Tickle cheating

Question to all:

Does having a tickling fetish make it inappropriate to tickle your friends? Are there new boundaries? And does tickling become a form of cheating if you tickle someone else while in a relationship???

Personally I would never tickle or be tickled by my friends, because it is sexual to me and I don't want any sexual interaction with my friends. It would be the same if they grabbed my boobs.

If it is cheating - I guess this decision is up to your partner. If your partner feels cheated on if you tickle your friends or your friends tickle you and it's arousing to you, he/she has every right to think that and draw the consequences.

Theres two elements to this,

First It depends whats going on in your head, when you tickle a friend do you feel like your just goofing around or are you getting some sort of sexual gratification from it?

If you are unable to partake in any sort of tickling without being turned on then you need to ask yourself if your ok with that.

Secondly how does your partner see it? and how much do you value their view?


For me, tickling in a non sexual situation is just my favoirite game, in a relationship I would have no issue having various tickle fights with friends, but if I was with a partner who couldnt seporate these in her head then for her sake I wouldnt.

It really depends on the relationship and what it is based on.

If you have always enjoyed tickling, I don't see anything wrong with tickling your friends as long as its ok with them and things don't get too carried away. Now as fare as "tickle cheating" is concerned I think that if you have a mate that's into tickling and you decide to tickle someone else with their knowledge then yes that could be percieved as a form of cheating. Especially if tickling is regarded as an intimate act between you two. Sounds odd but I'm sure things can get pretty touchy (no pun intended) in the realm of tickling. Just put yourself in thieir place and how you would feel in that situation.

think that if you have a mate that's into tickling and you decide to tickle someone else with their knowledge then yes that could be percieved as a form of cheating.

Click to expand...

Not if you do it without their knowledge? 🙂

To me it's cheating. My biggest sexual wantwill not be turned into fun time by my partner and her friends.

Leo tickles said:

To me it's cheating. My biggest sexual wantwill not be turned into fun time by my partner and her friends.

Click to expand...

You would consider it cheating even if your partner was not sexually turned on by it?

Probably not if my partner wasn't turned on by it. But the way I work is that nobody touches my partner but me, aside from friendly hugs, handshakes, etc.

Most people have the same view on this as I do, but I always try to make it clear what's okay and what isn't.

I tickle all my friends all the time, they know what's up and don't have an issue with it.

Like what others have mentioned, it really does depend on the points of view and frames of mind of the ler, the lee, and any third party. (ie. ler's and/or lee's significant other, etc.) In my situation, I'm really fortunate to have a fiancee who knows about my fetish and knows that when I partake in this fetish it is for fun. Nevertheless, if my fiancee were to have a change of heart and became very uncomfortable with the fetish then I would respect her wishes.

My friends are no different. I have several friends (here and local) that are quite ticklish and on occasion I have exploited that in good faith to which that good faith has been respected and reciprocated. The tickling I do doesn't go beyond a series of pokes or a quick "debilitating tickle" (making them hunch over or flinch briefly) but I always do so in good faith and if they don't want it, they've always asked me not to and I will always respect their wishes. It is also the same if their significant others came to me and asked me not to; it's all about respect.

I think the answer to all of your questions ticklechambers is that it depends on the level of respect you have, both self and others but particularly the latter. A person without respect, I believe, would be more likely to break boundaries and violate the wishes of everyone involved.

I don't think the fetish gets in the way of tickling friends or it considered to be cheating - it's your actions and level of respect that determine those factors. The fetish is like a gun; on it's complete own it is harmless and it only becomes harmful after someone places bullets in the magazine, loads the magazine, turns the safety off, loads the chamber, aims and then fires. Actions and respect determine the boundaries and appropriateness, not the fetish. IMO

It depends on how far you take it. If you tickle them to turn you on then i would say its cheating.

ticklechambers,

If you're in a committed relationship, then it depends entirely on your agreement with your partner. Make sure you have an agreement that you both like and understand clearly.

This has been a debate for a while. I would feel insecure if my husband tickled another woman (even though my husband does not get aroused by tickling). I think because tickling has a sexual connection for me that I shouldn't tickle any other guys. I wouldn't do anything with someone else that would make me uncomfortable if the roles were reversed.

