Can I have some advice from the women here

[tickleteasing]

I have at times talked to women online and have wondered if they were in fact women or were men pretending to be women. Let me bring up an incident that happened a few years ago. I was talking on aol with this lady and let me just say she did this completely without me asking she sent me a picture of her holding her vaginal lips open and a close up picture of her clitoris. This was without me asking her or saying anything at all she sent me this. Now I say in the next sentence would you like to talk on the phone, and she responds she is not comfortable with that yet. Maybe I am missing something here but isn't that kind of like putting the cart before the horse? Do you think this incident was a case of a man pretending to be a woman and secondly, how do you feel about all the men pretending to be women online? What would you classify as the tips to see if someone is pretending or not?

 

[reflexology414]

...

I can't speak to your specific incident, but I've been on the receiving end of instant messages and emails through this forum, which later turned out to be men posing as women. It's happened a few times, the last one being earlier this year.

I still don't understand why anyone does this... but they do.

Best of luck to you.

 

[dusty rhodes]

This was without me asking her or saying anything at all she sent me this. Now I say in the next sentence would you like to talk on the phone, and she responds she is not comfortable with that yet.

Could be someone underage,a man posing as a woman or a woman who is married or living with someone who likes to jerk guys around or some combination of the above.If you have been going back and forth online for long and can't get a phone number i would run not walk to the nearest exit.

 

[LindyHopper]

Dude... an actual woman..... would never have sent you an unsolicited picture of her hoo-ha. That was your first clue... and probably should have sufficed to be your last. But if it didn't, her refusal to talk on the phone was another red flag. It's a lot harder to fake your gender over the phone than over a keyboard. Many real women will wait a long time before agreeing to meet a man in person (it's a safety thing), but most don't show the same reluctance about a phone conversation.

 

[steph]

Ugh...another "I'm a dime-a-dozen" TMI nasty pig. A crotch shot but the slut can't talk to ya on the phone??? How boring and played out are these assholes? Please...
It's a boy hon, it's fronting (I expose "girls" here to gullible guys here on this all the time unfortunately)
For tips on how to to avoid, ask around, anyone on the up and up 'round here comes with references.
XOXO

 

[Johnny Ticklish]

Yeah, the pic was a dead give-away. No rocket science required here, folks. 😀

 

[chicago]

There are millions of people online and thousands on this forum. I have a few rules when talking to people.

1. No picture (of their face, not of their junk) then I don't talk to them.

2. If they talk like a retard, I don't talk to them.

3. If they annoy me in any way (asking to cyber, asking for feet pics, being lame) I don't talk to them.

4. If they're an f/f chick, they're probably a dude, and I won't talk to them.

That's just a few. Being a bitch has kept most of the crazies away as it is.

 

[PiedPiper]

Old fashioned

-- Twenty years ago, we just went to a nice bar. I would not be surprised if that still works. I had a good run without the Internet. The computer is not always your friend. The best way to handle your problem is to sidestep it completely....

 

[Mz Chaos]

Dude... an actual woman..... would never have sent you an unsolicited picture of her hoo-ha. That was your first clue... and probably should have sufficed to be your last. But if it didn't, her refusal to talk on the phone was another red flag. It's a lot harder to fake your gender over the phone than over a keyboard. Many real women will wait a long time before agreeing to meet a man in person (it's a safety thing), but most don't show the same reluctance about a phone conversation.

There are millions of people online and thousands on this forum. I have a few rules when talking to people.

1. No picture (of their face, not of their junk) then I don't talk to them.

2. If they talk like a retard, I don't talk to them.

3. If they annoy me in any way (asking to cyber, asking for feet pics, being lame) I don't talk to them.

4. If they're an f/f chick, they're probably a dude, and I won't talk to them.

That's just a few. Being a bitch has kept most of the crazies away as it is.

