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My Happy, but Heavy, Heart

SimplyRio

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After months, well actually years, of anticipation we sent my boy off to Navy Boot Camp today. My heart has never been more filled with pride, nor has it felt such depths of sadness at his leaving. Not to fear, though... I spared him my shoulder-shaking sobs, holding back until he was well out of sight. It was important to me that I be brave for him. The crying jags will continue, I suspect, for at least the next few days. Every road I navigate, every landmark I pass, every meal I prepare, or silly commercial I see triggers so many memories that I shared with this amazing young man who has so much to offer and is now venturing out to make his mark on the world.

It was so typical of him to look back at me with his own tear-brimmed eyes, flashing me that dazzling grin of his as he winked and give me a thumbs up before riding away.

Time marches on and, now, so does my son.

Proud Navy Mom
 
That post really puts a lump in the throat. I think I'm gonna cry too..

I wish all the best for you and your son.
 
Awwwwww, Fairfeather, you are too sweet. Thank you so much for your best wishes 🙂

I'm sorry, I really do want to put the most positive spin possible on this day. Here's, hopefully, a happier thought:

My last image of him... he watched me waving and waving and waving until we wouldn't be able to see each other any more. Just as we were about out of range of each other, I blew him a kiss the way I used to when he was a little boy. I wasn't even sure that he would see me or, even if he did, that he would acknowledge it so as not to embarrass himself in front of the others. I'll be darned if he not only caught my kiss, but he blew one back too! I couldn't see details, only his silhouette in the window of his departing vehicle that seemed to be moving away in slow motion. This loving image will remain burned in my memory forever (happy sigh)
 
Military service will make him even bigger and better. You just watch. You will be proud.
 
Oh Rio,
Not many things on this board make me weepy, but THANK YOU VERY MUCH for being sure it happens! LOL Silly girl...just think of all the fun-filled post-boot-camp tales he's gonna bring home to you. Erm...erase that, that he brings home to the Dragon! LOL
Go Navy, eh?

Lawd, you unleashed someone of your fancy into the military! God help the enemies! 😛 He's gonna have them so confused and bewildered! 😛 You've done well, Mom. Now sit back and soak in the glow of it!

J.
 
Congrats Rio!!

Well, for starters, you don't look old enough to have a son that age but I digress...

you are a sweet lady and I'm sure your son is as sweet as you and will go far. I have two cousins in the Navy that I'm quite proud of so I know, to some extent, how you feel.
If you ever need to talk, I'm just a Pm or e-mail away!!😀
 
I promised myself I wouldn't cry...

Congrats on raising a fine lad ForeverRio!
 
I've been where he's going...
Write him often...send pictures, send him words of encouragement, of course, but most of all, send him word that the best way to get through boot camp is to let his sense of humor take rein.
If he went to Great Lakes, he couldn't have picked a more frigid time. It's colder than hell up there. He'll be warm, but the cold can have an effect on one's outlook.
Tell him that the best way to get through is never to worry about anything. No pressure. Pressure's for the other guy, as Dan Ackroyd said in "Trading Places". Do what they tell ya, and do it fast.
I'm gonna tell ya right now...the first week for him will be very tough, being away from home. I remember those nights the first week when after the lights went out, something would happen, someone made a noise, someone farted, or burped, or whatever, and everyone in the company, a good eighty people, would laugh uproariously for a half hour. I also remember another night when all you could hear, throughout the huge room, was crying. A whole room of eighty seventeen and eighteen year old boys crying and sniffling.
A major source of joy will be the first mail call, when he hears from ya. Will make him warm inside for the next several days...as will all subsequent correspondence.
When he's down, please tell him to take everything in...there will be a time later in life when he will look back on this time, and wish he could live it again. There are characters I met in Great Lakes who I remember vividly twenty three years later, who I think about when I'm blue. Never fails to bring laughter when there was a frown.
Most of all...tell him you love him.
All my best, Rio.

KNOX THE HATTER
Proud United States Navy Veteran
 
TKpervert said:
Military service will make him even bigger and better. You just watch. You will be proud.
Thank you, TKP... I really appreciate your words of encouragement 🙂
 
JoBelle said:
Lawd, you unleashed someone of your fancy into the military! God help the enemies! 😛 He's gonna have them so confused and bewildered! 😛 You've done well, Mom. Now sit back and soak in the glow of it!

J.
I know, I know... sending one of my young 'uns out into the world should put everybody on alert! LOL

Thank you for the kinds wordy, Joby. I imagine very soon my tears of pride will outnumber my tears of sadness. In the meantime, you can bet I will do my best to enjoy the fruits of my labors.

