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This is war!

T

TklDuo-Ann

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OK time to get proactive here. I've been bitching about all the nastiness going on here lately and how it isn't being effectively dealt with. (The mods can only do so much) So, rather than just bitch, I'm inviting others to join me in doing something positive. Here's my plan...

For every nasty post we see, I challenge you (and myself) to turn around and post something nice about someone....even the person being nasty. Rather than responding in kind to the nastiness, let's overwhelm it with positives. Let's not let it push us away.

So, what do you think? Care to join me?

Ann
 
Ann, great idea! I'm game! I just hope we can get others to join on the bandwagon. Maybe by doing what you suggested, we can get rid of some of the negativity, or at least temper it.

Mitch
 
Awww! See? Even Ray is getting the warm fuzzies again! It's working already! 😉

Ann
 
You KNOW I am full of warm fuzzies....yep that is me....Full of it..... 😉
 
Well, you're full of SOMETHING! lol :twohugs:

Isn't it nice when we decide to NOT fight? We really don't do ourselves, or anyone else any good anyway. We all want what we want when we want it. I think this is one of many times for a reality check. Rather than pissing and moaning (as I've done myself of late...sorry!), we can relax and do some good....and support those who work so hard with so little thanks.

Ann
 
Sounds like a plan...I was about to take a long hiatus from the forum in order to avoid the negativity, but there are too many good folks here to just "walk away" as a good friend put it......so...I will rethink that....support the good and ignore those that try to spoil it for others.......


Good thread Annie..... :cat:
 
Yep! I'm too damned stubborn to let others spoil my good times! I'll be gone for the weekend. Hopefully others will jump on board and I'll have all sorts of GOOD stuff to come back to.

Ann
 
i am glad you aren't going to leave, ray.. i would miss you very much.. as for myself, i do try to only say positive and encouraging things in my posts. and i would like to take this opportunity to apologize to you Ann for that stupid remark about being able to purchase the feather pendant.
 
isabeau said:
and i would like to take this opportunity to apologize to you Ann for that stupid remark about being able to purchase the feather pendant.
Click to expand...

No apology is necessary. You were simply following the flow of the thread. If my frustration in that getting so far off track seemed aimed at you, it wasn't. I was just trying to get things back on track and then decided to give in and let it follow the flow it had developed, which is why I asked Dan to move it for me. No worries.

Ann
 
venray said:
Sounds like a plan...I was about to take a long hiatus from the forum in order to avoid the negativity, but there are too many good folks here to just "walk away" as a good friend put it......so...I will rethink that....support the good and ignore those that try to spoil it for others.......


Good thread Annie..... :cat:
Click to expand...

Oh, like I would have let you stay away too long. Don't make me drive that far north and duct tape you in front of that computer.

I like the idea Ann and wish you all the best on it. Anything that makes me obsolete is welcomed!

Q
 
OK, OK, I'll try to be good.....

but as they say, without evil there can be no good, so it must be good to be evil sometime 😛
 
qjakal said:
I like the idea Ann and wish you all the best on it. Anything that makes me obsolete is welcomed!
Click to expand...

YOU? Obsolete? Perish the thought! You'll never be obsolete. I think you (and the entire mod squad) do a great job. Life is just too full of LIFE to spend every waking moment here keeping things in control. And, ya know what? You shouldn't have to. So, if we can't bounce the junk out, we'll simply try to drown it out with the good stuff. Frankly, I just got sick of listening to myself bitch and moan and decided to actually try to DO something about it. Fancy that! 😎

OH, and as for your duct tape comment, I'm sure we can find other uses for that! :bunny:

Ann
 
I've contributed more than my fair share to the nastiness, so I think I'll give this bit a try. :dogpile:
 
Welcome! 'Tis time to take back the community! Let people say and think what they like....as long as they do so with respect. :xpulcy:

A few suggestions to help us along...

When we see something that we find offensive, we have three main options...

1. We can respond in kind with more nastiness, which just makes matters worse. It does nothing to solve the issue and only acts to perpetuate the negativity.
2. We can report the post IF it breaks the rules or comes close enough that we aren't sure. Remember, the mods aren't here to babysit and make everything go our way.
3. We can simply let it pass and walk away from it. This is likely to be the best option the most often.

There are a TON of people here. We are never all going to agree on everything. Nor are we going to like everyone. There are people here who I love deeply and others who I find difficult to be around. It's the same as any other community. It's only normal and to be expected. We shouldn't try to make it into our own little view of what things should be. I know. I've tried. It doesn't work...fortunately, since my view can be pretty narrow at times. As with any other large group, we simply need to take what we find useful and leave the rest.

We also need to recognize that the mods, as effective as they can be, can't do everything. Nor should they be expected to. They have lives too. This is OUR community. It's going to be what WE make of it. If we join the negativity, it will be negative and not much fun. If we blow off the negativity and respond with positives, it will be much more enjoyable.

And, as with everything else we read on here, you can take or leave this as you wish. It's just an invitation. 😉

Ann
 
ViperGTS said:
I've contributed more than my fair share to the nastiness, so I think I'll give this bit a try. :dogpile:
Click to expand...

We all do at times, Mark. Having been as sick as you've been can't help matters any. None of us is perfect. The thing to do is check ourselves and try again, as I'm trying to do myself with this thread after my own nastiness. Good to have you on board. :bubble:

Ann
 
Well-said, Ann! And thank you.

TklDuo-Ann said:
Welcome! 'Tis time to take back the community! Let people say and think what they like....as long as they do so with respect. :xpulcy:

A few suggestions to help us along...

When we see something that we find offensive, we have three main options...

