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DESPERATE HELP! NOW! PLEASE!

tupac92

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Joined
Sep 16, 2005
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HEY ALL, if any of use have read my posts .....ive got both a beautiful yet complicated situation on my hands.

Iv'e been seeing a girl for about 2 months now...and in that time i have tickled her alot....like alot ALOT!! however she doesn't no of my tickle fetish she just thinks im doing it to be playful and annoy her however she does no of my foot fetish and is open to that so im sure she will be open to the tickling one to...BUT THATS NOT THE PROBLEM!

you see if anybody had read my previous story....u would of heard of how ive been able to playfully also tickle my girls mother for some time...since ive written that story ive tickled both my mrs and her mother a couple more times....so i think to myself? do i try and kinky it up with the mrs and tell her tickling is actually a big fetish of mine? Or Not?
im scared she'll react and be all like "sooo, u tickle my mom?" hahaha i have no idea what to do and how it will go down...however if i don't say anything and keep just going the way things are going...i wont have to stop tickling her mum at all:D:D

im voting option to...just need some help from the TMF family?:)!
 
From my viewpoint you have placed yourself in a difficult situation.

Lets look at the facts.

Your get sexual pleasure from tickling.

You have tickled both your girlfriend and her mother and taken your pleasure in doing so.

So, if you reveal your fetish to the GF you are opening yourself to her thinking/saying; "So while you were tickling me mother were you getting off on it? EWWWWWW!" and the possible relationship ender bomb that hides in there.

Or you can keep your like silent. In which case you are being dishonest in your relationships sexual side, and also risk case one should the fact come out at some future point (Cut to 2014, gf finds out.. "Wait.... you used to tickle my mother! EWWWWWW!") leaving you to indulge with your GF secretly which sort of has it's own ick factor.

The sad thing is that she was open to your foot fetish, and probably would/will have been open to the tickling one. She sounds like she is open to such stuff. But by starting a sexual interaction with her mother you've sorta created a no win situation for yourself.

As always when tickling is sexual for a member, and they are wondering if some action they are taking is a good one with respect to it, I suggest writing it down and replacing "tickle" with "Fuck" and see if the idea is still good sounding.

lets see how it works here:

"I sometime like to tickle my girlfriends mother"

"I sometimes like to fuck my girlfriends mother"

Hmmmm. Seems a problem might pop up here regarding the GF's feelings on the topic.

*Note* I reserve this sort of exercise for folks who are clear that tickling is a sexual activity for them, as you have indicated. I feel it holds in your case. If tickling is not sexual for you, disregard what I've said.

Myriads
 
From my viewpoint you have placed yourself in a difficult situation.

Lets look at the facts.

Your get sexual pleasure from tickling.

You have tickled both your girlfriend and her mother and taken your pleasure in doing so.

So, if you reveal your fetish to the GF you are opening yourself to her thinking/saying; "So while you were tickling me mother were you getting off on it? EWWWWWW!" and the possible relationship ender bomb that hides in there.

Or you can keep your like silent. In which case you are being dishonest in your relationships sexual side, and also risk case one should the fact come out at some future point (Cut to 2014, gf finds out.. "Wait.... you used to tickle my mother! EWWWWWW!") leaving you to indulge with your GF secretly which sort of has it's own ick factor.

The sad thing is that she was open to your foot fetish, and probably would/will have been open to the tickling one. She sounds like she is open to such stuff. But by starting a sexual interaction with her mother you've sorta created a no win situation for yourself.

As always when tickling is sexual for a member, and they are wondering if some action they are taking is a good one with respect to it, I suggest writing it down and replacing "tickle" with "Fuck" and see if the idea is still good sounding.

lets see how it works here:

"I sometime like to tickle my girlfriends mother"

"I sometimes like to fuck my girlfriends mother"

Hmmmm. Seems a problem might pop up here regarding the GF's feelings on the topic.

*Note* I reserve this sort of exercise for folks who are clear that tickling is a sexual activity for them, as you have indicated. I feel it holds in your case. If tickling is not sexual for you, disregard what I've said.

Myriads


woah.....thanks mann that just opened my eyes!
 
Not many folks here can offer the type of insights Myriads can. Treasure it.

As for your situation. I don't believe that, in a committed relationship, you need to tell your partner explicitly what turns you on. It is something that will become understood. For example, you may start tickling her in bed. She will work out that you like tickling as part of the foreplay. She may ask one day, "does tickling turn you on?", then you may say, "only when I'm in bed with you".

