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Curroupt a Wish

Granted - but when they created more time, they accidentely destroyed everything fun in the world.

I wish it was cooler in here
 
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Granted. Now your ass is frozen to the seat.

I wish Christmas would never come.
 
Granted - but it's the day before xmas forever...which means everybody's either bitchy and rushing around or sickeningly sweet

I wish I was tired enough to go to sleep
 
Granted but they are from 20 years ago

I wish I was done with college
 
Granted... but its those 20 year old puddin pops

I wish we were back at Bella's 🙁
 
Granted, but you're the only one there.

I wish someone would tell me the new password to the radio show so I can get my show set up for Monday.

Snail Shell
 
Granted, the password is "borlange" but it must be spelled out using the characters from the Chinese alphabet.

I wish something exciting would happen today.
 
Granted - The most exciting thing will happen to you today ... but after it's done your thumbs will fall off.

I wish I could jam with Bruce Springsteen
 
Granted, but all the buttons are broken except 'Q'

I wish I hadn't busted my mp3 player.

Snail Shell
 
Granted. On your very first attempt, you split completely in half.

I wish I was somewhere else in America today.
 
Granted ... but that someplace else is Newark, New Jersey.

I wish I could breathe underwater AND like I normally do
 
Granted, but you got them mixed up, so your lungs are now filled with sea water.

I wish The Simpsons was still funny.

Snail Shell
 
Granted, but it's sophisticated humor and you don't understand it.

I wish Frank Zappa were still alive and making music.
 
Granted, but all of your Frank Zappa CD's turn to dust.




I wish that I had a million dollars.
 
Granted. One million dollars.....of Monopoly money.

I wish the football season lasted longer.
 
Granted, but to compensate for the cost of running the NFL another week, they have had to close down the Pittsburgh Steelers FOREVER! :devil:

(Wow, that was cruel)

I wish for something to console Slacker over the loss of the Pittsburgh Steelers... 😀

Snail Shell
 
Granted. Slacker is consoled by watching you get clubbed by a gang of angry baby seals.

(Don't fuck with my Steelers, mountie boy!) 😛

I wish I had some tasty dinner right now.
 
Granted....but it's my Scottish definition of "tasty". Enjoy your haggis.


I wish I didn't hear dead people's voices all the time.
 
Granted. You now just hear their dogs barking.

I wish I didn't have to pay taxes.
 
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