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Impromptu Date Turns Awkward

I should clarify by saying that this thread wasn't specifically the creepy one I was talking about, it just happened to be one that caught my eye. We've lived different lives but I can't say that when I've had to tell a girl I'm not interested, it's not been effective- Most normal people accept it and move on. Maybe if you skirted around the issue and only dropped subtle "I'm not into you" hints then they might not be deterred, but that's why I suggested a direct and honest approach.

We obviously read the story in different ways as well. But to me, while possibly the OP wasn't intending to be malicious, there was a certain amount of "Hey this girl is into me but I don't give a shit about her so why not just outright tell her what I'm into and either get something quick and easy or it makes her uncomfortable and she leaves me alone". Which strikes me as pretty disrespectful, and vaguely misogynistic when you consider that he's only treating her that way because she was forward with him.
 
Well you definitely have more self control than me... I just got a new job and there's a few woman I'd love to date... of course, I feel the same way as you dating people you work with can be complicated. Even if you work well together while going out. Eventually you might break up and then when you see each other after you break up it could get hard to deal with so I control myself at work at keep my mouth shut about it but if I wasn't as work, hanging out with one of them in person and one of them told me she's really ticklish, I'd probably say, "Oh really?" And try tickling her... so good for you and your self control. Hopefully she'll back off so there's no more awkward situations.
"
 
Well played, Sir. You said all of the right things to/with me. I daresay I might envy your intelligence =p.

Yeah no, if you'll drop the normal people card I'll more than accept that the people I hang out with aren't exactly normal. One of the girls I'm referring to definitely stalked me in the past (to a lesser degree but still) so there's certainly that. The rest of my cases I'm probably thinking about some overly needy guys that just don't know when to stop, so I'll totally accept your answer. I probably didn't think too hard about where my experiences were coming from.

I'll also definitely give you the latter though more based upon the op's after-the-fact commentary. I won't judge about that, people hook up all the time just to hook up, no strings attached fuck-buddies and all, and I won't deny that there are times that said relationship could lead elsewhere, but yeah, the whole taking advantage of people aspect. I think I glossed over that more than I should have in my first reading because I was so focused on the push-her-away aspect of the story. Regardless I'll still say it was a clever and well played move even if it is a bit less than nice. Mostly, he gets what he wants either way.

Unless this goes into some alternative, third grey area that isn't a part of the binary she'll rock it/she'll back off. Now THAT would be interesting to hear about.
 
You were honest and up front with her, now if she still pursues you even though you have told her about you love for tickling, and she said she could not handle it, then she is asking to be tickled I think. Let us know if she continues to flirt with you. If she texts you again, tell her she better leave you alone or you will tie and tickle her good, if she responds that she is willing to try it then go for it.
 
Lttg said:
pretty disrespectful, and vaguely misogynistic when you consider that he's only treating her that way because she was forward with him.
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Wow, talk about an overreaction. I think it was a brilliant way to find out if he could truly get something out of this girl, possibly a relationship if he got a spark from her. What if her reaction to it was positive and she said well I'm really ticklish but I'd be willing to try anything once?

Very nice job by the OP in getting to some kind of closure.
 
Am I the only one that thinks it strange that the OP wouldn't be willing to date someone from the work place due to it being awkward. But wouldn't find it awkward to have a tickle buddy from the workplace.
 
If that was her reaction, smokin, he'd still be what lttg described. He's setting up a situation where he potentially could take advantage of someone is what lttg meant, and yeah, he's right. Like, sure she could be into it and like it but he only threw it out there as an oh, well worst case scenario is she lets me play with her. The main thing was he wasn't interested unless she allowed him to use her to fulfill his desires, you know? In that regard he's taking advantage of her feelings towards him to satisfy himself.

But either way, the point was he was trying to push her away. I'm not saying he's wrong if she took the bait because, hey, I can totally dig a girl who is open to trying out new things. Iunno, I'm really conflicted in how I feel about the situation, honestly. I can relate because I'm not looking for a relationship and when people pursue me, eh, kind of sucks actually.

I am tired and not digging myself deeper into this rut I'm in, though.

@Scott. Dunno. Maybe I want to believe that if you're not having an emotional relationship with someone that it'll be easier to handle it ending when you both still work there? Still awkward to be sure but it's less likely to get into heated emotional moments and what not. But yeah, mostly, I hadn't thought of that either.
 
Dunno. Maybe I want to believe that if you're not having an emotional relationship with someone that it'll be easier to handle it ending when you both still work there? Still awkward to be sure but it's less likely to get into heated emotional moments and what not. But yeah, mostly, I hadn't thought of that either.
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Which doesn't mean it would be easy if the girl was emotionally attached and got used a little just for tickling.....
 
ticklehound said:
Thanks for the positive feedback... Interesting takes I must say...

A little update. I've only gotten 2 texts from her last night after I left (and none today): the first saying she had a "great time" and the other apologizing for seeming too "uptight." I kinda got the sense that maybe it dawned on her that if she pursued me further, she might find herself in a very compromising situation. She clearly ain't ready for that.

For me, I'm just not that into her. Also, technically, while I'm not her boss, I'm still in a position above her. Work is hard enough already without this kinda office romance drama. I've seen people quit, marriages broken and faces smashed.

That said, if she wants to try this tickling thing.......
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Congrats. Time to start adding her to the tally of girls you'll never see again.

I personally have a high score (fifteen girls or so) but maybe you can beat it!
 