That is the truth for me. I like my partner's boobs too. I also look at other girls' boobs. But it does not mean I want to engage sexually with all of them. With other girls it's a "view". With my partner it is sexual.

Good luck.
 
I really can't top Myriads' advice, so I'll just tell you what I think from my own point of view. Ultimately, I feel like you should come clean and tell your girlfriend that you have a tickle fetish. Yes, you run the risk of her reacting badly given that you've already tickled her mother multiple times and now you're admitting that it turns you on. But if you plan on staying with her, this is going to come up eventually. It's only fair that she knows so that she can make the choice of whether or not she'll let it bother her. And yeah, I am painfully aware that this could be a very uncomfortable conversation. Sorry. I wish I could offer up a better idea, but good luck nonetheless.
 
There is not much to add to Myriads' advice.

But I don't know...even though my husband doesn't have a tickling fetish, it would still be totally weird if he tickled my mother. Just doesn't seem appropriate.
 
What you do, my friend Tupac, is very simple. You continue to tickle the hell out of the old lady and you keep your BIG...MOUTH...SHUT! Thought Police to the contrary, you don't owe anyone an explanation as to your motives.

If your gf discovers, down the road, that you have a fetish in this area it doesn't mean it was being activated by your aging mother-in-law. The vast majority of people (including, most likely your gf, and even a few TMFers) enjoy tickling babies and little kids, in order to elicit reactions, without experiencing sexual desires.

The old lady is, more than likely, getting off on it or she would've put a stop to it long ago. So go ahead. Do good deed and make her day.
 
If your gf discovers, down the road, that you have a fetish in this area it doesn't mean it was being activated by your aging mother-in-law.

The question is, will she believe it? I doubt his mother-in-law is all that horrible, otherwise he probably wouldn't tickle her!
 
What you do, my friend Tupac, is very simple. You continue to tickle the hell out of the old lady and you keep your BIG...MOUTH...SHUT! Thought Police to the contrary, you don't owe anyone an explanation as to your motives.

If your gf discovers, down the road, that you have a fetish in this area it doesn't mean it was being activated by your aging mother-in-law. The vast majority of people (including, most likely your gf, and even a few TMFers) enjoy tickling babies and little kids, in order to elicit reactions, without experiencing sexual desires.

The old lady is, more than likely, getting off on it or she would've put a stop to it long ago. So go ahead. Do good deed and make her day.

Agreed. Carpe Diem.
 
The question is, will she believe it? I doubt his mother-in-law is all that horrible, otherwise he probably wouldn't tickle her!

The point is, he might. Tupac may view it as an act of charity or as a mildly amusing phenomenon. It wouldn't be unheard of. People are generally interested in exploring all aspects of things that they're interested in. It's what keeps fan magazines and conventions going. I'd check out an old lady's reactions out of idle curiosity if I knew she didn't mind.

But him divulging "Deep, Dark, Secrets", that he's ashamed about, to the family would result in him labelling himself a pervert and getting himself tossed out. And rightfully so--for Gross Stupidity.

They are all currently accepting his behavior. He's not out of line or he would have heard about it. The situation is in his hands to ruin.

---So Says: Sir Sea Spray Senior
 
From my viewpoint you have placed yourself in a difficult situation.

Lets look at the facts.

Your get sexual pleasure from tickling.

You have tickled both your girlfriend and her mother and taken your pleasure in doing so.

So, if you reveal your fetish to the GF you are opening yourself to her thinking/saying; "So while you were tickling me mother were you getting off on it? EWWWWWW!" and the possible relationship ender bomb that hides in there.

Or you can keep your like silent. In which case you are being dishonest in your relationships sexual side, and also risk case one should the fact come out at some future point (Cut to 2014, gf finds out.. "Wait.... you used to tickle my mother! EWWWWWW!") leaving you to indulge with your GF secretly which sort of has it's own ick factor.

The sad thing is that she was open to your foot fetish, and probably would/will have been open to the tickling one. She sounds like she is open to such stuff. But by starting a sexual interaction with her mother you've sorta created a no win situation for yourself.

As always when tickling is sexual for a member, and they are wondering if some action they are taking is a good one with respect to it, I suggest writing it down and replacing "tickle" with "Fuck" and see if the idea is still good sounding.

lets see how it works here:

"I sometime like to tickle my girlfriends mother"

"I sometimes like to fuck my girlfriends mother"

Hmmmm. Seems a problem might pop up here regarding the GF's feelings on the topic.

