Are Websites like MYSPACE to blame for child molestors?

[ViperGTS]

I am sick and tired of all these news stories about how dangerous websites like MySpace is, and that kids shouldn't be allowed on them.

Now, IrishGirl and I met via MySpace.

Personally, I think that if you really are worried about your son or daughter being stalked online, then you obviously did not teach your children properly. I understand looking every now and then to see what they are up to, but if you honestly think that they are going to get themselves into trouble online, you obviously didn't teach your kid what's safe and what's not, and you don't trust that they are smart enough to figure out what's dangerous.

We all know that there are sickos out there. People need to stop blaming websites and their creators, who are trying to make places for people to make friends and bring people together that have similar interests. The sickos will go wherever their 'prey' is.

When I was in elementary school, we were warned about "The Man In The Grey Car." He was a child molester who stalked school playgrounds.

Yet no one ever blamed the architect who built the school.

 

[venray]

There is an inherent problem with any online site where kids (minors) and adults mix without knowing who is who.....

You may be tired of hearing it and want to look the other way, but the fact is that in my state alone 3 kids were molested because they hooked up with the wrong people that they "met" at myspace....

As long as this stuff happens you will continue to hear about it< Bro....you can ignore the problem, but it wont go away...

 

[grippedchimp]

If you ask me mate, they're to blame for the spawning of those useless bloody emos, with their self-taken moody pictures, moaning about non-existent, writing about cutting themselves, saying they have no friends when they're part of a whole clique, being bisexual and gay for the sake of it, and threatening suicide. That's the real problem in MySpace today. If they wanna die so much, why not put them on a desert island and do away with the problem.

 

[Mastertank1]

It isn't the fault of the tool

Any powerful tool can always be used for good or evil. The evil is no more to be blamed on the tool than the good is to be credited to the tool. Does the company that makes test tubes get the credit when the cure for a disease emerges from one of their tubes? Of course not. No more does it get the blame when a biowarfare organism is made in one of their tubes. It's the same with MySpace. It's only a tool, which can be used for good or bad purposes.

The unfortunate thing is that we live in a society where no one is willing to take responsibility for their own actions or lack thereof anymore, and NO I'M NOT SAYING IT'S THE KID'S OWN FAULT!!!! I'm saying it's the parents who fail to adequately supervise their kids who cry the loudest to have myspace regulated or shut down. I have a 14 year old niece, and she is an avid user of myspace. I help my brother and his wife monitor her usage and contacts on myspace.

About two years ago, a guy who claimed to be 13 was pressing really hard for a face to face meeting. (This was not on myspace, but on a very similar site)She was then 12. My brother and I unobtrusively were at the meeting place at the appointed time. There was no 13 year old boy. There was a man in his early 40's, wearing the identifying garments of the boy she was to have met. We pointed this out to my niece, and sent her home with her mother. My brother and I then had a conversation with the would be molester of my niece. I think he may be out of the hospital soon.

BUT: I don't blame anything on myspace, and do not wnt to see it regulated or shut down. I want to see parents do their jobs, the way I helped my brother do it. 😡

Call the cops? Too much concern for the molester's 'rights'. Far as I'm concerned, a molester has none. 😡 😡 😡 😡 😡

Mastertank1

 

[ViperGTS]

As long as this stuff happens you will continue to hear about it.

That basically means that as long as there are sexual deviants out there who like to prey on children, people will never take responsibility for their kids being retarded online.

And it's a shame, because it's true. :-/

 

[Aachen1983]

I have to agree with viper on this. Yes, child molesters can stalk on myspace, but they also pull up to children walking home from schools and grab them into their vehicles. Should we get rid of vehicles? Parents need to do a good job of warning their kids about the internet. Good topic to start viper.

I'm on myspace too, look up nachtjager.

 

[venray]

Ah so as a kid your parents watched over you 24/7..you never found a way to sneak out or do anything behind their backs....

I get it...It is all their fault....

That means no teenager has access to drugs or alchohol as long as the parents are doing their job, so why regulate......

 

[Aachen1983]

Ah so as a kid your parents watched over you 24/7..you never found a way to sneak out or do anything behind their backs....

