9 Things I Hate About People (funny)

[steph]

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I
know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my
crotch when I ask where the toilet is?


2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire
room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change
the channel manually.


3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it
too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?


4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course
it
is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do
people
do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!


5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No
Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.


6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give
me a choice there, did ya sunshine?


7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new,
then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement,
then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.


8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the
longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?


9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus
come
yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

 

[milagros317]

LMAO
Very funny, Steph, especially numbers 4 and 9.

 

[giantfan121262]

LOL. So funny, yet so true!

 

[His Divine Shadow]

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire
room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change
the channel manually.

In their defense, some boxes, like my DirecTV Tivo thingy for one, are nearly impossible to use without a remote.

 

[Nige]

Very funny, and also very true
You should do stand up!!

 

[blondie46]

Those are funny, Steph! Another one that REALLY bugs me is when people say, "I don't want to make you mad, but...." Oh that drives me up the wall. They shouldn't mention it at all if they think it will make me mad.

Another one is with gossip. "I really like her, but...." then proceed to rip apart her/his character. I have found if someone gossips about someone else, they're surely talking about me too. Then again, "if no one ever talks about you, you must be boring."

 

[steph]

 

[Newcastle Uni]

Very funny, and also very true
You should do stand up!!

Do you write these things yourself Steph? Or is this cut and pasted from some website. We all do it though. People often acuse me of stealing their jokes and to them i say you can kiss my black arse.

(i'm white)

 

[steph]

It is not "cut and paste." They are sent to me by friends and if I think they're good enough, I share them with my friends here...

XOXO

 

[Newcastle Uni]

I just wanted an excuse to use that rubbish joke. Re-reading it, i can see that my post sounds offensive

 

[steph]

Yes it did. But as you can probably see, I chose not to let it aggravate.
Thank you tho~to recognize that took guts.
XOXO

Re-reading it, i can see that my post sounds offensive

 

[AffectionateDan]

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the
longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

A visit to the DMV comes close...