*Note* I reserve this sort of exercise for folks who are clear that tickling is a sexual activity for them, as you have indicated. I feel it holds in your case. If tickling is not sexual for you, disregard what I've said.

Myriads



Whoa! Myriads is smart.

Like Yoda smart.

Good advice man.
 
Depending on how you tickled her mother, you should just say that you can turn it off an on, maybe?

Like, you tickled her mother just purely for fun, while when you tickled her, you got crazy hot.

Or just go with Myriads advice.
 
Or you can keep your like silent. In which case you are being dishonest in your relationships sexual side...
Sorry to nitpick, but holding back information is not dishonesty. He's only being dishonest if she asks him about it and he denies it. There's no dishonesty in some healthy selectivity about what you reveal, even to your SO.

lets see how it works here:

"I sometime like to tickle my girlfriends mother"

"I sometimes like to fuck my girlfriends mother"
Apples and oranges. This is a common misconception among people in this forum. Tickling is not sex. Even for people with a tickle fetish, it isn't sex. You can't apply the same social astigmatisms to tickling just because a small handful of people get a thrill from it.
 
but holding back information is not dishonesty

Having to keep your fetish from your SO is pretty fucked up though. For yourself, not the SO!

Tickling is not sex.

It can be sexual though. So let's assume he gets horny if he tickles someone attractive, maybe it's not sex, but it's like grabbing boobs! I'm sure nobody would be thrilled about their SO grabbing their mom's boobs!
 
Sorry to nitpick, but holding back information is not dishonesty. He's only being dishonest if she asks him about it and he denies it. There's no dishonesty in some healthy selectivity about what you reveal, even to your SO.

Apples and oranges. This is a common misconception among people in this forum. Tickling is not sex. Even for people with a tickle fetish, it isn't sex. You can't apply the same social astigmatisms to tickling just because a small handful of people get a thrill from it.


Since we are picking nits I'll clarify. By saying ''dishonest' I mean the following; Being dishonest is not lying. It's a lighter shade of that act, thus my use of the word dishonest, and not lie. Dishonestly is misdirection, omission, or allowing false assumptions to stand. I chose the word because of it's specific meaning. It was the exact right tool for the specific job that needed doing here.

Introduction of dishonestly into a sexual interaction cheats both partners, as one is being deprived of the knowledge they might use to provide a better experience to their partner and in turn form a closer connection to them with, and the other is acting on motives that they are hiding, and in turn this makes it much harder for them to find full enjoyment in the actions. It also seeds the poison for future problems when the dishonesty is dispelled, or when true lies are used to maintain it. It's a tiny bit of mold on a relationship that can spread.

That is what I meant.

In reply to the second paragraph, your outlook is just as easily classed as the myopia that non-sexual ticklers hold regarding all tickling activities. It's one of the basic divisions in this community and one of the roots of some of the troubles we have.

For those new to this topic I'll recap.

There are two basic groups of tickling fans.

I'll call them Playful ticklers, and Sexual ticklers.

Playful tickers see tickling as a basic fun activity that builds social connectivity, and provides a positive feeling of release and play. At most it's foreplay, and not a sexual act in and of itself.

Sexual ticklers are aroused by tickling on the sexual level. It's a direct stimuli response equation that turns them on. Whenever they encounter ticking, their first response is sexual, and not chosen. They can of course stop that response with thought, and deal with situations as needed properly, but that is an effort that requires a mindful moment.

The problem that the community often faces is that both of these groups have no understanding of the others outlook and how set it is, and what it causes for its holder.

The sexual ticklers see the playfulls talking about tickling their kids, and blood relatives and get a horrified incest/child porn gut response. The playfulls fail to get that for the sexuals there is always that arousal aspect connected to the act first every time that cannot be passed by easily. They end up confusing and disgusting each other and fight.

Morning Lorie is coming from the playful side of the equation. My advice comes from the sexual, and take note that I qualified my advice at the end of my post with that very fact to prevent a misunderstanding exactly like Mornings from happening.

For sexual ticklers the tickle/fuck interchange is 100% on target. Why? Because for the sexual ticklers tickling IS a sex act. And bears all the weight and meaning that other sex acts have.

Here let me make a translation into the 'standard' sexual lexicon.

In a base sexuality, a male seeing a nude female is considered a sexualized action. Nudity is linked to male arousal. So situations where a male views a nude female take on sexual elements.

So our society develops traditions that take this into account.