^ What they said +1

 

[tickleteasing]

She had a picture of her face, as well as a few other pictures but the pictures of her well you know what was sent usolicitied

 

[MrPartickler]

-- Twenty years ago, we just went to a nice bar. I would not be surprised if that still works. I had a good run without the Internet. The computer is not always your friend. The best way to handle your problem is to sidestep it completely....

Still works, thankfully...and it's a hell of a lot more fun than emailing someone for weeks to help them decide whether sending a picture or telling their first name is OK or not.

I have to say, though that if you're on a site like adultfriendfinder or Craigslist (casual encounters), being sent extremely revealing (i.e., TMI) photos--from folks who are probably real women--is not all that uncommon. However, once you're on a site like that, by default it's not completely "unsolicited" either.

That being said...definitely not interested.

 

[Stage Whisper]

In your case, I would say that was definitely a boy. I know I wouldn't send that sort of picture... hell. It takes a lot of trust on my part to send a picture of my face.

There are several reasons why someone might decide to pose as a girl or as a boy when they're really not. Maybe that's how they get their jollies, through RP or just pretending. Or maybe they're creeps who are looking for easy bait to do things to if you foolishly agree to meet them in person. Or it might be something else entirely, who knows?

 

[indivision]

Yeah, sometimes guys pretend to be girls in this community. I guess there area number of reasons for doing so. In your case, I think it's likely that you did come across one of these guys, though it's not definite.

For the most part, you just have to rely on your gut feelings when it comes to telling whether or not you're talking to an actual female or just a guy pretending to be a girl. If "she" doesn't send you a pic, then there's a fairly good chance that "she" is really a he. But it's not concrete proof. Also, pay attention to what "she" tells you. If her stories sometimes don't add up, or some of the things "she" says sound contradictory, then you may have a he in disguise on your hands. I think a lot of the guys who create female identities online often don't realize how much attention women tend to get in this community, and sometimes amidst all the suitors IMing them they find it hard to keep their information straight.

However, the fact that you DO get a picture from someone you are chatting with doesn't prove that the person is genuine. If I were going to pretend to be a woman (I wouldn't, just being hypothetical here), I could very easily send people pictures of my sister or just lift pics from some random girl's Myspace page and claim that it's me. Also, if any of you ladies get contacted by a girl who is into f/f, then you might want to see that as a red flag. Once again, it doesn't prove anything, but I think it is enough to raise suspicion.

I'm sure most people have already thought of this stuff. I just thought I would add it in.

 

[isabeau]

good grief that's the funniest thing ever...she is uncomfortable talking on the phone, yet shows you her privatetess places unasked? wow...people never fail to amaze me..she is either a man trying to fool you..or a female trying to play you..whichever drop her/him fast..

the internet is full of weirdos...wow..and fakers all over the place..

 

[Maestro1874]

I've never found it particularly hard to discern the gender-pretenders here, or on any other internet venue. Men posing as women simply don't sound like women. Usually, it's painfully obvious. Conversations that start with "U horny?" do NOT involve women on either end. Or "Hi! 19f, blond hair, blue eyes, ticklish all over, 44D want to cyber?" is also a good indication that your chat partner shares intimate body parts with which you are quite familiar.

Sometimes, I'll keep talking to them anyway because it amuses me. The best part is when, after fifteen minutes or so I can say, "So, not that I really care, but what gets you off about pretending to be a woman?"

You know, they NEVER respond...

-Maestro

 

[TeMpEsT949]

Sometimes, I'll keep talking to them anyway because it amuses me. The best part is when, after fifteen minutes or so I can say, "So, not that I really care, but what gets you off about pretending to be a woman?"

You know, they NEVER respond...

-Maestro

Haha that's pretty funny. But what if it happened to actually be a woman? Then she'd probably just be too embarrassed to respond 😛

I think I've run into a poser on here a couple times, but I ended the conversation before too long because I felt uncomfortable. It's bad enough when the first question a guy asks is about your feet, but when a "girl" does it? Ummm, delete...lol

 

[tickleteasing]

OH and you will love this she said she does not want to talk on the phone because guys get wierd on the phone.

