Am I alone on this?

[doseone]

I posted this on the fetlife group and was urged to post it on here as well. As I'm one of the few males who really likes being tickled. However to me, it's not a sexual thing but more of a way to relax and get rid of stress. My problem is when I've opened up about this to my friends(who are female) they all seem to freak or weirded out by it.

So I thought I'd see if anyone else is having this trouble and what advice/feedback you'd give me. Part of me wonders if I'm bringing it up in the wrong way, or is it a matter of me being perhaps to open/forthcoming about it?

Also I should note I don't like guys touching me, so I wouldn't feel comfortable having another guy tickle me. As I just have an unusual hang up with men touching me thanks to some bad family issues. Anyway thanks for reading, and I look forward to the feedback.

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

Not sexual... at all?

At all......?

 

[Knox The Hatter]

"My problem is when I've opened up about this to my friends(who are female) they all seem to freak or weirded out by it."

Your uh...erm....vanilla friends? Why would you ask them? If you're not a past-master salesman with an extraordinary technique, isn't that like pissing in a headwind?

There are TMF folks in the Pacific Northwest who understand your needs, trust me, you're better off finding friends here, or on Fetlife 🙂

 

[socktickler86]

"My problem is when I've opened up about this to my friends(who are female) they all seem to freak or weirded out by it."

Your uh...erm....vanilla friends? Why would you ask them? If you're not a past-master salesman with an extraordinary technique, isn't that like pissing in a headwind?

There are TMF folks in the Pacific Northwest who understand your needs, trust me, you're better off finding friends here, or on Fetlife 🙂

You don't necessarily know friends are 'vanilla' until you ... well, basically ask 🙂

And let's be honest, if it came down to being able to enjoy this little kink with a friend you know and trust vs. some random people whom you know about as much as you know your garbage man, I'd go for the former any day! Besides, it's not like you're saying you like murdering cats or something that guarantees a friend would never speak to you again if you mentioned it.

 

[Ticklish9's]

After you know them long enough, any friends who are sufficiently close will figure it out. I think all my close friends know I really like tickling, even though I have only outright told one or two.

 

[MrTicklefeet]

Well, there's always the sensual massage people. Be sure to ask ahead of time if this is something they're into.

 

[bftk2005]

I like to be tickled also and just like you, I only like it when women tickle me. For me, it's never really been a problem getting it too happen. I don't know about all this vanilla stuff, but most women I know enjoy tickling guys. But I don't know to what extent you want to be tickled. No I have never asked a woman to tie me up and tickle me but most of my female friends have attempted to poke my side or ribs. When they do I make sure to give them a good reaction and laugh and they always seem to enjoy finding out that I am ticklish. Then in playful situations, tickling always seems to occur.

 

[MaleTickleeDC]

Men really are from Mars and women really are from Venus. We communicate differently and are wired differently, and most of us men are just grasping at straws when we try to convince a woman of anything. Heck, there's a reason we call it "getting LUCKY." Because it's 90 percent luck for us men.

I've had reactions from females when I've brought up tickling that range from outright fear to an immediate tickle fight. Do I have any idea what causes the disparate reactions? Nope. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to it. I even knew a girl in college who was clearly a ticklephile, as she liked to tickle guys all the time. I told a buddy who also knew her that I thought it was hot that she liked to tickle guys. Naturally it got back to her. She was totally weirded out. Instead of tickling me, like I hoped she would, she stopped tickling ANYONE when I was around.

Yeah, girls are complex like that.

 

[magic fingers]

You're definitely NOT alone. I'm also a male ticklee, and I feel like I'm in the minority, even on this forum. It seems like 75% of the posts on the TMF are all about M/F tickling(not that I'm complaining about that, but I wouldn't mind some more F/M). I have known a couple of women in my life who enjoy tickling guys, but they are few and far between, and it seems like a lot of women "grow out of it" after college. I don't know if there are any foot parties in the northwest, but if you ever come out to the mid-Atlantic, you might want to check out John's foot parties in Philly. He has a couple every month, and there are lots of hot girls who love having their feet worshipped and tickled, and they often like to tickle back. In fact there's 1 lovely young lady at those parties who tickles the hell out of me every time we have a session, and we both love it.

