Interracial Relationships What do you think of them?

[Mimi]

I've dated several different races and loved every single one of them. The body is merely a shell that hosts the soul, so who gives a shit what kind of package it comes in? How boring would it be if we were all the same color, same size, same appearance? Blah. No thanks. I like to spice things up with lotsa variety.

And anyone who has a problem with interraction relationships has never tasted the delicious flavors of the bountiful human buffet. Screw em. More for the rest of us. 😀

Mimi 😉

 

[MrPartickler]

I can remember dating exclusively within my race when I was in h.s. and college. Now I look back on those years and see sooo many wasted opportunities at happiness and just plain fun due not only to the relative homogeneity of my environment, but also to simple conformity and closemindedness. I'm living in a completely different world now in more ways than one.

I don't want to be too hard on <i>everyone</i> who just gives a second look at something/someone they may hardly ever encounter. Some people seeing you and your g/f may be getting up the nerve to break with the norm and date outside their race themselves. For many others, I just think people just come to discover what's important at different times, rates, and stages in their lives. Some are fortunate enough to be brought up in very open-minded, liberal homes and cultures, but others have to go out, live life and expand their horizons before they see and realize what's really important and what's not. And remember it's not just race that's subject to unwarranted criticism or disapproving looks, it's also things like gender norms/roles, sexual preference(s), behaviors, religions, cultures, nationalities, etc. Like it or not, these things are entrenched. If we're honest with ourselves, we'll likely find we may not all possess the same advanced degree of librality with <i>everything</i> we enounter in life--not yet at least.

Back on-topic, I've dated just about every race at least once now. (It's very diverse where I live, so the ones I've missed isn't for lack of trying. 😉) How you choose to respond to people's stares or odd looks really depends on you and who you're with. The woman I've been dating most recently and I find humor it all. We sometimes do things like count the stares and keep score, then we compare notes and laugh. lol We often poke fun of all the sterotypes of each of our races and backgrounds all the time. It's hilarious. On the flipside, I've also been in relationships where everything was unsaid, and we just ignored things like that altogether. I have to say, I prefer having a sense of humor about it all. Who couldn't use more laughter in their lives? 🙂

 

[Illtcklu]

Other poeple should never control who you date! I believe if it is two consenting adults then thats FINE! Interacail, or age, or even homosexual, who cares it's not YOUR problem! Deal with your own issues first, let others worry about theirs

 

[Illtcklu]

My friend, I totally know how you feel. Wonderful to hear about you and your gf, and I hope things continue to do well for you guys. I have dated outside my race many times and have found interracial dating to be a very postive experience. Sure, there's the rude stares and outright audacity of people who think it is their right to correct your behavior (as if you are doing anything wrong), but just remember that there's alot of stupid people in this world, and you choose who you let get to you. The way other people feel about you and your gf isn't going to change the fact that you two really like each other, is it? Of course not!

My opinion on interracial relationships is that it doesn't matter who you're with, as long as you guys get along, who cares, right? You can't help who you fall in love with.

Best of luck to you both!

--T

ANY man would be LUCKY to have you as a G/F, Tamia!!!!

 

[Mimi]

ANY man would be LUCKY to have you as a G/F, Tamia!!!!

So would any girl, Illicious!!

 

[Illtcklu]

So would any girl, Illicious!!

WOOF!

 

[Angel_2]

Hey Everyone

I am glad to say after talking with my g/f we have decided to stay together for a long time. We don't care what anyone thinks. We are happy and thats all that matters. Fuck the other people that don't like it. Thanks Again, You guys and gals are really great. I could not have done it with out you.

 

[Tamia78]

Yay!

Good for you! Now, if you can just talk to her about tickling..........hehehe.

 

[Angel_2]

Good for you! Now, if you can just talk to her about tickling..........hehehe.

In time that will come. Right now we are going nice and slow

 

[jreyn60]

I've dated outside my race as well. The first love of my life was black and those are some wonderful memories. We were lucky never to get much flak about it and it actually tought some of our friends to loosen up a little. Beauty knows no color. NEVER let people make you feel negative about it; all of those responses are fear-based and sadly, ingrained in our culture. Best to both of you!

jreyn60

 

[tkrexx]

Well-known TMF fact: TkRexx loves Asian women above all others. About 11 years ago on the first vacation I'd had in 13 years, I accidently met the woman who would eventually become my wife. Sounds hokey, but I knew that when I first laid eyes on her. I'm Anglo, she's not. She's not even American. I was visiting an old Marine buddy's family in the Philippines (My first trip there), she was the niece's Nanny. I was 33, she was 21. Beautiful golden-brown skin, a smile that could light candles from across the room, and eyes as big as the night. I've always been a fan of long hair, yet hers was ALOT shorter than mine (It was my longhair phase). The first night we met, I got hungry about 10 pm, she took me to get lechon manok (That's barbequed chicken for you AmeriKanos). 2 years later we were married in her home town.