Tickling someone else when you're already in a relationship, that's easily debatable...

But the "tickling your friends" part is a NEW debate:

My answer is...who knows! I'm assuming everyone's single in the group.....you have a bunch of friends, you get in tickle fights with the cute ones..... wrong or right?

I mean, what if you all go out to dinner, and you have a pantyhose fetish, and one or two of your cute friends is wearing really nice stockings, and decides to take her shoes off - you're going to get turned on...is that wrong or right?
Or for the other guys, they have low cut dresses, and their boobs are easily visible....

Let me change the sexes, since I'll step back so the women can fight over the moral high horse/soap box!:

I have a friend/co-worker who is a guy, who is very handsome and muscular/cut. He's obviously VERY popular with the female workers/bosses.

A few take any opportunity to make physical contact with him - poke him, give him hugs, back rubs...he happily enjoys them!
(Before everyone starts crapping on themselves about "sexual harassment," that's mostly toward guys being attracted to ladies, and luckily I work where no one gives a shit about that.)

I mean, wrong or right?
(He's not complaining, nor or the other guys.....or girls, obviously!
on my end, he's a great guy, hard worker, and everyone's friends with him...we're enjoying what little freedom we have until we're all living in that "1984" world that's coming sooner than later......)

Good answer mabus!

I was just curious to see what other people thought. I haven't even posed the question to my boyfriend yet. But i guess in the end, i get turned on if i get tickled. And it would feel like cheating to me.

I just wondered if everyone else felt the same way 😛

Fortunately, my wife doesn't see tickling another woman's feet as infidelity because she doesn't see tickling feet as a sexual act. She sees it as a childish interest that I never outgrew. This is a long story, but I'll tell the pertinent part. We met some friends at a rock 'n' roll bar one night. One of the girls got up from the table with her date and sat at the bar which was a few feet away. She took off her heels and started and swinging her bare feet back and forth. Of course I had to watch. She started wiggling her toes at me and smiling. I got up to get a drink and she asked me why I was staring at her feet. I immediatley told her that I have a foot fetish. Her boyfriend said that he did too and started sucking on her toes at the bar (we were all liquored up and high). Being stoned, drunk, and bold, I took her other foot and started tickling it. I tickled her bare foot for at least 5 minutes while she laughed and curled her toes, etc. So, here is the bizarre scene...a beautiful blonde sitting at a bar with the toes of one foot being sucked by one guy and her other foot being tickled by another guy. My wife watched all of this as though it was no big thing. She couldn't have cared less.

mean, what if you all go out to dinner, and you have a pantyhose fetish, and one or two of your cute friends is wearing really nice stockings, and decides to take her shoes off - you're going to get turned on...is that wrong or right?
Or for the other guys, they have low cut dresses, and their boobs are easily visible....

Click to expand...

In my opinion, that is a different situation! If others do something that turns you on, involuntarily, you can't control that.

If you yourself initial a tickle fight to get your jollies off, it's your fault. Totally different situation! 🙂

A few take any opportunity to make physical contact with him - poke him, give him hugs, back rubs...he happily enjoys them!
(Before everyone starts crapping on themselves about "sexual harassment," that's mostly toward guys being attracted to ladies, and luckily I work where no one gives a shit about that.)

I mean, wrong or right?
(He's not complaining, nor or the other guys.....or girls, obviously!

Click to expand...

Let's say a really ugly, old, persistant woman does the same shit. Would he still not complain? I also don't really see what this example has to do with the topic, care to elaborate? 🙂

Yeah, I knew I'd set her off......

Always making sure not to disappoint people!

When the tickling causes sexual arousal, and that person is not your mate, then that could be called cheating unless your mate was present and condoned the activity.

I have no intention to ever stop playing with friends regardless of my relationship status. I'll always want to have the freedom to be tickled or spanked or have my hair pulled by whoever I want, and whoever I was in a relationship with would have the same freedoms.

I don't have anything against people who have different points of view in their own relationships, but I will absolutely never be in a relationship where the dude expects my behavior to change.

So no...I don't think tickling is cheating.

