As is expected HDS remains slow to reply. A long while of collecting my own thoughts and memories seemed in order. Despite having the MCAT exam on Saturday this was easily either the best weekend of my life or tied for best with NHLee. Even if it comes back that I did deplorably on that test it won't touch the awesome. Now, memories that have surfaced for me ...
Mistress Aura and mattresses
We discovered this weekend that Mistress Aura's ultimate enemy is the humble mattress. As any who have seen me tickled will attest, I don't stay still. The exact opposite, in fact. Right after I arrived it became time for me to suffer, with Jo and Amanda (or one of 'em, at least) being the evil, evil assailants. Poor JPie's bed was destroyed in the process, sheets strewn everywhere and the mattress bared. Mistress Aura comes in and starts freaking out over the fact that we were touching bare mattress, trying to cover it with the sheets. Vampires have garlic; Aura has mattresses. Maybe if I carry one of those Tempur-Pedic material samples in my pocket I can ward her off next time.
The Boob Train
Oh yeah, and the Boob train.. Poor DSL. LOL
omfg! Yes! Poor DSL. Just laying there all exhausted while a group of girls feel each other up.
Okay, some of ya'll may be wondering about this. After a few isolated attacks from some of the girls (Jo, Mondy), five of 'em seemed to decide I needed attention. Who knows why. So Jo, Mondy, Gin, Cindy and Cassi took up positions and had at it for the better part of an hour and a half, I believe. Of special note was Cassi's expression during all this. The other four girls took positions at my arms and legs and Cassi sat at the head of the bed and attacked my foot. Well, she was sitting there with the most adorably gleeful expression, like a kid handed the most awesome toy possible. She wouldn't even respond vocally, just smiling and ignoring all of us as she did her work. I can't even describe it properly. But it was awesome.
But, the train itself. When they were done with me and I lay there exhausted it somehow was decided that a group groping was in order. Each of them put their hands inside the shirt of another and started feeling each other up in a great "train of boobs". Magnificent sight to behold, let me tell you. Best of all was when Gin (Euphoricy) stuck her hand in Cindy's (Glamorous) shirt. If I remember correctly, her reaction was to blurt out either "Oh my God" or "Holy shit" or something similar. Anyone who has met Cindy will instantly know why, eh?
Then poor Myriads walked back in (He'd been observing) and did a bit of a "what the hell" upon seeing the absurd image of one exhausted HDS surrounded by a greedily groping group of gorgeous and glamorous girls. Everybody ride the Boob Train!
KrazieDog isn't black
K-Dawg: Wasn't black... (Left me shocked and disappointed.)
Okay, apparently I wasn't I the only one who pictured K-Dawg as an ancient, wizened African American Cajun from the depths of the Bayou. I hear his voice and turn to see ... white? Blew my tiny mind all away and I
still don't think it's coming back. This is a PSA from HDS, echoing others: KrazieDog is not black.
Jo's hogtie
Oh, and I got out of my hog tie in 23 minutes and change. Thank you DSL for keeping me from losing my patience too much. And
Aura for making me laugh and breaking my concentration!
Jo and Mistress Aura apparently made a wager. Aura would hogtie Jo and give her one hour to get herself out of it. If Jo won all she got was the right to say she won; I don't recall what Jo's punishment was to be if she lost but it wasn't pretty, I remember that much. Well, Aura set her up on the bed and we started the clock. I was recording video for Lee while she went to receive the awesomeness that is a Danimal's Special Massage (I hope it came out alright, the video that is) and Jo set to trying to escape. Almost immediately she surprised the heck out of Aura by turning over and getting into a position of being able to really work on her bonds. I wish I'd gotten a shot of her face right then, for it was perfect.
As we laughed about later (and during), Jo concentrated hard on one set of ropes, trying to get them undone, and yet repeatedly getting her arm all tangled up in them. She'd pull one thread a few inches at a time with her barely-free fingers and then throw it to the side only to discover it slipped down her arm again. Hilarious to watch, let me tell you. But, she did do it, escaping after 23 minutes and 17 seconds as I recall. So proud of ya, JoJo. Then you go and get pwned later and squander it all.
Danimal's coworkers
Sunday night I went with Lee and Mondy to sit in their room for a time. Danimal made an entrance later and he and Lee sang the most amazing duet of "Baby, It's Cold Outside". You two are seriously amazing. Then poor Dan gets a call and apparently he has phonephail with incoming calls, for he picks up and says "You know Dan can't hear his incoming calls" to dead silence. While waiting for a text message he predicts that his coworkers, stuck at work without a key to lock up, are calling for salvation. Sure enough, that's what it was. Took poor Danimal away from us (although not before he took a grizzly-sized bite out of my shoulder
), and at midnight no less!
