Gezz...get called away on a mission and I miss everything!
As far as the "one with the Force" thing surrounding the concept of Jedi ghosts and such...
You can't look at it too literally. Obi-Wan appearing to Luke isn't so much a learned ability as it is Obi-Wan's destiny in the Force. (This is what is meant by "If you strike me down, I'll become more powerful...") The New Jedi Order explains so much more of this that you can't really get it from the films. Kenobi and Yoda are
far from being the only ones who've done it, although they are the only ones in the films. The whole "body dematerializing" mystery should be somewhat alluded to to in Revenge of the Sith. Some do, some don't. The #1 rule of the Force is that there are no rules. The bottom line is, who knows what Ben spent his time on Tatooine doing. There's a lot more to being a Jedi than whipping out the blade and taking names. It is likely that his place in the Force was cemented in those years, and he came to fully understand it. You can't think of "using the Force" as a strictly learned ability. The Force is (for lack of a better word) an entity in and of itself. When Jacen Solo became a true Force beacon, it wasn't an ability he learned, it was a complete and total surrender to the Force, while the Force itself defeated (left blank for those who haven't read it yet). If Jedi spend there entire lives trying to understand the Force, you can't explain it all here.
In NJO, Jedi come to realize that truly becoming One with the Force is an act of pure symbiosis, of allowing the Force to do what it needs to through a living being. Following the will of the Force, if you will.
As far as the debate about Aurabesh...it's called Basic for a reason. During the early development of the Republic, when worlds were first coming together through hyperspace travel, it was realized that so many divergent species and cultures would need a common language. Commerce and trade alone would demand it. Take the writing on the Death Star panel for instance. How many differnet beings and different cultures and companies contracted to build that damn thing? How is the guy working on the turbolifts going to know how it fits into the palns for the infrastructure if it was built by another company from another species? This is why a kid from Tatooine can understand the readouts on something possibly designed by a species a half a galaxy away. This is also why people in the Star Wars Universe often speak so many languages...it's just part of the culture of growing up in a completely connected galaxy. Kids growing up in military families are often bi- or multi-lingual for the same reason.
Here's a link to the monster thread on the Nature of the Force.
http://www.ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=37044&highlight=Nature+of+the+Force