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HAPPILY EVER AFTER - a joke for my lady friends

sole seeker

2nd Level Indigo Feather
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My wife found this pretty funny. Go figure!



A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 Different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of Saying was, "Yes, Lollipop ... but at the bar ... You know ... they have frozen Glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?"

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious ... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that ..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"

And, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story? :veryhappy
 
god all those sickeningly endearing words... and finally she told him wow good for her or poopiekins or whatever ... yuck lolol

isabeau
 
Trixie, you may be related to my wife.

NT - you have a point!

isabeau said:
all those sickeningly endearing words... and finally she told him wow good for her or poopiekins or whatever ...
Yeah. I started to edit some of those "endearments." I left them, because I thought it might add to the humor, from a lady's point of view. (Hey, I'm a guy. I'm supposed to be baffled by your point of view!)
 
sole seeker said:
Trixie, you may be related to my wife.

NT - you have a point!

Yeah. I started to edit some of those "endearments." I left them, because I thought it might add to the humor, from a lady's point of view. (Hey, I'm a guy. I'm supposed to be baffled by your point of view!)

are you by any chance a blonde guy? lolol sorry couldnt resist that.. and the guy was calling her endearments also.. ya goof.

isabeau 😀
 
isabeau said:
are you by any chance a blonde guy? lolol sorry couldnt resist that.. ya goof.
Been so long since I had a full head of hair that I don't remember! :idunno: :dropatear
 
Makes you wonder why any guy would ever want to get married?

But realisitically, having been a wife, I can say this just ain't true. The more often you can get 'em out of the house, the better! Or is that why I'm not a wife anymore? 😉
 
This is the kind of joke that makes me glad I'm not married. 😀
 
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