Hello everyone!
I’m a bit nervous posting about this or maybe using the wrong terms or smth, but please don’t feel offended. I don’t know a thing about tickling but the common stuff. So… maybe I should start with the actual “problem”. 2 years ago, I moved from Germany to Scotland (I’m a 20-year-old female college student) and as it sometimes happens, I met my soon-to-be husband shortly afterwards. We immediately had this connection thing going on, despite me being a bit of an introvert (not shy, I’m just not a very sociable person) while he’s quite outgoing and snarky. Don’t get me wrong, he’s really caring and passionate about everything and I really love him, he’s just daring and very sarcastic. He’s the more affectionate part of our relationship (I don’t like showing feelings that much, but again, I really do love him and he knows that), so the whole touchy business is down to him (holding hands, hugging, kissing in public etc.) while I prefer something more private.
He recently told me about his tickle fetish and seemed a bit embarrassed about it. I’ve got to admit I felt disappointed, because we never kept big secrets like this to ourselves. For example: Before our first time together, I told him the only sexual experience I had, was with girls and he told me about his little thing for bondage (just light stuff, ties and handcuffs for teasing/edging, something I really enjoy). I’d say we were never shy in the bedroom department, so his little confession after almost two years was a bit… I don’t know. He told me he felt guilty for hiding it and in retrospect I totally understand him being secretive about it. It’s always hard to talk about your kinks, so I’m not really angry. Just a bit upset. My reaction was kinda missing and I only told him that I didn't mind (but you know, I was a bit upset something he noticed) and ever since we avoided the subject.
I tried to reflect our past tickling experiences and well, I already suspected that he has a thing for tickling. There was barley a day where he did not initiate a little wrestling/tickle fight, but I always thought it had to do with the physical contact (again, I’m not a very touchy person so I thought that was normal and just cute). Sure, I like to poke him from time to time because his laugh is quite adorable, but tickling never bothered me. Before we met, I didn't even know how ticklish I am, just like I didn't know that something like a tickle fetish exists. During our little fights he’s easily beaten (he’s far more ticklish than I am and a bit on the skinny side) and he always seemed to like it, I just thought it was a domination thing. Anyway, I think there was quite a lot of playful tickling (or not. I mean it often lead to sex so it was arousing too?) but now it stopped and I really don’t know what to do.
I think his fetish or kink or whatever is cute and it got me curious because I just want him to feel good and safe. I may have waited to long and I feel so guilty, so I started to do some research. I think that we could include tickling easily into our little tie up games, I just don’t know if that would be the right thing to do. I do enjoy being tickled, like being cuddled, but always felt a bit stupid laughing my head off or giggling (yah, serious person talking here. I’m no fun and don’t laugh a lot) and I’m worried about that. Also the question of how to start the important conversation? He’s just too proud and stubborn when it comes down to little fights or discussions. Maybe you could help me or give me some advice? What would you like to hear from your partner? And could you recommend any “guide” how to tickle, but in a erotic way? Blimey, I really feel stupid posting this, but I’m willing to give it a go.
I’m a bit nervous posting about this or maybe using the wrong terms or smth, but please don’t feel offended. I don’t know a thing about tickling but the common stuff. So… maybe I should start with the actual “problem”. 2 years ago, I moved from Germany to Scotland (I’m a 20-year-old female college student) and as it sometimes happens, I met my soon-to-be husband shortly afterwards. We immediately had this connection thing going on, despite me being a bit of an introvert (not shy, I’m just not a very sociable person) while he’s quite outgoing and snarky. Don’t get me wrong, he’s really caring and passionate about everything and I really love him, he’s just daring and very sarcastic. He’s the more affectionate part of our relationship (I don’t like showing feelings that much, but again, I really do love him and he knows that), so the whole touchy business is down to him (holding hands, hugging, kissing in public etc.) while I prefer something more private.
He recently told me about his tickle fetish and seemed a bit embarrassed about it. I’ve got to admit I felt disappointed, because we never kept big secrets like this to ourselves. For example: Before our first time together, I told him the only sexual experience I had, was with girls and he told me about his little thing for bondage (just light stuff, ties and handcuffs for teasing/edging, something I really enjoy). I’d say we were never shy in the bedroom department, so his little confession after almost two years was a bit… I don’t know. He told me he felt guilty for hiding it and in retrospect I totally understand him being secretive about it. It’s always hard to talk about your kinks, so I’m not really angry. Just a bit upset. My reaction was kinda missing and I only told him that I didn't mind (but you know, I was a bit upset something he noticed) and ever since we avoided the subject.
I tried to reflect our past tickling experiences and well, I already suspected that he has a thing for tickling. There was barley a day where he did not initiate a little wrestling/tickle fight, but I always thought it had to do with the physical contact (again, I’m not a very touchy person so I thought that was normal and just cute). Sure, I like to poke him from time to time because his laugh is quite adorable, but tickling never bothered me. Before we met, I didn't even know how ticklish I am, just like I didn't know that something like a tickle fetish exists. During our little fights he’s easily beaten (he’s far more ticklish than I am and a bit on the skinny side) and he always seemed to like it, I just thought it was a domination thing. Anyway, I think there was quite a lot of playful tickling (or not. I mean it often lead to sex so it was arousing too?) but now it stopped and I really don’t know what to do.
I think his fetish or kink or whatever is cute and it got me curious because I just want him to feel good and safe. I may have waited to long and I feel so guilty, so I started to do some research. I think that we could include tickling easily into our little tie up games, I just don’t know if that would be the right thing to do. I do enjoy being tickled, like being cuddled, but always felt a bit stupid laughing my head off or giggling (yah, serious person talking here. I’m no fun and don’t laugh a lot) and I’m worried about that. Also the question of how to start the important conversation? He’s just too proud and stubborn when it comes down to little fights or discussions. Maybe you could help me or give me some advice? What would you like to hear from your partner? And could you recommend any “guide” how to tickle, but in a erotic way? Blimey, I really feel stupid posting this, but I’m willing to give it a go.
