Anyone else uncomfortable seeing your significant other get tickled?

[ashbabe410]

My boyfriend's friends and brother seem to have a thing for tickling him in front of me. They've done it 3 or 4 times in the last couple of months to the point I almost get anxiety about us being around them.

He's my dominant so it kinda makes me cringe watching him get wrecked. I don't mean a poke to the ribs either. They literally pin him to the floor, hold his arms above his head and tickle the hell out of him until he's screaming and begging them to stop. He always says "baby don't watch" when it's clear that's what they're going to do, but I think me leaving the room every time is making them do it even more bc I'm a cringing, blushing mess every time and desperately looking anywhere except at my big strong man getting tickle wrecked right in front of me.

I know some people love seeing their partner be tickled, but surely I can't be the only one who gets uncomfortable watching her normally dominant, alpha male boyfriend turned into a giggling, begging mess! Anyone else?

 

[WickedTouch]

Yes, but not so much from the standpoint of it feeling like it compromises a power dynamic. We're both switches and are used to seeing each other in both roles. Very few people in the normal social circles of our everyday lives would try to tickle us (and we generally prefer it that way). In the kink world, that is different, as we sometimes meet with others for sessions as a couple. But for those, we do have feelings of jealousy and insecurity that we have to process and manage. People we’ve met with have commented on how relaxed, comfortable, and easy going we are about everything, but honestly a lot of intentional work has gone into us communicating to understand where each of us our with things individually and as a couple, as well as building trust and respect between us. It has not been easy, but it has been worth it.

In everyday life and in maybe 75% of our kink play between us, I am a more dominant energy and she is a more submissive energy. When another woman tickles me in a session, my wife loves it. Obviously there’s a spark of jealousy and uncanniness to the whole thing, but she really gets into the idea, and ultimately enjoys seeing a different angle to my vulnerability. When she is being tickled, I can feel the same way. I can be a little more protective of her when we’re meeting with another couple and the guy is tickling her, but we also exercise a lot of discretion in choosing play partners. With all the pre-work we put into it, we’ve not only gotten fun, safe experiences out of it, but we’ve learned a lot about each other and actually grown even closer by doing it.

I want to emphasize that this is definitely not for everyone and I completely understand and respect those who do not make room for this in their relationships. People and personalities can be wildly different, and therefore each relationship is different. Some people get turned on by their partner getting tickled by someone else, some get repulsed, and others are okay enough with it as long as they get their turn. None of them are wrong.

 

[tickle_prince]

That's a really good answer Wicked,

I think it just depends on the couple, I've not experience it myself so I can't really answer it, I have in the past thought about Ex's being tickled even people I know now, and I am a rather visual ler, so the sound and sight of it can drive me crazy, so from a teasing stand point, I can imagine it and it does excite me at that thought. But I think it just depends on the person your in a relationship with, some people find kink stuff, tickle stuff very personally to them, due to the vulnerable of the act and the control you can have over a person your tickling. So I totally can understand its not everyone cup of tea if you were seeing your partner being tickled in front of you, why you might find it 'cringe' or uncomfortable. I suppose this is a very relevant topic currently you see a lot of people wanting to have their partner tickled in front of them, supporting it, so its nice to read a thread from the other side of that argument, just to see what discussion it might create! so thanks for posting this Ash

 

[ashbabe410]

That's a really good answer Wicked,

I think it just depends on the couple, I've not experience it myself so I can't really answer it, I have in the past thought about Ex's being tickled even people I know now, and I am a rather visual ler, so the sound and sight of it can drive me crazy, so from a teasing stand point, I can imagine it and it does excite me at that thought. But I think it just depends on the person your in a relationship with, some people find kink stuff, tickle stuff very personally to them, due to the vulnerable of the act and the control you can have over a person your tickling. So I totally can understand its not everyone cup of tea if you were seeing your partner being tickled in front of you, why you might find it 'cringe' or uncomfortable. I suppose this is a very relevant topic currently you see a lot of people wanting to have their partner tickled in front of them, supporting it, so its nice to read a thread from the other side of that argument, just to see what discussion it might create! so thanks for posting this Ash

Yes, the vulnerability thing is definitely the issue I think. If they didn't insist on holding him down to do it, it MIGHT not make me so uncomfortable. I don't like him being unable to stop it. The one time I did intervene bc it had been going on for what felt like forever and I was afraid he couldn't breathe bc his face was red and he had gone into that silent laughter and I did NOT want to see him pass out from it. UGH no. But anyway once I intervened and managed to stop them, my boyfriend and I couldn't make eye contact with each other and his friends teased him mercilessly for the rest of the night about me saving him, so I haven't intervened again since and I just go to another room and cover my ears bc I can't stand to hear him scream, lol.

 

[P[a]pi]

If your bf doesn't like it, then he shouldn't allow it. If he knows you don't like it, then he could also not allow it.

If it really bothers you, then you may have to request that he make it stop. For example, stop hanging out with them.

 

[ashbabe410]

If your bf doesn't like it, then he shouldn't allow it. If he knows you don't like it, then he could also not allow it.

If it really bothers you, then you may have to request that he make it stop. For example, stop hanging out with them.

I'm afraid it would seem like an overreaction go stop hanging out with them since they are his lifelong best friends and his brother. As far as him not allowing it, there's not much he can do since there are 3 of them and 1 of him. I'm pretty sure they'd think I was crazy if I made him tell them not to tickle him bc I can't stand watching it, lol. Think about how weird that would sound.