 

[Barney Stubble]

Doseone,

You are definitely not alone. Your reasons for enjoying tickling are perfectly legitimate and many share them, I'm sure. Unfortunately, there are a lot of narrow-minded attitudes everywhere as shown by the women you mention and more than a few I've known myself.

What's even more unfortunate is when those narrow-minded attitudes creep their way right here in the TMF as perfectly demonstrated by this response

Not sexual... at all?

At all......?

I guess it takes all kinds. The best you can do Doesone is to identify these attitudes quickly and move on. I'm convinced there are more people without them than with.

 

[BlackestLily]

I posted this on the fetlife group and was urged to post it on here as well. As I'm one of the few males who really likes being tickled. However to me, it's not a sexual thing but more of a way to relax and get rid of stress. My problem is when I've opened up about this to my friends(who are female) they all seem to freak or weirded out by it.

So I thought I'd see if anyone else is having this trouble and what advice/feedback you'd give me. Part of me wonders if I'm bringing it up in the wrong way, or is it a matter of me being perhaps to open/forthcoming about it?

Also I should note I don't like guys touching me, so I wouldn't feel comfortable having another guy tickle me. As I just have an unusual hang up with men touching me thanks to some bad family issues. Anyway thanks for reading, and I look forward to the feedback.

Whenever I read issues (or have issues) like this, I try to think of it in the vanilla perspective by inserting a fetish I have zero interest in.

If someone said to me, "I enjoy wearing rubber. It doesn't do anything sexual for me, only relaxes me." I suppose my first thought would be...yeah right. How could that possibly be relaxing...or at the very least NOT be sexual?

Perhaps that's the same way they view tickling, something not enjoyable in the least bit to them so they cannot understand how it could be so for you.

Out of curiosity, are you telling them because they genuinely want to know, or because you'd like it if they tickled you? If you're hoping for play, perhaps it's best to stick to trying with people you're in a relationship with, or someone who is fetish oriented like a member of fetlife. This is me being presumptuous though as I don't know if this is the case.

In either case, best of luck!

 

[Some1Getme]

You are definitely not alone. I am a male lee as well, and like others said, we are a minority here at TMF and in the real world. I tried a different approach but it still didn't work. I tried playfully poking a few female friends, just to break any tension in the room. It worked for like a second but when they asked me why did it seem like I ALWAYS tried to get myself tickled, I was honest and told them about my love for it. Needless to say, that didn't help me at all. One friend even said its not suppose to be that way. The guy is suppose to tickle the girl. And here I am today, tickless and trying to figure out how to get tickles somewhere

 

[kucheeku]

I've met many men who enjoy being a ticklee whether with girls or guys. Such guys should communicate with and support each other because, yes, you will be ridiculed by some. I'm sorry to hear about your family issues and I hope you are seeking out counseling for that (not the tickling).

 

[Sunriseticklee]

As I posted on FetLife- I don't agree that people who don't want to tickle you or be tickled by you are narrow-minded. I find it strange that some of us as tickle lovers (although on varying degrees) don't get it that everyone isn't going to understand or accept what we enjoy so much. And instead of realizing that how THEY feel is perfectly normal (as opposed to what we feel), we classify them as close-minded or that they aren't the right friends just because they don't want to blindly feed into our desires regardless of their own comfort zones.

Sure- I've had a lot of friends tickle me, and I've tickled a lot of friends, and no.... it wasn't sexual to me. But had I told them what I know about myself right now, I'm pretty sure the tickle games would NOT have happened as frequently. (lol- NO ONE in my family who knows even attempts to even try to tickle me anymore. Yes they know that I wouldn't consider it sexual, but they also know as much as it would weird them out, I would be completely FREAKED OUT as well.)