I get it...It is all their fault....

That means no teenager has access to drugs or alchohol as long as the parents are doing their job, so why regulate......

You make a VERY good argument venray. I found ways around rules and stuff. However, it isn't websites like myspace's fault for pedophiles. It isn't the internets fault for pedophiles. I never tried to meet older people on the internet. Why? Because my Mother explained to me what might happen. And here we go, something most kids don't do, I LISTENED.

 

[venray]

The problem is that it is an easy access for those they prey on kids to find them.....and lure them....

AS for regulation of the sites..I say under aged should not be allowed into places such as that on line....

Kids dont need to "socialize" over the internet....too many problems arise when they do...

Just my opinion, but the author of this thread stated he was tired of hearing about how bad these places are...No one said that adults should not be able to use them...just kids...

I for one dont see the need for interacting with minors on line....perhaps others dont feel the same....

 

[Aachen1983]

OK venray

I see your point. Some of you may remember when I met the 17 year old girl for dinner. She told me she was 19. We had met on myspace. I too feel that there should be age limits on websites like that too. Thank you for clearing it up better for me.

Dave

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

While I tend to agree with Ray about minors and adults not mixing online, there is another issue here. MySpace is being used by predators. While it's not the fault of MySpace for the fact that this is so, it DOES bring up a couple of questions...

1) Should the folks at MySpace require some sort of proof of age to join and then seperate the user base access?
IMO, MySpace has done a decent job of setting up a place for people to connect. They've posted numerous warnings about not giving out too much private information. I seem to recall hearing something about them offering information and contacts to parents, investigators, etc. If this is so, then their legal responsibility is covered.

However.... I think this whole issue points out exactly what Ray was saying about the supposed NEED to socialize online. We do so in forums like this. But, as adults, we (hopefully) are smart enough to not pass on too much personal information. Even given that fact, we sometimes have people join, only to start posting things that I would be thrilled to see if I were some sort of sicko. If an adult isn't smart enough to not post information that could put them in danger, why should we expect kids to be...esp. if their parents aren't any smarter than some of those we see as adults are?

2) Why should the media NOT put the word out about a place where kids are being preyed upon?

The media spends all sorts of time on useless stories that basicly amount to gossip about things in the personal lives of celebs that's none of our damned business...and doesn't belong in the news to begin with. I rarely see complaints about that. Why shouldn't they cover something that is a real danger? Depending on who you listen to, most are not blaming MySpace. But, most are challenging them to take a closer look. In the meantime, they're warning the parents of those very kids who we hope have already been taught about internet safety. If they have yet to have that little chat with their kids, maybe it will prompt them to do so. Frankly, I don't see any harm in that.

Just some food for thought.

Ann

 

[venray]

Thank you love....that was exactly what I was trying to get at...well put..

 

[venray]

NEW HAVEN, Conn. -- Two men used the Web site MySpace.com to set up sexual encounters with underage Connecticut girls, authorities said Thursday in what they described as the first federal sex cases involving the popular networking site.


The two unrelated cases come after weeks in which the site's potential dangers have been the topic of discussion for law enforcement, parents and school officials nationwide.

"The Internet has allowed people to invade our own homes, to have conversations with our children in the privacy of our own homes without us ever knowing about it," U.S. Attorney Kevin O'Connor said.

In one case, Sonny Szeto, 22, traveled from Jersey City, N.J., to Connecticut in October and molested an 11-year-old girl in her playroom while her parents slept upstairs, according to an FBI affidavit.

In the other case, Stephen Letavec, 39, molested a 14-year-old Connecticut girl in his car while visiting from Elrama, Pa., in October, according to another FBI report. The FBI said Letavec made several visits to see the girl between last summer and January.

"I showed you what love is and how it feels," Letavec wrote in an e-mail found in the girl's school locker, according to the FBI report. "I want to show you how making love feels too, not just sex because there is a difference."

The girl signed onto MySpace as an 18-year-old, but told Letavec she was 14 before he visited, the FBI said.