As for the wild tales of boot camp... I'm torn -- I'm so curious but, on the other hand, I'm thinking I don't EVEN wanna know LOL I'm sure David is much better equipped to hear the more gory details!

Thanks again, Luv (hug)
 
Congratulations on your sons journey into the Navy. LIke Knox said, the first week or two will be rough to say the least. Not only will he be away from home, but he will be in a totally different environment that he is used to. He will get alot out of it though. He will have more confidence in himself because he is succeding in a very highly competitive situation. He and his shipmates will develop a camradarie second to none. Oh, the stories he will have for you when he graduates.

The first two weeks though, write him and write alot.

I remember when I saw my parents on liberty. they did not recognize me with my crew cut. I also remember getting sun poisoned on my ears b/c that was the first time I had my ears showing since I was 3
 
crydun said:

Well, for starters, you don't look old enough to have a son that age but I digress...
cry, cry, cry... I KNEW I liked you! hee hee hee thank you so much, my sweet little friend. I had him when I was 10 years old... yeah, THAT'S it! 😉

crydun said:

you are a sweet lady and I'm sure your son is as sweet as you and will go far. I have two cousins in the Navy that I'm quite proud of so I know, to some extent, how you feel.
Realizing that I *am* his mother, I truly do believe he is one of the nicest people I've ever known. He has accomplished so much already in his short life and I know he will go far. I know Boot Camp is going to give him an edge, and I can't wait to see how he turns out!


Thank you again for your loving words and support, Sweetie.
 
Knox The Hatter said:

I've been where he's going...
Write him often...send pictures, send him words of encouragement, of course, but most of all, send him word that the best way to get through boot camp is to let his sense of humor take rein.
Thank you, Knox. He left only yesterday and I've already written him two letters. I definitely plan to shower him with words of encouragement throughout his stay at Boot Camp. I've even enlisted the aid of all his aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends to join in... at his Going Away party I forewarned all fo them that they would be provided a sheet of his address labels, once I get his Ship and Division numbers LOL

Knox The Hatter said:

If he went to Great Lakes, he couldn't have picked a more frigid time. It's colder than hell up there.
He did go to Great Lakes (the Navy closed down their San Diego boot camp facility). It's funny... he enlisted in June, right after high school graduation. We were told his entry was delayed because he had to wait for an anticipated opening in the job he qualified for (JO-Journalist). Here we were, so concerned he'd have to be dealing with the heat of Chicago (he doesn't do great in extreme heat), but instead he'll be dealing with practicallly sub-zero temperatures!

Knox The Hatter said:

I'm gonna tell ya right now...the first week for him will be very tough, being away from home.

Knox, thank you for sharing your little snippets of Boot Camp life during those first couple of weeks - I loved reading that! I am certain he is making a lot of new buddies memories that will last a lifetime and will, no doubt, be fodder for some GREAT stories he'll share with his grandkids! You really did bring a(nother) tear to my eye with your sentiments... thanks again for sharing.
 
giantfan121262 said:
Congratulations on your sons journey into the Navy...

I remember when I saw my parents on liberty. they did not recognize me with my crew cut.

Thank you so much, gfan... the grief I feel at sending him off is surpassed only by my pride. I do take great comfort in knowing that Boot Camp is just the start of his great journey - thank you for your encouraging words.

At his Going Away party I had the pleasure of giving him a ceremonial shaving of the head. His uncles (my brothers) played a little trick on him by producing a second set of shears, claiming that "in the REAL military you're required to be shaved COMPLETELY" The look on my son's face was priceless and we all had a good laugh at his expense... he laughed too, after all the shears were safely stowed away!

Thanks again for sharing your stories. Reading them really does help me cope with his absence.
 
Dearest Rio,

You told me awhile ago this was coming, and now that it has, you're as sad and happy as I suspected you would. It's tough to see your kids go, but he sounds like he was prepared well for this day by you, and has a good head on his shoulders. He's going tot serve his country, which will only add to his already impressive credits. I know you'll still be melancholy, but time will elevate your spirits, with his exploits and letters. 😀 And I know TD and we all will be happy to help try to keep you smiling...

Smiley
 
Wow, your experience brings back memories...

The best I can say is what others have already said. Write to him as often as possible, always offering encouragement. When I went through his situation, the best thing that kept me going was hearing from my loved ones back at home, and having that connection to the "real" world, as opposed to the "green" world, or "blue" world, in his case. God bless him.
 