A man has a 16 year old daughter. She's taking a shower. Is it proper for dad to walk into the bathroom and have a chat with her? To enter her bedroom while she is changing? For most people the answer is a gut based no. And that answer is based on an understanding of how that viewing is a sexual activity for the 'average' psychology, and thus crosses lines of appropriate father/daughter interaction.

Same deal with tickling, and sexual ticklers. The act is directly connected to their sexuality. It cannot be easily separated from it. So a comparison where a sex act is flipped in for tickling works.

This DOES NOT hold for playfulls.

Nor does it hold for someone with no connection to tickling at all (lets call them vanillas) But one thing Vanilla's DO understand is this; when they encounter a sexual (tickler or some other fetish) they tend to get on the gut level that the act is sexual for their partner. And they quickly place their partners actions in that sexual context. ALL their partners actions (Hey! You tickled my mom... a lot! HEY! you were always tickling my girlfriends when they visited. HEY!!!!! you tickled my little sister!) and make conclusions based on that.

Are women disgusted by a foot fetishist in general? Nope.

But tell them that guy working in the shoe store is a foot fetishist and see how fast the disgust-o-meter pops into the red. This is an example of how Vanilla's look at sexual fetish. The dishonesty inherent in getting ones jollies from unaware subjects sets off the disgust response. All based on how sexuality is understood (or misunderstood)

The OP made it pretty clear in his post that he gets off on tickling in a sexual way. So I felt comfortable classing him as a sexual tickler, and using the tickle/fuck tool to show an easy way to get a quick read on how a vanilla might well view his actions. I'll stand by it.

If he's a playful tickler then he has no problem. But I don't think he's of that group like Morning Lorrie is.

Myriads
 
Myriads, I would say that this was the best post I have ever read on this forum!
 
Since we are picking nits I'll clarify. By saying ''dishonest' I mean the following; Being dishonest is not lying. It's a lighter shade of that act, thus my use of the word dishonest, and not lie. Dishonestly is misdirection, omission, or allowing false assumptions to stand. I chose the word because of it's specific meaning. It was the exact right tool for the specific job that needed doing here.

Introduction of dishonestly into a sexual interaction cheats both partners, as one is being deprived of the knowledge they might use to provide a better experience to their partner and in turn form a closer connection to them with, and the other is acting on motives that they are hiding, and in turn this makes it much harder for them to find full enjoyment in the actions. It also seeds the poison for future problems when the dishonesty is dispelled, or when true lies are used to maintain it. It's a tiny bit of mold on a relationship that can spread.

That is what I meant.

In reply to the second paragraph, your outlook is just as easily classed as the myopia that non-sexual ticklers hold regarding all tickling activities. It's one of the basic divisions in this community and one of the roots of some of the troubles we have.

For those new to this topic I'll recap.

There are two basic groups of tickling fans.

I'll call them Playful ticklers, and Sexual ticklers.

Playful tickers see tickling as a basic fun activity that builds social connectivity, and provides a positive feeling of release and play. At most it's foreplay, and not a sexual act in and of itself.

Sexual ticklers are aroused by tickling on the sexual level. It's a direct stimuli response equation that turns them on. Whenever they encounter ticking, their first response is sexual, and not chosen. They can of course stop that response with thought, and deal with situations as needed properly, but that is an effort that requires a mindful moment.

The problem that the community often faces is that both of these groups have no understanding of the others outlook and how set it is, and what it causes for its holder.

The sexual ticklers see the playfulls talking about tickling their kids, and blood relatives and get a horrified incest/child porn gut response. The playfulls fail to get that for the sexuals there is always that arousal aspect connected to the act first every time that cannot be passed by easily. They end up confusing and disgusting each other and fight.

Morning Lorie is coming from the playful side of the equation. My advice comes from the sexual, and take note that I qualified my advice at the end of my post with that very fact to prevent a misunderstanding exactly like Mornings from happening.

For sexual ticklers the tickle/fuck interchange is 100% on target. Why? Because for the sexual ticklers tickling IS a sex act. And bears all the weight and meaning that other sex acts have.

Here let me make a translation into the 'standard' sexual lexicon.

In a base sexuality, a male seeing a nude female is considered a sexualized action. Nudity is linked to male arousal. So situations where a male views a nude female take on sexual elements.

So our society develops traditions that take this into account.

A man has a 16 year old daughter. She's taking a shower. Is it proper for dad to walk into the bathroom and have a chat with her? To enter her bedroom while she is changing? For most people the answer is a gut based no. And that answer is based on an understanding of how that viewing is a sexual activity for the 'average' psychology, and thus crosses lines of appropriate father/daughter interaction.

