I woke up this morning, as I usually do to that damn rooster again. I really wish someone would shut him up. All I hear is cock-a-doodle-doo for 15 to 20 minutes while I try to get a little more sleep. Sheesh no wonder I look the way I do. Try hearing that everyday from close range. Anyway it seemed colder again today and those people that feed me and keep me in a pen with something called "chicken wire" are like going crazy over me. Ive never had so much attention. I mean yeah theyre good people, they feed me and pretty much let me do what I want but still Im a Turkey, and I dont like being held in by something called "chicken wire". Speaking of chickens they keep whispering around me today..what about I dont know and frankly I dont care. These idiots spend their life laying eggs which could be more chicks but instead they work hard to produce eggs for these "people" and I dont know why. All they do is cluck cluck cluck all the day long and that after a while gets very annoying.
Ahhh, how I wish to be free of the infernal clucking and cock-a-doodle-doo's.
Run free with the other Turkey's, much like this "Wild Turkey" I heard about that the farmers wife keeps in the house! I wish I could be that turkey. I heard the one of the people that says he is a farmhand tell another person that the farmer's wife LOVES that Wild Turkey and enjoys five a night! You think with all those Wild Turkey's she loves that I might have seen one. But no, they keep me l;ocked up in here with all this noise, these other animals and some little dog I have to scare off now and then. He just struts in here and starts barking so I have to get up raise my wings..which have gotten much fatter than before but I digress. It must be what they feed me, which is very tasty and I get as much as I want. So everything here isnt that bad.
Wait, did you hear that? There a commotion going on over there, something about whos gonna pluck.......................Naw. They must be kidding.
Hey wait a second, you dont think..........couldn't be.
Hey where did all the chickens go? Wheres that rooster?
HA HA, hey stupid farmer there isnt any trees in here, why are you bringing that axe? HA HA...............Ummmmmmmmmm.
Wait wait, hey now isnt this a little rash! I like it here in my pen. Where's the wild turkey? Oh no you dont have to do that, wait wait...come on I was just fooling with the dog. I ll let him play with me, seriously. I like the clucking. Oh come on put me down. NO NO NO!!!
COCK A DOODLE DOO, COCK A DOODLE DOO!
IM A FREAKING ROOSTER YOU IDIOT, CANT YOU HEAR ME!
COCK A DOODLE DOO, COCK A DOODLE.....................................
Well, here I am, in this pot. I cant see anything but that headache I had sure is gone. <sniff sniff> what is that wonderful aroma. OUCH! What the hell did that sicko farmer PUT UP MY ASS! Hey its getting hot in here, hey someone, anyone.......oh well...at least Im not one of those pigs...ha ha they ate him for easter. They will take me out soon. Anytime now. Anytime.
I hope you all enjoyed my little holiday present for all of you. Please get everyone you know to read this, you also have my permission to email it to any non-TMFers..but please try to give credit where its due. To the turkey.
And yes, I made this all up myself, it is an original work.
(This is one of my comdey routines I did last year)
And also starting tommrrow I will be re-doing some of the "Holiday Classics" songs and stories and will be inserting TMF members into the stories for a little bit of fun and a gift from me to all of you.
If you would like to be in a holiday story, tell me..I will warn you I will make fun of some people, but it will be out of love and friendship..not being spiteful.
If you do not wish for me to include you, tell me also or you can PM me.
Happy Holiday's.......
Your TMF Turkey,
Rob
Ahhh, how I wish to be free of the infernal clucking and cock-a-doodle-doo's.
Run free with the other Turkey's, much like this "Wild Turkey" I heard about that the farmers wife keeps in the house! I wish I could be that turkey. I heard the one of the people that says he is a farmhand tell another person that the farmer's wife LOVES that Wild Turkey and enjoys five a night! You think with all those Wild Turkey's she loves that I might have seen one. But no, they keep me l;ocked up in here with all this noise, these other animals and some little dog I have to scare off now and then. He just struts in here and starts barking so I have to get up raise my wings..which have gotten much fatter than before but I digress. It must be what they feed me, which is very tasty and I get as much as I want. So everything here isnt that bad.
Wait, did you hear that? There a commotion going on over there, something about whos gonna pluck.......................Naw. They must be kidding.
Hey wait a second, you dont think..........couldn't be.
Hey where did all the chickens go? Wheres that rooster?
HA HA, hey stupid farmer there isnt any trees in here, why are you bringing that axe? HA HA...............Ummmmmmmmmm.
Wait wait, hey now isnt this a little rash! I like it here in my pen. Where's the wild turkey? Oh no you dont have to do that, wait wait...come on I was just fooling with the dog. I ll let him play with me, seriously. I like the clucking. Oh come on put me down. NO NO NO!!!
COCK A DOODLE DOO, COCK A DOODLE DOO!
IM A FREAKING ROOSTER YOU IDIOT, CANT YOU HEAR ME!
COCK A DOODLE DOO, COCK A DOODLE.....................................
Well, here I am, in this pot. I cant see anything but that headache I had sure is gone. <sniff sniff> what is that wonderful aroma. OUCH! What the hell did that sicko farmer PUT UP MY ASS! Hey its getting hot in here, hey someone, anyone.......oh well...at least Im not one of those pigs...ha ha they ate him for easter. They will take me out soon. Anytime now. Anytime.
I hope you all enjoyed my little holiday present for all of you. Please get everyone you know to read this, you also have my permission to email it to any non-TMFers..but please try to give credit where its due. To the turkey.
And yes, I made this all up myself, it is an original work.
(This is one of my comdey routines I did last year)
And also starting tommrrow I will be re-doing some of the "Holiday Classics" songs and stories and will be inserting TMF members into the stories for a little bit of fun and a gift from me to all of you.
If you would like to be in a holiday story, tell me..I will warn you I will make fun of some people, but it will be out of love and friendship..not being spiteful.
If you do not wish for me to include you, tell me also or you can PM me.
Happy Holiday's.......
Your TMF Turkey,
Rob
Thanks for that present. 