Smiley,
You always know how to say just the right thing... thank you 🙂

Seriously, though 😉 thank you for affirming what we already know - he's entering as a really great kid and I know he'll emerge as an even finer young man. It's really tough for me to not be able to have contact with him, but I know he's doing something really important not only for our country, but for himself as well. My tears of pride are now seriously competing with tears of grief.

As with life in general, I know this time will pass quickly. I can't wait to hear of his BC exploits... well, wait... maybe I can LOL

Thanks again, Dearie.
 
Flatfoot said:
Write to him as often as possible, always offering encouragement. When I went through his situation, the best thing that kept me going was hearing from my loved ones back at home, and having that connection to the "real" world, as opposed to the "green" world, or "blue" world, in his case. God bless him.
Flatfoot,
We finally heard from him this morning, getting confirmation that he had arrived safely at the Recruit Training Command... and we already received his mailing information! My initial thought was to limit my letters because he'd have to do 10 push ups for each piece of mail he received. However, after hearing the same sentiment from you lovely gents (you, Knox, and giantfan) who have actually experienced Boot Camp, I've begun a letter-writing campaign amongst family and friends!

Thank you so much for your kind sentiments and blessings, I really appreciate them!
 
Back when I was there, the first full day started at 0430, or 4:30 AM. Still dark outside on the grinder, and he's on his way to his first chow, which wasn't as bad as people have made it out to be, but...well, you know. After that, he gets a little 'chit' or a slip of paper that he's supposed to hand to the barber when he gets all of his hair sheared off, in a matter of seconds. Today, I'm sure that this isn't as interesting an evolution as when I was there, when we all had more hair than Cousin Itt. By now, the rest of Great Lakes has awakened, and your son's new company has to march past other companies further along in training. The surest way to tell how far along in training they are is by the length of their hair. He might hear a stray remark or two from the aforementioned, for instance, "oh look, new ____." They always have a word to describe the newest recruits. In my day, we were "Raisins." One of our guys came up with a song..."we are raisins, you are rocks, we eat poontang, you suck..." well, you get the idea.
Further along, he will go to his first uniform issue. He'll be there for three or four hours or so, while they measure him, and then he'll get his first, ill fitting uniform, with a couple of Filipino Supply Chiefs yelling and screaming at him all the while in an unintelligable accent. He'll then wait for some indeterminable amount of time for his bedding as well. Then, in his new ill fitting dungarees, he will carry his seabag, weighted down with the kind of sheer bowling ballage as they carry on the tanks in Iraq, along with his bedding, to his new barracks. In fact, he will march there, in step.
All in all, your son's first day lasted a week. I remember it was without a doubt the longest day of my life. Much of the time he will be sitting in a classroom. The academic side is very important...but it certainly isn't brain surgery. The drilling counts as well, and the physical training is big there, as you can imagine.
In fact, expect a letter where he explains what an Irish Pennant is...
Today, they train the women in Great Lakes as well. In my day they had it so frickin' easy! They were in Orlando...
😛
 
ForeverRio said:
My initial thought was to limit my letters because he'd have to do 10 push ups for each piece of mail he received.

I don't know about that, but just a suggestion, I'd advise against putting heart stickers and pretty things on the envelope, if you don't want him getting a hard time. A friend of mine did that to a buddy of his who was going through recruit training, sending him a greeting card in a pink, perfume-scented envelope with little stickers all over it, like it came from a girl, because he knew how much of a hard time the drill instructors would give him! :evilha:
If I remember correctly, the drill instructor made him do 10 pushups for every sticker on the envelope! :evilha:

Ahh, good times...

Knox The Hatter said:
In fact, expect a letter where he explains what an Irish Pennant is...

Geez, to this day, I STILL despise those things. It's even worse now, with the new digital camoflauge utilities they make us wear. Those things fall apart like there's no tomorrow! Also, I remember the Supply Chiefs, as well. Mine weren't Filipino, though. They were a bunch of overweight, angry civilian contractors who would jerk you all over the place trying to measure you and scream at you if they were trying to measure your trouser hem and your legs weren't shoulder width apart. They'd also be yelling at you to stand relaxed so they could see the fit, but how can you relax when you're being screamed at? Of course, after having to go through the process with several hundred recruits a day, I'd probably be a little irritable, myself. Good times.
 
Knox The Hatter said:
The surest way to tell how far along in training they are is by he length of their hair.

I remember those days. The first week I was down there, I would salute anybody that had hair.

Knox The Hatter said:
In fact, expect a letter where he explains what an Irish Pennant is...

I remember those things. I had one on my shirt and I got cranked in the chowhall by a six pack of company commanders. I had to do 50 push ups for each one. By the time I went back into line, my arms were like jelly going back to the barracks.