Euphoric cheese
Hit: I like cheese and pizza and playing and shit
This is not a strong enough statement. Here's a tip: if you ever want to get on Gin's good side buy her cheese. There can be anything else around to eat but if there's good cheese Gin is all over it.
HDS the 'ler
This weekend saw me doing something I never did but for the barest of moments before. HDS transformed himself into a bit of a switch over the weekend. The first opportunity presented itself with our darling little subby Jo, or so my poor memory tells me. Myriads, as I recall, was giving her a workover on JPie's bed. I was helping him keep her controlled and something must have snapped 'cause I started helping. Of course, this didn't go over well with Jo but I didn't care. It was ever so delightful. Cassi was next to suffer when she made the mistake of coming to sit on the bed and was attacked by quite a few. Took me a while to join in but t'was great fun.
Poor Amanda didn't like aggressive HDS. I attack her and she does nothing but demand a return to passive and meek HDS. Terrible! Too bad for her I'd tasted the 'ler bug and wasn't going back. Unfortunately for Gin she was next. As those who've 'ler'd me know, I am a struggler of the highest order. Great fun it was to play with someone as strong and thrashy as myself. How are those pockets treating you, eh Gin dear?
So now HDS has some 'leritute. One more thing to come out of this crazy weekend.
Wrasslin'
HDS: Ended up bloody and bruised. (My Bad)
Watchin' HDS survive a pro wrestler pretzellin' him in demonstrations... damn, kid, you rock. I'll stand ya a round of whatever at NEST, just 'cause you survived. Two o' them moves looked rather twisty painful.
MrLegacy, yer good company. Thanks for not killin' that mod while Gumbyin' his flexible self.
The story behind this fracas has to do, of course, with our darling Mistress Aura and Mr. Legacy (Bill), her wrasslin' hubby. Bill happens to be a professional wrestler and somehow a matchup with this one was desired and set up. Maybe because of the famous HDS versus MTP Jeff match of NHLee. For whatever reason, it was planned and executed in Cassi's room on Sunday eve. I was taught a few submission holds, most of which I knew I'd not be able to pull off on a pro, and we assumed the position and had at it. Apparently I lasted longer than I felt, for I was told it was minutes after the fact. Of course, all I could do was avoid actually getting pinned; trying to pin was out of the question. In the end I had to tap out due to total lack of energy reserves. If we do this again we'll have to do it before the vicious and cruel girls drain my energy.
There would have been more matches (and eventual punishment for me, as I would have lost 'em all.
) but I hurt my neck a bit during the first one. Took a roll with Bill on top of my head as I tried to move and it moved a way it didn't like. So, eschewing matches, I got to do what I do best and became a live demonstration dummy for some fancy submission holds. And onlookers? if they looked painful it's cause they were.
I would have been merely bruised if not for my being cheeky during one hold and inspiring an automatic reaction from Bill which got my elbow bleeding. So yeah, more wounds for HDS.
The Monkey is FINE!
"The monkey is FINE!!" -13 LMAO ILY!! IFD!!! P.S. Thanks for making our bed LOL
Yeah, this. Gin and I utilized Skip and Mike's bedroom for a bit of play on Sunday evening and, of course, I destroyed it in my usual manner. Yeah, big surprise. Well, as we were remaking it I went to put the large stuffed monkey that had been sitting on it back when I was finished perfecting it. I kept trying to make him sit in the perfect position and Gin finally got exasperated and yelled "The monkey is FINE!" and made me leave it be. So yeah.
Things I missed
Bah that I wasn't around to see the epic JoWNED extravaganza. I only heard tales of its magnificence after the fact. A repeat must be done! I need to witness the Lean Machine in action.
And, apparently, Cindy made MTP Jeff actually fly into the air at one point, high enough for it to have been possible for her to roll away underneath him. Jeff denies it but we all know his record of truth-telling when it comes to such things.
A few responses
Nah, I've known a lot of bastards and even more rat-bastards. Jeff's more of a thug
Yeah, I'll second this.
Making orgasmic sounds whenever a car or truck would drive by and spray Aura's windshield with water.
Oh poop, I forgot to give them washer fluid. For those wondering, apparently the Auramobile had no windshield washer fluid and bad wipers. I had a bottle of fluid and could have replaced the blades but it never happened. Sorry, Aura, Bill and Cindy. HDS has auto-repair fail.
I haz pictures I needs emailz! Only Those that attended.