The point I'm trying to make is that while I was horribly attracted to this gal from the moment we met, it was dumb luck that she is Asian. Her soul could be in any female body and I'd have married her anyway. Sure we get the stares, the gossip, the down-the-nose attitudes...But I didn't marry them, now did I? They don't matter any when I see our daughter, pretty little girl with Mama's eyes and Daddy's dimples, and know that if indeed my wife and I were of 2 different races, she would not be possible.

Rxx

 

[Bugman]

good for you stick with it tell everyone else to mind there own damn business

 

[Knox The Hatter]

We've posted about this subject before here...

I notice the idiots HERE haven't said a thing. You know, the ones who bandy about phrases in threads like "black beauty bitch", and other notables...

I've done this. My biggest memory of it all was seeing the world through her eyes; that perspective opened mine very wide. You know...why DID that family sitting next to us at the Hibachi in the Japanese restaurant move away from us? Was it really an innocent thing, they wanted more room to themselves...or...well, you get the picture. Of course, I'd do it again tomorrow, the rest of this moron world could sit on my middle finger and fucking rotate.

 

[CaptainQuantum]

If the couple is prepared for the inevitable negativity they're going to get, sometimes from strangers, sometimes from their own friends and family, then its fine. More importantly, they need to figure out how they're going to prepare any children they have together for that negativity.

 

[Knox The Hatter]

Captain, the image I have (as regards your last statement) is of Dr. King trying to explain to his younger daughter why she wasn't allowed in to the amusement park she saw advertised on television...

 

[nowayjose]

wanting to get an idea as to what you think of Interracial Relationships.

People should be proud of the variety of the human phenotype and how easily humanity can adapt their outward appearance to different environments, within a relatively short timeframe (under the skin, all humans are almost entirely the same, anyways). Mixing between people with different adaptations is benefical, since it throws in a blender the diverse successful mutations, making us stronger against diseases, environmental changes etc. This doesn't mean that everyone must seek out the complete opposite of himself, in genetic terms, but it won't harm anyone if he/she does so. Any kind of racism is just stupid; not only in societal and philosophical terms, but also from a plain biological and genetical point of view, and science is totally rebutting the silly hypotheses that racist idiots often have.

 

[chickles_:)]

You guys and gals really helped me out. I know I should not care what other people think about me and my gf and to tell you the truth I don't but like I said in my first post I have had my friends come up to me and tell me that they think I should stay within my group. Now I don't agree with that at all in fact I love interracial relationships. Not to long ago I went to a friends home for a BirthDay party and I had my gf with me. On the way as we walked down the street people just kept looking at us funny and I am sure in there head they said now what is she doing with this white guy? Anyway at the party it was ok we had fun but I got the feeling everyone was uneasy b/c me and my gf were the only Interracial couple in the house. No one made a sceen but you could tell some people were not happy about us. Now I don't care what they think but I do wonder why there is so much hate when it comes to Interracial Relationships? I just wish people could understand. 🙄
Thanks again to everyone that answered and if you have anything else to add please do.

Hiya Angel, everybody!
First of all i think you are an angel for seeing beyond the colour!
My parents had an interracial marriage at a time when it was majorly frowned upon by both sides. Funny too i just finished watching 'guess who's coming to dinner'
The other funny piece is what happens in some parts of the world where race is made an issue of. I remember my aunt visiting South Africa back when there was apartheid. the park benches were painted black and white,,, being Chinese, (and thereby part of the near 1/3 of the world's racial population - not counting Japanese, Koreans etc.) she wondered,,, "where do i sit"
I mean honestly. I know of people who have been hung up on which town-guy you date. tres bizarre.

The fact is that no matter who we go out with whether colour or nationality (the dad of one of my friends once told her she could date anyone at all - as long as he was Dutch) or financial status or pedigree (Back in China you still get looks if you date someone who is Haka) or weight or whatever.

No matter whom you pick there will ALWAYS be someone who will tell you that you ought to set your sights on someone
THEY consider better.

But at the end of the day the only things that matter are:

Do you feel happy when you are around him?
Does he treat you with respect and love? and,,
Does he know how to make you sizzle with the slow touch of his hand!

After that, who gives a cluck!! 😡

In the end the same holds true as with all other things: the ones who care about you will still care about you.

And - if you really love the person, you'll find a way to ignore the stares from people who haven't learned to climb out of their own tragic boxes.

