GoForTheLaugh
TMF Expert
- Joined
- May 6, 2005
- Messages
- 310
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This came up in an e-mail I wrote to someone on this board, and I thought I would share it. All feedback will be appreciated.
Even though I discovered the tickling community in 1999 when I came across Jack's Rack, it took me until recently to do something about my hidden fetish.
One reason: I have met people who practice BDSM, and I have been supportive of them even though BDSM does not appeal to me. None of them knows that I like tickling; to them, I am vanilla boy. I have never been able to say anything or so much as ask them a question about tickling (which would have spared me a lot of negative self-image) because they go on and on about how ridiculous the tickle fans are, how pain cannot be warm and controlled during tickling, and all this other stuff.
I no longer associate with them.
Now that I have admitted to myself that I have this non-vanilla interest, I realize that I am open to friendship with BDSM people who are open to accepting that I like what I like even if they do not like it. Otherwise, however, I am tired of being made to think that what they like is good while what I like is bad.
Even the book I have just read, When Somene You Love is Kinky, defends practices that make my skin crawl but only mentions tickling pejoratively (basically something to avoid/something to make sure you say you are against in negotiations--and this happenes about four or five times, too). Yet, its authors foster the lie of the open-minded kink community.
People on this board seem to think that the BDSM community is open-minded. I say: There must certainly be some cool, progressive people in it, but on the whole they are a bunch of hypocrites.
That rant felt good. I have been waiting for years to say it!
Even though I discovered the tickling community in 1999 when I came across Jack's Rack, it took me until recently to do something about my hidden fetish.
One reason: I have met people who practice BDSM, and I have been supportive of them even though BDSM does not appeal to me. None of them knows that I like tickling; to them, I am vanilla boy. I have never been able to say anything or so much as ask them a question about tickling (which would have spared me a lot of negative self-image) because they go on and on about how ridiculous the tickle fans are, how pain cannot be warm and controlled during tickling, and all this other stuff.
I no longer associate with them.
Now that I have admitted to myself that I have this non-vanilla interest, I realize that I am open to friendship with BDSM people who are open to accepting that I like what I like even if they do not like it. Otherwise, however, I am tired of being made to think that what they like is good while what I like is bad.
Even the book I have just read, When Somene You Love is Kinky, defends practices that make my skin crawl but only mentions tickling pejoratively (basically something to avoid/something to make sure you say you are against in negotiations--and this happenes about four or five times, too). Yet, its authors foster the lie of the open-minded kink community.
People on this board seem to think that the BDSM community is open-minded. I say: There must certainly be some cool, progressive people in it, but on the whole they are a bunch of hypocrites.
That rant felt good. I have been waiting for years to say it!