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Chuck Norris

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. :shock:
 
Chuck Norris once fought Bruce Lee because he just left the TMF and it wasnt the only way he could get close to one
 
*gives Ticklerguy4u a roundhouse kick in the face for blaspheming against Chuck Norris*
 
Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't fuck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
:yowzer: :yowzer: :yowzer: :yowzer:
 
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
 
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/0acN7g9rLLk"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0acN7g9rLLk" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>
 
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
 
In an average living room there are 1, 242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
 
One time while sparring with Wolverine, Chuck Norris accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its technical term: Jupiter.
:dogpile:
 
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
 
I can't believe I let this thread just die.....what the....?


A duck's quack does not echo. Chuck Norris is solely responsible for this phenomenon. When asked why he will simply stare at you, grimly.
 
Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot.
 
If You Have 5 Dollars And Chuck Norris Has 5 Dollars... Chuck Norris Has More Money Than You.
 
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a mountain that was in his way, causing the Cretaceous-Tertiary extinction.
 
All of Chuck Norris' speech is dubbed. Even when he is not doing movies. This is because if you heard his real voice, it's raw power and purity would cause your brain to implode and leak out of your nose...
 
Yay for Tickleterror and Nytoetapper........my new best friends! :Kiss2:
Thanks for keepin this thread alive....LONG LIVE CHUCK NORRIS!!!


Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don't be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.
 
If Chuck Norris spinning jump kicks you to the head in slow motion on Tuesday, when do you wake up?

October.
 
Thank you Tamia for making this thread what it is.

Chuck Norris Sold a Clone of Himself To All The Surrounding Countries Just Incase Germany Decided To Get Crazy Again
 
Chuick Norris once visited a bustling town in the Mediterranean. When the locals mocked his chest hair, he punched the ground and the town fell into the sea... The name of this town? Atlantis...
 
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