Yus, HDS can haz pictures? He send PM mebbe wif email yus?
People
In absolutely no order here are some shout-outs I need to make. If I left you off beat me up! I tried to remember all but I know I neglected many; my ability to remember names is terrible. Unlike everyone else I had no idea who was coming so everyone was a surprise to me.
Milagros
It was grand to meet you, my good man. We've posted together for years and never saw one glimpse of each other until now. I'm glad that is rectified at long last.
Myriads
A pleasure to talk to you again, Bossman. I enjoy our conversations immensely, even if I doubt my ability to act on a tenth of the good advice you so freely give. Helping you give Jo some pwnage on Saturday was an honor and a privilege. My thanks to your for your efforts to organize this amazing weekend.
Impaler
Comrade in arms! We shalln't let those girls simply steamroll over us! There is no Imfailer, only Imwinner, no matter what they may think. Onward to victory! Excellent it was to see you, compadre.
Deviant Dave and Penny Lane
To the little girls - It amuses the hell out of an old guy to see you comin' into your own in this. Brings back great memories of youth. Now quit thrashin' Impaler, HDS, and the other boys so much. Share some love, kids. No, not with me. THEM. Thanks for the hugs, and for treatin' my lady so well.
Hey, I'll take a thrashin' or love. Both are delightful.
I'm so glad you both came; meeting you two was an amazing thing. Unlike K-Dawg and his white body-double you, Deviant One, were instantly recognizable. Now I've got a voice and a face to go behind the Listfather and another buddy to trash Vista with. Next time I need a break I know whom to conscript, eh? To the lovely Penny Lane, I'm sad I didn't talk to or see much of you, so much movement around I was doing. Next time I see you both I'll rectify and have a longer chat (while not pretzel'd up, even). I'm so sorry for the immense pain your travel here became; we'll all take up a collection and charter you a jet next year mebbe?
Cassi
CASSI! So sad leaving you on Sunday evening it was. It was delightful to see you so happy in that straightjacket. I'll be your Dr. Pepper holder anytime you need me, ya hear? And you can have a piece of me anytime you want if it will bring that giddily happy face back. We'll sit and watch more Ghost Hunters next time, eh?
Jo
I'm so proud you made it out of that hogtie in such a rapid manner! I'm glad I could provide what little encouragement I could to that. Thank you for being my 'lering beta tester, even if it was totally unwillingly. Need to see moar of you next time; hopefully no more tests and lab sessions to interrupt things. I'm glad we got your images back; losing data is no fun thing. JoJo! <3
Euphoricy
Ginny! I am so glad I met you this weekend. T'was amazing how quickly we connected, despite totally not knowing each other before. Thank you so much for playing with me both days, and for such long periods. I greatly enjoyed you as 'ler and thank you for being 'lee too. It's awesome to have met another person who puts up a staggeringly tough fight. Come back to Albany nao; HDS need to give moar tummeh rubbins.
Mondy
Mondy! You light up my day so hard, whether you're plotting impossible plots or screaming out "Team JoManda divided cannot stand" as Jo turns the tables on you. Whether you like it or not HDS has acquired some 'leritude, so now I bite back.
You'll learn to love it just as I love when you shed your usual subby self and go on the offensive with me. I wish we'd been able to talk more; again, curse my lack of presence! Next time we make moar time. <3s to you.
JPie
Sorry we destroyed your bed ... again ... and again ... and again. Seriously, this poor girl is trying to sleep and we're STILL in her bed. Ridiculous! Even had her changing in the closet when we were in her bedroom. Seriously, how bad are we?
Sorry for all the bother, and thank you so much for being so generous with your bed of doooooooom.
Skipalicious & Mike
HDS - Holy-freaking-adorable. Srsly, it was so awesome meeting you We didn't really get to talk that much, but you seem super sweet, and we totally need to keep in touch xoxox
Skippy! Thank you and Mike so much for the use of the bedroom on Sunday. And yes indeed, we didn't talk nearly enough, for stupid me was off at school or sleeping or something inane. This will be rectified in the future. It will! Amazing meeting you both.
Jeffman
Always a pleasure to trade barbs with you, Jeffman.
Loved having the mod chats with yourself and Myriads (sorry JPie; on your bed again), even if we didn't get to do all of what I figured we would those two days. It sounds like you had a grand time with Cassi and mummification. Be seein' you, I do hope.
Danimal & Ayla ny
Danimal! It stunk you had to leave so soon that night. Next time leave the buggers out in the cold. I hope you at least mauled 'em a bit. Even a tiny bit? You and Lee made for an awesome duet; I could sit and listen to you two all day. And Tracy! I'm sorry we didn't meet up for another rematch; I missed mah champion HDS wrestler (and now Wicked Witch of the West). We'll have to rectify that next time I see you, m'kay?