I know it is more acceptable in a physical relationship. Every single one of my boyfriends knew I was into tickling. I never found myself dealing with a lack of understanding why people who are clearly not into tickling weren't into it. Nor have I ever asked them (or myself) why they felt that way and if there was something wrong with them because they just weren't going to tickle me as much as I liked.

Takes a bit of maturity to realize that we are different, it is NOT the norm, we can't force people who don't like it to understand or to indulge. That's why we have friends with various interests and from diverse backgrounds. We don't dump the ones who don't get it, but we know that we should also spend a bit more energy seeking those who do like tickling. Not that they will want to tickle us either (they might- might not). LOL But there is a bigger chance that we might get what we desire by surrounding ourselves with people who desire the same things instead of continuing to try to get different results from the same set of circumstances. (i.e. asking vanilla people to tickle us and not understanding why they want to run away.)

 

[ticklebunny 2]

I think you make a very good and a very solid and a truly valid point Sunriseticklee. Lets face it it is true like you said-yeah compared to the intensity of many other various fetishes out there-tickling is pretty tame and not really scary-not really too intense-least that is in my honest opinion. However sadly lets face it tickling for many "vanilla" individuals out there-"vanilla couples" sounds and seems very out there and "bizarre" to them. A lot of the vanilla world really doesn't understand and can not even start to grasp or truly get why tickling is such a huge turn on for us as individuals and also for many married couples/couples-single forum members on this forum and on other tickle forums-or couples into tickling-not members at tickle forums. A huge majority of the vanilla world/vanilla couples not into tickling out there-don't see/don't know it as a personal turn on sexually/or for lighthearted fun/entertainment-don't even grasp and have no desire to wish to learn/know why tickling is such a turn on to us and many couples, married couples, and others tuned into tickling for one reason or another-sexually, stress relief, or just plain ornery playful fun w acquaintances and friends online or outside online- or for singles looking for tickle fun/other singles out there looking for their tickle soul mates.

You are right we all as individuals are very differently wired. We don't all like the same things. If we did it would be a very boring and tedious world/living existence that is for sure. Yeah while at first it would feel comfortable and convenient emotionally/familiarity comfort level-relating tickle kink wise-after a while-lose its novelty-would be boring and predictable. It would not challenge us-all would be alike if we all liked the same things/ex same food, same color, same hobbies, same clothes- tickling in the same ways-without variety-I am sure you get the picture on what I am saying. Our individual personal preferences as forum members make us unique and special-our special personal kinks along with tickling-sets us each apart as independent and special-one of a kind. As forum members and as members to the human race-we all have our separate differences and our own brand/streak of being eccentric and bit odd/bizarre that makes us unique. If we can have our own special differences/personal preferences on what we enjoy-sensual kinks-tickle kinks and such....those in the vanilla world have just as much right equally to have the same.

It does take maturity like Sunriseticklee said to accept that as a whole all of us enjoying and finding tickling sensual and a turn on-lighthearted and fun entertainment-pleasurable and fun is very much not the norm outside this forum and other tickle forums-out there in the vanilla world. Sadly many times whether the kink be tickling, kissing, oral sex, bondage, BDSM, or ect yeah sometimes you will find those in this forum and others on other tickle/ fetish forum sites-that will have the same kink as you- but other times you might find differences even on a tickle / fetish forum website you are an active member on. More times than not-you are going to find many that are not going to embrace your love/kink of tickling, other personal sensual/sexual kinks that make you-"you" -fellow members on tickle /fetish sites or in vanilla world more than likely-may or may not understand-could or may not be open to giving your tickle kink or kinks a fair shot. Many times sadly there is going to be harsh views/not going to be embraced/seen as freaky, scary, and not going to be understood-but sadly that is going to happen.