Both men face federal interstate sex charges. Szeto, who has since moved to Queens, N.Y., was ordered placed on house arrest with his parents in Nashua, N.H. As of Thursday morning, prosecutors said he was still being held until his family could post $600,000 bond and cancel his Internet connection.

A message was left with the public defender's office, which represented Szeto.

Letavec, a volunteer firefighter, is being held without bond pending his arraignment in Connecticut. He was represented in Pennsylvania by a public defender, W. Penn Hackney, who would not comment and it was not immediately clear who his attorney would be in Connecticut.

MySpace, a division of News Corp., allows its 54 million users to find online friends by searching for their school or their interests. The site prohibits minors 13 and under from joining, discourages users from posting personal information and provides special protections for those 14 and 15.

"While we cannot comment on specific investigations, MySpace works with law enforcement at every level and fully supports the arrest and prosecution of those individuals found guilty of criminal offenses," MySpace said in a statement released Thursday.

While Internet safety advocates say the site has a good reputation for working to prevent illegal activity, they say children often lie about their age to get around those restrictions. Many profiles include suggestive photographs and lots of personal information.

Messages were left Thursday seeking comment from the company.

O'Connor said MySpace isn't at fault but rather is being exploited by pedophiles. But he raised concerns by some MySpace functions, including one that allows users to search for people who are questioning their sexual orientation.

And he said he would have "very serious reservations" about letting his own young children use such sites.

"MySpace should be completely innocent. Children should be allowed to go on MySpace and meet their own peers and have conversations with them," said FBI Agent Thomas Veivia. "But the people with nefarious intentions exploit that technology and target our children."

Police in Middletown, Conn., are investigating recent reports that as many as seven local girls were sexually assaulted by men in their 20s who contacted them through MySpace pretending to be teenagers.

Veivia said MySpace is getting a lot of attention but predicts that, like Internet Relay Chats and American Online chat rooms, it will soon give way to new technology that children and young adults will start using _ with sexual predators and law enforcement following.

 

[venray]

Fourth Town Arrests man for MySpace.com Meeting

FARMINGTON -- Farmington is the fourth town to arrest a Berlin man for sexually assaulting a 13-year-old he had met on the Internet Website, MySpace.com.

Police say the suspect -- Kevin Karbownik -- took the girl to locations in Berlin, Bristol and Plainville, to have sex. He told her he was 17, when he is actually 21.

The new charge claims Karbownik had sex with the victim at a construction site in Farmington last summer.

 

[venray]

NYC Man Charged For Using MySpace.com

BRIDGEPORT (AP)- A 22-year-old New York City man has been charged with using the Internet to set up a sexual encounter with a Connecticut girl half his age.

Federal officials say Sonny Szeto traveled from New York City to Fairfield County to sexually assault an eleven-year-old girl he had been contacting using the MySpace dot com Web site

A federal magistrate in Bridgeport allowed Szeto to be freed on 600-thousand dollars bond. As a condition of his released, he must remain under home confinement with his parents in Nashua, New Hampshire.

Prosecutors say Szeto first made contact with the girl in September. The girl gave Szeto directions to her home in rural Fairfield County. He allegedly traveled to her home late at night and visited the girl in the family's playroom, while her parents slept upstairs.


All three of these were in today's news alone....there are many other cases just like them....

 

[TicklishLurker]

The problem isn't with sites like MySpace. The problem is with our joke of a justice system that doesn't punish pedophiles properly to begin with. (You know, I checked the Megan's Law website and found close to a dozen registered sex offenders - all whom raped children 14 and younger - living with in 10 blocks of my home, and some living within two blocks of the local elementry school.) It also lies with improper parenting and websites like Google Earth that can locate anyone, including people who have private phone numbers.

Of course, I believe there should be a global law that prevents anyone under 18 from being on the internet in the first place. But damn it, parents, stop expecting the rest of the world from doing your job. PARENT YOUR CHILDREN! Stop being so bloody lazy. You don't want to take the time to protect them, to punish them, to look after them the way a good parent should. That's what website filter technology is for. That's why a child should not have a computer in their own room but rather in the living room where you can check over their shoulder. That's why they should only be allowed online when you are home to monitor them.

