drew70's guide to successful TMF posting

[chicago]

Finding yourself unpopular? Ignored? Shunned, even? Well now you can put all that behind you! Just follow these 10 simple principles and you'll be emptying out your PM box on a weekly basis!

Grammar and spelling – We all make typos from time to time, but at least make the effort to keep your posts looking clean and smart. Proper capitalization and punctuation are musts. It’s also important to split your post up into paragraphs complete with a topic sentence. I guarantee more people will read them and feel inclined to respond.

Be specific in your thread titles – Few things are more irritating than non-specific thread titles like "I was wondering...." or "Need help! Please read!" Your title should summarize what the thread is about. If the new thread is a question, then boil that question down to it's basic, and ask it in the title. Use the body of the post to expand on the details. And Guys? Whatever you do, NEVER start a thread titled, "Question for the ladies..." You might as well stand in a crowd and shout “I NEED SOME FEMALE ATTENTION, PLEEEEASE!” You might be thinking, “Hey, I just want to get the female perspective,” but trust me, it sends a message of desperate losership like wearing a baseball cap backwards.

Never bump a buried thread, especially one you yourself started – This is especially obnoxious when you bump the thread by posting only the word “bump” perhaps follwing it with the bump smilie. Used car salesmen wearing bright plaid sportcoats are less tacky. Chrisheaven, I really hope you’re reading this.

Avoid chatroom-type abbreviations – LOL, ROFL, and LMAO are pretty universal and well established. They come across okay in a thread, but anything beyond those are just exercises in laziness. Reserve FWIW, IDK, and AFAIK for live chat, where the time it takes to type actually matters.

Avoid broken java codes – Unless you want everybody to know you just browsed into the TMF from Yahoo Teen Chat, don’t embarrass yourself with bogus attempts at ASCII smilies like XD or ^_^. The TMF has a more-than-adequate supply of working smilies without resorting to that silly shit.

Never respond to a thread with just a smilie or LOL – This really shows a profound lack of imagination as well as apathetic indifference. If you don’t have anything better to say, don’t bother responding.

Never report a post to a moderator, unless it’s spam advertising – We’re all adults here. If you find yourself involved in a conflict, exercise a little personal fortitude and try to resolve it yourself. If you’re not so inclined, simply walk away from it. This practice of whining to the moderators that Tickler Joe was mean to me is a little too Romper Room for an adult forum, when you think about it.

Avoid lame attempts to look cool with inappropriate plurality – I don’t know where this dumbass trend started but it has got to go. I’m talking about phrases like “Oh noes!” or “Hellz no!” This is the epitome of loserspeak. It sends the message of idiocy as clearly as wearing a baseball cap backwards.

When responding to clips, talk about the actual content, not alternative scenes you’d like to see – This kind of shit gets really old. “This would be better if she were wearing nylons.” Well, she wasn’t wearing nylons, so quit your bitching and deal with it. And in most F/M clip posts, its almost inevitible that some douchebag will ask if the guy gets “revenge.” The answer is no, he doesn’t. He tries, but he’s easily overpowered by the woman who publically humiliates him and tickles him even more vigorously.

Never announce that you are ignoring somebody – It can’t be stressed enough. This is probably the single most immature act one can perform in an online forum. If you want to ignore somebody, just do it. You may think it’s a burn on the guy you’re ignoring to make such an announcement but it isn’t. It only makes you look petulent and socially inept, especially if it comes on the heels of a heated discussion. It’s the virtual equivalent of putting your hands over your ears and singling loudly, “LA LA LA LA. I CAN’T HEAR YOUUUU!!”

lol! gud 1 dru. Ill fur sur keep dis in mindz yo!!!!11111one

 

[Redmage]

My formula for successful posting is much simpler.

1) Click "New Thread," "Quote," or "Post Reply" as appropriate.

2) Type something. Ideally, make it legible.

3) Click "Submit."

4) Bask in the warm glow of a successful post.

 

[LindyHopper]

My formula for successful posting is much simpler.

1) Click "New Thread," "Quote," or "Post Reply" as appropriate.

