I want to like the chat room, really I do!

[piyr]

It's not that I dislike it. I've tried it a couple times but it doesn't feel like a natural place for me to strike up conversations.

It's funny because I often find myself engaging with strangers out in public. I'll throw out an inconsequential comment and it goes from there with no real goal other than to pass time and be friendly.

But for some reason I can't get comfortable with starting or responding to initial chats. It just seems weird to get a message that starts off "do you tickle often?" Or, "do you want to talk about hot chicks that we'd want to tickle"? No, I don't. To be fair though, what else are they supposed to ask me? This is the tickling forum afterall.

I've made comments in the forums that resonate with people and turn into fun exchanges but those aren't conversations and tend to fade quickly even though we would probably click.

A random exchange in public is easier. Smiles, eye contact, comments, receptiveness, small talk and done. Maybe you connect later if there's personal or business interest but usually not.

Sometimes I wonder if most of the people that seem to know each other in the chat room met at an event rather than on a chat.

I want to like it, really I do, but It just hasn't clicked.

Thoughts?

 

[yinzer]

I haven't really used chat rooms since I first got online before social media was even really a thing. That was what people used back then. I liked it because I was extremely shy and introverted and I saw it as easier for me to meet new people that way, connect but at a distance, people I would be highly unlikely to ever have the opportunity to meet any other way.

I've actually been thinking I should maybe use chat here, particularly since the forums are often slow and I'm bored 😆 but I always end up feeling like I'd just be wasting my time. I think most, if not all, of the attractive women here get chased away by the creeps, harassed, overwhelmed and inundated with crass messages they don't' want to bother to sort thru to get to people who are genuine. I've seen multiple women on here complaining about this, which is how I know it's clearly a huge problem here.

Even now that I'm older, I'm still terrible at just striking up conversations with random strangers, so that's great you're comfortable with that. I've also always hated small talk, especially things like checking out at the stores (I always use self-checkout when it's available), haircuts, etc. I notice even at the gym talking to women is almost taboo and people don't seem to want to be bothered with it in general.

So yeah, I wish chat was a good place to meet and connect with genuine people, but I remain skeptical I wouldn't just end up wasting more time on this site than I already do!

 

[piyr]

You're right. Most public situations aren't condusive to random conversations with strangers. The gym is especially hard in my opinion.

When I chat with someone, it's usually because we're in proximity to each other and neither of us are going anywhere, ie waiting in line, dr office waiting room, waiting for a restaurant table. It's also easier because I'm not trying to meet the opposite sex. I'm literally just talking to whoever is there and wants to strike up a convo. In fact, I'm often with my wife. It drives her crazy. 😂 I think in the chat, defenses are up and it's automatically awkward by nature because of the type of forum.

 

[yinzer]

You're right. Most public situations aren't condusive to random conversations with strangers. The gym is especially hard in my opinion.

When I chat with someone, it's usually because we're in proximity to each other and neither of us are going anywhere, ie waiting in line, dr office waiting room, waiting for a restaurant table. It's also easier because I'm not trying to meet the opposite sex. I'm literally just talking to whoever is there and wants to strike up a convo. In fact, I'm often with my wife. It drives her crazy. 😂 I think in the chat, defenses are up and it's automatically awkward by nature of the type of forum.

I guess to clarify I should've really said 'especially' rather than 'even' at the gym haha. I'm usually just trying to focus on what I'm doing at the gym anyways, so not a great place to strike up conversation with random strangers, and like you say, most public places don't work well for that. On the other hand, I also know what you mean about situations where conversation can feel more natural, those times when you're both just maybe waiting for something like you mentioned.

 

[Ghostwriter727]

It's not that I dislike it. I've tried it a couple times but it doesn't feel like a natural place for me to strike up conversations.

It's funny because I often find myself engaging with strangers out in public. I'll throw out an inconsequential comment and it goes from there with no real goal other than to pass time and be friendly.

But for some reason I can't get comfortable with starting or responding to initial chats. It just seems weird to get a message that starts off "do you tickle often?" Or, "do you want to talk about hot chicks that we'd want to tickle"? No, I don't. To be fair though, what else are they supposed to ask me? This is the tickling forum afterall.

I've made comments in the forums that resonate with people and turn into fun exchanges but those aren't conversations and tend to fade quickly even though we would probably click.

A random exchange in public is easier. Smiles, eye contact, comments, receptiveness, small talk and done. Maybe you connect later if there's personal or business interest but usually not.

Sometimes I wonder if most of the people that seem to know each other in the chat room met at an event rather than on a chat.

I want to like it, really I do, but It just hasn't clicked.

Thoughts?

Timing plays a pretty big role in the chat community. When I get on the chat its usually because I have time to kill or just have a specific topic to fire off at the willing responders. (And sometimes it falls flat anyway)😂

It can feel frustrating at times, but again some people are already "private chatting" or some groups are just engaged in a topic that has been trending for a while.

Its a tricky task to get an fun, and responsive group of TMFers at times, but when you find the right tribe it can get pretty addicting as well.

Keep tryjng, and I'm sure you'll find a few diamonds in the coal. Hope this helps a little.🤙