ElFewja said:
If that was her reaction, smokin, he'd still be what lttg described. He's setting up a situation where he potentially could take advantage of someone is what lttg meant, and yeah, he's right. Like, sure she could be into it and like it but he only threw it out there as an oh, well worst case scenario is she lets me play with her. The main thing was he wasn't interested unless she allowed him to use her to fulfill his desires, you know?
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Yes but that is my point, it's a win-win situation for him. If she rejects the idea then he really was trying to get rid of her anyway.

On the other hand she might be a fun tickle toy he can exploit til one of them tires of it. Instead of blowing her off completely, he left the door open and may be able to take advantage of it.
 
Whoa! Hey, everyone... thanks again...

For the record, I'm not lookin' to "take advantage" of her; using her feelings towards as a ways for me to tickle the hell outta her.

The ultimate point was, seeing as I really wasn't looking to cajole her or "win her over," I felt free to throw caution into the wind & just be blunt and open about myself. There was no plan, no gimmick, no game... pretty much improvisation. Were I really interested in her, I'd have been trying my best to impress her & wouldn't have disclosed the tickling angle from the jump.

I mean, as aloof as I was, my merely suddenly changing the subject from casual talk to something more personal & kinky might've been enough to throw her off....

I like to think, at some point, during that afternoon, I would've told her "Thank you, I'm flattered, but I'm sorry; I'm not interested." --- but the conversation didn't go that way. And like I said, I probably could've handled it better, but such is life.

BTW: I haven't seen her since Monday... I know she was off the last couple days... but I will keep y'all posted.
 
A lot of the models I work with have never been tied up and tickled before, and they think it's going to be worse than it actually is. I frequently get comments after shoots like, "that was really fun actually". I can see this happening where a girlfriend/boyfriend might like it after they try it. Go easy the first time.
 
On the other hand she might be a fun tickle toy he can exploit til one of them tires of it. Instead of blowing her off completely, he left the door open and may be able to take advantage of it.
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Yeah, what a nice guy!
 
On a related note I watched a friend discussing relationships with his bros lately and he -- my friend -- complained that any time he/a guy in general pursues a relationship it seems to not work, whereas people who aren't or are otherwise jerks to girls somehow pull it off.
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Your friend has hit the nail on the head, It took me a while to realise it but if you don't pursue women then they will pursue you. These so called jerks are clearly not interested that's why they win.
 
As an aside, saying you have a not nice word for it is effectively like just saying the word itself. It's just as insulting if not more so because you're leaving it up to everyone else to decide what you're thinking for you.
 
As an aside, saying you have a not nice word for it is effectively like just saying the word itself. It's just as insulting if not more so because you're leaving it up to everyone else to decide what you're thinking for you.
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I highly doubt anybody cares what I'm thinking for me. 🙂
 
Win / Win?!?

This is a great thread IMO. I love the real-life stuff instead of all the model/celeb drivel that often dominates the TMF.

I see a lot of posters calling the OP's gambit "Brilliant!" and a "Win/Win scenario".

To tell you the truth, I don't see it that way and here's why:
He didn't get to tickle her and he didn't get laid.

Now, I realize he wasn't all that into her, but he was into her enough to want to tickle torture her and she was a prime candidate who was Hot as Hell for him. Those don't come down the pipe too often for 98% of guys. I don't care who you are.

Here is what I would have done differently to achieve the above stated goals:

When the conversation turned to sex and what you're into, I would have responded with "I have a kinky streak. A little light bondage and a couple of techniques guaranteed to put a permasmile on your face and a rush to your head. Are you up for a little adventure?"

Most women will take that bait. If not, she's wound too tight anyway. Pass. No regrets.

When they do take the bait, seduce the hell out of her. Warm up the iron and strike when it's hot.
Tie her up with silk ties and blindfold her. Foreplay Fiveplay Sixplay.
Tell her you have a little friend you want her to meet and tickle her nose with a feather.
Remove the blindfold and tell her she's in for a wild ride.
Taunt, tease and tickle the Hell Holy Beejeebuz out of her.
Give her an experience she'll never forget, then untie her ankles and fuck her brains out.

The sex will make up for any of the other so-called "malfeasants".

There's your Win/Win scenario!

I've done this and it works. Almost always.
If she's not ticklish .. well, ya gave it a shot.

If she reacts badly, well ... ya can't please 'em all. At least she got part of what she wanted. There are no guarantees in sexual adventures and ya can't expect to please 'em all.
If she agrees to be tied up and you don't leave marks, there's not much anyone can do, and think about this:
She won't even run around blabbing at work about how you abused her after she agreed to be tied up.
A story like that would make most people laugh and make her look like an idiot.

Happy Hunting!
 
Nothing wrong with telling the truth. However, don't be suprised if she eventually comes back around to try this "tickling."
 
P[a]pi said:
Nothing wrong with telling the truth. However, don't be suprised if she eventually comes back around to try this "tickling."
Click to expand...

There is nothing wrong with telling the truth, but when you're playing the game, keep your poker face on and your cards close to your vest, if you want to win a hand or two!
 
Hey everyone.. thanks again for the comments...

Sadly, not a major update. I went out of town for a couple days, then when I got back, she had taken some time off work for a knee injury. So I haven't seen her since that encounter, but we have texted back & forth quite a bit.

I honestly don't think she was that put off by the tickling talk. I think it took her by surprise the way I went from politely-not-interested to confessing-kinky-bedroom-secrets pretty swiftly.

I think she's probably more put off that I'm more interested in one of her colleagues than her. Word got out around work very quickly about who likes whom, etc. It's a long story... but you know how office gossip works.
 
Highschool never ends =p.

It's cool that you're still talking to her though. If it were me I'd probably start seeing that girl and I feel bad for thinking that, because I think she would totally let me tickle her and that's a lot of the reason for thinking that. I hate being a guy sometimes.
 
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