Most Difficult Thing To Come Out About, Etc.

[mustang]

Like most people here I spent too many years in the closet in regard to my foot/tickle fetish fearful of being discovered and called a perv. As I grew older I discovered that I wasn't alone in this thing and gradually began coming out. I started by admitting to my foot fetish, because I believed that it was common enough not to freak too many people out. I would explain that every guy has a favorite body part...leg-men, booty-men, titty-men. I just happened to be a foot-man. When I discovered this forum and found out that I had LOTS of company, it really embolded me. Then, I began to come out, a little at a time, in regard to my fetish for foot tickling. That was harder because it seemed stranger than just having a foot fetish. To tell the truth, I am still a little guarded about that one. But, the really hard thing for me to do was to admit that foot tickling was very sexual to me. Again, finding out that lots of people in this forum find foot tickling sexually stimulating helped a lot. But, it is still the most difficult thing to come out about, and yes, I only admit it to my significant others. For instance, I had a girlfriend a while back who was extremely accomodating about letting me 'get off' on her feet...usually by giving me a handjob while I tickled her feet. She would tease me by asking if I wanted some nookie or a foot tickle tonight. I usually wanted both. It did blow her mind a little when one night I asked her to keep her toes curled back while I ran the arch of her foot over myself till I came. But, back to the main point, it is still awkward to admit that foot tickling is sexual to me. That is the last fear to be conquered. The thing that spurs me on is knowing that if I am not bold about it I will never have any foot tickling sexual encounters. It is worth the risk, but difficult.

 

[Comfort Eagle]

Maybe it's just my social retardery as a whole, but I've never had a problem 'coming out" with it to women.

Like, at all.

 

[CuteJill143]

The hardest part of coming out is that a Vanilla person can't completely understand the way that I do. I feel in a way I sugar coat how I feel about it and they don't think I like it as much as I'll actually admit to.

 

[nmqrs]

The hardest part of coming out is that a Vanilla person can't completely understand the way that I do.

^This is complete accurate, I think. Even if I were to explain it, it would be like... if someone translated a phrase in a foreign language for me. Sure, if I heard it, I'd be able to recognize it and work from there, but I wouldn't fully grasp its nuance, nor would I really feel comfortable using it myself, because it just isn't part of the way I think.

 

[scorpionldr]

to me its just difficult. And when I say difficult, I mean that I'm a guy that really has had about only two good short term partners who handled tickling. Both (along with all the girls I'd dated) had been with usually a half-dozen men by the time I met them. And it was bothersome to me being "the tickle guy" out of all the other ones that just wanted in and out. "oh, you don't like sex as much". "oh, you have that sick/freaky/weird fetish". "oh, none of the other guys wanted that from me before ever".

So in short, there's no way of escaping the entire "this is different for me" experience. And there are way too many girls around me that don't like being tickled.

 

[Dave Pavet]

I never come out unless it's with somebody in a forum like this or someone with similar interests.

 

[BritTickler]

I was actually pretty quiet about it with my first girlfriend, but that wasn't really anything to do with embarrassment and more that we had a lot (and I mean a lot!) of issues, such that tickling wasn't exactly my number one priority at the time! How times have changed. Anyway I couldn't imagine not being open and honest about my fetish now. I don't mind if they think it's weird - it is weird after all! It's when someone makes the leap from thinking I'm weird to thinking I'm a weirdo that I'd be unhappy - thankfully I've never encountered a girl as shallow as that so far, and I don't think they'd be the right sort of person for me if they were. But anyway, people hide who they are enough as it is - if we can't tell our spouse (or whoever) about something as silly and, in the grand scheme of things, minor as being into tickling, what can we tell them? It's hard but I think we need to be as honest as possible 🙂

Incidentally, I found it interesting that you chose (as many do) to start off by revealing your taste for feet before moving on to admit the apparently bigger and darker secret of liking tickling! Whilst I'm sure tickle fetishism is a good deal rarer, it's always struck me as something considerably less strange and more explainable than the feet thing: tickling is a pretty normal within the world of basic social interaction, especially flirting. It's a common sight amongst courting couples and seems to quite naturally have the reputation of being something cute yet flirty, playful yet sexy. Well okay, maybe it isn't quite romanticised by the mainstream as much as all that, but the point is it'd be a good deal more acceptable to tickle a girl in the park than to put her foot in your mouth! It's true that foot fetishism is less of an unknown quantity out there, but given the almost uniformly negative attitude towards fetishism (and indeed difference in general) by the mainstream, I'm pretty sure that outing yourself as a 'footguy' is going to come with at least just as much baggage attached as admitting a proclivity for tickling.