Just because you have a love/kink for tickling and personal preferences on other activities and kinks/fetishes you find hot or sexy-total turn on-doesn't mean it is immediately going to be the same-doesn't mean it is going to be liked by another fellow forum member or people / person-those you interact with on a daily basis out there in the world. Sometimes you will be fortunate-you will feel comfortable in your own skin-confide slowly what kinks you enjoy-tickling is a turn on for you-you won't be judged harshly-might be open minded and might be curious to learn more about your tickle or various kinks that make you "you" -other times sadly more times than not-you will judged quickly and the kinks that make you " you " not be embraced-but looked down upon-rejected. While this sucks it sadly is just how it can go. While this hurts badly -sucks-everyone has the right just like us/like you to only do what he or she feels comfortable with and enjoys-don't find scary or freaky-what makes him or her feel good/doesn't make them feel bad. I guess just best to say-to each their own-you only know what is going to make you happy and in the end no matter what you got to be true to you-don't settle-find what truly makes you happy-at end of the day-you got to learn to embrace the kinks that make you "you" and be happy with it-kinks and one's special traits make you- "you"

 

[J.D.Pathfinder]

I'm a male ticklee as well. I CAN get sexual satisfaction from it but thankfully its only with my girlfriend. When anyone else tickles me it doesn't turn me on at all. I don't talk about it with vanilla friends at all for fear of how they'd react.. or that they'd take advantage o///o;

But I also agree- I wouldn't want another male to tickle me.

 

[3xPIN]

If it isn't sexual and you just need it to relax, it is not hard to understand that people would find that weird. Also, being uncomfortable with guys touching you is counterproductive to relaxation.

But their varied reactions aren't uncommon. After all, liking tickling, albeit sexual or for relaxation, is rather queer. So being 'weirded out' is somewhat a natural reaction. But 'freaking'? That is a bit much for liking the way tickling feels. Of course I don't know your approach so I don't know how to give you advice on this. I don't know how 'open/forthcoming you are being.

But My question is: Are these friends just female or are they female friends? What I mean is are these your Girlfriends or flirtatious friends? Or are they just females you know and get along with? And are you asking them to tickle you? I guess to give you help I need more info.

 

[Ishaanshah]

As I posted on FetLife- I don't agree that people who don't want to tickle you or be tickled by you are narrow-minded. I find it strange that some of us as tickle lovers (although on varying degrees) don't get it that everyone isn't going to understand or accept what we enjoy so much. And instead of realizing that how THEY feel is perfectly normal (as opposed to what we feel), we classify them as close-minded or that they aren't the right friends just because they don't want to blindly feed into our desires regardless of their own comfort zones.

Sure- I've had a lot of friends tickle me, and I've tickled a lot of friends, and no.... it wasn't sexual to me. But had I told them what I know about myself right now, I'm pretty sure the tickle games would NOT have happened as frequently. (lol- NO ONE in my family who knows even attempts to even try to tickle me anymore. Yes they know that I wouldn't consider it sexual, but they also know as much as it would weird them out, I would be completely FREAKED OUT as well.)

I know it is more acceptable in a physical relationship. Every single one of my boyfriends knew I was into tickling. I never found myself dealing with a lack of understanding why people who are clearly not into tickling weren't into it. Nor have I ever asked them (or myself) why they felt that way and if there was something wrong with them because they just weren't going to tickle me as much as I liked.

Takes a bit of maturity to realize that we are different, it is NOT the norm, we can't force people who don't like it to understand or to indulge. That's why we have friends with various interests and from diverse backgrounds. We don't dump the ones who don't get it, but we know that we should also spend a bit more energy seeking those who do like tickling. Not that they will want to tickle us either (they might- might not). LOL But there is a bigger chance that we might get what we desire by surrounding ourselves with people who desire the same things instead of continuing to try to get different results from the same set of circumstances. (i.e. asking vanilla people to tickle us and not understanding why they want to run away.)

I can see your point, Dude!