It's hard to be myself when dating

[GirlWhoLikes2Laugh]

Jen, you are very brave and very cool. I admire u soooo much... pls just be happy and be so thankful that you are who you are... you are special, and that makes all the difference.... i work in a hospital, am not stranger to "challenges" and u seem to glide over them...

I admire you.

Lea

Thanks for what you said Lea. You are very sweet to say that.

 

[GirlWhoLikes2Laugh]

If you keep waiting for some idealized conception of a man that you keep stored in your head to magically appear fully formed, then it's never going to happen. And based on your previous posts on this subject, when it continually fails to happen, you're just going to use your disorder as an excuse, and in doing so, reinforce your own sense of alienation. That's something you have to break out of on your own, and nobody can give you a blueprint on how to do it. All that can be done is to point out that is indeed a huge issue and hope you take it to heart.

I will add one thing to that, which is that if you just try to take something as it goes, you might find it's a lot easier. If, on the first date you ever have with a guy you already find yourself fretting over whether or not the guy is going to 'get' you, then you're already setting yourself up for disappointment.

I think this is the best response to this whole thread as a few other people have said. I will DEFINITELY keep this in mind Strider. I don't want to use my disorder as a crutch or an excuse. However, I want to be proud of who I am and just basically be myself. I have been going out with a great guy who asked me out in November and we've been going out ever since. We're both met when I joined this group called New Horizons in April 2007. Things are getting serious between us because he met my parents and I've met a lot of his family. Hopefully, we'll get married someday but we'll see what happens.

Thank you for your advice Strider.

 

[venray]

All I can offer Jen is that having met you I (Like Drew) have found you to be personable,sweet, and fun....

Sometimes you try a little too hard and when it doesnt work out you get frustrated...

This happens to all of us but a little moreso to someone with AS..

Cliche as this may sound......Just be you....have faith that the person that you are inside is someone people will like...

The right guy will come along and you will find happiness.....No guarantees on a time frame....🙂

 

[chicago]

I'm not sure I would be mentioning, let alone thinking, about marriage so early in the relationship. That can be dangerous sometimes. But you sound happy, so congratulations.

Best of luck.

 

[Babbles]

Geez, it was such a simple request...

I thought I replied to this thread, but I guess not,
and I'm very sorry I didn't in fact since I was (once again) disappointed reading through the earlier pages, which were certainly not at all merited here. I hope most of that crap can be removed.

I've also met you, Jen, and I agree with those who've said you're a very gentle, friendly, sweet and comfortable person; I remember having great conversations with you, and detecting nothing at all unpleasant or unusual in any negative way. With no exaggeration whatsoever, as I'm sure I've stated elsewhere.

Extremely glad you seem to have finally met someone worthy of you, and I hope that sticks, as it seems. 😀

Five months is a long enough amount of time for most people to (have some idea....). Some say people know within a month or so, but.... it depends upon individuals, and this seems reasonable.

If he is the right one for you, I hope you have increasingly good news