Many blessings, Angel in your cross-cultural relationship!! You go, boy!

Chickles xxoo

 

[kis123]

If the couple is prepared for the inevitable negativity they're going to get, sometimes from strangers, sometimes from their own friends and family, then its fine. More importantly, they need to figure out how they're going to prepare any children they have together for that negativity.

There's no possible way you can prepare a child for all of the negativity that's out there-that's what living is all about. You take the bitter with the sweet and you deal with issues as they come. You let the kids know that there are some really great people in the world and that there are also some real jackasses too-some of them in the bodies of so-called friends and family. Some are teachers and student peers who make horribly ignorant statements then wonder why you're pissed about it. Some of them are in the form of coworkers at the water cooler gossiping instead of doing the work they're paid to do.

Now that I think of it, it's funny how my children have endured racism in their upbringing. My son, with chocolate-brown skin gets his racism mostly from strangers who are intimidated by black males. My son couldn't hurt a fly-he's very sweet-spirited and just wants to do his "thing" without anyone bothering him. My daughter who is biracial endures her racism from so-called friends and the closer they are, the greater the sting of their actions.

Kids are a lot stronger than many parents choose to let them be. I won't let anyone outright abuse my children, but I do allow them to fight their own battles and find their own way-it's called growing up where I come from. We're way too overprotective in today's society and do not properly prepare our kids for life in the real world. A little adversity never hurt anybody and they will make it through then thrive in this world if we just let them.

 

[kis123]

The other funny piece is what happens in some parts of the world where race is made an issue of. I remember my aunt visiting South Africa back when there was apartheid. the park benches were painted black and white,,, being Chinese, (and thereby part of the near 1/3 of the world's racial population - not counting Japanese, Koreans etc.) she wondered,,, "where do i sit"
I mean honestly. I know of people who have been hung up on which town-guy you date. tres bizarre.

The fact is that no matter who we go out with whether colour or nationality (the dad of one of my friends once told her she could date anyone at all - as long as he was Dutch) or financial status or pedigree (Back in China you still get looks if you date someone who is Haka) or weight or whatever.

Chickles, you reminded me of a very recent issue I dealt with at work. I was in negotiations placing a physician at a worksite when the client pipes up and starts asking some interesting questions. She noticed that the doc is originally from South Africa and was concerned about him having problems with the mostly Hispanic population. We get on the phone interview and find out that he's actually Chinese and changed his name to something more Americanized! He wasn't allowed to learn his native Chinese language as a child either-he still regrets that at age 73! He's turned out to be one of the nicest physicians I've worked with to date and the client loves him.

Just goes to show you can't judge the book by its cover!

 

[natural tickler]

I have no problem with it, because its like I've said all along, that love is universal, it has no color. We all should love each other anyway


my .02 cents

 

[drew70]

Here in the nation's capital we have a real hodgepodge of racial diversity. African, Asian, Latin, Caucasian, Arab, East Indian....the list goes on. I've seen beautiful women of all races. My wife is from Paraguay, and our differences are far more cultural than physical, but we have a great life together. People who refuse to romance outside of their race or culture are cutting themselves off from a lot of potential, in my opinion.

 

[Illtcklu]

Drew, that's great!!!! I have a friend who is also married to someone from South America!!! They are VERY happy together!!!

 

[chickles_:)]

Chickles, you reminded me of a very recent issue I dealt with at work. I was in negotiations placing a physician at a worksite when the client pipes up and starts asking some interesting questions. She noticed that the doc is originally from South Africa and was concerned about him having problems with the mostly Hispanic population. We get on the phone interview and find out that he's actually Chinese and changed his name to something more Americanized! He wasn't allowed to learn his native Chinese language as a child either-he still regrets that at age 73! He's turned out to be one of the nicest physicians I've worked with to date and the client loves him.

Just goes to show you can't judge the book by its cover!

Hiya Kis,,
I'm so glad your situation worked out! 🙂
I guess i would have been happier still if the doc had been originally from S.A. and the client had to eat her words about suspecting that South Africans can be expected to have problems with Hispanics.

In any case, i know what you are saying... I remember at a business conference once a colleague with another operation was concerned about a guy from Ghana coming on board. She said, "wht if he's a wife-beater?" (!)
Can you imagine??

I had to really control it. The most i could say was to suggest that i would hate to have people assume that i agree women should have their feet bound just because i'm half-Chinese!

I think she got the message. her observation didn't go any further thank God!

Anyway, Angel, once again i wish you the very best!

Many blessings,
Chickles

 

[Knox The Hatter]

So many ignorant clowns. So little time.

 

[Angel_2]

So many ignorant clowns. So little time.

Tell me about it. People got to mind there own dam bussiness