MySpace wasn't even originally made for interaction between "normal" people - it was started by a failed musician for bands, singers, record producers, etc to promote and interact. Both Barry Manilow and Neil Diamond have profiles there. So does William Shatner, John Lovtiz (probably the only celeb who actually runs his own profile while the others are run by workers for the record companies or actors), Jamie Kennedy, and many others. It's "devolved" into a dating site now, sadly, but it was meant to help singers and other entertainers.

MySpace is not to blame. Lack of punishment and lack of parenting are.

 

[ViperGTS]

And there are how many sexual predator cases that have nothing to do with the internet?

Alright, let's get a couple things straight here. I think the reason this kind of thing upsets me is because I was raised better. I've been checking out this forum since I was quite young - 15 to be exact. Not signed up, but reading through it. I have been on my own for the majority of my short life. My mother would basically let me go out and play any time I wanted, and go anywhere I wanted. But, unlike these moron kids who think it's ok to meet up anyone online because it's probably safe (right), I knew what was right and what was wrong, and I knew what was safe and what wasn't. I also met IrishGirl on MySpace, and you all know how well that turned out.

I think it's my complete lack of tolerance for stupidity that makes this kind of thing such a touchy subject. If you're 15 and you arrange to meet with some random person from the internet that you haven't spoken to before ever in your life, maybe you deserve to have something negative happen to you so you will remember next time to stay the hell home unless you KNOW who you're talking to. And if you're a parent and you don't teach your kid the difference between right and wrong, and they go out to meet some guy they met on the internet that they thought was a 14 year old girl and turns out to be forty, fat and fugly, maybe both you and your dumass child need to be reminded how dangerous it can be.

Now, don't get me wrong, no child deserves death, so that's out of the question, but if it takes being molested by someone two or three times your age to get it through your thick damned skull that you DON'T GO WITH STRANGERS, so be it.

 

[venray]

if it takes being molested by someone two or three times your age to get it through your thick damned skull that you DON'T GO WITH STRANGERS, so be it.

I think not...and if monitoring, and age checks are to be implemented in order to save one...only one child from this experience...so be it...

What you are saying is that the average 11-14 year old believes what their parents say and listens to them...I can tell you have no kids....

You are also saying that if they dont listen to their parents, they should learn the hard way....

No....they should not...no more than they should learn not to drink and drive by killing a person or two...

Regulations are needed...wouldnt change your ability to go onto these sites and meet up with friends, but it would prevent minors from being lured by sickos...

I dont see why anyone would be against such regulation.....

 

[TicklishLurker]

Now, don't get me wrong, no child deserves death, so that's out of the question, but if it takes being molested by someone two or three times your age to get it through your thick damned skull that you DON'T GO WITH STRANGERS, so be it.

No one, no matter how stupid, deserves to be molested and/or raped. What it takes is good parenting.

Of course, when people focus on sites like MySpace, they totally ignore the fact that in most cases, a child is molested by someone they know. A parent, grandparent, teacher, etc. I have a cousin whom for years was brutally raped by his priest. The priest would take him and other boys on camping trips where he'd force himself on them. The church knew and did nothing. Bastard's in Hell now.

As for me, I was repeatedly sexually assaulted in jr. high by a group of boys with downs syndrome. We were all in a special PE class for kids who were mentally or physically handicapped, had bad asma(sp?), or basically anything that kept them from keeping up with the "normal" children. (I had cronic lung infections in jr. high, plus I was/am fat.) There was only one teacher for this class for the entire district. So he was always 15 minutes late. We'd gather and the boys would often rub themselves against me, grab my breasts, try to kiss me, etc. I never told anyone because my peers told me I was "so fat and ugly even a retard wouldn't want me" and because all my knowledge about DS at the time came from the show Life Goes On and the most that kid ever did was give a girl a quick peck on the cheek. So I thought between how fat & ugly I was/am and the fact these boys were all in special ed, no one would believe me. I never told anyone about it until two years ago.