 

[tickles]

That would be a very unlikely act from a woman. Primarily because I'm not convinced a woman would think of sending you a pic of her goodies. Maybe her tits if she was inclined to turn up the heat........anyway, I'm not sure how to describe this exactly....and it less apparent thru email coorespondence then IM, but I can generally tell what sex I am talking to by the "way" they respond. For instance, men have a tendency to not be a verbose as a women, often answering with short sentneces and not elaborating. Also, I think men respond a little slower than women....maybe they take their time....they think a bit more before responding......

This is obviously not fool proof....but little clues....

 

[huskys]

I don't know why weird ass guys do that, but its certainly not rare nowdays.
But I've got to be honest and say that any guy who falls for that load of shit must be extremely gullible, and/or desperate.
The points that LindyHopper and Giggle made are very valid and obvious.
Any chick that sent me pics of her genitals, weather solicited or not is either not a chick, or one I wouldn't be interested in anyway.
Everyone, male and female, has to be careful when online, and in forums. So take some of the good advice offered dude, and be careful!!!

 

[steph]

Yeah. I'm sure they do. Especially when confronted by callers about their DEEP MALE voice when they told you they were a fem. 🙄 Put this one on ignore and move on.
XOXO

OH and you will love this she said she does not want to talk on the phone because guys get wierd on the phone.

 

[Comfort Eagle]

Yeah. I'm sure they do. Especially when confronted by callers about their DEEP MALE voice when they told you they were a fem.
XOXO

Classic.

 

[steph]

Hey, the folks were in show business, shoot me, ok~you should see me live!😀
Seriously, though, right? I mean, what a tool this poser is.
XOXO

Classic.

 

[indivision]

Also, if you're talking to someone, and she sounds too much like most people's fantasies, then she's probably not who she says she is. For instance, if she says things like the following, then she's probably fake.

• Hey, I'm 5'5", blonde hair, blue eyes, slender, and ticklish all over and I want to be tickled while tied spread eagle to a four poster bed.
• I'm pretty with an athletic body, and I love to tickle and get tickled. I'm SUUUUUUUUUPER ticklish all over and I'm also a ruthless tickler.
• I'm a real good tickler. I love ticklish guys and I want to tie one down to my extra large bed and tickle him all over all night long with my long, sharp, manicured nails.
• Anything else indicating that she is drop dead georgous, extra-ticklish, a top notch tickler, likes to be tickle-tortured in the most sadistic way imaginable, or any combination of these.

Likewise, if she describes her tickling experiences, and it sounds too cool to imagine, then it probably is. If she says that she has a lot of 'lees that she frequently tickles, has been tied and tickled by a lot of people, or anything like that, then your radar should go off. Now, like before, none of these are enough to convict an IMer of online fetish fraud, but they are reasons to raise suspicion.

And once again, I'm sure most of us are smart enough to know most of this already, I just thought I would add it. And when I use words like "you" and "your," I'm using them in a collective manner, not directing them at any one person.

 

[feather my feet]

There have been alot of valid points brought up so far. Bottom line is...people can b any1 or anything online. Which is y I am cautious. Men have asked if they can call me after emailing or chatting only a few times. I've said if I'm uncomfortable & want 2 know some1 better b4 talking. Those who I did talk 2, I asked 4 his # & called from a blocked phone.

If some1 wants 2 meet w/o talking, I'd b leery. IF u do, go 2 a cafe or starbucks, etc. U can make it as short or long of a meeting u'd like & be in public in case of a creep. If they r married, they won't agree 2 meeting in a public place either. Another way 2 weed out.

The crotch shots? If real or an internet pic, thats low or no class...or a guy. "Hi, I don't want 2 talk 2 u, but heres a birds eye view of what my dr. sees." If ur on an adult sex site, MAYBE thats acceptable. Otherwise, NO! If it is really a female, would u really want 2 persue a relationship with some1 who openly shares her privates with any1???????????????? Think who else has seen that!