No doubt your son is going to hear things said to him that would want to make him rip their lungs out ("You dumb shit", "asshole", and my favorite "Did your mother send you here to piss me off?"). I guess the thing to remember is not to take any of it personally and to understand it their job. They are under a great deal of pressure to train the recruits and prepare them for wartime. This is serious shit. My take on the screaming and gratitious remarks is to convey the sense of urgency to learn the stuff they are being taught and to get it right. If one person fucks up in the field (whether it be wartime or peace time) it could cost them their life (GOD FORBID) and possible take somebody with them (GOD FORBID). I wouldn't want that job, that's for sure.

One bit of advice I left out is to keep a LOW profile. The less people in authority know about him the better off he will be.

One of my fondest memories of boot camp (besides graduating)was when I was in my sixth week of training, seven shipmates and I volunteered for a night of intensive training. Intensive training was what you had coming to you when you got demerits. You had to do a series of excercises for like three hours straight nonstop. It was always led by the officer of the day (OOD) and, depending on who it is, could be totally unbearable or not that bad. Well one day the OOD was this guy named DCC Jones (not his real name). This guy made Woody Allen look like a psychopath. Just imaging him the guy that was supposed to be screaming at you was enough to make us want to volunteer to see this guy in action. Well we all showed up there and did our thing. I may add, I had the hardest time doing push ups b/c I was laughing so hard under my breath at his intimadating (can you tell I am being sarcastic) orders. For the next two weeks, that was all we were talking about and we would do impersonations of him in the barracks when the day was done. My most fondest memory was the camraderie I developed with the guys (and a couple of girls). It just goes to show that you can share a room with seventy other recruits if you just pull your weight on the work detail and take showers every day (very important).

Rio, I am glad that I helped alleivate some of your concerns about your son going to boot camp. He will be just fine. He will also be a much better person when he graduates, you wait and see. He will also be in the best shape of his life. I went down from a strapping 198 lbs to 172 lbs but my bench press went up almost 50 pounds from all the push ups I was doing.
 
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WOW!

Knox, Flatfoot & Giantfan... you guys are a fountain of information! This is great - it's like having my own personal tour guide of what my son must be going through right now... thank you! I still don't know if I have figured out what an Irish Pennant is, but hopefully he can fill me in... and I'll get back to you!

Knox, don't get mad now, but, I've been informed that their days now begins at 0600 - the slackers! LOL Fortunately for my son, he already kept his hair crew cut for the last three years (very military mind-set since his early teens), so the haircut won't be too much of a shock for him. I'm sure the language is just a *vulgar* as ever, but I do believe the recruits are called the rather tame name of "Rickys" Thanks so much for sharing your experiences of your first few days; I welcome any other insight of the following days/weeks you care to share - just don't be too gruesome, please; after all, I am still The Mom LOL

Flatfoot, you really made me laugh with your suggestions about the mail I send. That was so mean, what your friends' buddy did to him! LOL No worries, I would never do that to my son... but that is actually pretty funny stuff.

Giantfan, it cracked me up that you saluted anybody who had hair LOL My son has had a crew cut for the last three years so I'm wondering if he'll break away from that to distinguish himself from the recruits that come in after him. One of my biggest concerns, as a mom, is how he's going to manage under the intense direction of the officers (was that polite enough? LOL) He has three years of high school ROTC under his belt, so I know that he's somewhat prepared for it... I just bristle when I think of the abrasive way these recruits are treated. But, as you pointed out, they're training for something VERY important and this may be the best way to convey the seriousness of it all. I haven't communicated with him yet so I don't know how the dynamics are working for him. Also, we took pics of him without a shirt before he left so we can have before and after shots - he was in excellent shape before he left, but I know he's going to be even better by the time Pass In Review rolls around.

Thanks to you guys, again... it means so much to me to be able to have this personal insight. My coping mechanisms work so much better when there are fewer mysteries.

THANK YOU!
 
One more thing, Rio:
An Irish Pennant is literally a thread. A thread hanging off of your clothes. You're not supposed to have anything like that. Of course, Knox the Schmucko's got one right on top of his white hat in his formal Great Lakes pictures. If you wanna see it, PM me LOL 😀

"Pass in Review"...oh, man, haven't heard that phraseology in a while.
I'm reminded of our practice drills. They used to play this musty old record of 'Anchors Aweigh' in the drill hall for us. The record started with this high, sissified voice barking out pompously, "prepare...to path...in review!" You better not be marchin' and laughin' at the same time, either, or it's huffin' and puffin' from doin' pushups. One day, the record broke in mid march, and it messed up the timing, and we got mashed for it...
This has been a fun thread.
 
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