So it's not just websites. But like I said, parents need to parent. Either monitor your kid's activity or don't allow them on the net at all. I know if I had a kid I wouldn't, not even if it's required for school. I'd rather then flunk a few classes then get mixed up with a predator.

 

[Tamia78]

And there are how many sexual predator cases that have nothing to do with the internet?

Alright, let's get a couple things straight here. I think the reason this kind of thing upsets me is because I was raised better. I've been checking out this forum since I was quite young - 15 to be exact. Not signed up, but reading through it. I have been on my own for the majority of my short life. My mother would basically let me go out and play any time I wanted, and go anywhere I wanted. But, unlike these moron kids who think it's ok to meet up anyone online because it's probably safe (right), I knew what was right and what was wrong, and I knew what was safe and what wasn't. I also met IrishGirl on MySpace, and you all know how well that turned out.

I think it's my complete lack of tolerance for stupidity that makes this kind of thing such a touchy subject. If you're 15 and you arrange to meet with some random person from the internet that you haven't spoken to before ever in your life, maybe you deserve to have something negative happen to you so you will remember next time to stay the hell home unless you KNOW who you're talking to. And if you're a parent and you don't teach your kid the difference between right and wrong, and they go out to meet some guy they met on the internet that they thought was a 14 year old girl and turns out to be forty, fat and fugly, maybe both you and your dumass child need to be reminded how dangerous it can be.

Now, don't get me wrong, no child deserves death, so that's out of the question, but if it takes being molested by someone two or three times your age to get it through your thick damned skull that you DON'T GO WITH STRANGERS, so be it.

Okay, I agree with Viper. I'm not saying that they deserve to die or anything, but if that's what it takes for them to get it thru their heads that meeting strangers on the net is bad, and to believe the news stories that they hear, I guess they will just have to learn the hard way.

I don't have any kids, but I'll be damned if my child were on the net possibly talking to some sick bastard. Venray is right also, that all the blame can't be placed on the parents......but where are they when their 12-or-13 year old has been talking to some 40 year old sicko for weeks, and they finally agree to meet somewhere, and the kid gets kidnapped or worse? The parents always claim they didn't know what was going on. Why Not???? Kids clearly don't always make the right decisions, I didn't when I was young. Hell, I still don't. But why are these parents letting their child use a computer in complete privacy, where they don't know what sites their child is visiting. In this day and age, children are way more computer literate than their parents, and that's really turning into a problem.

Anyways, that's my two cents...

--T

 

[kis123]

Most of you who are trying to blame parents for what these kids do obviously don't have children yourselves.

In today's 24/7/365 information age, it is nearly impossible for a parent to catch everything their kids do. You know, you have to sleep sometime! Besides, it's not always going on underneath your roof. It's happening when your kids visit their friends. It's happening at the library with ample access to computers. Are you saying I have to follow my kid to the library (mind you I'm probably at work trying to keep a roof over their head while this is taking place). Do I have to track my kid's every move? That's impossible to do nowadays! Yet I'm told I'm responsible for everything my kid does. There is a line that has to be drawn here. And no, I don't know where that line is. It was a lot more clear prior to access to the internet, now it's blurred.

Besides, today's teenager is more hard-headed than ever. What happens over the world every day would NEVER happen to them. Why? Because theythink they're smarter and more mature and that's what predators count on.

You can't tell many of these kids anything-they don't believe what their parents say. It's still our job to protect kids from themselves and the internet makes it a lot tougher.

It's really easy to dump all of this trash at parent's doorstep. For all of you who don't have kids, I'd be interested to hear and see how you'll be handling this in the next 10-20 years.

 

[venray]

Ray, maybe the solution is too make all Myspace pages for minors "private"; meaning no lurking/ surfing pedophiles or sexual predators could access a minor's site/ photo/ etc. I'm no internet expert, but it seems there could even be a way for kids (minors) who knew each other from school, church, etc (or adults with parents permission/ aunts, older siblings, teachers, etc) could be given a password so they could communicate.....while adults or kids without the password would be barred from access. .

In other words...regulate access....that is exactly what I have been saying....I never once said these sites should be shut down.....just monitored.....