 

[mustang]

In my experience, nobody that I have encountered thinks that being attracted to pretty feet is strange at all. Different, but not strange as in creepy. But, when the subject of being into tickling feet comes up, just about everyone in the straight world snickers, or jests, or rolls their eyes. That being the case, you can imagine what the straight folks think about getting a boner while tickling feet and jacking off. There are degrees in regard to the perception of weirdness...feet, no big deal... getting off on tickling feet, a bit strange...having a screaming orgasm while tickling feet, downright bizarre. Of course, all of this applies to encounters with straights. But let's face it. We live in a world where the vast majority of folks are straight and we have to navigate through this world. It would be nice if we all lived on an island where everyone was just like us, but relatively speaking, very few in the real world are like us. That being the case we have to exercise some caution and develop some coping skills. Maybe the day will come when you can walk through a mall wearing a t-shirt that says "I get off on tickling feet...any takers?" But that day will take some time coming.

 

[Soda Bobinski]

Maybe the day will come when you can walk through a mall wearing a t-shirt that says "I get off on tickling feet...any takers?"

Yes. That is exactly the kind of society I want to live in.




"Mommy?"

"Yes , dear?"

"I dunno what t'get gammy fer her birfday."

"Well , she does really enjoy it when granddaddy goes potty on her face. Maybe you can get her an 'I scat' hat?"

"..."

 

[Phineas]

IIncidentally, I found it interesting that you chose (as many do) to start off by revealing your taste for feet before moving on to admit the apparently bigger and darker secret of liking tickling! Whilst I'm sure tickle fetishism is a good deal rarer, it's always struck me as something considerably less strange and more explainable than the feet thing: tickling is a pretty normal within the world of basic social interaction, especially flirting. It's a common sight amongst courting couples and seems to quite naturally have the reputation of being something cute yet flirty, playful yet sexy. Well okay, maybe it isn't quite romanticised by the mainstream as much as all that, but the point is it'd be a good deal more acceptable to tickle a girl in the park than to put her foot in your mouth!

I think there's a bit more to it than that. When people from this forum say, "I have a tickle fetish", what they usually mean is that they want to get the person they're outing themselves to into a situation that involves shackles, baby oil, and a Sonicare. There's tickling, which couples usually do, and then there's Serious Business. I would have no problem telling a girl I was dating that I liked tickling her. Admitting to liking the kind of stuff that gets posted here on a regular basis? That's quite different.

As far as the foot fetish goes, what I've found is that most women don't immediately equate having a foot fetish with sex, oddly enough. Every woman I've ever told I liked feet assumed that all it meant was, I liked to touch them and look at them. They had no idea what footjobs were, or that I could get a boner from giving them a foot massage. I've always found it weird that a woman who'd never let you touch her boobs would stick her feet in your face if you admitted to having a fetish. They really don't make the connection that it's the same thing.

Honestly, I've found that the more often you 'come out', the easier it gets. You just have to learn how to come out to the right people, so that it becomes a positive experience. I mean, I've never had anyone react negatively. Consequently, admitting to anyone that I have a foot fetish is no big deal at all. I can discuss it like I'm discussing the weather.

 

[MaleTickleeDC]

There is really no need to tell anyone about a fetish other than likeminded fetishists and those who might potentially want to share your fetish with you, like a significant other (or the hottie you met at the bar last night).

Having a fetish as part of one's public persona is going to ensure that person is viewed as strange by everyone around him. That's just the reality of the situation, and there's no point in pretending otherwise. And as someone said upthread, there's just no way that any of "us" can ever truly articulate the essence of our interest in tickling to a vanilla person. It would be like trying to explain to an alien from another planet why heterosexual men like to look at women's breasts. To the alien, looking at breasts would be no different from looking at a potted plant. Similarly, when we try to explain to a vanilla person that tickling turns us on, we might as well be saying that goat cheese turns us on. I.e., they'll never be able to relate to it, and they'll forever harbor reservations about our psychological fitness in the backs of their minds.

 

[TickleMyFancy]

It's nerve wracking coming out to a vanilla. I agree it should be done (to your partner), it's still intimidating. Like O.O

 

[Em Es]

Easier said than done, of course, but . . .

For goodness' sake, being into tickling or feet is not like having done time for murder or voting Republican.

Sure, I feel self-conscious about being so hot to tickle women. But the best way to break in a vanilla person is to treat it as if it's as natural as your sex drive. Believe me, if the person is worth your while, he or she will do a quick study in order to please you. Those not worth your while won't have to wait until foot worship or tickling is on the table to judge you - the wrong numbers are ready to pounce about the most mundane topics, aren't they?

 

[usgrant]

Your biggest mistake is not voting Republican.

 

[Em Es]

usgrant

I wasn't trying to hijack the discussion with my "Republican" aside!

 

[Horatio]

The most difficult thing for me about coming out is that a few people do know of my tickling fetish, they just don't know the depth and severity of it.. 🙂

 

[cttickler44]

*sigh* still never done it...fml