Lee
Never a bad day when I get to see Lee. Fortunately I did avoid those evil mudslides, for I suspect I'd be in quite a different state today had I found them. Probably still be inebriated. I didn't see nearly as much of you as I'd have liked, which leads me to fear the evil will be more concentrated when I next see you. Could be bad news. As I said to Danimal, you and he made for an amazing duet. HDS need encore!
K-Dawg
Setting aside my shock, it was fantastic meeting you. I didn't think I'd be using that lotion but boy did it help when I did as I tend to do and scraped myself up significantly. I am depressed I missed this amazing Lean On and thank you for at least sharing the tale on the radio. I'm so glad you made it even if I didn't have the special surprise at your presence, being that I knew nothing about who was coming.
Ray & Tracy
Thank you so much to both of you for the work you did in organizing this escapade. I had an amazing weekend and it's all thanks to the both of you. Next year I demand, if able, to do more to help with transportation. Living so close it's a travesty that I didn't. Seeing you two again was a treat, as it always seems to be. Rayman, you remain the dirty old man we know and love. Never change, 'cause I need my laughs.
Glamorous
Cindy! Another person I essentially did not know and came to know quite well. I'm depressed I missed every instance of your pwnage; I might have joined in.
Yours and Bill's interactions were hysterical; I couldn't be in the same room and keep a straight face. Take care, Cindy, and next time Mistress Aura sticks a banana you no where you do it right back and tell her it was my idea.
Mistress Aura
Cheri! Well, I was not raped, so I guess you held back.
It was fantastic meeting you and your motley crew that weekend, even if I did end up causing you troubles. But, then, that's what I seem to do best.
My apologies for never getting to your car troubles; it should have been done! HDS failed. ;_; You speak of evil I'm due next time, though, and I can't seem to build up any fear. I shall continue to be snarky until next we meet and beyond! I hope the wrestling match was what you wanted. <3, eh?
Bill
You, sir, are one of a kind. No worries about causing me any hurt; as Lee will attest I am very good at injuring myself without anyone else's intervention. T'was an honor and privilege to wrestle with you and serve as demonstration dummy. I hope I gave a good birthday present in that; hard to tell on my end, flying all around near the floor.
Delighted to have met you and I do hope to see you again. Maybe rematch, although the outcome is assured and it ain't me getting the win.
Slacker
Slackah. Thanks for being my doorman on Sunday; poor guy lets me in once and then gets sent down again to let me in when I returned later that day. Congratulations on your Steelers winning; I've never before cared about a Super Bowl but I know I'll remember this one. I have to admit that I, like Jeff, didn't realize who you were at first. In my defense, unlike that boob Jeff, I hadn't heard you speak yet. Once I heard that voice I knew who it was. Awesome to meet you, sah.
Bella
Bella! BellaBellaBellaBella! Thank you for so many things this weekend (although your evil ways with my feet maybe less.
). I always love talking with you and I'm glad I was able to so much, even if it wasn't always total flowers and sunshine conversation. Love you, Bella dearest. <3
Johti
I hope to Jeebus I spelled that correctly. You are amazing and made me more cheerful just being near you. Now stop trying to wake up the hallway by tickling me at midnight outside sleeping people's doors! Simply awful.
T'was grand to meet you, my lady, and I hope I can meet you again soon! You and Gin tag team moar.
Classy
Classy! I barely saw you and it makes me a sad HDS. I heard they worked you over during the commercials; terrible of me to miss that delightful affair. Next time we talk moar m'kay?
The Good Captain Mad
A pleasure to see the good captain, man with far cooler goatee than this poor slob. Delighted to hold the Ginster for ya; we'll have to try that again when interruptions aren't as likely so you can get the full experience.
I salute you, sah!
Bald Dave & Su'rah/Sarah/heck if I know
I don't even know if the lovely lady's name is spelled right; so much insanity goin' on in here muddles the lot of it.
Splendid to see Dave and meet Su'rah, even if I felt like I saw nothing of either of you. One half of HisBaldEmperorsRhino represent! Next time we represent' more, eh? Glad I could help hold you down for the ladies a little while, at least.
Whew, that was too many hours of postwork. I know I forgot things and people and HDS sorry! All I can say is that was a weekend to remember if ever there was one. Unless I'm dead and buried I will be there next year and, you know what, if I am dead and buried I am rising from the grave and coming next year. HDS is OUT. *Collapses*