 

[venray]

Most of you who are trying to blame parents for what these kids do obviously don't have children yourselves.

In today's 24/7/365 information age, it is nearly impossible for a parent to catch everything their kids do. You know, you have to sleep sometime! Besides, it's not always going on underneath your roof. It's happening when your kids visit their friends. It's happening at the library with ample access to computers. Are you saying I have to follow my kid to the library (mind you I'm probably at work trying to keep a roof over their head while this is taking place). Do I have to track my kid's every move? That's impossible to do nowadays! Yet I'm told I'm responsible for everything my kid does. There is a line that has to be drawn here. And no, I don't know where that line is. It was a lot more clear prior to access to the internet, now it's blurred.

Besides, today's teenager is more hard-headed than ever. What happens over the world every day would NEVER happen to them. Why? Because theythink they're smarter and more mature and that's what predators count on.

You can't tell many of these kids anything-they don't believe what their parents say. It's still our job to protect kids from themselves and the internet makes it a lot tougher.

It's really easy to dump all of this trash at parent's doorstep. For all of you who don't have kids, I'd be interested to hear and see how you'll be handling this in the next 10-20 years.

Lol...Kis...reminds me of the cell phone commercial where the Dad is everywhere his daughter is including ballet class and the school lunch line...

To those that think Myspace and others should take no responsibility:

Should parents monitor their kids...yes

Should parents teach them the dangers out there in the world....yes

Should websites exist that make it easy for anyone to gain easy access without any safety factored in.....NO..

These sites also need to take responsibility...

Viper mentioned that we "shouldnt close the schools" because predators frequent those areas.....True, BUT the schools have taken steps to better safeguard kids...even those who walk home....

When I went to grade school we came and went as we pleased....Now I have to have a picture ID just to drop of a forgotten homework assignment to the school office....the kids are never alone from the time they get to school until the time they get home....

These websites have opened up a hunting ground for the low lifes out there....they can "get to know" their "prey" for weeks and establish a "relationship" before attempting to lure their victims away....all from the privacy of their own computer....with little risk of actually getting caught before it is too late....

As Kis was saying...If you dont have kids, you have absolutely no real idea of how difficult it is to monitor them 24/7...especially for the single parents and households where both parents must work....

Times are different then when we grew up.....and far more dangerous...

The sites need to be regulated......

 

[isabeau]

i tried to join myspace some months back because members of this forum told me they belonged and wanted me to belong also. welllllllll everytime i did and entered my birthdate.... it said i wasnt of age. hmm o the irony. i mean how stupid is that????

isabeau

 

[aun_existe_amor]

My daughter has been using the internet since she was 5 years old. She's 7 now. She has the intelligence of an average 10 or 11 year old. I am always in the same room as her whenever she uses the computer and I know exactly which site she is on and what she is doing. I have created her own chatroom that she talks to her school friends in and only the people I have sent a link to can access this room. I have told her that if anyone she doesn't recognise tries to talk to her she must tell me immediately. When she is a teenager there is no way I am going to be able to monitor everything she does on the internet like I do now. That's just unrealistic. I have warned her about the dangers and will continue to warn her but that doesn't mean that one day she won't be fooled by someone friendly she thinks she can trust on the internet. How many ADULTS here have met up with people they only know from internet conversations? The people the ADULTS are meeting with from here could be rapists or murderers but ADULTS still take that risk. We can't possibly expect children to make mature decisions. It seems to me that the people who are blaming the parents have no idea what they are talking about and more than likely have no children of their own. Viper, you say you are 19 now but you joined in 2001. Was that with parental consent? Where were your parents then and why weren't they monitoring your every movement? You say you met irishgirl through a website and everything turned out great, good luck to you both, but things very well could have turned out differently. Would it have been your parents fault if something bad had happened to you and irishgirl wasn't who you thought she was? I think not. Kids these days are more streetwise and are made aware of dangers but that doesn't stop bad things happening to them through no fault of their own or the parents. Kids are not able to make mature adult decisions and therefore are taken advantage of no matter how mature they might think they are, and no matter how aware of possible dangers they are.