2) Type something. Ideally, make it legible.

3) Click "Submit."

4) Bask in the warm glow of a successful post.

You know, your strategy has worked surprisingly badly for me lately! Database errors all over the place.

Oh, and as long as hijacking wasn't on the list of no-nos..... thanks for using that couch tie on me again last weekend. I've missed it.

 

[LindyHopper]

There is absolutely no guarantee that posting within these guidelines will make a poster a more noticed or popular person here. I fit very nicely within these guidelines and my posts are not commented on most of the time and my PM box is not even close to full....and I am a woman....So that blows that theory. The only time my PM box got a lot of attention was when I brought some sexual content into a post.

Well, you don't make a big deal about being a woman (which I think is very cool, FWIW). If we define "successful" posting as what gets a lot of attention, there's a pretty reliable formula for that around here, and it has nothing to do with proper spelling and specific thread titles (unless the thread title is "New Girl - Very Ticklish!"). 😉

Don't worry tickles..tis just Drew70's view of a more perfect forum...

It appears to me that "successful" in the OP is defined as what would make the TMF more hospitable for drew70 - a world where he doesn't have to put up with people's bad spelling, or lolspeak, or requests for M/F, where his flames go unmoderated, where he doesn't have to hear that somebody isn't paying attention to him. 🙄 Never mind that it might make the forum less friendly for young people, or people with learning disabilities, or everyone he wants to flame. That's just not part of the equation.

It almost makes me want to start spelling stuff wrong just to piss him off. Almost. 😛

 

[minerva]

Interesting in what way, I wonder? I mean, surely there's a big difference between imposing forced compliance under threat and promoting suggested guidelines for successful posting. While I do feel that people should should be free to express themselves any way they want, even if that way is rude and obnoxious; that doesn't mean I'm going to recommend them to do so. Similarly, while I recommend these particular guidelines for successful posting, I would never want them to be enforced as rigid requirements, subject to disciplinary action upon failure to comply.

Do you see the difference?

Well, while constant spelling and grammar mistakes, leetspeak, misleading thread titles, unneccessary bumping, ... might be a bit annoying to SOME, all these things don't really hurt anyone.
People who start flame wars, attack and insult others do hurt though. They don't only hurt the person they attack, but as some people already mentioned, they might get otherwise interesting threads completely deleted.

I was just wondering about your priorities a bit 😉

 

[venray]

My formula for successful posting is much simpler.

1) Click "New Thread," "Quote," or "Post Reply" as appropriate.

2) Type something. Ideally, make it legible.

3) Click "Submit."

4) Bask in the warm glow of a successful post.

Funny, I have been using that system since the inception of this forum and find it most satisfying....

I too hate a post filled with spelling errors and abbreviations, but merely skip by them to avoid hurting my feeble old brain.......

I REALLY hate those that put little dots at the end of each thought as if there is more to follow.....

 

[Redmage]

You know, your strategy has worked surprisingly badly for me lately! Database errors all over the place.

Hey, it's not my fault if the system can't handle elegant methods.

Oh, and as long as hijacking wasn't on the list of no-nos..... thanks for using that couch tie on me again last weekend. I've missed it.

Yeah, me too. But I'll stop hijacking now.

 

[drew70]

Well, while constant spelling and grammar mistakes, leetspeak, misleading thread titles, unneccessary bumping, ... might be a bit annoying to SOME, all these things don't really hurt anyone.
People who start flame wars, attack and insult others do hurt though. They don't only hurt the person they attack, but as some people already mentioned, they might get otherwise interesting threads completely deleted.

I was just wondering about your priorities a bit 😉

Why, I'd be more than happy to elaborate on them, my dear.

The TMF already has rules in place that forbid attacking, flaming, insulting, all these things that you say actually hurt people. (Sorry, I don't agree, but we can shelve that discussion if you like). If this were an open forum, I would have included recommendations on how to act and react to other posters, but all that is already covered by the Golden Rule and it's ancillary decrees.