1. We can respond in kind with more nastiness, which just makes matters worse. It does nothing to solve the issue and only acts to perpetuate the negativity.
2. We can report the post IF it breaks the rules or comes close enough that we aren't sure. Remember, the mods aren't here to babysit and make everything go our way.
3. We can simply let it pass and walk away from it. This is likely to be the best option the most often.

There are a TON of people here. We are never all going to agree on everything. Nor are we going to like everyone. There are people here who I love deeply and others who I find difficult to be around. It's the same as any other community. It's only normal and to be expected. We shouldn't try to make it into our own little view of what things should be. I know. I've tried. It doesn't work...fortunately, since my view can be pretty narrow at times. As with any other large group, we simply need to take what we find useful and leave the rest.

We also need to recognize that the mods, as effective as they can be, can't do everything. Nor should they be expected to. They have lives too. This is OUR community. It's going to be what WE make of it. If we join the negativity, it will be negative and not much fun. If we blow off the negativity and respond with positives, it will be much more enjoyable.

And, as with everything else we read on here, you can take or leave this as you wish. It's just an invitation. 😉

Ann
Click to expand...
 
TklDuo-Ann said:
We all do at times, Mark. Having been as sick as you've been can't help matters any. None of us is perfect. The thing to do is check ourselves and try again, as I'm trying to do myself with this thread after my own nastiness. Good to have you on board. :bubble:

Ann
Click to expand...

I have a problem checking myself, that's my issue. It just took a good kick in the ass for me to figure it out. 😉 It was more than just me being so sick the past month.

Thanks!
 
**sigh** It's so hard to be nicewhen someone's being a jerk. I can't help myself. But ok, for YOU, Ann, I'll try. No promises though.
 
slacker2114 said:
**sigh** It's so hard to be nicewhen someone's being a jerk. I can't help myself. But ok, for YOU, Ann, I'll try. No promises though.
Click to expand...

now slacker.. don't try to fool us.. you are a big teddy bear..i've never seen a negative post from you ever. :couch:
 
Well for me, I know I can get a bit sarcastic at times, but I tend to keep it in the P&R with rest of the jerks like me :veryhappy

But I follow the rule I was taught as a kid...
If you have nothing nice to say....say nothing at all.

I can seperate someone's attitudes from their personality, which is what I think 90% of the problems are. Some people cant. I try to look at an individual as a whole, not in pieces or make a judgement on someone from 1 single post or 1 single personality trait.
After all we all can be jerks every once and while (some more often than others) and I just accept it as life. Because usually when a person's a jerk one day (or for a week) they usually come back into the fold after a good post (like this one) or they get a damn good rodgering or tickling.

Like Al Green sang "Lets..........Lets stay togeather. In times that are good and bad, happy or sad."

Rob
 
MTP Jeff said:
Well-said, Ann! And thank you.
Click to expand...

Thank YOU, Jeff! I'm only sorry that I have let it go this long without saying something...positive that is. I remember what it was like being a mod. And, I know that we (mods) dumped on you as well. It can be a thankless job. But, know that we DO understand and appreciate things...even when we don't always agree.

ViperGTS said:
I have a problem checking myself, that's my issue.
Click to expand...

NO! Really!?!?! I hadn't noticed. LOL I can understand that. I've done the same...all too often. Shall we agree to check one another on things when we're in pissy moods? Ray and I do that a lot. It allows us to blow off steam as needed without doing so on the board and getting everyone all worked up. None of us is perfect. We all need a good kick in the pants on occassion. Isn't it nice to have family around who knows how to do so without condemning us at the same time?

slacker2114 said:
**sigh** It's so hard to be nicewhen someone's being a jerk. I can't help myself. But ok, for YOU, Ann, I'll try. No promises though.
Click to expand...

Tell me about it! LOL I think we can ALL learn a lot from one another...IF we allow ourselves to do so. As for not promising, that's cool. I won't promise to not beat you sense....oops! I promise to remind you when you go off track. How's that? 😉

isabeau said:
now slacker.. don't try to fool us.. you are a big teddy bear..i've never seen a negative post from you ever.
Click to expand...

Boy, does he have you snowed! lol j/k :blaugh:

Ann
 
robace252 said:
I can seperate someone's attitudes from their personality, which is what I think 90% of the problems are. Some people cant. I try to look at an individual as a whole, not in pieces or make a judgement on someone from 1 single post or 1 single personality trait.
After all we all can be jerks every once and while (some more often than others) and I just accept it as life. Because usually when a person's a jerk one day (or for a week) they usually come back into the fold after a good post (like this one) or they get a damn good rodgering or tickling.
Click to expand...

Almost missed ya, Rob! I totally agree. This is why I prefer getting to actually know folks through posting in GD rather than just the TK related goodies. The TK stuff is all fine and dandy. But, there's more to us than just that part. Getting to know the entire person...or whatever parts they're comfy sharing...is a big step in coming to accept the dynamics of what goes into their posting.

One thing I've noticed. Perhaps others have as well. If I KNOW someone is going through a rough time, or even just that their personality tends to be course though they mean well, I tend to accept the occassional outbursts more easily. If I don't know them and see the same kind of post, I tend to jump to thinking they're a jerk. Is that their fault? Nope. It's mine. They may have posted something I didn't like. But, I don't know where they're at. They may just be blowing off steam as well. I'm sure there are folks here who think I'm a jerk at times. And ya know what? They're right. I think the biggest battle is in reminding ourselves of these things and growing to confront one another in a friendly manner when we step out of line. That's all part of being friends at times.

OK, time to take my leave. See ya all on Sunday. Have a great...and peaceful...weekend!

Ann
 
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