Curroupt a Wish

[Perduabo]

Granted, but then after lifting their veils, you discover they all have a flesh-eating virus.

I wish I could meet the shade of Oscar Wilde.

 

[slacker2114]

Granted. The shade from his favorite lamp is pleased to meet you.



I wish I were not subject to wish corruption.

 

[Perduabo]

Granted, but the genie decides then that that shall be your final wish.

I wish I had telekinesis

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but your only power would be to see what is up old ladies skirts

I wish for May to get here, so NEST can start

 

[slacker2114]

Granted, but you get hijacked by a busload of nuns on the way there who convert you into a life of chastity and seclusion.



I wish my job was more exciting.

 

[natural tickler]

granted, it now allows you to give a crack of a smile


i wish for some McDonald's

 

[Perduabo]

Granted. But that mayo you ordered on your chicken sandwich is actually pus from a tumor on the patty.

I wish for some Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but instead of cherries, an old man donated his bleeding testicles

I wish for some raspberry iced tea

 

[Perduabo]

Granted, but the tea has been strained through the bladder of a bubonic plague victim before it was served to you.

I wish for a good book to read.

 

[natural tickler]

granted, a book on how to masterbate effectively is being sent to you

I wish to have a kit kat bar


btw, at least the tea was strained, so its safe....LOL

 

[Perduabo]

Granted, a special one made from real cats.

I wish I had one extra dime

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but in celebrating your new discovery, a squirrel carjacks you for it


I wish for a strawberry pop tart

 

[Perduabo]

Granted, but it gets stuck in the toaster.

I wish I had a glass of orange juice.

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but upon drinking, an orange comes and squeezes the pulp out of you

i wish for a turkey sammich

 

[Perduabo]

Granted, but it is contaminated zombie turkey meat. Upon consumption, you become a gobbling turkey zombie yourself.

I wish for a vanilla latte

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but instead of vanilla flavoring, you have hydrochloric acid put in


I wish for some sleep, working these double shifts is murder

 

[sasaxrah]

You get some sleep, but you miss your next shift and oops, no more job.

I wish every weekend was 3 days long.

 

[Snail Shell]

Granted, but the days are now 16 hours long, so it's still 48 hours.

I wish I was in Ohio right now.

Snail Shell

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but soo as you enter, you travel at 2 mm per minute


I wish for NEST to come

 

[sasaxrah]

NEST came and went. You were sleeping that whole weekend.

I wish my job paid a little more.

 

[natural tickler]

granted, just add $.0005 cents to whatever you was making


I wish for some macaroni and cheese

 

[paracarl44]

Granted, the macaroni needs to be cooked, and the cheese is moldy.


I wish that it would not snow on Saturday night.

 

[DJ Tickler]

Granted. It snows Saturday morning and snows you in

I wish I wasnt so tired

DJ Tickler

 

[natural tickler]

granted, but you only have a five second burst of energy

I wish my throat wasn't hurting

 

[DJ Tickler]

Granted. It has surgically been removed. You must now eat and breath through a plastic tube.

I wish I wasnt so horney 😉

DJ Tickler