Just don't lie. Then you will know how your partner feels and can go from there. I don't think it's cheating but I REALLY don't think it's okay to lie about it.

rhiannon said:

Personally I would never tickle or be tickled by my friends, because it is sexual to me and I don't want any sexual interaction with my friends. It would be the same if they grabbed my boobs.

If it is cheating - I guess this decision is up to your partner. If your partner feels cheated on if you tickle your friends or your friends tickle you and it's arousing to you, he/she has every right to think that and draw the consequences.

Click to expand...

I like those thoughts and in that case I'd agree.

...but my mind is arguing in a circle with myself concerning if it would not be sexual.

Tickling to me isn't purely sexual. In fact.... it is only sexual when I have a sexual connection with the person, and the only person that I have a sexual connection with is the hubby.

With that in mind, Alex and I have had conversations and we are cool with tickling others. (Or else our gathering in April would be sort of an issue) We do have boundaries when it comes to spots to tickle. We are usually around if one of us is going to be involved in a prolonged session.

We tickle friends, but it purely fun and not at all sexual. I don't tickle my family at all, but only because I don't want my intentions to come into question for any reason. Most of my family knows that my husband and I are into tickling. And, no, I don't get anything out of it with them... never did.

As tickling exists for many reasons- flirting, four-play, fun, etc..... You have to set your boundaries and have open communication with the person that you are in a relationship with. My personal viewpoint, I don't think it is cheating. But I do think that if Alex felt the need to sneak behind my back to do it, I'd be pissed. (lack of communication, lying, and whatnot... 🙂)

_________________________________________________________________
@ Mabus- As much as I want to say that I do not agree:
One of the guys at my job (a custodian, but that isn't the point) hit on me and asked me out to dinner. I told him I was married, and he asked me out again and hit on me 2 more times.

I was pretty disgusted, but I told my husband jokingly, "Man, it would be different if he was good looking! I'd have someone I could flirt with at work!"

Yes... I did (lol). And then he (husband) and I had a real conversation about how unfair that was, but it was true. If the guy didn't look like a ogre, regardless of his occupation, I probably would have been flattered. (I'm not saying all women would be!) But although I was not flirting with the guy or doing anything to get his attention, there are guys at work that I do occasionally flirt with. Verbal teasing- is all, but we do it, and it is kinda fun.

I wouldn't go as far as to say that "sexual harassment" is for the men at work. 🙂
_________________________________________________________________

Before I was married, when I was single and looking- yeah I intiated tickle fights to get my jollies! And it is NOT WRONG! I think it is totally fair when you are flirting, and it is fun! I don't think I should have had to wear a t-shirt in college saying, "WARNING!!!! Boys... if you tickle me, I'll get wet!" just to even the sexual playing field and to make sure that I wasn't taking advantage of the fact that I was totally into that 1 minute rib-tickling that sexy Bobby just gave me. (Hi Bobby! )

Really, I honestly think people over analyze the fetish. Keep doing that! Meanwhile, I'm gonna have fun!

ok chambers this is simple.... and everyone is right..... its all about do u feel its cheating. the lord say that if you lust after a women in your heart then you have pretty much committed adultery with her. if you think tickling another girl while your with someone in a relationship will damage your ability to stay committed with that girl you might as well just not tickle anyone. on the flip side if you can tickle someone and feel like that wont damage your integrity to your partner then go for it. its as simple as if u dont have a problem dont cause a problem and if it isnt a problem then go for it....


on the quick debate of sexual harassment let me explain exactly what it is... first of all, sex crimes and work place acts are reserved to the state to define by statues. Sexual harassment is and has always been defined as, unwanted sexual contact or comments made by someone to another person or party. so if i go up to a girl and say "your so fucking hott that i would totally grudge fuck the ever living shit out of u until you creamed yourself 1000 times and licked it all off ur pussy with my tongue." you could not get me or anyone for sexual harassment until you tell them you dont want and contact or comments of that sexual nature at anytime ever regardless of any situation. have someone witness it or record it. if it happens again then its sexual harassment. and sexual harassment pertains to anyone regardless of gender. it can be man on women, women on man, man on man or woman or woman. but your first have to tell them to stop and be able to prove you did like by a witness or record yourself saying it and then getting them caught in the act again like via text message or having someone here them saying it.