Subsequently, my "priorities" in promoting these principles for successful posting were mostly focused on being less obnoxious and irritating to the masses, thereby achieving a greater audience. I've seen several people admit that they will just skip over badly written posts, or ones filled with ASCII inanities because they are too tedious to wallow through. Others see that stuff and immediately disregard any poster capable of such drivel as having any valid or legitimate input. They are (perhaps unfairly, perhaps not) dismissed as dolts, idiots and morons.

My principles are designed to radically improve the quality of such posts so that the interesting thoughts and ideas buried in them will be better communicated and more widely received en masse.

Hence, everybody benefits. 🙂

 

[chicago]

What was that about being less obnoxious and irritating?

 

[venray]

roflmao

 

[steph]

Funny and pretty right on Drew!

I'll just address the ones I felt the need to comment on...the rest I don't have any opinion on at all...

Grammar and spelling –
That's a good tip, I like it. I do tend to be typing on the fly a lot though, in between appointments, running out the door, etc. And you've seen how long my nails are--sometimes they get stuck in between keys!

Never bump a buried thread, especially one you yourself started – OMG, thank you for this~absolutely pathetic (except for the part about Chris, because I like him and I don't spend enough time over in "silly" to ever get annoyed by him.)

Avoid chatroom-type abbreviations –
Ya, again, I sometimes find myself guilty of this. I do it mostly in the interest of time. But, when most of the post is written like that, I agree, it really sucks. People who do this should just preface the post with "HEY LOOK AT ME, I'M 16 YEARS OLD AND A JACKASS!" Then again, don't bother, we've already figured it out.

Never respond to a thread with just a smilie or LOL –
We talked about this one on the phone~much of the time, it's just my way of acknowledging that person's response, I'm saying to them, "thank you. I heard ya, and we'll discuss it more when I have more time to talk about it.

Never report a post to a moderator, unless it’s spam advertising – Well, we SHOULD all be adults here, but, we all know this is definitely NOT the reality. I think I mostly report when someone's been horrendously out of line, or unusually offensive to someone I care about. I think my last report was about a minor who had posted. But, the incessant whining and/or reporting when you don't get your way and can't scream loud enough to change other people's minds just wastes the mods' time. Cut it out and grow up. Your argument, no matter how absurdly long winded, failed to convince. Move on to something else.

XOXO

 

[drew70]

What was that about being less obnoxious and irritating?

Only that perhaps more of us need to practice at it than I first thought. 😀

But, the incessant whining and/or reporting when you don't get your way and can't scream loud enough to change other people's minds just wastes the mods' time. Cut it out and grow up. Your argument, no matter how absurdly long winded, failed to convince. Move on to something else.

Beautifully stated. This is a good example of being less irritating and obnoxious.

 

[Leo tickles]

Sugar coat EVERYTHING. Add that one in. Shit.


Um. Make... everything... be.... happy.... see, I suck at this sugar coating thing. Oh well, back to the preview clips section. I really am thinking about joining that ticklishspots.com site.........

 

[Bohemianne]

C'mon Drew, spare me the exploited use of the 21st century schizoid acronyms: LOL and LMAO . I'll never live the information age without them. 😱

Other than that, your lists are civil and agreeable.

 

[drew70]

C'mon Drew, spare me the exploited use of the 21st century schizoid acronyms: LOL and LMAO . I'll never live the information age without them. 😱

Other than that, your lists are civil and agreeable.

Thank you. Actually there's a couple of reasons I flagged those two in particular as okay for forum use while recommending reserving the others for chatrooms.

The first reason is that those two are actually left over from the 20th century. From my experience they are the earliest and best established acronyms in use on the Internet, along with BRB.

The second reason is that without them, it's difficult to convey our laughing reactions to posts. I've tried things like "haha" but that sometimes come off as unintentionally sarcastic, as in "Ha ha, very funny." In real life, whether in person or on the phone, we laugh, and our reaction is successfully communicated to the other. In this text environment in which there is no audio or video, we need something to let the others know we're laughing.

But if it meant never again seeing in a forum IDK, FWIW, AFAIK, IAWTS, and a host of other acronyms born of laziness, then I'd give up LOL and LMAO in a heartbeat.

