an interest, I like tickling. It's fun.

If you act weird or say weird things, that's what makes it weird. If she's not so interested, that's for her. She doesn't have to be so don't force it. Explain that it's important to you if you have to but be open to going slow for her because you probably will have to.

I sometimes wonder if everything I write makes sense. I'm terrible at these sorts of things, but that's my advice. You're confident and accepting of yourself, so act like it, you know?

 

[ShesTroubleTeHe]

i would try to be subtle and cute about it that way you can get their reactions but in a fun way i suppose

 

[UpSide2Gravity]

Truth or dare is how I do it every time. They always pick truth so I ask them, "What's the weirdest aspect about you?" They then respond and ask you the same question in which you answer with your tickling fetish. I've never received a negative reaction using this method.

 

[teamtickleguy]

I've always found it much easier to explain my fetish for tickling than it is to explain my fetish for feet and shoeplay, and have therefore only ever told partners about the tickling side.

I would try to incorporate it into a wider two-way discussion about the things that each of you find arousing and the little things that you like about each other - it is quite easy and acceptable to mention that you find it cute/sexy that she is ticklish and that this is one thing that turns you on about her - her laugh, the feel of her body when it's tickled etc - you can joke with her that you'll tickle her from time to time, but stress you'll always stop when she wants you to.

The fact she's already mentioned enjoying the back tickles gives you a good starting point and a reference point for introducing the idea into conversation - it's already a small aspect of tickling that you can enjoy together as it's clearly pleasurable for both of you.

You could go further by describing it as a fetish and talking about being part of an online community (which can be a useful way of demonstrating how common it is to someone who does get a bit weirded out when you tell them), but I think this is best judged by you as someone's reaction to this can largely depend on their experience, opinions and awareness of the fetish scene and other such lesser mentioned sexual activities.

As for WHEN to tell her, I think this is something you'll sense when the time is right. All relationships move at a different pace, so just keep it in mind for the right conversation, the right moment. There's no rush.

Hope that helps
TTG

 

[blondler2]

Usually by the time I tell them, they've already figured it out based on the abnormally high amount of tickling they receive.

 

[oxoforgotso]

Thanks for all the stories, advice and support, everyone! I haven't brought it up yet but in a phone conversation the other night she did bring up that she likes being "man-handled" which I think is a good sign. I am also pretty into bondage and I love the idea of tying her up and her being tied up in general. I think I could talk about that first more comfortably and probably ease into the tickling talk especially since she does like being tickled on some level. If she was down with it that would be amazing but I am not gonna be all that sad if she isn't. Bonus points if she wants to tickle torture me as well at some point, right? 😉

 

[ticklehound]

I agree with most of the thoughts above; that you have to comfortable yourself about it, and let it show by saying it nonchalantly or subtly. With my partner, I knew I cared about her a lot & wanted to be with her long-term, so she needs to know that I enjoy tickling and being tickled. It did help that there are other issues that we have to deal with (mostly family drama), so that tickling is a minor thing in comparison.

In any event, I tickled her playfully a lot in the first few weeks we were together (and still do as much as I can). She likes it a little (the playful, light, sensual tickles) but not the intense stuff. And she can give as good as she gets, which I really like being tickled by her.

Sooo, when I finally decided to tell her, it was easy, because she already knows I like tickling her, because that's what I've been doing. Now, the reason I told her, was because I wanted to tie her up and really tickle her. She took it really well, especially the part where I told her she can tie me up first.

In the end, you have to have an "Yea, I really like tickling. It makes me happy and turns me on. No big deal." feeling about the situation. If you have to fake suppressing your enthusiasm, so be it for now. As time goes on, you let her discover more and more things about you., and if she doesn't run away, you got a keeper.

Hope it helps...

 

[gilmourwaters]

I never hid my fetishes ( feet and tickling) from any of my gfs in my life. Hell pretty much everyone who knew me knew! Most my female friends thought it was cute and or hot and I was treated to many spontaneous fetish experiences. ESPECIALLY through my college years! My female friends would regularly slip there feet in my lap to mess with me. They let me tickle them..and I got it back! The night I met my now wife I told her and we were in a bar / club. How did she respond? By slipping off her shoes and putting her feet in my lap to be tickled! We were sitting at a table/booth so it was easy......NEVER HIDE YOUR FETISH!

 

[bestmed]

She never did. I don't think she would have been very receptive.

 

[mellon_collie]

The relationship I am in atm was the first time in my life that I have been open about it from the very start and it has never been reciprocated this well. She loves pedicures and foot massages and her mind is basically blown by the fact that they are suddenly free. She had no experience with foot/tickle play so I eased her in gently and now she loves to have her feet tickled and feathered! Plus, the ticklegasm. The first time I tickled her soles while she had an orgasm during oral sex she said she came harder and longer than any other time in her life. Now she basically demands it!

This is the first time my kinks haven't just been a stressful knot in my stomach during a relationship and it's because I was just honest about it from the beginning.