Same deal with tickling, and sexual ticklers. The act is directly connected to their sexuality. It cannot be easily separated from it. So a comparison where a sex act is flipped in for tickling works.

This DOES NOT hold for playfulls.

Nor does it hold for someone with no connection to tickling at all (lets call them vanillas) But one thing Vanilla's DO understand is this; when they encounter a sexual (tickler or some other fetish) they tend to get on the gut level that the act is sexual for their partner. And they quickly place their partners actions in that sexual context. ALL their partners actions (Hey! You tickled my mom... a lot! HEY! you were always tickling my girlfriends when they visited. HEY!!!!! you tickled my little sister!) and make conclusions based on that.

Are women disgusted by a foot fetishist in general? Nope.

But tell them that guy working in the shoe store is a foot fetishist and see how fast the disgust-o-meter pops into the red. This is an example of how Vanilla's look at sexual fetish. The dishonesty inherent in getting ones jollies from unaware subjects sets off the disgust response. All based on how sexuality is understood (or misunderstood)

The OP made it pretty clear in his post that he gets off on tickling in a sexual way. So I felt comfortable classing him as a sexual tickler, and using the tickle/fuck tool to show an easy way to get a quick read on how a vanilla might well view his actions. I'll stand by it.

If he's a playful tickler then he has no problem. But I don't think he's of that group like Morning Lorrie is.

Myriads

very very vry true x 1000

you see for me tickling would be abit of both that you just classified....it does turn me on but i don't always intend for it to lead to sex.

but thanks for your advice you were a great help!
 
out of line?
the womens 40 not 103.

And her age has exactly WHAT to do with you being out of line if you get a hard-on from tickling her? Okay, I admit, if she was 103 you would be even more creepy, but apart from that, using your mother-in-law for getting your jollies is TOTALLY OUT OF LINE, no matter how old she may be!
 
And her age has exactly WHAT to do with you being out of line if you get a hard-on from tickling her? Okay, I admit, if she was 103 you would be even more creepy, but apart from that, using your mother-in-law for getting your jollies is TOTALLY OUT OF LINE, no matter how old she may be!

i dont think you will find one guy on this forum who'd pass up the opportunity to tickle both there gf and there mother!!
 
i dont think you will find one guy on this forum who'd pass up the opportunity to tickle both there gf and there mother!!

I think the great majority on here would be glad if they even had the opportunity to tickle their gf and they wouldn't dream of risking to lose that just because they can't get their hands on enough females!

Is it really so hard to sometimes use the brain instead of the schlong for thinking?
 
One should keep in mind that sexual and playful ticklers are not mutually exclusive. Human behavior does not usually fall into conveniant categories. I've tickled rats (who do laugh, by the way) and I've yet to want to fuck one. The same holds true for babies and old ladies.

I don't know if the mother-in-law turns Tupac on but what if she didn't. Should he deny an aspect of his Interactive Personality fearing boogey-men scenarios that may not materialize. That's like telling a mother not to tickle her kids because Chester the Molester gets turned on by it. Such advocates are projecting their own guilt trip onto others.

If, down the road, the gf has unwarranted fears about his behavior, he can explain himself and, regardless of whether he feels she's justified, tone it down. Such give and take are expected in a healthy relationship. Twisting oneself into a pretzel in anticipation of non-existant scenarios is misdirected guilt, pure and simple.

---So Says: Sir Sea Spray Senior
 
One should keep in mind that sexual and playful ticklers are not mutually exclusive. Human behavior does not usually fall into conveniant categories. I've tickled rats (who do laugh, by the way) and I've yet to want to fuck one. The same holds true for babies and old ladies.

I don't know if the mother-in-law turns Tupac on but what if she didn't. Should he deny an aspect of his Interactive Personality fearing boogey-men scenarios that may not materialize. That's like telling a mother not to tickle her kids because Chester the Molester gets turned on by it. Such advocates are projecting their own guilt trip onto others.

If, down the road, the gf has unwarranted fears about his behavior, he can explain himself and, regardless of whether he feels she's justified, tone it down. Such give and take are expected in a healthy relationship. Twisting oneself into a pretzel in anticipation of non-existant scenarios is misdirected guilt, pure and simple.

---So Says: Sir Sea Spray Senior
ofcourse tickling her mother turns me on.....im on this page becausei have a tickle fetish lol....but it doesnt mean i wana fuck her....i do it purely for my love and the fun of it...and the fact that its playful and fun to do!
 
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