 

[nerobob]

A fine guide, Drew. I see good grammar and punctuation as simple courtesy, nothing will cause me to skip a post more quickly than seeing a mass of unbroken text. Using paragraphs isn't rocket science, kids.

 

[drew70]

As you frequently do, you seem to be skirting right along the edge of GR violations, trying to imply that I'm immature, or a loser/whiner/crybaby, but coming just short of saying it outright, because you know that to do so would be a violation.

My apologies. I didn't mean "you" in the personal sense but rather in the general. I should have better worded it by saying, "...one really must handle things in a more mature fashion or suffer the fate of being shunned as a loser/whiner/crybaby." While this principle certainly does apply to you personally, it doesn't apply to you exclusively. It also applies to me and to everybody else who wants to be a successful poster.

In any case, I've learned from several past experiences the most important reason for reporting posts to the mods. More than once, a thread that I was passionately involved in got deleted in its entirety due to a flamewar that got out of hand. In a subsequent thread about the nuking, the mods explicitly said that they way to prevent threads from getting nuked is to report a probable violation as soon as it occurs.

I suppose that is one way. However, I can think of a much better plan to preempt the "nuking" of threads in their entirety. Simply disable that feature. Voila. This will insure that everybody gets a fair shake, and that nobody will have their legitimate comments silenced simply because it was more convenient to delete the entire thread.

All things considered, the mods have a very light touch.

Is the deleting of entire threads really your idea of a "light touch"? Ask anybody who's been banned if they think they were lightly touched.

I would hardly call them Big Brother. The overwhelming majority of posts are still around exactly as they were posted.

Just because the number of intrusions is comparitively low to the vast number of posts in general, that doesn't make the threat is any less present. It's the threat itself that more than justifies the term Big Brother. A successful poster realizes that threat is always there, and posts accordingly.

I take issue with your forumulation. A successful poster will not provoke moderator intervention by maintaining peaceful continuity of the thread in a mature and adult fashion. He will not intentionally provoke, or obliquely insult others, purely for his own amusement.

Perhaps not purely for his own amusement, but what about for the amusement of numerous others. There are many ways to insult people. A successful poster would not resort to overt insults, name-calling, fuck-yous, etc., since those tactics clearly violate established protocol. Instead, he/she will respond more subtly keeping within the posted regulations. For example, we're permitted to attack comments and ideas, just not those who submit them. However, if it happens that the originator of the attacked comments feels insulted by association?...Oh well.

Whether someone reports to the mods or not is completely irrelevant to how he is perceived on the forum, because reporting to the mods is private. No readers or other participants in the thread will have any idea who (if anybody) reported a violation unless the mods themselves reveal that information.

Trust me. There are ways of finding out. Like any organization, the TMF has an extensive grapevine. Don't underestimate it. Anybody who makes a practice of tattling regularly gets a reputation for doing so. One key to success is to avoid such a reputation at all cost.

 

[Icycle]

I suppose that is one way. However, I can think of a much better plan to preempt the "nuking" of threads in their entirety. Simply disable that feature. Voila. This will insure that everybody gets a fair shake, and that nobody will have their legitimate comments silenced simply because it was more convenient to delete the entire thread.

You may wish this forum operated in a different fashion. And you are even welcome to lobby the moderators for the changes you desire, though I seriously doubt you'd get very far. But in the current system, threads can and do get deleted in their entirety. Therefore, a successful poster who want his posts to get read has a responsibility to promptly report violations to the moderators in threads he has contributed to.

Is the deleting of entire threads really your idea of a "light touch"?

Of course not, but that happens quite rarely, and in extreme circumstances. And it can be avoided almost entirely if thread participants report flagrant violations before they erupt into full-fledged flamewars.

Ask anybody who's been banned if they think they were lightly touched.

Frankly, in the cases I'm aware of (the grapevine works both ways), the person who was banned was behaving as a flame-baiting troll. The TMF became a much nicer place after the ban.

Just because the number of intrusions is comparitively low to the vast number of posts in general, that doesn't make the threat is any less present. It's the threat itself that more than justifies the term Big Brother. A successful poster realizes that threat is always there, and posts accordingly.

