Being a Lee across time is something that I want to cherish and strengthen. It’s such a big part of my life and so I want to make the most of every single inch of this fetish.
Hated finding out… Hormonal changes can actually decrease the t#%kle response as you age, which could make you like being Tworded less. However, there is a big psychological aspect to what causes us to respond one way or the other. I defy age (I am a little after all!)
Now, I haven’t noticed any changes really.. but I don’t want to ever ever ever even come close to any change in sensitivity- unless it’s to become more sensitive. I mean, who would I be if I lost this part of myself?
Something I have thought about is seeing the same t#%kleR again and again. It can be comforting, reassuring… because you know them. You know when they will stop, how far they will take it. You know what they normally say, and what techniques they use.
This sounds good… but I think it creates a level of security that detracts from the “threat” of being t#%kle tortured. After all, a t#%klee’s response to this interaction is linked to their body’s security system … to alert them to external stimuli which may pose a threat.
Just like you can’t t#%kle yourself… Somewhere in your brain, a prediction is made about the sensation your hand will produce, and that prediction suppresses the t#%kling response. While we aren’t mind readers, we can become less surprised by the same threat and same routine once we become very familiar with exactly what will happen.
The other consideration is that having a relationship with someone means you see them when they are weak, sad, exposed… these factors create the total impression a Lee has of their Ler. It will influence whether or not the Ler is seen as a real torturer… or seen as just someone who finds arousal from “acting the part.”
I find this whole thing very fascinating.
The more a Lee is exposed to sessions where they do not feel the “threat” of their Ler and are reinforced with “surviving” the experience … the more their brain feels safer and safer during each corresponding session.
So a pair needs to consider how they might recapture the surprise and uncertainty in their sessions. How can they build on their internal perception of the dominant partner as a “threat”? How can they build on their own sense of vulnerability?
For me - my first action was to stop easily using the word t#%kle. I never ever say it out loud. I always remind myself how it might make me blush, it might be obvious that I have a fetish… what if it causes someone to ask me WHERE I am weak? What if someone actually then tries to do it? What would I ever do then?
Thoughts are powerful. Words are powerful.
I try to sensor the word t#%kle whenever I use it from the perspective of a Lee or victim. That word belongs to the Lers and Doms of my world. They hold it over me.
The next thing I did was meditation/hypnosis on t#%kling. Creating tracks to listen to, asking Lers to create them for me. These tracks I listen to while touching myself. This means my mind will associate the word… the threat… the torture of t#%kling… with pleasure.
Literally I am training my body every day… to be a Lee.
Now some people think that it’s not a good thing if a fetishist cannot climax without their fetish being included. That it makes it more difficult for them to have intimate connections to others. This may be true - but … I honestly don’t care! The things that feel good to me… they just feel soo good that I don’t mind needing them.
In fact
I want to need them.
I need to be t#%kled so badly that I go to bed thinking about it.
I wake up thinking about it.
If I get bored… I start thinking about it.
If I get anxious.. I start thinking about it.
If I get scared… I start thinking about it.
If I’m at work… yep- I’m still thinking about it.
Do you know… if I’m talking to you - YES YOU - I’ll be thinking about it.
And I’m okay with that. I’m a little Lee and I LOVE it. I want it. I need it. I’m just soooo obsessed with it. The way to my heart is not through my stomach… it’s wriggles across my belly
belly button, ribs, sides, knees, thighs… feet, toes …
Don’t tell anyone
I mean, it’s a secret but it’s not really a secret. It’s something I write about constantly but in person … if you spoke to me in person … oh gosh, I would just about freeze up with red cheeks and tingly warm all over gosh don’t notice how badly I need this look it’s all over my face.
Okay I’ll stop now.
Wait - what was this entry even about? Haha
Thanks for reading if you got this far
Hated finding out… Hormonal changes can actually decrease the t#%kle response as you age, which could make you like being Tworded less. However, there is a big psychological aspect to what causes us to respond one way or the other. I defy age (I am a little after all!)
Now, I haven’t noticed any changes really.. but I don’t want to ever ever ever even come close to any change in sensitivity- unless it’s to become more sensitive. I mean, who would I be if I lost this part of myself?
Something I have thought about is seeing the same t#%kleR again and again. It can be comforting, reassuring… because you know them. You know when they will stop, how far they will take it. You know what they normally say, and what techniques they use.
This sounds good… but I think it creates a level of security that detracts from the “threat” of being t#%kle tortured. After all, a t#%klee’s response to this interaction is linked to their body’s security system … to alert them to external stimuli which may pose a threat.
Just like you can’t t#%kle yourself… Somewhere in your brain, a prediction is made about the sensation your hand will produce, and that prediction suppresses the t#%kling response. While we aren’t mind readers, we can become less surprised by the same threat and same routine once we become very familiar with exactly what will happen.
The other consideration is that having a relationship with someone means you see them when they are weak, sad, exposed… these factors create the total impression a Lee has of their Ler. It will influence whether or not the Ler is seen as a real torturer… or seen as just someone who finds arousal from “acting the part.”
I find this whole thing very fascinating.
The more a Lee is exposed to sessions where they do not feel the “threat” of their Ler and are reinforced with “surviving” the experience … the more their brain feels safer and safer during each corresponding session.
So a pair needs to consider how they might recapture the surprise and uncertainty in their sessions. How can they build on their internal perception of the dominant partner as a “threat”? How can they build on their own sense of vulnerability?
For me - my first action was to stop easily using the word t#%kle. I never ever say it out loud. I always remind myself how it might make me blush, it might be obvious that I have a fetish… what if it causes someone to ask me WHERE I am weak? What if someone actually then tries to do it? What would I ever do then?
Thoughts are powerful. Words are powerful.
I try to sensor the word t#%kle whenever I use it from the perspective of a Lee or victim. That word belongs to the Lers and Doms of my world. They hold it over me.
The next thing I did was meditation/hypnosis on t#%kling. Creating tracks to listen to, asking Lers to create them for me. These tracks I listen to while touching myself. This means my mind will associate the word… the threat… the torture of t#%kling… with pleasure.
Literally I am training my body every day… to be a Lee.
Now some people think that it’s not a good thing if a fetishist cannot climax without their fetish being included. That it makes it more difficult for them to have intimate connections to others. This may be true - but … I honestly don’t care! The things that feel good to me… they just feel soo good that I don’t mind needing them.
In fact
I want to need them.
I need to be t#%kled so badly that I go to bed thinking about it.
I wake up thinking about it.
If I get bored… I start thinking about it.
If I get anxious.. I start thinking about it.
If I get scared… I start thinking about it.
If I’m at work… yep- I’m still thinking about it.
Do you know… if I’m talking to you - YES YOU - I’ll be thinking about it.
And I’m okay with that. I’m a little Lee and I LOVE it. I want it. I need it. I’m just soooo obsessed with it. The way to my heart is not through my stomach… it’s wriggles across my belly
belly button, ribs, sides, knees, thighs… feet, toes …Don’t tell anyone
I mean, it’s a secret but it’s not really a secret. It’s something I write about constantly but in person … if you spoke to me in person … oh gosh, I would just about freeze up with red cheeks and tingly warm all over gosh don’t notice how badly I need this look it’s all over my face.
Okay I’ll stop now.
Wait - what was this entry even about? Haha
Thanks for reading if you got this far