I would argue that a successful poster ought not try to be a rules lawyer who walks a fine line just short of committing GR violations. That just annoys the mods and everyone else, and leads to occasional actual violations when one slips.

I would instead suggest that a successful poster treats everyone with respect and civility, as if you were at a dinner party. It makes the TMF a much nicer place for everyone, and you have no worry of being punished by the mods.

I personally do not chafe under the "oppression" of the mods as some apparently do, because I operate well within the rules by choice. In fact I post no differently than I would without moderators. And in all my time here, I've never been banned, never even been warned by the mods. And the only posts have had deleted were parts of entire threads that were deleted.

Perhaps not purely for his own amusement, but what about for the amusement of numerous others.

Perhaps there are some that are amused, but I suspect that most people are simply annoyed by flame-baiting trolls. Being genuinely civil seems more likely to garner respect amongst one's readers, and therefore, lead to greater success.

There are many ways to insult people. A successful poster would not resort to overt insults, name-calling, fuck-yous, etc., since those tactics clearly violate established protocol. Instead, he/she will respond more subtly keeping within the posted regulations. For example, we're permitted to attack comments and ideas, just not those who submit them. However, if it happens that the originator of the attacked comments feels insulted by association?...Oh well.

So you advocate covert insults, insinuations, innuendo, and rules lawyering? I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

Trust me. There are ways of finding out. Like any organization, the TMF has an extensive grapevine. Don't underestimate it. Anybody who makes a practice of tattling regularly gets a reputation for doing so. One key to success is to avoid such a reputation at all cost.

Perhaps the poster who was reported to the mods finds out, and maybe he tells his clique of cronies. But most people reading and participating in a thread have no idea who, if anybody, is reporting posts to the mods. So any reputation would be limited to a tiny number of people. And based on the responses in this thread, it seems like most people would consider someone reporting violations to the mods to be a responsible, upstanding member of the community.

On the other hand, it is very easy to gain a reputation as a rules-lawyering, flame-baiting troll, because one's posts are in public view... and this reputation can be a problem. It causes the mods to watch such a person more closely, and be less tolerant of any transgressions. It causes other readers to not engage, or even put the individual on Ignore, whether they announce they are doing so or not. As a soft spoken friend of mine once said, "I take active pleasure in not reading what he posts." It seems to me that such a reputation would be far more damaging to one's posting "success" on the TMF than a reputation for being helpful and constructive.

 

[drew70]

You may wish this forum operated in a different fashion. And you are even welcome to lobby the moderators for the changes you desire, though I seriously doubt you'd get very far. But in the current system, threads can and do get deleted in their entirety. Therefore, a successful poster who want his posts to get read has a responsibility to promptly report violations to the moderators in threads he has contributed to.

It has nothing to do with what I personally wish, Icycle. I'm talking about realistic, mature alternatives to tattling, pointing fingers, and whining. You speak as if the current system is something we're stuck with and can't change, and so you advocate we all become sheep and just go along with it and not question it. I assure you it can change and it will change when people begin to decide they prefer to be treated like adults and not children. We have a responsibility to speak out against such things and not simply bury our heads in the sand. If you want to be a successful poster, you must know when to speak the words that need to be spoken, even if it risks upsetting the status quo.

Of course not, but [the deleting of entire threads] happens quite rarely, and in extreme circumstances. And it can be avoided almost entirely if thread participants report flagrant violations before they erupt into full-fledged flamewars.

Quite rarely? Dude, if it happens at all, it happens entirely too often. Nothing justifies such gross abuses of power. We're talking about not only deleting posts that violate the rules, but deleting non-offending posts along with them. And you're okay with that? You're willing to swallow the party line that it's what we deserve for not tattling soon enough?

By the way, just so you know, a single violation does not "erupt into full-fledged flamewars." Ever. Multiple violations concentrated in a single thread are simply that. Each one took a conscious decision from the poster to break the rules. It's not like people read the violation and go, "Uh oh...oh shit....I can't stop myself....here I goooooo..."

I would argue that a successful poster ought not try to be a rules lawyer who walks a fine line just short of committing GR violations. That just annoys the mods and everyone else, and leads to occasional actual violations when one slips.

What exactly do you mean by "rules lawyer"? Are you saying its wrong to take the trouble to learn the TMF rules and make an effort to operate within them? What is wrong with falling short of a GR violation? Shouldn't that be everybody's goal here?

I would instead suggest that a successful poster treats everyone with respect and civility, as if you were at a dinner party. It makes the TMF a much nicer place for everyone, and you have no worry of being punished by the mods.

Except that according to you, somewhere down the thread a "flamewar" might "erupt" from a single violation, which according to your previous statements, justifies the mods punishing you for it. That seems like cause for concern to me.

In addition, while some might prefer the stuffy "dinner party" atmosphere, others may prefer a more casual one. I think you may be a tad presumtuous in speaking for "everyone."

I personally do not chafe under the "oppression" of the mods as some apparently do, because I operate well within the rules by choice. In fact I post no differently than I would without moderators. And in all my time here, I've never been banned, never even been warned by the mods. And the only posts have had deleted were parts of entire threads that were deleted.

So then, you have been oppressed, by your own admission. You just choose to bend over and take it rather than stand up and challenge it.

Perhaps there are some that are amused, but I suspect that most people are simply annoyed by flame-baiting trolls. Being genuinely civil seems more likely to garner respect amongst one's readers, and therefore, lead to greater success.

It's all about timing, Icycle. Most of the time being civil is the best way, I'll agree. It should be everybody's default mode of operation. However, there are times when harsher words are called for. Knowing when those times are, and acting accordingly, will gain one more respect than being known as somebody who is afraid to say what needs to be said for fear of punishment; who tattles rather than deals; who blindly sucks up to the administration regardless of the abuses of power, etc.

So you advocate covert insults, insinuations, innuendo, and rules lawyering? I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

Nor should you be offended, since you too have also engaged in most, if not all of these practices, regardless of whether you advocate them or not. At least you've got some potential for success.

Perhaps the poster who was reported to the mods finds out, and maybe he tells his clique of cronies. But most people reading and participating in a thread have no idea who, if anybody, is reporting posts to the mods. So any reputation would be limited to a tiny number of people.

There you go, underestimating the gravevine. Well if it helps you to hold your head up high, you're free to go right on believing that, but it won't change anything. Besides, when you publically proclaim advocation of this practice, you might as well wear a T-shirt that says, "Tattler." The grapevine information has now become public knowledge. I would definitely have to file this under "unsuccessful posting."

And based on the responses in this thread, it seems like most people would consider someone reporting violations to the mods to be a responsible, upstanding member of the community.

You're basing your assumptions on the responses of a minute few individuals. Not a very good research practice, I must say.

On the other hand, it is very easy to gain a reputation as a rules-lawyering, flame-baiting troll, because one's posts are in public view... and this reputation can be a problem.

Holy shit. Did you actually say "rules lawyering"?? Now there's a good example of non-successful posting. Newsflash: Lawyers don't lawyer. They practice law.

It causes other readers to not engage, or even put the individual on Ignore, whether they announce they are doing so or not. As a soft spoken friend of mine once said, "I take active pleasure in not reading what he posts."

As petty as that may sound, there's some real wisdom there. Your silver-tongued friend is being selective in what she reads, and that's what we all need to do. Come across somebody who's opinons and comments rub you the wrong way? Instead of running to the mods and crying like spoiled children, simply take active pleasure in not reading what they post.

It seems to me that such a reputation would be far more damaging to one's posting "success" on the TMF than a reputation for being helpful and constructive.

Some of us have both. If the negative reputation is largely propogated by the egotistical would-be elitists, having been frustrated and humiliated time and again at their failed attempts at opinion subjugation; well, that can actually add to a person's success, as I can tell you from personal experience. 😀

 

[subZer0]

i cn only agrea wiv the orijinel poster . gramer is a must and punchuashen . and propper sentanse construcsion. and not to meny 'and' 's .


i rool